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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26840434">The Shade's Destruction</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sof_a_loaf/pseuds/sof_a_loaf'>sof_a_loaf</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne &amp; Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Harry Potter Next Generation, Multi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 12:51:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>86,488</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26840434</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sof_a_loaf/pseuds/sof_a_loaf</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>the summer's finally come to end, and the anticipation of another term is growing within the student body. especially between a band of five friends...or, what used to be five friends. </p><p>not only anticipation, however, but also fear and confusion. </p><p>because even after everything that had happened last year, everything they went through, harry potter is still having nightmares. his scar is still hurting, nothing is certain...and certainly nothing is safe.   </p><p>even when thoughts of the dangerous future were forgotten, nothing was any clearer. with seemingly strong friendships shattered, words unspoken, demanding school matters approaching, memories of the past resurfacing, and "feelings" evolving, cas and ophelia hardly have time to catch their breath before another curveball is thrown their way. </p><p>cas, ophelia, scorpius, al, and teddy had barely recovered before they were thrown headfirst into another fight, filled with surprises and new decisions. no matter what they do, one thing is certain: </p><p>a storm is coming </p><p>and they better be ready when it does.</p><p> </p><p>all rights reserved for original characters. all other characters belong to j.k. rowling. <br/>mature language. that's it</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Albus Severus Potter/Original Male Character(s), Scorpius Malfoy/Original Female Character(s), Teddy Lupin/Original Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Al couldn’t help but grin as he, Cas, and Ophelia stepped onto Platform 9 ¾. No matter how annoying school could be, nothing would ever beat the start of the year: seeing everyone he had missed, and returning to his home away from home. Cas and Ophelia were laughing about some unknown inside joke, and Al felt completely and utterly content.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt his smile grow even wider as yet another member of their less-than-conventional friend group sauntered over. Teddy Lupin smirked as he surveyed the group, pulling all three of the others into strong hugs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Glad to see you survived the summer, losers.” Ophelia rolled her eyes, punching him in the arm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You too, asshole.” Al hid his grin at their antics, part of him finding it hilarious and the other part enraged that they wouldn’t just suck it up and confess to each other already. But that was beside the point. Now wasn’t the time for useless matchmaking. Al would be damned if he let anything change how he felt or ruin how excited he was for another year with his friends at the school he loved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, most of his friends.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There it was again: the intrusive thoughts that had been plaguing his brain for the past week up until now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What the hell were they going to do about Scorpius?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Part of Al just wanted everything to go back to normal. He couldn’t deny the fact that Scorpius had very quickly become one of his best friends last year and...well, he had been there for him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he came out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whenever he needed someone to talk to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he just needed to laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius had been there. He had done so much for Al that he could never repay, and he would always be grateful for that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>On the other hand…he had completely thrown all of that out the window at the end of last year with four simple words: “The truce is off.” Al couldn’t say that Scorpius had victimized him personally, but even the basic idea that he would do or say something like that to Al’s cousin, his best friend, showed that he was capable of doing it to anyone. Al couldn’t forgive that. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> forgive that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At least, until Scorpius pulled out the newly added stick up his ass and came up with one hell of an apology.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tuned back into the conversation just as Teddy was notifying him: “Hey, look! Your boyfriend made it.” This comment was reciprocated with a musical laugh from a boy approaching them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All pressing negative thoughts forgotten, Al turned all his attention to Jonah.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al still couldn’t believe that he was dating Jonah.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The boy in question waltzed up to the four of them, stopping quickly to kiss Al softly on the lips. It only lasted for a second, but it was all that Al needed--all that he had needed and missed the entire summer. The thought of having another whole year to do that set off a spark in him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah broke away, hugging Ophelia and Cas quickly, and sharing a quick, knowing look with Teddy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You guys didn’t miss me too much, did you?” Al rolled his eyes, his smile still widening.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nah, of course not. Why would I ever miss you, my </span>
  <em>
    <span>boyfriend</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Jonah laughed, immediately earning a good-natured punch in the arm from Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You two are disgusting.” Teddy and Ophelia nodded vigorously, even muttering their own “ew” and “gross” for added effect.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I missed this.” Al couldn’t stop himself from blurting out. Ophelia raised a fake offended eyebrow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, so when we’re all together it’s “I missed this” but when it’s just Cas and me at your house it’s “You guys are so loud it’s 3 a.m” and “Get the hell out of my room”. Such a hypocrite.” Al felt his eyes roll again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, yeah, obviously.” Teddy gasped dramatically.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Albus Severus Potter! I cannot believe you.” Everyone burst into fits of giggles which evolved into full-on laughter. Soon enough, tears were rolling down Al’s face and his sides ached. Teddy resurfaced first, sighing and taking a few deep breaths to calm himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn, guys, Sunshine’s missing out...I can’t believe he ditched this.” Teddy gestured up and down, clearly highlighting everyone in the group. Al had to agree. Everything Scorpius had done had dug him a grave so deep that only he could claw himself out. If that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Come to think of it...where was Scorpius?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, it didn’t take Al too long to find him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even more unfortunately, he wasn’t alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al watched in abject horror as Scorpius continued to entangle himself with a girl that Al vaguely recognized from their year. She was sporting a green and silver tie, which meant Slytherin and…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was drop-dead gorgeous.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her long, honey-colored hair was dyed a regal purple at the ends, only making her hair look more golden. While it may look tacky on some, this girl managed to make it look effortless and stunning. Al couldn’t get a good enough look at her eyes to tell much more than that they were a deep blue, but one thing was clear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The girl was beautiful.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius knew it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al was gay and he knew it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he was pretty sure everyone else knew it too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instinctively, Al grabbed Cas tightly by the wrist. Thankfully, Jonah and Teddy followed his gaze and offered their help, Jonah grabbing her other wrist and Teddy gripping her shoulders. Cas was vaguely confused, seeing as she hadn’t caught on yet. Ophelia had, though, because she ground out an angry and worried “Don’t look now…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it was too late. Cas had spotted them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was frozen for a split second. For a moment, she looked as if she might cry. Then, her icy demeanor was back, and she was lunging in their direction. Luckily, everyone had seen that coming, and Cas was stuck in place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al’s heart broke. Cas was good at hiding it, he had to give her that, but...there was only so much she could hide from him. They’d known each other their whole lives--he’d be damned if he couldn’t read Cas like a book. Her face was painted into a grimace, but there was hurt behind her eyes. If he could do anything, he would, but this was a predicament only Scorpius could fix, and...and, well, he’d better fix it fast. Because Cas was </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurting</span>
  </em>
  <span> and this had to stop.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was at this point that Al realized he was the only one still holding onto Cas’ wrists.  Making sure Cas wouldn’t run for it, Al reluctantly let go. He leaned in, lowering his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You gonna be okay?” Cas nodded, swallowing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somehow, he didn’t believe her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just then, a sharp whistle sounded through the air, signaling the arrival of the Hogwarts Express. The group used this as an excuse to move off of the subject, gathering their things and heading for the train. Finding an empty compartment, Al squeezed next to the window as the other four filed in, finding their seats. This change of scenery and subject had opened Al’s mind to an even more uncomfortable subject.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The fact that, despite all of the events they had suffered through last year, all of the extensive effort they had gone through to protect Hogwarts, his dad’s scar was still hurting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thought that everything they had gone through might not be finished after all terrified him. He had already told Cas and Ophelia everything, seeing as it was rather hard to lie about why your dad was still waking up every night in a cold sweat, gripping his head and groaning in pain.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something was wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And none of them had any idea what.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al didn’t even want to think about what it could mean, and yet, it was all his mind could focus on when it had the chance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The train was well on its way to Hogwarts when Al noticed a certain snake out of the corner of his eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius and his arm candy were strolling down the hallway and had stopped in front of the glass window to theirs. Al watched as he glanced at everyone, making eye contact with Ophelia, Teddy, and Jonah before offering Al a small smile and a wave. He turned his attention to Cas last, of course, matching her gaze and continuing to stare until the girl put a hand on his chest, pulling him away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al would be lying if he said he wasn’t confused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy beat him to it. “What the hell was that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’d tell you if I knew.” The blue-haired boy nodded at Al’s sentiment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, he blows us all off at the end of the year, Cas especially, ignores us all summer, doesn’t say anything to us on the platform, and then walks by here and makes creepy eye contact? Like really creepy eye contact? And,” he added, turning his gaze back to Al, “Why do </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> get a smile, by the way? If he’s gonna be a douche, I at least ask for equal rights.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al had duly noted that while Jonah was agreeing with Teddy and himself, Cas and Ophelia had thus been silent. He knew them both well enough to know that they were both lost in their own thoughts. Cas in pain, mentally pummeling Scorpius, and Ophelia glazing over discreet ways to murder a person, most likely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The train couldn’t have arrived at Hogwarts soon enough. Everyone needed something to distract them from their intrusive thoughts about Scorpius, his new girlfriend, and the ever-looming threat that was posed by his dad’s scar. Al included. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Allowing the sight of Hogwarts as the train came to a stop to bring a bright grin to his face, Al grabbed his things and led the charge out of the train. Some normal school atmosphere (as tedious and annoying as it might turn out to be) would be good for all of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>School would change things. His dad would be fine, and Scorpius would have to suck it up someday. He had a feeling that this year was going to turn out okay.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hoped it would, at least.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It had to.</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ophelia felt the anticipation wash over her as she and the others entered the Great Hall, the large room and its tables already filled to bursting with students and teachers. She had to smile at how familiar it all was--how welcoming. It was a nice change from all of the drama currently going on in their lives with Harry Potter and a certain someone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A change that, inevitably, wasn’t long-lasting.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As they began to part ways with Teddy and Al, who were returning to their respective house tables, they strolled past an unsuspecting and familiar blond.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Of course, Cas caught it before any of them. She changed her direction so as to purposefully bump Scorpius’s shoulder roughly with hers. The action made him stop and whip around.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Watch where you’re going, Malfoy.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was so familiar, it was almost sickening.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A malevolent grin spread across Scorpius’s face, cocking an eyebrow at the rest of them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, don’t feel too bad--I know it’s really hard for people like you to watch where they’re going, especially the ones who have their heads as far up their asses as you do, Weasley.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia practically felt her jaw hit the floor. She felt like punching Scorpius, screaming, and crying all at the same time. Everyone else was equally angry and bewildered, seeing as Scorpius had never dared to say something as mean and spiteful as that, even at the beginning of last year. There was a line, and he had crossed it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia felt the pit at the bottom of her stomach grow even larger as a musical, yet cruel laugh punctuated the air. Out of the crowd beside Scorpius stepped the girl he had been so publicly making out with just hours before.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She was even prettier up close.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her golden hair fell in soft waves to the middle of her torso, looking as if it were dipped in purple velvet. Her eyes mirrored the shade of Ophelia’s almost exactly, and were just slightly darker, but held absolutely no warmth. They were truly ice, something that made her bright smile and rosy cheeks a hundred times more threatening. Her laughing quieted as she gripped Scorpius’s pale hand tightly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Who’re you talking to, Scorpius?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He rolled his eyes, turning back to smile down at the girl. “Oh, them? Nobodies. Just some losers I used to hang out with last year. No big deal.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wow. How different it was to be called a ‘loser’ from him. Especially now. Teddy “tsked” loudly, shuffling his feet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, last I checked, you were ready to die for this group of “losers” last year.” Scorpius shifted uncomfortably, muttering something indistinguishable under his breath. The girl beside him cleared her throat, inserting herself back into the conversation. Scorpius took it as a cue.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, while we’re at it--everyone, this is my girlfriend Victoria.” The girl held out a hand, but none of them shook it. Pulling it back in what seemed to be disgust, she smiled sickeningly sweetly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yep, that’s me. But you can call me Vicky. Only Scorpius calls me Tori, he’s great at coming up with nicknames. Isn’t that right, boo?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia was going to vomit all over Scorpius in a second if this girl didn’t shut up. Cas smiled as fake as she could.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I could come up with a few.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Where Scorpius would’ve once laughed it off or fired back with a cheap shot, he merely rolled his eyes arrogantly, exuding that he was completely above all of them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was horrifying.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can we get going?” Vicky asked innocently, but the comment had a bite to it that Ophelia was completely sure was intentional. Scorpius nodded lazily.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Please.” Without another word, he wrapped his arm around Vicky’s shoulder, turning the both of them away and back toward the Slytherin table.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia looked to her best friend, half expecting her to lash out and run after the boy. What came out was, instead, a scoff.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Vicky, huh? More like Dicky.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The group shared one look, and burst into laughter, choking out things like “Yes, that’s perfect!” and “Why didn’t I think of that?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They all settled down for dinner awhile later, stuffing their faces with the food they always missed and catching up on everyone’s summer. It was as perfect as they could’ve hoped for and the normalcy they all needed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As Cas and Ophelia climbed the stairs toward the Gryffindor Tower, soundly abusing Scorpius all the way, Ophelia couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of content. Sure, life wasn’t perfect, it was far from it, but at least she and Cas had each other. They had a few other amazing friends, and their whole lives ahead of them. It was--</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“P-phelia…?” She could tell by Cas’s tone that something was wrong. Reluctantly, she turned over her shoulder to find Cas staring, frozen, out the window. Walking up to her, Ophelia leveled her gaze with her best friend’s, following her horrified eyes to the Forbidden Forest, the only light emitting from Hagrid’s hut. The light illuminated the outskirts of the forest, washing out the first trees, and painting them in an eerie glow. The light also made apparent the large mass of the nauseatingly familiar dark oil making its way across the grounds. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia felt her throat dry up. Her stomach dropped as she stumbled back, turning her back to the window. She pressed her hands to her chest, unsure if she was trying to keep herself from crying, screaming, or throwing up. Turning her eyes radically to Cas, she found her best friend sitting on the stairs, slumped over herself, running her hands frantically through her hair and wiping at her eyes, as if she could stop the tears from falling before they started. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“N-no..no, no, this can’t be happening.” Phelia let her legs give out from under her so she would come to rest roughly next to Cas on the stairs.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She was back. Nagini.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cas fidgeted restlessly, clearly unsure of where to even start.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I--I thought...we k-killed...we killed Nagini, it was over. It was over. Th--there’s no...no way. We were...done, we were done, it can’t just---we didn’t...we couldn’t have f-failed, I--” Ophelia was pulled from the thoughts she was drowning in by sudden silence from Cas. “Phelia?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What are we gonna do?” was all that came out. “We...we messed up, Cas, and now...I have no idea where to go.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Here they had thought everything was over--Nagini was leading the charge and she was dead. They had found a way to kill her, she was supposed to be dead.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Now they had one less Horcrux dead and exactly no idea of how one could be killed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They sat there on the stairs for what was probably hours, since the next time they looked up, the stairwells were empty and the castle was quiet. Ophelia steeled herself with a few deep breaths before willing herself to speak.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, looks like we have to get the band back together, huh?” Cas shot her a quizzical look.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The band never broke up, Phelia. We’re all still...playing? Or some shit?” The comment might’ve made her laugh yesterday, but now everything paled when she thought about their current situation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know what I mean.” The small smile was gone from Cas’s face in an instant. She swallowed, looking away from Ophelia.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Actually, I don’t, because I didn’t think you were that stupid.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The name was unspoken, but both of them knew exactly what they were talking about. Ophelia sighed resignedly. “Look, Cas, I’m just as pissed at you are, and I hate this just as much as--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you? Because if you really did mean what you said, you wouldn’t even be suggesting it.” She took another deep breath.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come on Cas, you know we need him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How can you even think about that, after everything he said...after everything he</span>
  <em>
    <span> did,</span>
  </em>
  <span> with</span>
  <em>
    <span> her</span>
  </em>
  <span>? How do you know he’ll even agree?” Cas’s voice began to rise above-normal volume.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s a risk we have to take! We can’t figure out what to do without him until we know he’s not helping us.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He abandoned us, Ophelia! He threw everything we had out the window--we almost died for him and he blew us off like it was nothing?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We barely survived with him!” Ophelia’s voice was getting louder too, but she wouldn’t have cared if she woke up the whole castle. “You and Al almost died! Scorpius is a great wizard and you know it. Like him or not, you have to admit that! I don’t even want to think about what would’ve happened if he wasn’t there!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cas threw her hands up, but Ophelia knew she was getting somewhere.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I….fuck, I know, Phelia, but...I just--I hate him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>No, you don’t.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I get it Cas, I hate him too, I’m furious at him, but regardless of what a shitty person he is, you know we’ve got no other choice.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She sighed. “Fuck you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Is that a yes?”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s a fuck you, actually.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut up.” the smiles were returning to their faces now. The road was long and uncertain ahead of them once again, but they </span>
  <em>
    <span>would</span>
  </em>
  <span> always have each other. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia shuffled her feet. “So, uh, what now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cas shook her head. “We have to tell them.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ophelia glanced to the clock, grinning when she registered that the time was almost one in the morning. “Now’s as good a time as any.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come on. You and I both know we’re not going to be able to sleep tonight anyways. We might as well be productive.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Remind me again why I’m friends with you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Because no one else will tolerate you.” Cas punched Ophelia in the arm.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Rude.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even though a definite decision hadn’t been made, they both walked down the staircase, wandering slowly toward the Slytherin common room.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you think we can kill Dicky while we’re there?” Cas suggested, and Ophelia had to laugh.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wish.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe I’ll just--break her nose. A <em>little</em>.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Somehow, Ophelia knew this was going to be a long night. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Cas gave Ophelia one last scorching glare as she stood at the foot of Scorpius’ bed. She slowly made her way forward as if in a trance, she stoically ignored the pounding of her heart as she reminded herself of what he had said just hours before. She remembered how he looked at her from over the head of his new blonde arm candy. Everything she thought she knew about Scorpius had been thrown in the trash, every interaction she had had with him over the past year had been destroyed with just one encounter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had told him to ‘watch it, Malfoy’ a million times and not once had he blatantly insulted her, sure, there were plenty of close calls, but he had never crossed that line. He had turned their edgy banter into truly heartbreaking insults. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took in sleeping Scorpius. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His clear, pale skin glowed in the moonlight, making him look like some sort of beautiful Veela. His defined features were highlighted by his relaxed facial expression. His heart-shaped, pink lips were parted slightly as he breathed through his mouth lightly. Even in sleep, his hair was perfectly placed to make Cas’ whole body come to life, his light hair tumbled over his closed eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was gorgeous.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas mentally slapped herself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Goddammit.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He has a girlfriend. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hates you</span>
  <em>
    <span> and</span>
  </em>
  <span> your best friends. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You</span>
  </em>
  <span> hate him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas couldn’t let herself think like this, he truly crossed a line, and she couldn’t let that slide. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas snapped herself out of it. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Just get it over with. Wake up the sick bastard. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Cas let out a short huff of air and shook Scorpius lightly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius,” He rolled away from her, still clearly asleep, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius, wake up.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” He rolled back onto his back, Cas shook slightly more vigorously this time. She moved closer to his face in order for him to hear her better without her waking up the whole house. She was just inches away from his face now. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius</span>
  </em>
  <span>, </span>
  <em>
    <span>wake up you useless piece of--</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes snapped opened and Cas felt her world melt away. His eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fuck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span> His eyes. That pastel shade of green alone would have stolen Cas’ heart, but every time she saw those streaks of shining silver her heart broke. Because she knew that those eyes would never be hers, they belonged to a beautiful blond with deep purple ends. Even without “Dicky” in the mix, those eyes still were Scorpius’, the person who couldn’t even be civil to her for more than a couple months before swinging to the opposite side of the spectrum. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were frozen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas hovered over his face, paralyzed by the situation, she could feel his warm breath fanning softly over her cheeks. Much to Cas’ horror, he didn’t move either, they just stood, taunting each other with the others presence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment ended with a strangled: “Fuck, Cas! What the hell?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for not slapping me...?” Cas managed to choke out as she stepped away from the bed. The uncertainness of the situation made Cas sick to her stomach, she had no idea how, or who, he was going to act like. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He scoffed good-naturedly, “Don’t thank me yet.” He mumbled as he got out of bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas could have sworn she </span>
  <em>
    <span>heard</span>
  </em>
  <span> her heart break. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was so familiar. It was something the old Scorpius would have said, and it just reminded her of how it used to be. She tried to push the flood of memories that crashed to the front of her brain. Scorpius asking for the truce, detention with Scorpius, Scorpius catching her before she collapsed, Scorpius in the Infirmary. Everything that she had fallen for had been snatched away from her at the sound of four words. “The truce is off.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With one good-natured scoff and sarcastic comment, Cas was reminded of what he used to be, and all the anger rushed back. Most of it was aimed at a gorgeous purple-haired bitch for changing him, but how could Scorpius let himself be changed </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>much. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s going on?” Al rubbed his eyes, concern seeping through his sleepy voice. “Cas, Phelia? Are you okay?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Define okay.” Cas joked, trying, and failing, to lighten the situation and distract herself from her own fear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, do I need to give you some privacy?” Scorpius’ smug voice cut through the silence. Cas took a moment to take him in. A Holyhead Harpies shirt hung loosely over his lean, athletic frame. He had paired it with baggy, grey sweatpants. His platinum hair was still messy from sleep, but Cas didn’t think anyone in their right mind would find that it made him less attractive.  Cas felt her insides melt, he looked </span>
  <em>
    <span>so good</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and she hated herself for thinking so. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You’re so much better than this. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia shot him a cold glare, “No, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>asshole</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Unfortunately, we need you too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, now I </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> want to help.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas numbed herself to the horror she felt as Ophelia explained what they had seen. Somehow hearing it out loud made it so much worse, and the wave of anxiety she felt as they waited for a response from the Slytherins was even more intense. As much as she hated herself for admitting it, they needed both of them. There was no way they were going to survive without Al and Scorpius. Thankfully, Al spoke up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His bright eyes were a little </span>
  <em>
    <span>too</span>
  </em>
  <span> bright, but nonetheless, he nodded, “I’m with you guys.” He gripped Ophelia’s hand. “For better or for worse, you can count on me.” Cas let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding and went to hug Al. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As soon as she felt the familiar arms surround her she instantly felt part of the weight she was carrying lift. At least she had Al, that would never change. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius cleared his throat, “As </span>
  <em>
    <span>touching</span>
  </em>
  <span> as this is. I still see absolutely </span>
  <em>
    <span>no reason </span>
  </em>
  <span>why </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> should risk my life </span>
  <em>
    <span>again</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took every fiber in Cas’ body to not lunge at him, pummel him until he understood how much his words </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurt</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Luckily, Ophelia read the situation like a book and got upset before Cas had too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Because</span>
  </em>
  <span> you complete and utter piece of </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>. We’ve been at school for a night and you’ve already treated us like the dirt on the bottom of your overly priced shoe, we. Still. Need. You. At one point you were part of our team, and we made a pretty damn good one, and we </span>
  <em>
    <span>still</span>
  </em>
  <span> barely survived. So holy fuck, Scorpius, just say you’ll help us. You don’t have to like it and you won’t have to interact with us “losers” otherwise.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius shifted, but still held his head high. “Good, cause I won't.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas huffed, getting more and more irritated and worried by the second. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that a yes?” She made sure to let as much coldness she could muster seep into her tone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius rolled his eyes as if to make sure that nobody forgot that he was above them and this situation. “Yes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia sighed, “Great, just great. I mean there is no way in hell Cas and I are sleeping tonight so I suggest we all meet and talk, and sorta plan in the library.” When silence followed Ophelia continued, “R-right now.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al had the nerve to laugh, Cas reluctantly joined in. “I mean, I expected nothing less.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In an </span>
  <em>
    <span>extremely </span>
  </em>
  <span>awkward silence, they all made their way out of the Slytherin dorms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas had shut down her brain. If she let half of the thoughts that were pressed up against her mental block she would probably end up in the fetal position in a corner somewhere. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, we still gotta get Teddy.” Al pointed out, Scorpius groaned as they changed direction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, let’s make it a day trip, shall we?” Everyone ignored the comment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once they arrived Cas spoke up. “Phelia, you just go, we might get caught if we all try breaking in and,” Cas shot a glare at Scorpius, “we wouldn’t want this turning into a ‘day trip’” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded sullenly and everyone watched in silence as she tapped on the barrels in intricate, specific patterns. Everyone was acutely aware that if she got one step wrong they would all be drenched in vinegar. A round of “good job,” and “thank God,” whispered around the group once she successfully opened the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas smirked, grasping desperately at the slightly amusing situation Ophelia was about to step into. Cas of all people knew that there were a lot of of...unsaid words between the two. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Have fun.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia rolled her eyes playfully at her best friend, then disappeared through the doorway. </span>
</p><p>
  <span> &lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ophelia hovered over Teddy cautiously, unsure of what to do with her hands, or at all, as she looked over the sleeping boy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His hair gave the appearance that he had just stuck a fork into an outlet, sticking out in all directions. It was so completely messy, it made Teddy’s normally tousled hair look tame. She knew he would be mortified, overdramatically or not, if he knew anyone had seen it in any other state than it’s carefully curated one, but Ophelia found it adorable.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes were shut and his face a blank illusion of peace. Even though his usual smirk or witty remark was nowhere to be found, it was so very Teddy that Ophelia forgot why she was there in the first place. What was visible of his figure was dwarfed in a huge purple sweatshirt, bearing the Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes logo. Ophelia was almost certain Cas and her family had gifted it to him, which made it all the more endearing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What stood out to Ophelia the most was the position in which Teddy was sleeping. There was no pillow under his head, and she quickly saw that the reason for this was that he had it gripped tightly to his chest, hugging it as if it were a person. It further strengthened her urge to snuggle up beside him, wrap him in her arms and forget that her world was crashing down around her for just a few hours longer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But she couldn’t do that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now isn’t the time for stupid schoolgirl crushes, Phelia, her brain chided her. How could you even be thinking about that when you just found out everything you did last year was a complete waste of time and still almost got you killed--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biting the bullet, Ophelia reached forward, gripped Teddy’s shoulders softly, and began to shake him awake. At first, there was no result.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She continued to shake, harder this time. Now, all she got in return was a small stir or two, and some incomprehensible words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Great,</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy! Teddy, wake up.” Using her last shreds of patience, Ophelia shook him one last time, as hard as she could. He sat straight up, eyes still closed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Quit it, would you?” Teddy mumbled, rubbing his eyes. “I have a girlfriend.” Ophelia was completely sure he was joking and yet, the idea of the suggestion still stung.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good God, Lupin, now is really not the time for your bullshit.” Teddy’s eyes shot open.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That would be me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit.” He shook his head a few times as if trying to get water out of his ears. His eyes were wide open at this point, and filled with what Ophelia could only describe as immense confusion. “It is you. Oh, a-and...nevermind what I said, I don’t actually have a girlfriend.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wait--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, why are you here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The question dragged Ophelia by the ear out of the ocean of thoughts she had just been drowning in. “Well, uh, it’s a bit hard to believe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy scoffed. “Um, after we saved the whole school from a giant zombie snake Horcrux lady last year, I doubt anything could surprise me anymore.” Ophelia couldn’t help but smile sadly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s the thing Teddy...we didn’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” The word had some humor to it, obviously showing Ophelia that he thought her solemn phrase to be some kind of joke. When she remained silent, he repeated it, quieter and more afraid. “What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, we did save the school, but...it...i-it didn’t work, Teddy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please tell me this is some kind of cruel joke.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I...wish I could.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy let out a noise that sounded like the combination of a growl and a sob, but before he could go any further, Ophelia took a deep breath and explained the whole situation as fast as she could. What they had seen, what that meant, everything about Scorpius, all of it. When she finished, he too was silent. She stood there restlessly for a few seconds before he finally decided to fill the quiet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What...what do we do now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It had been a long time since Teddy didn’t have a joke to lighten the mood. Somehow, that made everything so much worse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s the thing, Teddy,” her voice sounded, a lot more quiet and afraid than she had hoped, “We don’t know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, well--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-it’s gone now, but...but it’s--she’s still out there, and the others are too, and now we have n-no fucking idea how to kill these things and I---Teddy, I’m so scared.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Teddy climbed out of bed, placing both of his hands on her shoulders. For a moment, Ophelia was distracted from her fear by how simultaneously adorable and hot Teddy looked in his plaid flannel pajama pants that were just a bit too short for him. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. We’ll figure it all out. What do we do right now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As reassuring as he was trying to be, the terror in Teddy’s own voice began to come through. Still, Ophelia steadied herself and explained that they were all heading to the library to discuss and plan for whatever shit show they had ahead of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without missing a beat, Teddy slipped on a pair of shoes and nodded. When Ophelia didn’t move, Teddy turned to face her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m assuming you meant right now?” Ophelia rolled her eyes despite how helpless she felt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Teddy, “right now” means in two weeks at four-thirty. Yes, right now!” The blue-haired boy grinned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Got it. Let’s go.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Once Teddy and Ophelia had tiptoed out of the Hufflepuff dorms to rejoin the group for their early morning trip to the library everyone fell into an </span>
  <em>
    <span>extremely</span>
  </em>
  <span> awkward silence as they weaved their way through the halls. A part of Cas felt guilty. She knew that her friends were being so stoically cold towards Scorpius because they all knew she was head over heels for him, and he definitely wasn't. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The contrast to how the end of last year was to tonight seemed almost comical, she remembered how close they had all been. The train ride was full of light banter and knowing looks as inside jokes were brought up, now it was just awkward silence as everyone was stuck in their thoughts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Probably thinking of ways to discreetly murder Scorpius...or Cas and Ophelia for waking them up at one in the morning. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas knew that was wishful thinking.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas knew that the thoughts that were swirling around her companion's heads were probably much worse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas knew this because she too was reliving everything that had gone wrong last year and praying that nothing worse happens this time around. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Teddy sending death glares at the back of Scorpius’ blond head. Cas knew she was partly responsible for Scorpius’ actions. If she hadn’t thrown herself at Scorpius, if she hadn’t thought there was a possibility of something more between them, this never would have happened. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But no. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She let her emotions talk her into believing that Scorpius could like her back, and now he hated her, and her friends. This was why she was completely bewildered by the fact that Scorpius agreed to help them, was there a chance that he </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> hate her?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. </span>
  <em>
    <span>NO</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There is absolutely no room for thoughts like that, she reminded herself. The last time you allowed yourself to think like that you ruined everything. A new wave of sadness washed over her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why wasn’t she good enough for him? What was so amazing about </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dicky</span>
  </em>
  <span>? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, she had long, flowy, luscious locks of beautiful, blonde hair...and Cas definitely didn’t. Subconsciously, Cas ran a hand through her own short, choppy, red strands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And so what if she had captivating ice blue eyes and all Cas had were boring brown ones? That didn’t mean that Dicky was better than her…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas wished she could go back to being angry. Why couldn’t she go back to hating Scorpius? Now, for the first time ever, Cas felt a crushing sense of insecurity. She never focused </span>
  <em>
    <span>too</span>
  </em>
  <span> much on the way she looked, but now that’s all she could think about. This was even more disgusting to Cas because the world around her was in jeopardy but she was worried about why Scorpius Malfoy didn’t choose her. Every time she looked for that hot anger. The anger that empowered her to hex Scorpius, to stand up to him, all she found was a loss. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hated how much she missed the moments where Scorpius made her believe they could be something </span>
  <em>
    <span>more.</span>
  </em>
  <span> When he had shown up, not just for her, but for Al, Ophelia, even Teddy. She remembered how she had felt when he handed her his scarf, it was like her whole world had come into focus. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He showed his true colors. You need to move on, focus on saving your school. Your </span>
  <em>
    <span>home</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Your friends. The friends that didn’t abandon you and blatantly let some pretty blonde change them into an insensitive asshole. No matter how hard Cas drilled this into her head she could quiet the little voice that kept whispering, </span>
  <em>
    <span>he did come though</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He’s here, isn’t he</span>
  </em>
  <span>? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Cas’ mind came up with a response to the pestering voice she was pulled out of her thoughts by bumping into the back of Al. They were about to turn down the main corridor, making them a lot more susceptible to getting caught by Filch. Which was why, Cas guessed, Teddy had made the sudden stop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why’d we stop?” Cas asked, just to make sure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Well</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I figured we would all need to be on the same page if we’re going to </span>
  <em>
    <span>successfully </span>
  </em>
  <span>sneak into this library without getting caught,” Teddy whispered, Cas felt a surge of affection for her loudmouthed cousin. He looked so endearing in the oversized, purple sweater her father had gotten him for Christmas last year. The fact that he was here right now meant more to Cas than she would care to admit. “Don’t suppose you brought the invisibility cloak, Al?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A scoff slipped out of Scorpius’ lips, “You’d have to physically force me to get under the invisibility cloak with one of you, let alone </span>
  <em>
    <span>all </span>
  </em>
  <span>of you, </span>
  <em>
    <span>losers</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Another piece of Cas’ heart chipped away. They might be losers, but at least last year they were </span>
  <em>
    <span>his</span>
  </em>
  <span> losers. Last year </span>
  <em>
    <span>she</span>
  </em>
  <span> was his loser. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That can be arranged.” Teddy snarled back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al jumped in immediately, trying to brighten the mood. “I hate to agree with Scorpius, but I’m sorry, but there is no way I’m getting under the cloak with Cas’ bad breath </span>
  <em>
    <span>ever</span>
  </em>
  <span> again.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas chuckled at the memory, she had accused Ophelia of having bad breath, but it had backfired on her. Leading Ophelia, Al, and herself to get into an argument about when the most appropriate time to brush your teeth was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You brush your teeth </span>
  <em>
    <span>before</span>
  </em>
  <span> you go to bed. We were far from bedtime,” Everyone, minus Scorpius, laughed at Cas’ attempt to explain herself. “It wasn’t my fault!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I remember that.” Teddy jumped in.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God, Loudmouth, how long were you eavesdropping on us?” Ophelia joked as she poked him in the shoulder. Teddy shot a playful glare back at her, and was about to say an equally playful response but was cut off by Scorpius. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had his arms crossed over his chest and a cloudy scowl weighed down his features. “Damn, you guys really know how to make a guy feel welcome.” Everyone answered with quizzical looks, Cas’ heart sped up at just the sound of his voice. “I mean talking about inside jokes that I wasn’t there for really just screams: come risk your life with us, Scorpius!”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy scoffed, which caught Cas by surprise. He rarely scoffed, he normally was sarcastic but never scoffed. “Like you care.” Teddy shared an annoyed look with Ophelia, they were doing that more often, Cas noticed. “You don’t get to treat us like shit </span>
  <em>
    <span>and</span>
  </em>
  <span> be included in our inside jokes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow,” He ran a hand through his hair, his blank expression of annoyance never faltered. “Maybe I should just go then.” He turned to leave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And that was the moment Cas snapped. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking</span>
  </em>
  <span> Malfoy, you better stop walking this instant. Turn around and come back here.” She was surprised at how mad and certain her voice sounded. Which was impressive because Cas felt her knees shaking, her clenched fist trembled with the pent up emotion that was suddenly bubbling to the surface. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius looked taken aback but took a step towards them nonetheless. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are </span>
  <em>
    <span>going</span>
  </em>
  <span> to help us. You are</span>
  <em>
    <span> going</span>
  </em>
  <span> to stay because we need you. After </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> you put us through you do </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> have the right to demand normalcy. You’re “right” to our inside jokes, civility, and friendliness </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> went down the drain when you decided you were going to treat us like absolute </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Cas was doing her best to keep her voice level, but it was proving to be a lot more difficult than she expected.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C-Cas maybe you should--” Ophelia started. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I’m done with his” She jabbed a finger towards the frozen blond, “shit attitude, not like it was ever that great anyway. I don’t wanna die, and I know </span>
  <em>
    <span>your</span>
  </em>
  <span> sorry ass doesn’t want to die, so swallow your </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking</span>
  </em>
  <span> pride and stop whining like the little bitch you are.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Seriously</span>
  </em>
  <span> Cas, please--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy jumped in placing a hand on the brunette’s shoulder. “No, let her finish, please.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,</span>
  <em>
    <span> Loudmouth</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I was just suggesting that Cas saves this verbal ass whooping for a time when we </span>
  <em>
    <span>aren't</span>
  </em>
  <span> trying to break into a </span>
  <em>
    <span>closed</span>
  </em>
  <span> library in the middle of the goddamn night.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia’s right, we should go,” Al added, “Don’t worry Cas, you can continue this inside.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas maintained stony eye contact with Scorpius, “No need. I’ve said </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> I need to say to </span>
  <em>
    <span>Sunshine</span>
  </em>
  <span> over here.”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that the group, plus Scorpius, snuck into the library, making sure to stay under the cover of the shadows. They made their way to a small, round table cozily tucked into a corner in the library. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas folded her legs under herself as she settled into one of the large cushion chairs that surrounded the table, as Teddy turned on a lamp. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia cleared her throat, her steady, calm, blue gaze, and the feeling of Al’s hand cupping hers gave her a sense of false security. Her whole world was crumbling but at least she had her best friends reassuring eyes, and her cousins comforting warmth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, um, we all know why we’re here…” Ophelia started awkwardly, Cas knew she should probably help her but her mind was too busy going over what she had just said--no, yelled-- to Scorpius. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Teddy tentatively put his hand over the hand she was resting on the table, they shared a quick, blush filled, glance. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry, Phe, you don’t have to go over it again. You already said it twice, you don’t have to go for lucky number three.” Teddy started, “Just tell us what to do and we’ll do it. We all know you’re the brains here.” He said lightly, squeezing her hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas once again found herself trying to hold back a snicker in a less than ideal situation. There was much that was unsaid between the two, it was almost heartbreaking. </span>
</p><p><span>“Well, we need to figure out how to kill the four that </span><em><span>are</span></em><span> here, maybe if we kill the ones here the rest will stop. But, we need to figure out how to kill it, </span><em><span>really</span></em><span> kill it.”</span> <span>Ophelia started to chew on her lip, a nervous habit she had done so often tonight it had turned red. “Which is basically impossible because </span><em><span>last</span></em><span> time I thought I had figured it out, b-but I guess it wasn’t good enough. Which means I have to start from scratch, with a huge pile of nothing, and the whole school’s safety on our--on m-my shoulders.” </span></p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Phelia,” Cas took her by the shoulders, “Phelia, stop. You’re not alone, we’re all in this together. We’ll get through this </span>
  <em>
    <span>together</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A murmur of agreements made their way around the table, even Scorpius offered a quick nod. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, but before we throw ourselves into </span>
  <em>
    <span>super </span>
  </em>
  <span>exciting research,” Al interrupted softly. “I have one condition.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas squeezed his hand, she could tell by the tight expression on his face that he was worried, </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> worried. “Anything, Al.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> absolutely </span>
  <em>
    <span>can not</span>
  </em>
  <span> bring my parents into this mess,” He twisted his fingers and took a shaky breath before continuing. “M-my dad, he still has nightmares, I’ll wake up to his sh-shrieks, these </span>
  <em>
    <span>horrid</span>
  </em>
  <span> shrieks. It sometimes takes my mom hours to calm him down. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> put him through that again.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A sad silence followed Al’s initial statement before someone else spoke up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t even remember my parents,” Teddy spoke quietly, but steady. “Bill and Fleur gave me a second chance, there is </span>
  <em>
    <span>no way</span>
  </em>
  <span> I can compromise them. Th-they gave me a home when I was just a broken little boy, I need to protect them at all costs.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’ heart broke for her cousins, and from the looks of it, Ophelia's did too. She was clinging to Teddy like she was just as broken as he was. Another part of Cas’ heart chipped at the thought of all the pain her friends were in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia spoke next. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My mom is sent right back to that, damp, dark, </span>
  <em>
    <span>small</span>
  </em>
  <span> dungeon every time she’s in a small, closed room. She can’t escape the flashbacks...or the claustrophobia. Pulling her back into a situation where she would be transported into her old fears, I-I just can’t do that. She so,</span>
  <em>
    <span> so</span>
  </em>
  <span> strong. But, but not </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> strong.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fred and George Weasley, never one without the other, a dynamic duo, and an unstoppable team. The war took my dad’s other half, his brother, his </span>
  <em>
    <span>best friend</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He can’t know there is a possibility of losing...losing me too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We won’t let that happen,” Al spoke up. Everybody seemed to have become very interested in their hands, their heads were hung as they all accepted what they were about to do. Cas’ pulse jumped when she heard a cool, calm voice. A voice that she didn’t expect to hear for the rest of the night. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My dad still hasn’t forgiven himself.” Scorpius didn’t meet anyone’s eye. “I don’t think he ever will. He lost so much to the war, and he sacrificed a part of himself that he never should have been asked to lose. The guilt keeps him up at night and wakes him up in cold sweats. If I’m going to do this, he can’t know. He shouldn’t have to suffer through anything like that again.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nobody should,” Cas whispered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia placed her hand in the middle of the table. “So we make a pact.” Everyone followed suit, Cas' hand sparked when she felt Scorpius’ smooth palm pressed against the back of her warm fingers.  “They fought and suffered once already. It’s our turn now. It’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>our</span>
  </em>
  <span> school. So, we keep them out of this, we’ll figure this out on our own, not because we wanna be heroes, and certainly not because we want to risk our lives...again, because we </span>
  <em>
    <span>have</span>
  </em>
  <span> to. This team, this group, no one else.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This team, this group, no one else.” They echoed solemnly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a few moments of silence, Al spoke up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, when’s our next heist to the restricted section?” Cas surprisingly found a laugh bubbling out of her, and was pleasantly surprised to find the rest of them following her lead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I like the way you think, Albus.” Ophelia grinned, tiredly, “We’ve got a lot of work ahead of us.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius let his head fall with a dull </span>
  <em>
    <span>thud </span>
  </em>
  <span>to rest on the cool stone wall behind him. He inhaled deeply as Tori continued trailing her hands up his torso and tried not to look as uncomfortably indifferent as he felt. Bringing his hands reflexively to rest on his girlfriend’s waist, relief washing over him when he saw her smile. The indication that he was doing what was supposed to be done allowed him to retreat into his thoughts, as he did many a time when in these types of situations. Especially with her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius closed his eyes as Tori eventually brought her lips to his, glad that his total numbness was passing as pleasure once again. Bringing his right hand to rest in the crook of her neck, he tried to let himself relax; focusing on the texture of the stone to his back, or the stiff feeling of Tori’s collar between his fingers, </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything </span>
  </em>
  <span>but being here---doing </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>with </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Soon enough, the familiar feeling of nothingness washed over him, plunging into the dark emptiness of his own mind and allowing him to forget, only if just for a moment, what he was doing. And why. And with who.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Th-the situation?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“If I hated you, I’d have more control over the situation. If I convinced myself I hated you, if I convinced myself you were worth hating, then I could have more control over my...my feelings.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius tried not to let himself give anything away, tried to stop the shudder of guilt from coursing through his body and alerting Tori that something wasn’t normal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then again, it never had been.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt even more torturous when he let his mind wander like this, replaying his and Cas’s final conversation as...as friends together. He tried to bury it most days, building mental brick walls of insults and excuses for what he had done. Every now and then, though--well, who was he kidding, </span>
  <em>
    <span>all the fucking time, </span>
  </em>
  <span>a small moment would slip through the cracks, pushing the knife of guilt and hatred toward himself further into his heart and making it even harder to breath. Scorpius remembered with uncomfortable ease how it had felt almost the same whenever he was around Cas, laughing with her, just being with her...the slightly uncomfortable pressure in his chest reminding him of everything ahead of them and the possibilities that lay unspoken between them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now though, the feeling was less a happy indication that he was alive and why, but a constant reminder of the fact that he had </span>
  <em>
    <span>made</span>
  </em>
  <span> himself hateable, that none of them had to pretend anymore, that whatever Cas’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>feelings </span>
  </em>
  <span>were had been wiped away. The pain would grow more uncomfortable the longer he let himself focus on it, almost hoping it would allow him to </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel something</span>
  </em>
  <span>, or think of something else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Usually, though, it led him to thinking of someone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How he had been </span>
  <em>
    <span>so close </span>
  </em>
  <span>to not screwing things up, </span>
  <em>
    <span>so close</span>
  </em>
  <span> to hearing the words he had held his breath for the entire year, </span>
  <em>
    <span>so close</span>
  </em>
  <span> to being able to do </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>with </span>
  <em>
    <span>her.</span>
  </em>
  <span> His mind swerved uncomfortably without his permission, making the pit in his stomach grow ever larger and his entire being tense up as ideas of Cas trickled into his mind. He let himself, just for a second, imagine what it would feel like if he were running his hands through choppy red locks instead of long blonde ones, staring into deep brown eyes instead of cold blue ones. He wondered how he would feel. How he’d actually be able to think, to focus on the present moment instead of retreating into himself--he’d actually want to be there. He’d actually be happy, be in love---</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He lost it. The thoughts all disappeared, hiding somewhere where Scorpius hoped he would never have to find them. His newly refocused consciousness shocked him back into his own skin. He was back to the stone, back to her collar, back to Tori. It was only then when he felt the throbbing pain in the back of his head, alerting him that he had physically jumped back, slamming into the wall of this side corridor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. He had to quit it, and</span>
  <em>
    <span> now.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He didn’t love her, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>--he loved Tori, the girl in front of him, the one he could never say no to, the one he had just been kissing. He loved </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s wrong, boo?” Her voice sounded, the sickeningly sweet noise making its way to his ears and forcing him to make eye contact. “Are you okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yeah,” Scorpius rubbed his head, trying to use it as a distraction, leaning into the pain so he could ignore the pricking of tears at the corner of his eyes. Swallowing quickly and tamping down his emotions, he smiled down at the girl before him. “Fine, really, it’s just...we should probably get to class. I mean, we’re already late.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had the audacity to laugh. He hated that she thought he had wanted to be the cause of it. “Since when have you ever cared about going to class?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Since we’re N.E.W.T students now--I don’t know about you, Tori, but I’m hoping for a job once we get out of here.” He tried his absolute best to twist his tone, make it sound like a joke, keep his mask up for just a little bit longer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s what all this was, anyway. A mask. Every word, every snide remark, every hug and kiss with Tori was a step further away from Cas, from the intrusive thoughts that he couldn’t stop from getting to him every night that told every fiber of his being to stop. He had done this, he had brought this upon himself, he deserved the numbness, the agonizing pain of </span>
  <em>
    <span>nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span> that followed him every moment of every day. He deserved it for everything he had ruined--for what he had done to Cas. If this was what had to happen to keep up the charade, to bury the feelings six feet under and pretend they weren’t there until it wasn’t pretend anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was his grave--he had dug it. Now, it was his to die in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh,” she giggled softly again, “Okay. Whatever you say, boo. If you want to, we can go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yes, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright then.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They slipped out of the dim corridor, strolling as nonchalantly as they could to class. As Tori caught up to her friends, Scorpius sped up his gate, discreetly putting distance between them. He continued heading to the Potions classroom, suddenly aware of the fact he could breathe again, and afraid of the fact that it would all be taken away again once he entered the room and saw the familiar features that reminded him of everything he had to lose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything he had already lost.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Forcing open the heavy doors, Scorpius traipsed to his seat, putting on an air of confidence while still avoiding eye contact with everyone in the room. Settling into his seat, Scorpius allowed himself a quick glance to Al, his heart hardening even more as he found the boy determinedly focusing on his work. He knew Scorpius was looking at him, waiting for anything, but he wasn’t going to give it to him. At that moment, Scorpius would’ve given anything to be partnered with the spastic and cheerful friend he had once had, the one who begged him to be partners in the first place, the one who said they were best friends. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The person who made him believe that was even possible.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius found a tree outside of the window to focus on, letting Al continue his work, knowing that he wasn’t expected to help at this point.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Like anyone wanted him to anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He let the lesson drone on, listening to the faded sound of Professor Slughorn’s voice drone on and continuing to find idle ways to distract himself. Now and again, when he wasn’t focusing so hard on not focusing, his gaze would drift to Al. Every time, though, he’d find him facing another direction, talking to someone else, or adding ingredients to their potion of the day. He caught Tori’s eye a couple of times, offering smiles and waves despite the action draining his lungs of air and making him wish even more urgently that he could be alone. Or outside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Anywhere but here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Twirling a quill between his fingers, Scorpius heard a musical laugh echo around the room. Preparing himself mentally for another teeth-rotting smile at Tori, he glanced up---</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And found himself staring at Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It had been an accident, of course. Or, at least, that’s what thought Scorpius allowed to bounce around his mind as he tried so hard to rip his eyes away from her bright eyes and smiling face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, maybe he wasn’t trying that hard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He watched her throw her head back, leaning on Ophelia’s shoulder as the brunette smiled smugly at Cas’s amusement. He watched her vivid hair whip back and forth, again burying the incessant want to run his fingers through it. Her eyes lit up as she laughed, making her look happier than he had seen her all year.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Scorpius had the acute feeling that he was intruding on something he shouldn’t be seeing. Why should </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Scorpius, even be allowed this close to Cas after everything he had done. He hadn’t done anything to deserve that--</span>
  <em>
    <span>quite </span>
  </em>
  <span>the opposite actually.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shaking away the thoughts that plagued him more and more by the second, Scorpius tore his eyes away and back to Al for a change.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al, who for once, was making direct eye contact with him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Making Scorpius very, very uncomfortable.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Like that was anything new.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Didn’t your mother ever tell you it wasn’t polite to stare?” The familiar comment held a bit more bite than it had before, but if he was honest, Scorpius didn’t care. He was just beyond happy that someone was talking to him again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Besides Vick---Tori, of course.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My mother’s dead.” Scorpius tried to hide the smile tugging aggressively at the corners of his mouth. It felt so natural, so real, that Scorpius almost believed it was all going to be okay.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he and everyone around him knew it was much too late for that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The classroom shifted back into silence, making Scorpius long even more for something from anyone. He just needed to hear his friends’ voices.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“S-so, uh...how’s Jonah?” Scorpius tested the waters, his voice shaking a lot more than he would’ve liked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Great. Just fucking great. Who was he to think he would actually get an answer?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, he couldn’t help his heart from wanting it. He couldn’t help but try.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al?” he pressed softly. Still, nothing. It wasn’t like Al hadn’t heard him--the boy was less than three feet away. Why wouldn’t he just fucking answer?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why wouldn’t anyone answer? Why couldn’t any of them see that he was trying, that there was a reason he was the way he was, that he was trying to fix it--no matter how much shit he had to endure, he was still there, wasn’t he? If they’d just listen, he’d explain. But no. Of course, a simple answer to an attempt at small talk was too much for Al’s pride.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you deaf? I just asked a question, Albus.” The green-eyed boy whipped his head up faster than Scorpius had expected. He could feel several gazes on him, and he would’ve bet his life that two of them were Ophelia and Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh no, I heard you.” Al spat quietly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, he was in it now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then why can’t I ask my Potions partner a simple question without being blatantly ignored? I would hope--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You lost that privilege the moment you kicked us all to the curb, the moment you broke everything we had tried to fix all of last year!” His voice was getting louder, and where Scorpius would’ve once been slightly embarrassed, he now had absolutely no reason to care. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you kidding? I didn’t do anything to</span>
  <em>
    <span> you</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Al scoffed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, you sure as hell did something to my friends--my family! Oh, wait, they used to be your friends too...or do you conveniently forget that as well?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius took in his former best friend: Eyes deeper and darker and angrier than he had ever seen them, the once gentle and quiet boy positively furious at him. His dark hair stuck out at odd angles and his eyebrows were furrowed, making him quite a scary sight to behold.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now he understood why his father had never been able to beat Harry Potter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever,” Scorpius propelled himself upwards, forcing himself up to stand, preparing to walk away. “I’m done talking to you anyway--”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I just ask you one question?” Al pulled himself into a standing position as well, his chair screeching loudly from the force. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Why?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why’d you do it? Why’d you ruin everything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius shrugged as casually as he could. “I dunno---I guess people change. Some of us move on. Maybe you should try it sometime.” Grabbing his book bag, Scorpius slung it roughly around his shoulder and walked briskly for the door, ignoring Professor Slughorn’s protests. As he reached the doorway, Scorpius heard the movement of chairs behind him and caught the whispering of a familiar voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al, are you okay?’ Cas asked. The sound, that soft and gentle voice was so horribly familiar, igniting a fire inside of Scorpius’s chest and making him want to walk up to her and kiss her or run far, far away. He wouldn’t have to decide, luckily, since the sneer and snide remark that came from him replaced his thoughts like the choreography of a dance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Anne of Green Gables, I guess you wouldn’t know what it’s like to burst out and disrupt class--” he painted his words into sarcastic sincerity, which was all the worse than actually meaning it, and continued after a dramatic pause, “Oh...oh wait, you would, because---well, you got detention twice!” He chose this moment to turn to Al, smiling malevolently as he carried on. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Twice</span>
  </em>
  <span>, right? It was twice?” Cas laughed emotionlessly, turning to Scorpius. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t look.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t look.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t look.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tried to ignore how good it felt to hear her laugh, even if she didn’t mean it, even if she hated him. How good it felt to see her, be around her. The butterflies attacking his stomach spurred him on. “What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas smiled, making a point to be as fake as possible, before speaking. “Oh, I just wanted to comment on how original that insult was! Really clever--almost like you’ve used it before...oh, I forgot. You must put as much effort into your insults as you do your friendships. Got it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius tried not to let the comments hurt. If it had been anyone else, Ophelia, even Al, he could’ve taken it. He had enough pride in himself to walk away, to let himself win. But with her...it was different. Even if answering would only make her angrier, make her respond with more insults that cut deeper than he’d like to admit, it would be worth it. Just to hear, see, </span>
  <em>
    <span>be around</span>
  </em>
  <span> Cas. The memories of the week before raced back to him. He remembered the fight with painful accuracy, giving him the perfect ammunition.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, because you would know, Miss--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know what? I’m done wasting my time on you, Scorpius.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Enough!” Slughorn’s voice rang out. Turning to look at him, he spared his teacher a semi-apologetic glance before turning back to Cas. Holding eye contact for a second too long, Scorpius turned on his heel and sped out of the classroom, allowing the doors to slam heavily behind him. Exhaling as they closed, Scorpius tried to take deep breaths, slow down his heartbeat, to </span>
  <em>
    <span>forget.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m done wasting my time on you, Scorpius.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The words alone were enough to almost push him to swallow his pride and apologize. His ego had been publicly destroyed already---not that he cared at this point, but it mattered even less now. All that mattered now was that Scorpius had to make a choice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fix things, or forget. Put more distance between him and them, until he didn’t feel obligated to laugh at Teddy’s jokes, didn’t feel anything when Cas even so much as looked his way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whatever he decided, it was going to have to be </span>
  <em>
    <span>soon</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The current situation with his former friend group and Tori was bad enough, but they still had much much bigger problems.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And those were even more dangerous thoughts to have.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wished he could stop thinking for a second. Maybe longer. The only place he could escape was in sleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was tired of living like this. He couldn’t do it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to make a decision, and fast. No matter how hard it was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius walked numbly to the Slytherin common room, collapsing onto a sofa and turning onto his back to stare at the ceiling. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What the hell was he supposed to do now?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt like only a few seconds had passed when Scorpius heard someone else enter the common room. The sound was jarring because it meant that classes were out for the day. If he was honest, Scorpius absolutely did not plan on going to dinner. Facing people really didn’t sound good right now, and sitting at the same table as Al sounded even worse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, it seemed like there was no escaping confrontation when the boy himself made his way into the common room. Scorpius closed his eyes, taking deep breaths and hoping against hope that Al would pass without saying anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He should’ve known, of course, that he was never that lucky. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al quickly jogged up the stairs to the boys’ shared dorm, coming back down around ten minutes later and headed for the door. However, when he laid eyes on Scorpius for a second time, he stopped in his tracks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Sunshine, </span>
  </em>
  <span>coming to dinner? Won’t your little girlfriend throw a fit if she doesn’t have an arm to cling onto?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The small jab was enough to set Scorpius off. Sitting up, he somehow found the courage to stare Al directly in the eyes. “You don’t know the half of what's going on with me right now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The green-eyed boy raised an emotionless eyebrow. “Oh, because your life must be</span>
  <em>
    <span> so hard</span>
  </em>
  <span> right now--I mean, really--a “perfect” girlfriend, perfect grades, new perfect friends...yeah, you really seem like you’re having a tough time.” Scorpius sighed, trying to tamp down the emotion in his eyes, ignoring how choked up he felt, just to pretend none of it was there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, so it </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> Al now? No “Albus”? Just want to make sure we’re on the same page, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Sunshine</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius turned away from Al, furiously wiping at his suddenly tear-filled eyes. “Just leave me alone, Al. I wouldn’t want your dinner to get cold.” The comment came out a lot more hurt than he had hoped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With no further reply, Al turned on his heel and stormed out of the room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Numbly, Scorpius climbed the stairs to his and Al’s shared dorm, slamming the door behind him and surveying the empty room. Despite being back for almost two weeks at this point, Hogwarts still had yet to feel like home. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was just beginning to understand why. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taking a shaky breath, Scorpius walked straight over to the corner shelves, pulling a leatherbound book of blank pages out of the stack and opening it to an empty page. Pulling out a piece of charcoal he had stashed in his book bag, Scorpius sat down on his bed and began to sketch: blending the coarse black powder in many directions, creating silhouettes and shapes, and trying his hardest to focus on only that. After several minutes, when his hand began to cramp, Scorpius looked down at his work-in-progress.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a silhouette of two people, Scorpius imagined them as a couple, dancing together on a background of blank parchment, surrounded by a few willowy trees. The male figure had an arm outstretched, clearly twirling the other figure. Scorpius frowned and moved his charcoal nib back to the twirling girl, lengthening her thick strands of hair and trying to pretend that he’d drawn them choppy and short as an accident. If he just added a bit here and there…it looked a lot like Tori.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>But it hadn’t started out that way, </span>
  </em>
  <span>his mind chided him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Groaning in frustration, Scorpius decided to take his anger out on the new piece of artwork, ripping it forcefully out of the book and throwing it, crumpled to the floor. Smoothing out a new page of parchment, Scorpius lifted his bit of charcoal yet again and readjusted his position on the bed…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Coming to land on a piece of soft fabric. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Standing up in confusion, Scorpius looked down and tried to find what he had sat on when he had moved. His eyes caught a piece of green and silver-grey striped fabric lying neatly folded on his bed. It could’ve passed for anything, but upon closer inspection, he could tell it was a scarf. As his stomach dropped, Scorpius noticed a small piece of torn parchment peeking out of the folds. Tugging at it, he pulled free a note written in ink:</span>
</p><p><em><span>Hi, Boo!</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>I noticed at the beginning of the year that you didn’t have a Slytherin scarf, so I figured I would get you one! Hope you like it!</span></em></p><p>
  <em>
    <span>XOXO,</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Tori</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius didn’t notice he had dropped everything in his hands until he, too, landed on the floor. His head banged uncomfortably on the four-poster bed, but Scorpius barely felt it. He couldn’t see, couldn’t hear, couldn’t speak, couldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>breathe</span>
  </em>
  <span>, could barely feel…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, all he could do was think.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thoughts came faster than they ever had before, tearing down the mental barricades from every painful angle, tearing away his excuses and his mask and leaving him bare, nothing to protect him from the painful images that had been there all along. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Your perfect girlfriend--</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He could feel the vibrations of Al’s bitter voice echo around his mind, pulling towards him all the images, thoughts, and feelings that always came with kissing Tori. The guilt, the shame, the paralyzing fear of being caught there, with her, in a position he should have no problem being caught in. Still, every time they parted, and even now, Scorpius could feel the sickening feeling pouring over him, making him want to throw up, or punch something, or cry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, he was already crying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tears fell down his face, and fast, making his eyes hurt. He hated the salty taste on his lips, the way the sobs made his throat burn, the way they racked his body, the way they brought him all the way back to the Hospital Wing, to Teddy writhing and screaming in pain, to the feeling of the drugs clouding his mind and plunging him into a place that he couldn’t control.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He needed control.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he was too far gone now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The nightmarish thoughts took him back even further, to the physical and mental pain of fighting Nagini, to doing the best he could but getting no result, to seeing Cas knee-deep in the oil that almost took everything away from them--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Away from him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could see her face so clearly, smiling and laughing in class just hours earlier, bright and cheery and shoving Scorpius deeper and deeper into the hole he had fallen into. He could hear her laugh, see her bright eyes, and feel the guilt of intruding on a moment that wasn’t his to be a part of. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Was never his to have again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even after class, after all this time, Scorpius could still feel the twisting pain just as fresh as when he knew he would never make her laugh like that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe ever again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, the thoughts changed directions, throwing at him every single time he had ever hurt her, throwing her hurt expressions and insults and tears at him like knives, reminding him of everything he had wanted to forget.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was drowning.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Your perfect grades---</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Al’s voice was back, but Scorpius saw himself now, struggling over his Transfiguration homework, struggling to catch up on everything he had already missed this year...academic or not. It was because of her, he tried to rationalize, Tori was the one forcing him away from class and pulling him out of the running for achievement.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the thoughts knew that was a lie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And deep down, so did he. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was his fault. It was all his fault. There was no more hiding from it--he had something good for once and all he could do was go and screw it up. At school, with Cas, with--</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Your new “perfect” friends--</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Al’s angry voice cut him off again, reminding him of what he had already been thinking:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas wasn’t the only person he had hurt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tried to look away as visions of Al came into view, pushing and pulling him in every direction. He could see them together in the common room, getting closer and talking about god knows what, laughing at dinner, working in Potions...he could see the night Al came out to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But just as quickly as they had appeared, the warm, comforting thoughts were replaced by darker ones, showing him Al’s anger and disappointment in him after Tori, after what he had done to Cas, after everything that had happened last year was erased with four simple words.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The truce is off.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His mind painted him painful pictures of Ophelia and Teddy glaring at him from across the Great Hall, soundly abusing him and Tori at the Gryffindor table, of every time Teddy had mockingly called him “Sunshine”, all the happiness and friendliness gone from his voice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Soon enough, he could hear them too. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Well, last I checked, you were ready to die for this group of “losers” last year.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Because, you complete and utter piece of shit. We’ve been at school for a night and you’ve already treated us like the dirt on the bottom of your overly priced shoe, we. Still. Need. You. At one point you were part of our team, and we made a pretty damn good one, and we still barely survived. So holy fuck, Scorpius, just say you’ll help us. You don’t have to like it and you won’t have to interact with us “losers” otherwise.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Like you care.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>"After everything you put us through you do not have the right to demand normalcy. You’re “right” to our inside jokes, civility, and friendliness all went down the drain when you decided you were going to treat us like absolute shit.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And it was true. All of it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t deserve their friendship. They hated him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hated himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Scorpius couldn’t breathe. The air disappeared from his lungs as if taken by magic. His world was crumbling around him, the walls were closing in. He didn’t have anything. He didn’t deserve anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He couldn’t breathe.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His heart sped up, slowed down, sped up again, blood pumping through his body trying to compensate for the lack of air. Scorpius could hear himself taking shaky breaths in and out, punctuated by sobs, but none of it seemed to be reaching him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Did he really want it to?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The feeling began to filter back into his body as Scorpius registered that he was being shaken softly. Tearing through the darkness, Scorpius looked up through tears to see none other than Al crouching down in front of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somehow, the sight of his former best friend staring down at him like this was even worse than being alone. He did the first thing that came to mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He punched. He flailed as much as he could, not caring about hitting hard, just trying to get Al away from him. To stop touching him. To leave him alone, like this, like he deserved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius, stop!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Al gripped his shoulders tightly, trying to stop the motion, but Scorpius wouldn’t give in.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Let me go.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Let me go.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“</span>
  </em>
  <span>Let me go!</span>
  <em>
    <span>” </span>
  </em>
  <span>he heard himself sob, as if from far away. “Leave m-me </span>
  <em>
    <span>alone</span>
  </em>
  <span>!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al did the exact opposite. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wrapping his arms around Scorpius, he pulled the blond close and held tight. Scorpius shook with sobs and protest, trying to pull himself away...if he could only </span>
  <em>
    <span>get away--</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius, it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Al soothed. Scorpius tried to ignore how safe he felt as Al softly rubbed a hand up and down his back. “It’s going to be okay...I promise.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius gave up the fight. He leaned into Al, searching for </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> to grab onto and settling for the back of Al’s robes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he sobbed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He sobbed until he couldn’t sob any more until all the tears had left him and the breath had returned and he could </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel </span>
  </em>
  <span>again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, Al let go when he pulled away. They sat there in silence, both looking anywhere but at each other. After what could’ve been hours, Scorpius looked up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why’d you do that?” His voice was hoarse from all the crying.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why didn’t you just leave me to suffer? Since...you hate me anyway.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al sighed. “Scorpius...even after everything, you were still my best friend. That loyalty, those feelings aren’t ones you can turn off, even though you did, I guess. I can’t.” He looked away again, moving to stand and walk away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“None of us can.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius sat there for a long time after Al had left, buried in thoughts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, he could control them this time. Even after the moon was up and the sun had disappeared, he still stayed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t like he needed to, though.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It had taken him barely any time to make his decision. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to fix this. He had to, while there was a chance he still could.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was going to fix this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At least, he had to try.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Teddy combed his shaky fingers through his hair, </span>
  <em>
    <span>again</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He couldn’t believe they were doing this,</span>
  <em>
    <span> again</span>
  </em>
  <span>. They barely made it away from Nagini alive, he had come so close to losing everything, his life for starters, not to mention his friends--his </span>
  <em>
    <span>family</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s what Ophelia had called them. He didn’t think it was possible to hate a word as much as he did when he heard her call them </span>
  <em>
    <span>family</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Whatever, Teddy shook thoughts of Ophelia away, like always, he could get lost in the sea of thoughts that his mind dedicated to Ophelia Lovegood. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the Infirmary he had felt like he finally had friends at Hogwarts, </span>
  <em>
    <span>real</span>
  </em>
  <span> friends, for once. A wave of bitterness crashed over his heart as memories of Scorpius’ and his conversation from inside the Infirmary came rushing back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>How could he just forget that? How could they be writing letters for over </span>
  <em>
    <span>half</span>
  </em>
  <span> of summer and it all just </span>
  <em>
    <span>stop</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Was their friendship something Teddy had just imagined? It was really hard to admit, but he </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> missed Scorpius. Teddy didn’t have many friends he trusted and Scorpius had quickly hopped to the top of his list, and then the next moment later his trust was being ripped to shreds by his comments and condescending looks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew he should just let it go. It would be easier to just move on and focus on the friends he </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> have. Focus on trying to not mess up whatever he had with Ophelia, but Scorpius had understood him, or at least Teddy thought he had. Every time Scorpius looked at him with his cold green eyes Teddy was torn between crying and punching the bastard in his annoyingly symmetrical face. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Asshole</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Who gave him the right to make Teddy trust him and then spit that trust in his eye? Teddy pulled himself out of his thoughts when he felt his fingernails digging into his palms, he finally understood why Cas got angry at Scorpius at the tip of a hat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was so much easier to get angry at him then realize how much you lost when he decides to turn his back on you. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy hated to admit how much he missed their friendship. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was surprised to see only Cas waiting in the corridor where they had agreed to meet, Ophelia thought it was better for all of them to sneak in together all at once, then coming at different times. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, mini Weasley,” Cas looked up. “Uh, where’s everyone else?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She laughed and looked up at him through untamable strands of red hair. “Real subtle Lupin. Don’t worry </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ophelia</span>
  </em>
  <span> was gonna come down after me, she was just finishing up some homework.” Teddy smiled fondly, of course, she was. He chose to ignore the way Cas had said Ophelia’s name like she knew exactly what he was thinking. Just because Teddy had no idea what he was doing, didn’t mean that his annoyingly observant cousin did. “The others are just late, I guess.” She shrugged. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy laughed as he took in his cousin's appearance, she sported plaid pajama pants that were </span>
  <em>
    <span>way</span>
  </em>
  <span> too big for her and the same purple hoodie he had gotten for Christmas last year. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nice outfit, Cas.” She looked like she had literally just rolled out of bed, in her defense it </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> almost midnight, but Teddy couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tease her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y’know what? Just because you decided you wanted to wear jeans to an </span>
  <em>
    <span>empty</span>
  </em>
  <span> library at </span>
  <em>
    <span>night</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Does not mean </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> have to.” Teddy laughed at his eccentric cousin, why Scorpius would choose a basic blonde over his enigmatic cousin was beyond him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever you say.” Teddy’s heart picked up when his ears caught the sound of footsteps around the corner. Still, he tried not to focus on her, focus on her like he </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span> did. “Just don’t feel left out when all of us show up in </span>
  <em>
    <span>normal</span>
  </em>
  <span> people clothes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry I won’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s when Ophelia Lovegood rounded the corner, a buzz of nerves and excitement ran through his body down to the tip of his fingers and toes. It was a feeling his body had reserved for Ophelia only, at this point he didn’t care if she liked him back, he just wanted to be close to her. Around her, even if it was just supporting her through friendship. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then he actually took her in, and all those feelings of contentedness in “friendship” evaporated. Every. Single. Damn. Time. He saw her breathtaking features adorned with intelligent eyes and a mouth that delivered witty replies at a moment's notice, he just fell even harder. As she got closer the buzzing intensified, it was like a hundred bees were exploring the inside of his stomach, he hated and loved it at the same time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Half of her dark, chestnut hair was pulled back away from her face in long flowy waves, she had never done that with her hair before. His breathing hitched, even in jeans and a simple shirt, she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We ready to get this party started?” Ophelia stage-whispered, once she got closer she continued. “A-and by party I mean, break into the library.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for clarifying, Phelia.” Cas rolled her eyes fondly at her best friend. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anyti--Are you wearing </span>
  <em>
    <span>pajamas</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy snorted, trying to remember how to speak. “Yes, yes she is.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why?” Ophelia asked incredulously. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Because</span>
  </em>
  <span> they’re way more comfortable and if I’ ma break into a library I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>doing it in </span>
  <em>
    <span>jeans</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you have against jeans?” Teddy pressed, joking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing! Jeans are great.” Cas put her hands up defensively. “I’m just saying, pajama pants are way more appropriate for this situation.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia rolled her blue eyes, even in the dim light they sparkled. “That literally makes </span>
  <em>
    <span>zero</span>
  </em>
  <span> sense.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever, if you were smart you would’ve worn pajamas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The brunette threw her head back in laughter at his cousin’s ridiculousness, “Cas, I can </span>
  <em>
    <span>assure</span>
  </em>
  <span> you nobody else would even think to come in pajamas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just moments after the sentence left Ophelia’s mouth Cas’ face lit up triumphantly as she vigorously pointed at the pair of Slytherins that had just rounded the corner. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ha! I told you!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy sighed, Al was walking down the corridor sporting the exact same pair of pants as Cas only in green and silver instead of red and gold. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pajama pants are the way to go.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once Al and Scorpius got closer Al spoke up. “Do I even wanna know?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas grinned as they high fived and Teddy’s stomach flipped as Ophelia and he shared an exasperated look at Cas’ antics. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doesn’t matter, all that matters is, great minds think alike.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Or stupid ones</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Scorpius mumbled just loud enough for everyone to hear, Teddy braced himself for a Cas outbreak and tried to reel in his own thoughts of anger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“K,” But apparently the redhead was too happy about her win on the subject of pajama pants to let Scorpius’ comment hurt her. “Gonna ignore that unnecessary comment and break into a library instead.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was then that Teddy realized that Al and Scorpius had walked over together, meaning that Scorpius wasn’t coming from somewhere with Dicky and was probably with Al instead. Why was Al hanging out with Scorpius again? After everything he did, everything he ruined, everybody he </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurt</span>
  </em>
  <span>? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As they all snuck silently into the library Teddy fell into step with Al at the back of the group. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Since when are you and Scorpius all chummy again?” Teddy whispered, making sure nobody could hear him but the Potter next to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He immediately looked </span>
  <em>
    <span>extremely </span>
  </em>
  <span>uncomfortable, “I wouldn’t say we’re ‘chummy’” When all he got for a response was a raised eyebrow he continued with uncertainty, “I’d just say we aren’t going out of our way to make </span>
  <em>
    <span>each other...</span>
  </em>
  <span>chum?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For some reason, Teddy felt betrayed. How come Al gets to be okay, and not him? How come Scorpius was so intent on being less of a douchebag to Al? Teddy thought he was important to Scorpius too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But of course, Teddy didn’t vocalize any of the hundreds of the questions that were pounding at his head, no, instead he just asked: </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Since when?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“S-Since when?” Al repeated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s what I said.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh...since--uh…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy felt his eyebrows raise, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Al</span>
  </em>
  <span>, what happened?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In hushed tones, Al quickly recounted an unbelievable story about a particular Potter walking in on a particular Malfoy boy in the middle of what appeared to be a meltdown/kinda panic attack. Which was why Al had decided he was going to go “easy on him,” but “in no way means that I forgive him.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy was saved from responding by the sound of an annoyed Ophelia Lovegood approaching the pair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, so now that I’ve broken into Madam Pince’s desk </span>
  <em>
    <span>and</span>
  </em>
  <span> set out every book on Horcruxes from the restricted section, would you two </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> start helping? Y’know, instead of huddling over here in the corner gossiping like a couple of ten-year-old girls.”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, what the hell am I and the blond asshole?” Cas whispered as she and Scorpius headed back over towards Teddy and Al. “We were there carrying those heavy dust collectors right there next to you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not the point I was trying to make, but yes, thank you Cas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The redhead nodded, “You’re very welcome, Phelia.” The comment dripped in sarcasm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, okay,” Al interrupted. “Let’s just get to work.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everybody nodded reluctantly and headed over to a table in the corner, once again the light from the lamp was the only light that illuminated the spacious library. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy sat across from Ophelia in one of the cushioned chairs and dramatically pulled one of the thick volumes towards him, sighing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> hate reading,” Teddy complained and much to his delight Ophelia laughed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I noticed, Loudmouth.” She flipped open to a random page, the others did the same, “Just keep an eye out for anything that might help us figure out how to kill these things.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence fell over the group, all that Teddy could hear was Ophelia rummaging in her bag, Teddy gladly took that as an excuse to stop reading. He watched in interest as she pulled out a small box. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy’s heart pounded against his chest when Ophelia slipped on a pair of glasses, and like she could feel his gaze on her she looked up and met his eyes. A spark pulsed down his body at the eye contact, as she peered through the lenses that were perched on her nose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was the most adorable thing Teddy had ever seen, and judging by the way his stomach was flipping, his body agreed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were a thin, dark grey frame, her blue eyes were clear and bright and the round shape complimented her face spectacularly. She bit her lip nervously, still holding eye contact, as she tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>God, she was perfect. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy didn’t even know how to comprehend the feelings that were flowing through his body, his mind was cloudy and all he could see was Ophelia. Ophelia and her complex personality that always kept Teddy on his toes, Ophelia Lovegood who was sitting across the table, peering at him through the cutest glasses he had ever seen. Completely unaware that she was the only person who made his heart pound the way it was right now. The only person that made him feel like his stomach had just dropped to the center of the Earth, like the way it was right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was the only person he saw. She was so much more than she knew, and all Teddy wanted to do was show her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With a stab of sadness, he realized that that wasn’t his job. Just because he was head over heels for her, definitely didn’t mean that she felt anywhere close to the same way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighed in frustration and flipped to another page. Her brow furrowed slighted and she rested her forehead on her palm and concentrated on the work in front of her. She had the look on her face that Teddy had loved from the moment she first made it during their first tutoring session. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was snapped out of his thoughts by Al nudging his side softly. “You realize you’re supposed to be helping, </span>
  <em>
    <span>right</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hm, what?” Teddy snapped his head up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Ophelia smirked. “Do I have something on my face?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was taunting him. Teddy should have been embarrassed by the fact she had caught him staring, but responded shamelessly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just glasses.” He reached over the table to tap the bridge of the frames. “All you were missing was the glasses, now you’re, like, a hundred percent nerd.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She laughed, “Are we really surprised though? We knew it would happen sooner or later.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, it’s because you read so much.” Teddy smirked, “I told you it was gonna ruin your eyes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, Teddy,” Ophelia looked adorably annoyed, “For the </span>
  <em>
    <span>last</span>
  </em>
  <span> time, reading does not ruin your eyes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever, you’re still a nerd.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A really cute nerd who I really, really would like to just lean over and kiss...but nerd nonetheless. Yeah, probably should just stick to a nerd</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The group collectively rolled their eyes and returned to work</span>
</p><p>
  <span>However, Teddy didn’t have to suffer for long because he saw Ophelia’s face light up and she rushed over to Cas. Who was currently splayed out on the floor dramatically holding her eyelids open as she tried to continue reading. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas,</span>
  <em>
    <span> Cas,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She shook the redhead by the shoulders. “ I think I found something.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas swatted at Ophelia’s face lazily and mumbled incoherently, Ophelia looked up at the boys helplessly. Her glasses were crooked and Teddy tried to ignore how cute she looked and shrugged. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can’t comprehend.” Cas made no effort in stifling her yawn. “I need coffee or some shit. I must have caffeine in order to go on.”  She flopped back down to the floor and placed her hand on her forehead theatrically. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ugh, Cas, do you know how dirty that floor is?” Ophelia rolled her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe one of us could just sneak into the kitchen to get Butterbeer or something,” Al suggested. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll do it!” Teddy jumped up. “Any excuse to stop this torture, I’m down.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, well, well, of course, Lupin.” Scorpius sneered. “So eager to leave, I should’ve known.” Teddy felt the dormant anger that he carried towards Scorpius bubble up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can’t even talk, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Sunshine</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Teddy spat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, at least the general public </span>
  <em>
    <span>knows</span>
  </em>
  <span> I can read.” Teddy took a step forward but was stopped by a hand on his chest. Ophelia had appeared in front of him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ignore him, Loudmouth.” She said softly, “Butterbeer would be great, thanks.” Teddy nodded trying to hold back the tears he felt welling up in the back of his eyes, he snuck towards the kitchen without another word. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>&lt;&gt; </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once he got back with five glasses of Butterbeer and Cas’ energy was sufficiently revived, Ophelia cleared her throat and began her theory. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pushed her glasses up her nose, “Okay, so as we all know that </span>
  <em>
    <span>supposedly </span>
  </em>
  <span>there are only a few things that can kill a Horcrux.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But that didn’t work the </span>
  <em>
    <span>first</span>
  </em>
  <span> time.” Cas pointed out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly,” Ophelia took a moment to think...and chew her lip. “But </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> think that maybe they just did it wrong.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean wrong?” Scorpius inquired. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, I think that they had the right materials to kill the Horcruxes, I just think they </span>
  <em>
    <span>delivered</span>
  </em>
  <span> it wrong.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” Teddy pondered, “So how do we deliver it </span>
  <em>
    <span>right</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think we have to inject it into the Horcrux.” There was a huge, very confused, silence that followed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But,” Cas scratched her head and yawned. “How do we “inject” the Sword of Gryffindor into a Horcrux?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that’s kinda what I was thinking, what if we used the thing we </span>
  <em>
    <span>can</span>
  </em>
  <span> inject, like Basilisk Venom.” She pushed her hair out of her eyes, “I found the perfect spell we could use.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas sighed, she looked really beat down. “Yeah, that’s all well and good, Phelia, but how do we even get a shit ton of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Basilisk Venom</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al laughed, “We should just break into the Chamber of Secrets.” All eyes were on Al, and Teddy saw the lightbulb go off in Ophelia’s head. Al must have seen it too because he shook his head and mumbled “no” over and over. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was</span>
  <em>
    <span> joking</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Al sunk his hands into his hair. “I wasn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> suggesting we break into the bloody Chamber of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Secrets</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” The group sobered slightly as the severity of the situation settled on the group. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guys, I’m actually with Al on this one.” Cas spoke up, “I mean how would we even get in? None of us speak parseltongue.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al looked down at the table and cleared his throat nervously. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia whipped her head towards Al and jabbed her finger in his direction. “Oh my God, you know something! Al, what?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My dad kindamaybesorta talks in his sleep...like, a lot.” He mumbled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then it’s settled, we’re gonna break into the Chamber of Secrets,” Cas said, then it was like she realized what she actually had said. “Oh my God, we’re gonna break into the Chamber of Secrets.” She whispered rawly. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>How</span>
  </em>
  <span> are we gonna pull this off?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Together,” Ophelia assured as she took Cas’ hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Teddy believed her. </span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius strolled leisurely under the stone archways that snaked along the castle’s courtyard, the barrier from inside to the outdoors, admiring the overcast sky and picturesque feel of the cold on his nose and the view of snow blanketing the grounds. It was his favorite time of year--true winter was just starting to make its way into his life once again, the crystals that covered the grounds only the second snow of the year, and not yet so thick that he would have to work to trudge through it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He pushed away guilt-filled memories of snowball fights in the later winter with Cas, Teddy, Phelia, and Al during the prior year that made the setting all too painful. Speeding up his pace a little bit, Scorpius ducked, avoiding a few branches that had snuck their way under the arches.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just another thing you’re avoiding, </span>
  </em>
  <span>his brain reminded him, twisting the knife of guilt still stuck in his heart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>One that he thought had just begun to heal. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he rounded the corner, Scorpius understood exactly what was holding him back as he was tackled aggressively, so forcefully he almost fell over, by a certain person he really hadn’t wanted to see.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Boo!” Tori squealed, pulling back just enough to smile overenthusiastically up at him. He sighed, pushing the happy memories back as he did all too often around his girlfriend, forcing himself to make eye contact with her in return. He hoped his paralyzing anxiety was at least passing for exasperation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tuning back into reality, Scorpius registered that Tori was still laughing. “What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” she giggled, working hard to suppress her laughter, “Don’t you get it? I said Boo, and like, I call </span>
  <em>
    <span>you </span>
  </em>
  <span>Boo, but I also </span>
  <em>
    <span>scared </span>
  </em>
  <span>you and I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>saying </span>
  </em>
  <span>boo, like--” she fell into another fit of laughter without finishing her phrase.  Scorpius felt an eyebrow raise almost subconsciously, and hurried to change his expression so it looked more amused than disgusted. He felt his chest begin to tighten and his heart begin to speed up as the thoughts slammed against his locked mental doors, her laugh becoming all too loud and his uncomfortable feeling all too apparent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The feeling that while he was with Tori, he was still </span>
  <em>
    <span>completely</span>
  </em>
  <span> alone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scrambling for anything to focus on, Scorpius discreetly glanced around him, looking at the gorgeous snow-covered landscape.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He desperately wished he was sitting out there sketching it rather than standing here with her.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hey, stop, </span>
  </em>
  <span>his brain reprimanded, </span>
  <em>
    <span>looking is so obvious. If you’re going to deliberately ignore your girlfriend at least make it look like you’re trying not to.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Swallowing the urge to back away from her and find a nice quiet place so he could breathe again, Scorpius trained his gaze back to Tori.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He couldn’t focus on </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>, per se...but no one said her </span>
  <em>
    <span>outfit</span>
  </em>
  <span> was off-limits.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was annoyingly put together, as usual. Tori had donned a simple grey top tucked into her ever-so-slightly ripped skinny jeans and was dwarfed in an extremely fluffy looking white cardigan, Her purple-dipped blonde hair was pulled into a sleek half-up-half-down style, with shorter pieces of hair falling forward and coming to frame her face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If he wasn’t completely concentrated on wanting to be anywhere but here, he might’ve thought she was adorable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was</span>
  <em>
    <span> disgustingly</span>
  </em>
  <span> perfect.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And, he had just made everything worse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His breathing was surprisingly labored for someone standing still, and his heart had done anything but slow down. He closed his eyes briefly, glad for once that Tori had gone on a tangent about her week that Scorpius had no interest in listening to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He couldn’t do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was going to lose it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He needs to focus on something else. Anything else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just not </span>
  <em>
    <span>her.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>At that exact moment, his ears picked up on more laughter, coming from a farther distance. Not only one person, but two people. He could hear the weight of their feet breaking through the layer of snow as they went, and he could feel his whole body relax.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Finally. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Letting a smile paint his face, Scorpius moved to look up as the laughter died down...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That is until he heard her voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re literally </span>
  <em>
    <span>the dumbest person</span>
  </em>
  <span> I’ve</span>
  <em>
    <span> ever </span>
  </em>
  <span>met.” Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Scorpius tried to reason with his mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could make this work.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Would the emotional pain and pressure of the guilt from just one glance at Cas hurt like a son of a bitch? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Yes.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>At this point, though, did he even care? </span>
  <em>
    <span>No, not really.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t like he had any trouble focusing on Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally letting his head lift, he focused on her voice and her vivid hair, her laugh and her </span>
  <em>
    <span>adorable</span>
  </em>
  <span> smile, her--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was soon extremely glad that the deep blush on his cheeks just came off as cold. Cas’s vibrant red hair punctuated the snowy background, a maroon beanie adorning her head and making her look cuter than Scorpius had ever thought possible. She was just close enough for him to notice the small Gryffindor crest embroidered near the hem, the tiny lion roaring in triumph as Cas began laughing again. Her face bright and cheerful, her eyes sparkling, and her nose slightly pink with cold, Scorpius wanted to walk over and wrap her in his arms more than ever.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or kiss her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah, definitely kiss her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tearing his eyes away from her face lest Tori notice, Scorpius couldn’t help but grin at how amazing she looked in her wine-red puffer jacket, the hood lined with fur and the zipper just ever so slightly open. Her black jeans just overlapped the top of her brown lace-up boots, the shoes sometimes partly disappearing into the powdery white as they crunched through the snow and she tried to match her step with her company.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius wondered who she was out here with. Ophelia or Al, probably. Teddy? Maybe. It was a given that he wouldn’t have been invited. Who was he kidding? He knew he didn’t deserve her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not at all. Not as a friend.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Definitely</span>
  </em>
  <span> not as more than that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he had nothing to worry about, he reminded himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Except for filling in the impossibly deep grave you’ve dug yourself,</span>
  </em>
  <span> his brain prodded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her voice sounded again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, hey, did you hear me? I said you’re an</span>
  <em>
    <span> idiot</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I take that as the </span>
  <em>
    <span>highest </span>
  </em>
  <span>compliment, Weasel.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was definitely</span>
  <em>
    <span> not </span>
  </em>
  <span>Al.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius rested his eyes on Cas’s buddy and immediately felt as though he had to find something else to focus on, in case his breathing actually stopped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was Milo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius didn’t know him very well, hell, they had probably never said a word to each other. He recognized him from Quidditch games and had seen him hanging around with Jonah and Al before.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If his memory served him, though, Milo was not gay.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Making this increasingly, critically impossibly, bad for Scorpius.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The boy was dressed in dark grey ripped jeans, torn much wider than the ones he had noticed Vicky wearing. His boots were black and thick-soled, cutting through the snow with barely any sound. His grey denim jacket matched his jeans and had been layered over a slightly too-big Gryffindor Quidditch sweatshirt, matching the knitted scarf wrapped around his neck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was tall too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius wouldn’t call himself short, by any means. He himself towered around three or four inches above Cas, but Milo was really tall--Cas was dwarfed in size next to him, adorably small next to his lean frame. She was leaning up against his side, making Milo look even taller than he actually was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked good.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas had probably noticed it too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely </span>
  </em>
  <span>noticed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius couldn’t help himself from glancing at his reflection in the slightly foggy glass of the window of a nearby classroom. He looked in something close to disdain at his dark blue jeans, brown boots, his flannel striped in green, black, and grey peeking out from under a too-big leather jacket. The jacket itself was lined with forest green, dark satin, the outside worn and faded as it fell past his hands wrapped him in complete warmth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was one of the only items of clothing Scorpius actually liked seeing himself in, thought he looked good in, but now…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, all it did was pale in comparison. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His mind was going a thousand miles a minute, miraculously remembering every time he had seen Cas and Milo walking together. Cas and Milo laughing together, or eating together, or studying together, or training together--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas and Milo </span>
  <em>
    <span>together.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt rather like he was shoving together puzzle pieces that didn't quite fit, too eager for an explanation but sure of one thing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was so </span>
  <em>
    <span>incredibly</span>
  </em>
  <span> screwed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He watched as Cas and Milo continued to get farther away, continuing down the path they were on. He could still hear their voice as they walked, getting quieter and quieter all the while. As everything else faded back into view, he could register the sound of someone snapping very loudly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Snap.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Boo?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Snap. Snap.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius whipped his head back to face Tori, pulling a few muscles in the process, using the awkward moment to clear his throat. “Yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you hear </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything </span>
  </em>
  <span>I just said?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wha--oh, um, </span>
  <em>
    <span>yeah</span>
  </em>
  <span>, of course.” He stuttered, trying to reel his thoughts back in as they tried to walk away with Cas and Milo towards...towards</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hogsmeade. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>think so</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Tori said, smiling in spite of her reprimanding tone, “I just told you that Maya was pregnant like seven times!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had absolutely no fucking idea who Maya was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, um...is she?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, stupid!” Tori giggled, “I was just trying to get your attention.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right.” Scorpius scratched the back of his head awkwardly as a half-baked idea formed in his mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This is a bad idea, </span>
  </em>
  <span>his brain warned.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shut the bloody hell up,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Scorpius fired back. “Hey, uh, Tori?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to go to Hogsmeade?”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tori gasped, her face lighting up. “But you </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> want to go to Hogsmeade!” Scorpius shrugged noncommittally.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seems like the day for it.” Tori opened her mouth to agree, but then closed it again and frowned. “What is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We don’t have our signed permission statements, though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius grinned genuinely for the first time since he had started talking to Tori today. “Who says we need those?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For the first time in his life, he took the initiative to grab Tori’s hand and jog towards the groups of students heading to Hogsmeade. Ducking behind some trees to avoid Filch and McGonagall monitoring who left, Scorpius stopped just behind a small trio of students to blend in with the crowd. Letting go of Tori’s hand as she came to a stop beside him, he smiled. “See? Easy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was very rebellious of you,” Tori commented, snaking her arm around Scorpius’s waist. “It’s hot.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius swallowed thickly and tried to ignore </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> that had just happened. Shuffling his feet for a while in the snow, Scorpius’s senses heightened as he heard the two familiar voices again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Milo,” Cas said, her voice sickeningly sweet and much closer to him this time, “Can I have your scarf?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh...” Milo met her gaze, looking almost straight down at her due to his height. He glanced up and down at her winter ensemble, looking back to Cas’s expectant face incredulously. “Why?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because, it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>cold.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo scoffed, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s cold---</span>
  </em>
  <span>Cas, your hood is literally furry, how are you</span>
  <em>
    <span> cold</span>
  </em>
  <span>?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s like negative twenty billion degrees outside </span>
  <em>
    <span>if</span>
  </em>
  <span> you haven’t noticed.” Cas fired back. “I’m cold. Sue me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m literally wearing ripped jeans and you don’t hear me complaining, do you?” He could practically hear Cas’s eye roll.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was your choice. You chose to suffer in this dismal as </span>
  <em>
    <span>hell</span>
  </em>
  <span> weather,</span>
  <em>
    <span> I’m</span>
  </em>
  <span> sorry that</span>
  <em>
    <span> I </span>
  </em>
  <span>can’t tolerate the--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo raked a hand through his hair. “If I give you the scarf, will you </span>
  <em>
    <span>shut the hell up</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe you’d</span>
  <em>
    <span> find out </span>
  </em>
  <span>if you’d give me the</span>
  <em>
    <span> fucking scarf-</span>
  </em>
  <span>-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Removing his arm from where it had draped around her shoulders, Milo ripped the scarf from around his own neck, balled it up, and threw it at Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius could see why he was a star chaser.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>suck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Weasel.” Milo sped up his gate, putting distance between himself and Cas while grumbling overdramatically.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Love you too!” Cas called after him, drawing out the last word and shooting him her most hopeful smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All he offered in return was flipping Cas off and walking even faster. Cas laughed ecstatically and started running to catch up, leaving Scorpius in the dust.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>snow.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>What the hell was he saying? Cas didn’t even know he had heard them. She didn’t know he was coming to Hogsmeade, he doubted she would’ve wanted him there if she had known.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Screw it.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He was too far gone, he--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, boo?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He almost tripped. “Yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where’s your scarf? I thought you might’ve grabbed it since it’s so cold out today...did you not get it? I swear I put it on your bed, not Al’s, or--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-no, Tori, you’re good, I got it, I was just...in a rush, this morning, I forgot to grab it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh...alright.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius was glad she hadn’t pressed any further, as he was currently trying to remember to breathe. Memories of the hospital wing, of their fight with Nagini, of...of</span>
  <em>
    <span> Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span> came flooding back and pressed at every area of Scorpius' brain, fading into images of Cas’s stolen Gryffindor scarf, images that made the corners of his eyes burn with unshed tears.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It’s just a stupid scarf, Scorpius, suck it up.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, he was saved from diving deep into the bottomless pit that was his guilt by the hustle and bustle of Hogsmeade.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every shop and awning was blanketed by a layer of snow. The small town was jam-packed with students and a few other wizarding families, bustling around from shop to shop with armfuls of bags and boxes, enjoying the chilly winter afternoon and the warmth of butterbeer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It would’ve been nice to stay awhile, just standing there admiring the scene, but Scorpius’s mind was too busy trying to figure out ways to find Cas and Milo. And ways to make sure that Tori didn’t figure out that he was figuring out ways to find Cas and Milo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or that they were even here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or that he </span>
  <em>
    <span>cared.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius let Tori drag him through the winding cobblestone streets, stopping every few seconds to look at something in a window that Tori wanted to eat, or wear, or buy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was what he had expected, of course, but that didn’t make it any less intolerable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Especially when his mind was focused on more than “cute” sweaters or caramel apples. Much more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At this point, his ulterior motive for spending the day in Hogsmeade with Tori was the only thing keeping him there. He tried to ground himself in the moment, let fate put them in his line of view, actually try to enjoy this afternoon with someone who rarely asked so little of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius felt a pang of guilt as the thought that he might be hurting Tori as well by doing all of this crossed his mind. He had led her on, used her as a disguise to hide his insecurities and guilty feelings, and now...it was all coming back to bite him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even now, he realized that while he might be trying to fix something, he was breaking something else at the same time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hogsmeade was the least he could do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So, he gave in. He bought the candy apple, followed Tori to all of her favorite shops, definitely not complaining when they stopped at Honeydukes to pick up some Fizzing Whizbees. He had to admit, they were his--</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Favorite.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What are you waiting for? You love fizzing whizbees!”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Stop. He really had to stop doing this remembering-last-year-and-feeling-crazy-guilty thing that literally happened twenty times a day. It was seriously messing with this whole fixing everything but still pretending to be a fine thing. Besides, guilt was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> a good look on him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ugh. He was starting to sound like Tori. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And there it was. The one intrusive thought that tore down the mental walls he built each day and removed any inclination he had to tolerate the situation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>perfect.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>As he stood in the comfortable warmth of Dervish and Banges, Scorpius contemplated this situation involving Cas and Milo even further while Tori searched around for something she needed for Potions class.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to admit, it made a lot of sense.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had always been close. They had been good friends long before Cas even knew who he was. Or cared. Either way. Especially last year, while Scorpius was still extremely set on being a douchebag, Milo had always been there. They had a soft spot for each other, that’s for sure. Now, after he had ruined everything, it made an extreme amount of sense that Milo and Cas would be spending more time together, whether it be training for Quidditch season or just “hanging out.” Although he was getting slightly closer to mending his relationship with Cas and the others, he doubted Cas had even come close to forgiving him enough to even have second thoughts about...dating.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d blown it. He’d pushed the limit until it had broken for much too long, and now it was too late.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Boo!” Tori called, “I’m just going to pay for this real quick, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah!” Scorpius called out, “You’re good!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sighing at how extremely awkward every word he directed at Tori felt to say, Scorpius looked back up to glance out of the doorway--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And immediately noticed just who he’d been looking for.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas and Milo walked briskly down the street, laughing and chatting a mile a minute. As Tori came up to him with her bag of things, Scorpius used her arrival as an excuse to open or exit the door. His gaze followed the two of them as they headed for Zonko’s, trying to quiet his breathing and make sure it wasn’t too obvious that he was way too involved in every move the two made together. As they reached the brightly colored storefront, Milo hurried ahead to grab the door and hold it open for Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius wasn’t sure if he felt more like crying or puking at the sight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks, m’lady!” Cas said in an overly-exaggerated pompous accent. Milo rolled his eyes but laughed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Last I checked, you were the “lady” in this relationship, Cas.” he chuckled, following the redhead through the doorway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In this relationship?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In this relationship.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This relationship.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So it was true. He had been right, and he had blown it. He had screwed up just as badly as he’d thought and there was no way that he would be able to come back from this no---</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But wait...there they were again. Milo and Cas were exiting Zonko’s after only a minute or two. They came to a stop a few feet from the doorway, looking in all manner of direction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What was happening?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We must have overshot this a bit…” Milo ventured, earning a playful punch in the arm from Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somehow, it felt like it was Scorpius’s hope that she was hitting instead.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, no shit, Chance. They have to be around here somewhere.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh! By that tree.” Milo was pointing, and Scorpius followed the direction of his outstretched arm to see Ophelia, Al, Jonah, and Teddy waiting under a large oak tree near Zonko’s. Milo did some type of weird high-five-handshake thing with Teddy, hugged Ophelia and Jonah, and went in to hug Al but stopped. Looking the Potter up and down, Milo grinned. “Sick doc’s, dude.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Although Scorpius would never admit it, he agreed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The dark, thick-soled boots went incredibly well with Al’s dark jeans, paired with a stormy grey pullover. He had left the collar of his shirt to peek out over the neckline of his sweater, which Scorpius could just barely see as it was mostly covered by an incredibly soft-looking thick dark green scarf. His grey beanie went well with the ensemble, and Scorpius could see gloves on Al’s hands as he nudged Jonah for making a comment that went something like, “No matter how thick your boots are, Al, they’re still not gonna make you taller than me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius couldn’t help but notice how well the latter was dressed as well. Jonah’s jeans were a lighter wash and his boots a deep brown. The cream-colored knit sweater he was wearing looked incredibly thick and comfortable, and the darker green of his well-fitting cargo jacket suited him immensely well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius could almost feel his eyes glaze over as he retreated into his mind and continued to watch the group. He was very, very uncomfortable with how relaxed everyone else seemed around Milo. Scorpius hated to think that this might’ve been going on for a lot longer than he had previously thought.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How left out of the loop had he been?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>True, his breathing did come a little easier now that he had realized that Milo and Cas were not on a date, but his mind hadn’t yet run it’s course of all the possibilities this increasingly close “friendship” seemed to hold for them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thought that it was more than that made his stomach turn.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius looked on as the group entered the Three Broomsticks, talking and laughing as they went. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was proud of how fast he checked back into reality, turning to Tori in record time as she approached him, new bag of things in hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where to next, Boo?” She asked innocently. Scorpius steadied himself and asked the question before his overbearing thoughts could stop him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How about the Three Broomsticks? We could get Butterbeer, maybe?” he ventured.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Perfect!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without waiting for any other reaction, Scorpius led the way to the door, holding it open for Tori and cringing at how similar his actions were to what he had just seen Cas and Milo doing minutes before.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He let Tori find a table as he went to get drinks for the two of them. Taking the long way around to the bar, Scorpius spotted the group of the hour as they chatted over their own mugs of the warm golden liquid. Scorpius watched as Ophelia cleaned her glasses, muttering something about how annoying it was when they fogged up whenever they entered or exited a shop. Teddy laughed and made some offhand comment that the Lovegood obviously wasn’t very happy with since she reached over and pulled one of the strings of Teddy’s violently purple Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes hoodie. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Leaning away from her and readjusting his black denim jacket, Teddy made a sour face at Ophelia as she smugly put her glasses back on, drying them on the hem of her tan pea coat. She removed her Gryffindor scarf and light grey beanie due to the warmth of the room, running her fingers through her hair a few times before sitting up straight and reaching for her mug. Teddy and Al began laughing at something only known to them, warranting sighs and eye rolls from Ophelia and Cas, the brunette kicking Teddy playfully under the table. He returned the favor, which she copied again and again until their legs became a mess of light and dark denim. The flurry of brown and black boots under the table made everyone severely aggravated, but the moment had passed before anyone could mention it out loud.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius returned to the table Tori was sitting at, sipping his Butterbeer in silence as she went on and on about how annoying this one girl in Charms class had been the other day. No matter how hard he tried to focus on his drink, or the interesting pictures and tapestries on the walls, or the even more interesting figures who populated the pub, he found himself turning back to a certain table every time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was far enough away at this point that he couldn’t hear what they were saying, but that didn’t stop him from wishing desperately that he was deserving enough to be there, laughing along with them, or even just enough that they would’ve thought to invite him in the first place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alternatively, he would’ve taken being smart enough not to screw things up in the first place in a heartbeat.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Being so involved in his thoughts had come with a price, though: Tori had caught on.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are you looking at?” she inquired, following his gaze until she, too, was looking at the loudest table in the pub. “Oh...aren’t those your “friends” from last year?” she continued, making air quotes as she sneered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Scorpius agreed reflexively, completely forgetting to tack on a snide comment. Silence fell between them before Scorpius spoke up again. “Maybe I should go say hi.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But I though--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Should I say hi?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re right. I should go say hi.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Boo--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll be right back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shooting up from his chair before Tori could stop him, Scorpius strolled as casually as he could over to the group’s table. Their conversations quieted as they noticed him. Scorpius was thankful that for once, the only ones looking at him angrily were Teddy, and unfortunately...Milo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you...need something?” the latter said, no trace of the joking attitude Scorpius had seen earlier insight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, um...no, I just wanted to say hello to you guys while I was here…” he smiled sheepishly, glancing at Al and happy to find a small smile on the green-eyed boy's face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I haven’t seen you in Hogsmeade in awhile, Scorpius.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thanks, Al.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, well, it seemed like a good day for it, so I figured why not?” he joked, grinning even wider when Al chuckled and Ophelia offered him a smile. Even Cas’s features weren’t graced with their customary frown whenever Scorpius was around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment was ruined when Milo scoffed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So this is the infamous Scorpius, huh?” he asked with fake curiosity. Scorpius opened his mouth to reply, determined to save this interaction, but Milo wasn’t finished. “Cas has told me so much about you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius swallowed his hurt and anger before smiling. “All bad things, I hope.” he tried to joke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah.” Milo replied coldly, “You could say that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Look, I don’t know what I did to offend you, but I don’t want any trouble--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then why are you here?” Milo asked, standing from his chair. “No, I’m serious. You got an answer?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius’s throat went dry. “I…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s what I thought, Malfoy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly Cas was standing too, her hand placed firmly across Milo’s chest. “Hey, stop it--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s going on?” Tori’s voice echoed from behind Scorpius. Balling his fist, Scorpius took a deep breath before smiling as happily as he could.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing, Tori, it’s--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi guys!” she waved at the group, paying special attention to Cas, her smile becoming a bit more forced as she turned to the girl. “Oh my god, Cas, that beanie looks so good on you! I love your hair when it’s covered up like that!”</span>
</p><p><span>Everyone else was standing now, too. Scorpius felt like crying. “Tori, stop--”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Thanks, Vicky!” Cas smiled back, her voice as sickeningly fake as his girlfriend’s. “Wish I could say the same for you.”</span></p><p>
  <span>Tori’s jaw dropped, her hands coming self-consciously to the fluffy white beanie on her own head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas--” Al cautioned her, but Milo cut him off by objecting loudly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think it’s time for you two lovebirds to leave.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius grinned emotionlessly, sparing one more look to Cas and Al before nodding. “For once, we agree.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not even stopping to grab Tori’s hand, Scorpius turned on his heel and raced out of the Three Broomsticks, hurrying through the streets and back towards the castle. He could hear Tori’s footsteps racing behind him, but he didn’t care. He ran back through Hogsmeade, under the entry arch, back up the snowy hill to the castle, back onto the grounds, and back through the huge double doors he had entered the courtyard through.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was stupid to think he had ever had a chance, especially with Milo around. Sure he was fixing things, but it was an idiot move to think they were fixed </span>
  <em>
    <span>enough </span>
  </em>
  <span>by now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could hear Tori calling him. “Boo? But I thought you wanted to spend the day in Hogsmeade with--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius whipped around. “Yeah? Well, I changed my mind,</span>
  <em>
    <span> if</span>
  </em>
  <span> you couldn’t tell.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He continued down several flights of stairs until he had reached and entered the Slytherin common room. Unfortunately, she was still close behind him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius, I’m sorry that all of those idiots got to you, but-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned around again. “They weren’t the ones</span>
  <em>
    <span> getting to me</span>
  </em>
  <span>, funnily enough.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stood there in stunned silence for a moment before backing down. “Okay. Okay, alright, so you need some space. I’m…” she looked around, backing towards the door. “I’m going to find something to eat.” She left without another word.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius slumped onto the couch, letting his head fall into his hands and groaning in frustration. Not only had today been one big shit show, he had rounded it all off by lashing out at his “girlfriend”, and getting nothing less than a reasonable response. Why couldn’t she give him just </span>
  <em>
    <span>one</span>
  </em>
  <span> reason to hate her?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was shaping up to be</span>
  <em>
    <span> much</span>
  </em>
  <span> harder than when it had started.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It’s okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he tried to console himself, </span>
  <em>
    <span>You’re going to fix this.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But could he?</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ophelia exited the Transfiguration classroom, weaving her way through her fellow students and continuing down the hallway alone. Al and Cas had disappeared somewhere together, mentioning something about Cas training for Quidditch with Milo and Jonah hanging out with Al. Normally, Ophelia would join them to do some drills with Jonah, she didn’t want to interrupt him and Al, and she was fine spending an hour or two alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or maybe she didn’t have to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just as the thought crossed her mind, she spotted Teddy amidst a group of a few other students, laughing and discussing someone with some of the other seventh years. Smiling, she made her way over to them, spotting James and Ian among them, the former of which she enjoyed hanging out with much more than the latter.  Just before she reached them, however, she heard Ian call out something jokingly over the roar of the other students.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey! Any of you losers ready for that Arithmancy test tomorrow?” Everyone in the group laughed, unsurprisingly. Much to her surprise, however, Teddy was laughing right along with them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As if,” he scoffed, “There’s no way I’m spending any more time looking at those stupid symbols and objects. No. Way. I don’t care about the results of that stupid test.” The other students trickled away, leaving Teddy, James, and Ian alone. Ophelia, on the other hand, was not letting this go.</span>
</p><p><span>Had all of those tireless hours studying last year taught him nothing?</span><span><br/></span> <span>Loudmouth Lupin. She supposed some things never changed.</span></p><p>
  <span>Stomping up to them, she smiled curtly at the two boys that flanked him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi, James. Hi, Teddy.” Ian threw his hands up into the air at not being recognized.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What am I now? Invisible, or something?” James laughed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you guys hear something?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia swiveled just slightly to look Teddy directly in the eyes. Or, to look </span>
  <em>
    <span>up</span>
  </em>
  <span> to look him directly in the eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Curse Lupin and his tallness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anyway,” she interrupted, drawing out the last syllable, “Can I talk to you, Teddy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aren’t you talking to him right now?” Ian asked mockingly. James punched him the arm, offering Ophelia an apologetic smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ignore him. Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Ian wasn’t finished. “Woah, goody-two-shoes...are those glasses I see?” he was looking her directly in the eyes, holding back a laugh at the apparently very amusing glasses she had forgotten were resting on the bridge of her nose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow, she really went full nerd on us, huh?” Ian commented, nudging James and pointing lazily at Ophelia. “Shame.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ian--” James tried, putting a hand in front of his chest as if to stop him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s still hot though,” he added, grinning at James for a moment before turning back to Ophelia. “Don’t worry, we still think you’re hot. Right, James?” Ian waited expectantly for an answer, but James said nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Surprisingly, neither did Ophelia.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whenever she was in a position that caused her to interact with Ian, Ophelia always made sure to gather up all of her best witty remarks and sarcastic comments, since she would probably end up needing a few. Ian rarely disappointed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But this...this was different.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If it had been anything else, Ophelia tried to reason, literally anything else, she could’ve handled it. Even if he’d just been teasing her about her glasses, it would’ve been fine; she got enough of that from her classmates already. That was normal. She was used to that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And yet, the fact that he tried to console her with the idea of still being “hot” made her freeze.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia never thought of herself as hot. She didn’t mind it, sure, but she wasn’t exactly a fan when someone said it like that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Especially when that someone was Ian Kent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was still laughing. “Wow, buzzkill.” he bumped into James with his shoulder, still smirking widely. “I’d still totally tap that. C’mon, James, you know you would too. I bet--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ian, could you just shut the hell up for once in your life?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Teddy was between them. Ophelia was pulled deeper into the deep waters of shock, staring at the blue-haired boy with wide eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, you don’t have to--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Actually, I do.” he essentially growled. Turning back to Ian, he smiled emotionlessly. “As I was saying, it would be great if you could do us all a favor and butt the fuck out for once, m’kay?” He said, ending the sentence sickeningly sweet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ian stood in stunned silence. “Yeah, man...okay. Whatever.” Grabbing his book bag from the floor near the Arithmancy classroom doorway, Ian slung the worn leather satchel over his shoulder and walked away, hanging his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy adjusted his position, turning back to face Ophelia and stand next to James. She sighed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, it was fine, you really didn’t have to do that for me--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Except it wasn’t fine, Phelia.” Teddy grimaced, shaking his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t help but smile a little. “I have been telling you to stop hanging out with Ian for like a year now…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>James laughed, turning to Teddy. He wasn’t smiling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Carding his fingers through his hair, Teddy focused his eyes on the ground. “Can we just talk about something else, please?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>James and Ophelia shared a look, both completely unsure of what to say. Ophelia took the initiative to break the slightly awkward silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, alright….as I was saying before we were all so</span>
  <em>
    <span> rudely </span>
  </em>
  <span>interrupted, can I talk to you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span> “Sure, Phe. What’s up?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia cleared her throat awkwardly. “Uh...alone?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Grabbing Teddy by the strap of his bookbag, Ophelia dragged him out of the oak double doors and into the courtyard. Parking the two of them under a large tree, Ophelia sat herself down and opened her book bag, pulling out every arithmancy book she had. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, that was only two, but it was the thought that counted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy stood in confused silence. Motioning for him to sit down, Ophelia used her other hand to toss him one of the books. He thumbed through it, looking increasingly more bewildered as he got farther through the pages.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you wanted to…t-to talk to me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She frowned at his tone of voice. “I do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then why are you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighed. “I said I wanted to talk to you...I never said about what.” Teddy slumped down beside her, finally catching on.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You brought me here….to talk about Arithmancy?” she nodded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep. Specifically, to study Arithmancy. And…” she added, glancing at him sideways, “Why you don’t plan on studying for Arithmancy.” Teddy groaned, rolling away from her and splaying himself across the grass.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I should’ve known this was a trap.” Ophelia couldn’t help but laugh at how resigned he sounded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Loudmouth, this isn’t a trap--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pulling me away from my friends mysteriously, seducing me and convincing me to come “talk” when in reality you had an ulterior motive the whole time? I don’t know...kinda sounds like a trap to me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nobody said anything about seducing you, Teddy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regardless, I’m still stuck here. Studying. With you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She grinned. “What else is new?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Grumbling something about trusting no one, Teddy sat up and picked up the book he had thrown a couple of feet in Ophelia’s direction. Thumbing through it, Ophelia had to remind him there was no way that he was going to be able to absorb any information when the book was upside down. Slamming it and setting it down beside him, Teddy turned dramatically to Ophelia, giving her his very best puppy eyes,</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just don’t understand why this test is so important.” Ophelia felt like throwing her own book as far as she could. Maybe trying to break the window of the Charms classroom would be fun.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because, Teddy,” she enunciated, “In case you didn’t know, you’re a seventh year. Seventh years have to take N.E.W.T tests to determine their job prospects, that’s very important, Mister.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy gave her a look that suggested she had just asked him to light his precious hair on fire. “Those are in, like, June, though. The stuff we have to know for those exams aren’t important for another few months. I wasn’t planning on asking you to make me study--I wasn’t planning on studying for those until like...April. Or May. Depends on my mood.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia grabbed him squarely by the shoulders and shook him slightly, forcing him to look her directly in the eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>To be fair, his gaze made her cheeks heat up more than she would’ve liked to admit. Although, in all honesty, she was kind of used to it by now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What would she do with Teddy Lupin? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Look, Teddy,” she said, softening her tone. “I know studying is annoying. I mean, even I hate it a lot of the ti---”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Woah,” Teddy’s jaw practically hit the floor. “Are you actually saying what I think you’re saying?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All I meant was--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re totally ruining my image of you, Phe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhh,” he held his finger to her lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia could’ve died right then and there. She spared his finger a quick glance before backing away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What I was trying to say, if you would let me, was that there are times to skimp on studying and times not to. This year, for you, is definitely not the time. It’s your last year, Teddy. Your last year at Hogwarts! You should make the most of it; do the best you can so it pays off and you’re less stressed when exams actually come around. So you do amazing on your N.E.W.T’s--which I know you will---” she added at Teddy’s skeptical look, “and then you can move on after school and do something with your life.” she paused. Teddy wasn’t meeting her eyes anymore. Instead, he was focused intently on a singular blade of grass that he was picking at.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, you want to do something once you get out of here, don’t you?” she scrambled to rephrase her comment before Teddy could answer. “No, you will do something once you get out of here. You’re gonna do something great with your life, Loudmouth--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What makes you so sure?” Teddy remarked bitterly, still not meeting her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Teddy…” Ophelia reached out to him with her arm, resisting to grab his chin and turn his head and instead of settling for placing a hand on his shoulder. “I am sure. You know why? Because you’re smart, Teddy. You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. Really, Loudmouth. You’re funny...I don’t give you enough credit, and I’m sorry. You’re hilarious as hell, and you always make my day, and...someone as wonderful as you has a future, Teddy. Such a bright one, too. You’re going to do something with it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks, Phe,” Teddy replied quietly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A silence fell over the two of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia may have convinced him, but it was clear that none of her “studying” was going to be happening today.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She broke the silence. “Have you...thought about what you might want to do once you graduate?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took him several minutes to answer. “Yeah, I have. A lot, actually. I was...maybe thinking about becoming a healer. Specializing in bites, or venom, or something. I’ve always been pretty good at Herbology, and I’m surprisingly kind of decent at Potions...I just feel like I’ve always wanted to do something that’ll honor my dad’s memory. Maybe that’s the way to do it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded, her thoughts working a mile a minute. She was currently trying to remember how to function, thinking about this boy...this boy who most of his friends actually knew nothing about, who she was friends with, whose walls she had knocked down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy Lupin was seriously going to be the death of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What about you?” Teddy reciprocated the question. Ophelia turned her eyes to focus on the now setting sun.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you want to do in two years, when you graduate? You can’t pretend you haven’t thought about it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was blanking. “I actually...haven’t. I don’t know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy handed her two books back, smiling gratefully over at her. “Well, you are a pretty damn good tutor. Ever thought about becoming a professor? Coming back here after you’re done?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia had to admit...that was a really interesting idea. “Yeah, actually. I like that. Who knows,” she added playfully, “Maybe one day I’ll run this place.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy scoffed. “Like McGonagall would ever leave.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia laughed at his joke as they rose from their spots, heading back towards the doors to the castle. It was probably a few minutes into dinner already, and she had to admit, she was starving. They strolled lazily through the courtyard, making offhand remarks about how McGonagall was probably immortal and shit, as they reached the steps leading to the big double doors. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, something made her stop. She couldn't have put her finger on what. It almost felt like someone, or something was watching her. She turned around, probably confusing Teddy in the process. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was nothing there. She turned her head erratically, checking the forest…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The path to Hogsmeade…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Definitely not nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A large mass of oil was seeping out through the small spaces between the doors and the floor of the castle, lurching down the steps and flowing down the small hill. There was so much of it. More than she had ever seen before.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She froze. Her throat dried up. Her lungs seemed to stop working.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No. This could not be happening, this wasn’t happening, they had made sure this wouldn’t happen again. They knew this wouldn’t happen.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Nagini had left. She was gone. It was all supposed to be over.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Apparently, the other Horcruxes that had “died” in the castle hadn’t gotten the message. She heard someone’s labored breathing as if from far away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took her a solid while to realize she was the one making those sounds. Suddenly, Teddy had grabbed her hand. “Phelia…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The noise seemed to trigger it. The mass stopped moving for a second as if waiting in bated breath to see what the two of them would do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy tugged at her hand. “Phelia...w-we need to go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>We need to go.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, somehow, without her knowledge, she was moving. Letting Teddy drag her through the doors, through the hallways, into the Great Hall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her limbs seemed to remember how to work. She caught up to Teddy, matching his step and speed as they made their way quickly around the perimeter of the large room. Ophelia found Cas, Teddy dragged Al and Scorpius. She had no idea where they were headed, or how they both ended up in the same place, but soon all five of them were in the library. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas cut through the very confused silence. “As much as I loved this little bit of exercise, what the </span>
  <em>
    <span>hell</span>
  </em>
  <span> are we doing here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia swallowed thickly. “We were wrong.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“T-they’re</span>
  <em>
    <span> back.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”  Cas choked out as she frantically tore her hands through her hair. “Please tell me this is some kind of sick joke. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Please</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al heard Ophelia’s shaky answer through what felt like cotton, he already knew what her answer would be, it didn’t make it any easier to hear. Although it was a quiet response it echoed with a deafening truth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their plans had been foiled, by the very thing they were trying to destroy. By some evil twist of fate, the other four Horcruxes were seen leaving Hogwarts, which meant that the five of them would have to come up with yet </span>
  <em>
    <span>another</span>
  </em>
  <span> plan to stop the Horcruxes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“W-we can figure this out guys,” Ophelia starts. “Do-don’t worry.” She was clinging onto the back of a chair like it was the only thing keeping her from collapsing. Al was truly too terrified to look up, all he could do was stare at his hands, his attention was drawn to his fingernails. They were freshly painted a dark navy blue, Jonah had enthusiastically agreed once Al shyly asked if he would paint his nailbeds for him. They sat under a tree by the black lake, legs tangled together as he happily watched the look of concentration on Jonah’s face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al had laughed at the way his eyebrows creased together and his auburn curls fell in front of his eyes. He then promptly got scolded about smudging Jonah’s  “life’s work” which apparently just meant he didn’t want Al ruining his nails. Al had happily kissed away Jonah’s playful scowl, and they laid under that tree for what could have been minutes or days. That was the way it always was with Jonah, time was different, because all that mattered was that Al was </span>
  <em>
    <span>with </span>
  </em>
  <span>him, happy, himself, and completely, terrifyingly in love. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That bubbly feeling he had felt in his chest was replaced with a sickening worry. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All five of them stood in a broken circle, too stunned to move. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, we know that the Horcruxes nested where they were ‘killed’” Teddy started, making quotation marks with his fingers, “So maybe we can, y’know, go after the ones that are still </span>
  <em>
    <span>in</span>
  </em>
  <span> the castle a--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia cut him off and rubbed her eyes, almost like she was making sure this wasn’t a nightmare. Al could relate. “Teddy, you and I both know that all the slime wasn’t just one Horcrux. They’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>gone</span>
  </em>
  <span>, which means there are four, wait, no, </span>
  <em>
    <span>five</span>
  </em>
  <span> including Nagini, deadly forces out in the world who knows where doing who knows what. ” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al trained his eyes on his cousin. Her lips were drawn into a thin line and the corners of all her features were pulled tight with worry, instinctively, he moved to grab her hand. He could read her like a book, and he could tell she needed it. Cas immediately leaned into his touch, grasping his hand, she needed him and he was there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was always there. There to go into a forest at night and kill an evil zombie Horcrux. There to scheme in the library at three a.m. in the morning. And there to ground Cas when their whole world once again got tipped on its side. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And she was there for him because she knew he was holding on to her as much as she was him, it still was terrifying though. It didn’t stop Al’s stomach from dropping to the ground. It didn’t stop his hands from shaking. And it sure as hell didn’t stop Al’s mind from going straight to Jonah. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The boy with the blue eyes. He had brought out a side of Al he had never been brave enough to show, Jonah was a place for Al just to be, and now he was putting that in danger yet again. How was he supposed to keep Jonah safe if he could even keep himself safe? How could he expect Jonah to want to be with him, to want to stay with him, if he didn’t even want to be with </span>
  <em>
    <span>himself</span>
  </em>
  <span> throughout this shit show of a situation? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A deadly silence fell over the group as the unspoken question bounced between them all. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What now?</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Al looked at the figures surrounding the table. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia kept a determinedly blank face as she chewed her lip, her bright eyes had glazed over. Undoubtedly trying to figure out every single possible way they could beat this thing, Al’s insides were swarmed with a tremendous amount of respect for the girl. He knew she would fight until the end. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy stood dutifully next to the brunette, his hand resting lightly on her lower back, almost like a reminder she wasn’t alone. Al watched his cousin’s face intently, trying to figure out what might be going on in his head. He knew Teddy was in Hufflepuff for a reason, his loyalty was practically shining through, and Al loved him for it. Al had looked up to him his whole life, he always admired his strength and charisma, because that was something he always struggled with. But now there was so much more to look up to. All of a sudden he was so much more than </span>
  <em>
    <span>just</span>
  </em>
  <span> popular. He was there for him, he was there for Ophelia, he was there for the school. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shifted his gaze to Scorpius and was overwhelmed by the mixed feelings that attacked his insides. His defined features, the features that had once enamored Al, were tight and looked like if a strong enough breeze blew his way, they would crumble. Yet he was still here, and Al wanted nothing more than to know why, Scorpius was pretty convincing, he clearly didn’t need them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He no longer needed Al’s friendship, or </span>
  <em>
    <span>anyone’s</span>
  </em>
  <span>, anymore. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was the perplexing part of the whole situation, because Scorpius, in fact, </span>
  <em>
    <span>had</span>
  </em>
  <span> needed him. The image of Scorpius curled in on himself, crying uncontrollably, on the floor...</span>
  <em>
    <span>alone</span>
  </em>
  <span>, was at the front of his mind when the two made quick, awkward eye contact. Maybe there was more going on under the surface than his friends knew, maybe all of this douchiness was really a cry for help. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al stopped himself when he looked over at Cas. She was still leaning against him but no longer looking up at him with big, worried brown eyes. Instead, her gaze was not-so-subtly fixed on Scorpius. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe</span>
  </em>
  <span> Scorpius did need their help, but Al couldn’t do that without an apology to Cas. He knew she was too stubborn to ever say it, but Scorpius had broken her heart, and no matter how broken Scorpius himself was, Al couldn’t let himself forget that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No matter how </span>
  <em>
    <span>much</span>
  </em>
  <span> he would appreciate Scorpius’ friendship now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All five of them knew what had to be done, and as soon as Al felt Cas straighten out her back and hold her head high, he knew that she was going to be the one to say it. Because that was who Cas was, no bullshit, balls out, and terrified as shit but too scared to show it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then we need to hunt them down.” Her voice was clear and just a </span>
  <em>
    <span>little</span>
  </em>
  <span> too high to pass as confident. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The heavy silence of the group broke. Teddy let a stream of very creative curses fly as he started to pace, dragging his hands through his hair. Over and over again. Al himself was trying not to pass out at the severity of the situation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They would have to leave Hogwarts, their home, to go after five Horcruxes, one of which had already almost killed them once before, and they had had an Infirmary then. They had had teachers that could save them if they really needed it. There was a safety net before, a safety that was going to be completely removed if they did this. Al would have to leave everything behind. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Everyone</span>
  </em>
  <span> behind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fuck, Jonah.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His heart sank as thoughts of broad shoulders encircling him and soft smiles attached to twinkling blue eyes floated to the front of his mind. The knife of emotion twisted at the thought of leaving Jonah behind, they would go after the Horcruxes, risking their lives, and Jonah would be here. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al tried to imagine it. Jonah training for Quidditch, going to classes, talking to friends, but under the surface, always in the back of his mind, would be the fact that Al was gone. Out in the world, gone. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No.</span>
  </em>
  <span> No. No. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al couldn’t, </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>, do that to him. It wasn’t fair for him. It wasn’t fair to either of them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nothing about this was fair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al wouldn’t leave the school without closure...Jonah deserved that much. If they were going to do this Al would have to leave Jonah behind, </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> leave him, the thought made him want to throw up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or pass out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or close his eyes and just never wake up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He snapped his head up, desperate for something to distract him. Teddy was still pacing and cursing up a storm. Cas and Ophelia were bickering. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Way to sugarcoat it, Cas,” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How in the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> am I supposed to sugar coat that?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Exactly</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The slight amusement he had gained from watching Ophelia and Cas bicker like an old married couple was snatched away when he trained his gaze on Scorpius. His hands were the only thing holding up his head and his shoulders were shuddering violently but no sound came from his side of the room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al didn’t know what to do. Would he hurt Cas by being there for Scorpius? Would he only make things worse by trying to help Scorpius? Or would it break Scorpius more if he </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> help him? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Screw it. They were about to ditch school to save the world together, if </span>
  <em>
    <span>anyone</span>
  </em>
  <span> gets offended they would just have to deal. He slowly moved toward him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Deja vu. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al knelt next to him and reached a hand out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span> The dark paint on his nails stood out dramatically against the white of Scorpius’ school shirt. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ha, the things you notice when your whole world is ending. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>As soon as Al’s hand made contact with his shoulder, Al felt his whole body tense under his fingers. Then Scorpius Malfoy broke, Al could imagine the tiny spider web cracks moving down his broad shoulders. Splitting his face in half, revealing all of the pain beneath the facade he had recently put back up. The pain that Al helped heal last year. He wondered if anyone else could see it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He glanced back up and met Cas’ intense stare, and he had his answer. He could see the longing in her eyes, she was looking at Scorpius when she thought nobody was looking. She looked at Scorpius like he was the most complex challenge she had ever come across, and she loved it. Al knew Scorpius used to look at her the same way, and part of him knew that the feelings Scorpius had once had for Cas didn’t just go away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was such a goddamn tragedy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The fact that they had to risk their lives again was a goddamn tragedy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The fact that he had to leave Jonah was a goddamn tragedy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This whole goddamn situation was a </span>
  <em>
    <span>goddamn tragedy</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al’s whole being felt drained. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He dipped his head slightly so he could see Scorpius’ face better, unsure of what to say, and sure as hell unsure of what to do. The blond had frozen, his shoulders tense and his breathing stilled to an uneven gasping, Al knew he was mortified. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius,” He started tentatively, trying to ignore the fact that Teddy, Ophelia, and Cas’ eyes were all trained on him being civil to Scorpius. “Are you okay?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His head snapped up at a jarring speed, “Oh, like you care.” The ice in his voice should have frozen Al to the spot, but it only broke his heart further. His tone was there, the comment alone made Ophelia roll her eyes and Teddy clench his fists, but the tears welling in his green eyes and the way his hands shook didn’t go unnoticed by Al. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, I get it,” Al whispered and backed up, giving him some room to breathe. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instinctively, Al turned to watch Cas, she looked shell shocked. He wasn’t sure if it was because they were about to take on more Horcruxes or if it was because Scorpius Malfoy’s well of fear and pain started to bubble over the surface. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas snapped out of her trance, and for the second time that night squared her shoulders and set her jaw. “So, are we going to do this?” Al did his best to stay upright and ignore the way his stomach dropped to his slippers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia trudged across the room to stand next to Cas, she grabbed her hand, “I’m with you, I’m always with you.” They shared a soft smile that said a thousand words, “Let’s get these bastards.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Despite the fact that Al’s stomach was churning and his chest was already starting to feel heavy at the thought of leaving Jonah behind, he knew his answer. There was no way he was going to let his friends, his </span>
  <em>
    <span>family,</span>
  </em>
  <span> do this without him. He tried to focus on the feeling he had had at the beginning of the year when they all met up at the train station. Reunited, this is where he belonged. He was going to do this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, you know I’m in.” Al forced a grin, “Someone has to keep an eye on you two.” He moved to grab Cas’ hand. The three of them may have been linked by their hands but they all knew there was so much more connecting them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy was still pacing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius had his head back in his hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then something happened that had Al trying to keep his jaw from dropping. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas let go of their hands and moved towards Scorpius. She stood in front of him, a safe distance away, she watched him warily, like she wasn’t sure if he was going to spring up and attack her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Look, Malfoy,” She started, her tone was neutral and Al was proud at how calm she sounded. He knew her insides must be writhing almost as much as his were. “When all this shit started, I told you we were in this together. And even though you’ve done an absolute shit job at showing it, like, I mean a </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit</span>
  </em>
  <span> job, that still stands. If you do this. You won’t be alone. You’ll still be an asshole, and you’ll still have ditched us and treated us like dirt, and you’ll still be dating that sad, </span>
  <em>
    <span>sad,</span>
  </em>
  <span> excuse for a girl, but you won’t be alone. And we may not like it, but we’re not gonna ditch you the way you ditched us. You do this and you won’t be alone.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked up, meeting her gaze for a split second before his walls came soaring back up. “Well,” He stood, brushing the imaginary dust off of his jeans, and wrapping his old leather jacket tightly around himself. As if that could spare him from Cas’ eyes, “after a pep talk like that how could I say no?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And that was that. Cas went back to stand in between Al and Ophelia and Scorpius crossed his arms. Both of them showing the group that the moment of weakness would not become a regular occurrence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Loudmouth?” Ophelia’s nickname got the boy to stop pacing, maybe it was just Ophelia’s voice in general. “You in?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His hands flew to his bright hair and he tugged lightly, “Phe…” He met her eyes briefly before training his gaze back on the floor, “I-I don’t know.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean, you don’t know?” Al could tell she was trying to hold back the fear in her voice, but he was pretty sure Teddy picked it up based on how he moved to stand in front of her. He reached a hand out, almost like he wanted to touch her shoulder, but pulled back as if realizing what he was doing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All of his nervous energy was coming out in tapping his fingers against his chest and stepping side to side in place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean </span>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t know</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” He wrung his hands. “Do you even know what you're asking? Do you know what we’ll have to give up, what we’ll have to leave?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Woah. It was like he was reading Al’s mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course</span>
  </em>
  <span> I do. But that doesn’t change the fact that we’re the only ones that can save th-the world, our </span>
  <em>
    <span>school,</span>
  </em>
  <span> our families, </span>
  <em>
    <span>ourselves</span>
  </em>
  <span>, from this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that really true though?” Teddy challenged and Al couldn’t decipher if Ophelia wanted to slap him or hug Teddy more. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We made a pact.” Ophelia’s voice was deadly calm, and her hands were pasted to her sides to keep them from shaking. “We agreed, </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew that</span>
  </em>
  <span> we were the only ones who could do this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy stared her down, Ophelia didn’t recoil. She met his gaze with a fierceness that terrified and impressed Al. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit.” He exclaimed, “Shit, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Phe.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Ophelia placed her hands on his shoulders, immediately, he stilled. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>What</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not as easy for me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia’s eyebrows shot up and she drew her hands back, “You think it’s easy for us?” She gestured around the room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, you know that’s not what I meant.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then what the hell did </span>
  <em>
    <span>you mean?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy took in a short, loud breath, “I’m a seventh year” He exclaimed as if that explained everything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No shit, Loudmouth.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy rolled his eyes, and then his demeanor changed, and, for the first time, Al saw his boisterous, overly confident cousin, second guess himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have my N.E.W.T.S this year.” He said it so quietly Al almost missed it. “I don’t wanna, y’know, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fail</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia exhaled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re such a Loudmouth, Loudmouth.” She pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose, completely oblivious to the fact that Teddy was watching her like she was the most beautiful thing on the planet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” His voice dropped again, “I actually, y’know, kinda wanna pass. I wanna do something with my life.” Al guessed that that statement held a lot more significance than he knew, Ophelia didn’t try to hide the smile that had started to form on her lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can tutor you.” Teddy raised an eyebrow. “We’ll go full out homeschool. Trust me, you’ll be ready to take your N.E.W.T.S at the end of the year when we get back.” Teddy huffed and looked at the ground. Clearly not believing her, she moved to place both her hand on his shoulders, once again, stealing all of his attention. “And we </span>
  <em>
    <span>will</span>
  </em>
  <span> get back.” She said steadily, but Al could tell she was convincing the room, and herself, just as much as she was convincing Teddy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He exhaled and rocked back on his heels, Ophelia let her arms fall, “Okay then, I hope you know what you’re signing up for.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think I can handle it.” She joked lightly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then let’s beat these little shits so I can get back to being the stellar student I am.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas let out a short, sarcastic laugh, “Okay, sure, let’s go with that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I hate to interrupt the truly </span>
  <em>
    <span>heartwarming</span>
  </em>
  <span> banter, but how in the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> are we supposed to do this?” Scorpius interjected. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia shrugged, “Although the delivery left something, no, </span>
  <em>
    <span>a lot</span>
  </em>
  <span>, to be desired, he does have a point.” She waited for everyone’s gaze to fall on her. “Okay, so, I think we still need to go through with our original plan.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So we’re still breaking into the creepy, probably haunted, Chamber of Secrets?” Cas whined. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Ophelia said dismissively, already moving on to the next topic, “Now, I’ll need to practice it, but I’m pretty sure I can learn the bottomless bag spell Hermione used when they left. We’re all going to have to work on collecting living supplies, so, tents, food, bedding,” She hesitated, “medical supplies, y’know, the basics.” The room groaned, and Al felt the phantom aches of where he had been injured last year.  “So, everyone keep their eyes out for that and take everything you can. Teddy, since you’re so close to the kitchens I think you’ll probably be the best to get food once we get closer to leaving.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They all nodded numbly. Ophelia let out a breathless laugh, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>But</span>
  </em>
  <span>, before we worry about all that, let’s get some sleep.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas snorted, “Like I’ll be able to sleep.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Teddy joined, “Sleep, what a funny concept.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al laughed along as they crept out of the library, unable to get away from the worry that thinking about Jonah brought. He was everything Al had ever wished for, everything he wanted. Why should he have to let that go? Why should he have to hurt both of them in the process? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al shook off thoughts of Jonah’s mouth on his and tried to stop the sound of his musical laugh playing in his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had a lot more pressing matters to focus on. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had a lot of work to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Al really hoped that their story wouldn’t end as a goddamn tragedy. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Have you seen this?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia slammed a copy of the Daily Prophet in front of Cas’ plate at breakfast before plopping in the seat next to her dramatically. If what was on the front page of the paper wasn’t so disturbing, Cas might have laughed. Instead, Cas’ stomach swooped and she instantly felt like she had to hold back the bile rising in the back of her throat. The headline read: </span>
  <b>
    <em>Mass Death Eater Breakout from Legendary Prison, Azkaban. (Names have yet to be released) </em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is this for real?” Cas asked stupidly. Of course, she knew it was real, Ophelia would never pull something like this. It just felt so much easier to entertain the idea that her life wasn’t real. That for a second she could pretend all of this was just one cruel joke. That the boy she was in love with </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>hate her and </span>
  <em>
    <span>wasn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>dating another girl. That she </span>
  <em>
    <span>wasn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> about to leave school to go hunt down deadly Horcruxes willingly, and, now the cherry on top, that there</span>
  <em>
    <span> weren’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>murderous legends from the Second Wizarding War on the loose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Obviously,” Ophelia answered her question as she swung her legs onto the bench next to Cas. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, let me rephrase. What the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> does this mean?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia rubbed her eyes and chewed her lip, she was beginning to look more and more tired the closer they got to leaving. “I dunno Cas.” She mumbled through her fingers, Cas placed a hand on her best friend's shoulder. Providing whatever little comfort she could. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you think it has something to do with the Horcruxes?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know.” She sighed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you think they might target the school?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another sigh, “I don’t know, Cas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Should we do something?</span>
  <em>
    <span> Warn</span>
  </em>
  <span> someone?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t know, Cas.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas took the hint. She didn’t blame her, she knew Ophelia was just overwhelmed, she took a turn and sighed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” Cas wrapped the slightly taller girl in a brief hug, “I’ll see you in class, Phelia. Try not to worry ‘bout it, we can’t control them, just how we react.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Since when are you all wise?” Ophelia whined and she reassured Cas with a weak smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas shrugged “Always have been.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm, okay.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll see you in class, k?” Cas asked as she got up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’ day went by like any other. Her and Ophelia joked their way through classes, Cas watched in amusement, and slight frustration, when her face turned an astonishing pink at the touch of Teddy’s hands. He had snuck up on her in halls, a regular ritual that Cas had noticed. She purposefully kept her head down during classes with the Slytherins and a certain couple. Making a point to ignore everything Scorpius and Dicky. Dazing off while she and Ophelia attempted to study, all the while consumed by the thought of the Death Eaters. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Throughout her whole day, the same question kept repeating itself: How could she fix this? She wished she had a way to make sure the school was safe after they left. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The answer literally ran into her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the--” She stumbled back as she ran into a wall of human, “Excuse you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe you should watch where you're going then, Weasel.”  She recognized the voice instantly and felt her lips crack a smile. As soon as she made contact with his steady, gray gaze she knew she could trust him with everything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m pretty sure </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> ran into </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Chance.” Cas bumped her shoulder into his side as they fell into step, slowly climbing their way up to the Gryffindor Corridor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right.” He drew out the word and let his mouth quirk up into a crooked grin as he carded his fingers through his dark hair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They fell into a comfortable silence as they took the stairs by twos. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, Cas worked up the nerve to break the silence, she could trust him. Milo was her teammate. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Listen, uh, Chance” He caught her eye, glancing down nervously at her. They didn’t <em>ever</em> have serious conversations. Their whole relationship was built on jokes, Quidditch, trash-talking, and rants about anything and everything, but never anything serious. “I kinda have to tell you something.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh joy,” He scratched the back of his neck, “this doesn’t sound sinister at all.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She ignored his comment and plowed on, “I’m running away from Hogwarts.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He threw his head back and laughed out loud. Cas waited until his laughter quieted, “Wait, you’re not joking?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She really wished she was. </span>
</p><p><span>Cas launched into a very elaborate explanation of the last year of her life, she explained how it all started, Harry Potter’s scar started hurting. Ophelia and her first encounter with Nagini, she explained how they got visions and how they had to break into the library to translate the Parseltongue. She told him how they planned to get Teddy, Al, and Scorpius (Milo made a point to roll his eyes at the mention of his name) to help them take down Nagini. He cringed when she explained in gory detail how that </span><em><span>didn’t </span></em><span>really</span> <span>work out for them. </span></p><p>
  <span>She moved on to this year and all the nightmarish events that had happened so far. Leading up to a couple of nights ago, with their whole group deciding that they were going to be the ones to track down the Horcruxes and stop them from bringing Voldemort back. It took Milo a couple of minutes to gather enough words to speak after Cas’ tale. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So other than proving to me that you and your friends are the most insane wizards at this school,” He tried to joke, but he didn’t hide his fear as well as he hoped, “what was your point in telling me all of this?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that brings me to the next chapter of this </span>
  <em>
    <span>awesome </span>
  </em>
  <span>story.” She ignored Milo’s “oh joy” and kept going, “A whole bunch of famous Death Eaters escaped Azkaban recently, like yesterday. And I’m really, </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> sure that it’s not a coincidence.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Unfortunately, you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>probably</span>
  </em>
  <span> right.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So as long as they are out there I can’t help but feel like the school is in danger.” Cas lowered her voice as they entered the common room. Luckily it was empty for the most part. They moved to sit on a plush, red couch. “Like </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re</span>
  </em>
  <span> in danger, so, y’know, I wanted you to at least have a heads up.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aww, Weasel...you care.” He messed up her hair, the action held a significant amount of affection that made Cas’ heart swell and crack at the thought of leaving. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, well don’t get ahead of yourself, cause I need you to do something for me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I should’ve known you wanted something.” He shook his head in mock disappointment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh calm down, I just need you to keep an eye out.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo cocked an eyebrow, “Keep an eye out? What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, I trust you. I trust you to be able to just watch, make sure everything stays </span>
  <em>
    <span>okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and if it doesn’t you’ll take care of it. You could even recruit people, people you trust, people who can handle it, and help.” When she was met with silence she rushed to explain her big ask. “I know it’s a lot and it’s totally unfair of me to ask you this. But our parents, the teachers, they all already took their turn and we need to be in this together as the students. And if you could help, it could make the difference between keeping everyone safe and not. And I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>so, so</span>
  </em>
  <span> sorry. It’s so much to ask...trust me I know. Putting you in danger is the last thing I wanna do.” To Cas’ horror, her voice broke, and all the pent up anxiety and paralyzing fear caught up with her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, hey, Cas, no you’re ok, come here,” He lifted his arm for Cas to crawl under, the comfortable weight of his arm draping around her calmed her slightly. It wasn’t a completely foreign action, occasionally when they walked together he would drape his arm around her to make fun of how much taller he was. But this meant so much more than a stupid joke, this was Milo being there for Cas, and Cas realizing what an amazing friend Milo is. “We’re teammates, we’re in this together...I’ll be your spy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas sniffled. “I never said you get to be a spy” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He squeezed her closer, “Oh no, I’m totally a spy now.” He rubbed her back soothingly as she choked out a half-sob, half-laugh. “And my little crew of spies can be called Milo’s Angels.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas knew what he was trying to do, and as she slowly regained control of her breathing under the weight of his arm all she could be was grateful. Grateful for Milo, and his ridiculous methods of getting her mood to lift. She had no idea how long they stayed there, both deep in thought but focusing on the comforting presence of the other. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Milo?” Her voice croaked, Cas couldn’t remember the last time she had gotten so close to crying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?” He whispered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks.” His chest vibrated under her head as he chuckled softly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s like you said, Weasel. We have to stick together. We’re teammates, it’s what we do.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn,” Cas reluctantly let her smile return, “and here I thought you were doing it because we were becoming besties.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo sighed overdramatically, “Well, this is awkward then.” She punched his chest lightly as their quiet laughter died, and for a second she let her mind be grateful, hopeful even. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Grateful for Milo. Grateful for the fact that he was going to be there for her, and hope bubbled up in her chest as she realized that no matter how </span>
  <em>
    <span>terrifyingly</span>
  </em>
  <span> hard this was going to be she wouldn’t be alone. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ophelia climbed towards the Gryffindor common room one step at a time, taking a deep breath as she ascended the stairway up through the tower. Her day at school had been good, but a long one. After classes had finished for the day, Ophelia and Cas had headed for Quidditch practice, meeting Jonah, Milo, and the rest of the team and practicing long and hard for the first games of the season that were fast approaching. Cas, Milo, and Jonah had stuck around after practice to mess around, goofing off which was apparently “very important” in their opinion. Not having the energy to join in the antics today, Ophelia had changed quickly and headed off to the library to study for an hour or two. Al and Teddy were off somewhere else, probably together, definitely doing something they shouldn’t be doing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She really hoped it didn’t have anything to do with the Giant Squid this time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, Ophelia couldn’t help but feel as if none of it meant anything. Behind everything, every project, smile, practice, or test, there was lingering anticipation for what was to come.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And the fear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Entranced in her thoughts, she nearly tripped when the staircase leveled out. As she rounded the corner to the common room corridor, Ophelia literally bumped into someone else traveling the other direction. Stumbling back, Ophelia stuttered out several apologies, as did the mystery stranger. Rubbing her eyes to clear her head, Ophelia looked up to identify who she’d collided with--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And came face to face with none other than Dicky.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, Vicky.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She seemed to be having the same epiphany, her apologetic glance quickly morphing into a disgusted smirk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, well, well,” she seethed. “Look who it is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why are you---”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would say ‘fancy seeing you here’, but I don’t exactly fancy anything about this little interaction of ours.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia felt her face start to heat up with anger. “What are you doing up here, Vicky? Shouldn’t you be back underground with the rest of the snakes?” Vicky gave her an all too perfect sneer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Heading down there now, actually. I was just popping upstairs to the Lion’s den to say hello to your friend Cassianne.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia’s hands curled into fists. “What the hell did you do---”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y’know, I never realized how fragile she was.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vicky smiled all too sweetly. She knew she was getting somewhere. “Sure, she puts on a great act, but all you have to do is find the one thing that’ll get under her skin, make her snap, and then--well, then, it’s way too easy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You vile, disgusting, absolute leech of a--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She giggled evilly. “Oh, and don’t even get me started on you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You think you’re really something, don’t you? The teacher’s pet, the Quidditch player. You with your glasses and your good grades, your perfect track record. You think that just because of that, you’re above everyone else in this stupid school, but I’ve figured you out, Lovegood. You’re scared. You’ve always been scared. You’re not as perfect as everyone thinks, and furthermore--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Furthermore? Is this your dissertation speech?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re in love with Teddy Lupin.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That stopped her. Cut off her words, froze her to the spot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vicky smirked. “There it is. You think you’re so special because suddenly, the infamous Teddy Lupin is giving you the time of day. But,” she added, pronouncing her words very carefully. “Do you really think he feels the same way about you? You’re nothing new to him. Just the starstruck girl pining after everything he pretends to be. He’s giving you attention for a day or two, but soon he’ll get bored and up and leave once he’s done with you. You’re just another one of his conquests.” she spat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Leave,” was all she could grind out. “I don’t care what you think, or who the hell you think you are to waltz in here and screw up everybody’s lives, just get out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For once, it’s my pleasure.” Vicky pushed past Ophelia, flying lightly down the stairs. The fading sounds of her footsteps dug into Ophelia’s self-esteem, chipping away at her confidence and making her increasingly worried about what she would find when she reached Cas in the common room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Walking faster and faster down the corridor, Ophelia slowly but surely transferred to a run, eventually breaking into a full sprint, breathing out the password to the common room, vaulting herself inside, then slowing her pace to climb the stairs to the girl’s dormitory, and in turn, the room she shared with Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was sitting in front of the mirror. Ophelia glanced urgently around the room, searching for any signs of disruption or chaos, of anything Vicky might’ve ruined. Yet...she found nothing. The room looked the same: manageably messy, the beds unmade, the curtains drawn, the desks tidy for the most part, a few clothes strewn everywhere, and Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe Vicky had just been messing with her. Trying to get under her skin. If that was the case, Cas might not even know she had been up here in the first place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was all so, so complex and confusing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi, Cas!” she started somewhat tentatively.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia took a few steps forward, so she could almost see her own reflection in the mirror. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That seemed to snap her out of it. “Oh, hey Phelia. How was studying?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was alright. Did you guys have a fun time after practice ended?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, we had a good time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cool,” Ophelia shifted her weight from foot to foot, deciding to cut right to the chase. “Hey, did you know I ran into Vicky on the wait up here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>To her dismay, Ophelia could see Cas visibly tense up. “Oh, really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That's when she saw them. The two stacks of paper sitting neatly next to each other on the floor by Cas. One stack was composed of what seemed to be all pictures. Moving pictures, as was expected. The other stack was all small scraps of paper with handwritten notes on them, varying in size. Ophelia closed the difference, crouching down and thumbing through a few of the photos.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And suddenly, she knew what had happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All of Vicky’s comments about finding the one thing that would get under Cas’s skin made sense.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>These were all pictures of Scorpius and Vicky. Some were posed of course, so as to make for a bigger supply, and a few were repeated, but some...some of the larger photos were clearly candid, something another friend must have taken. Scorpius, arm around Vicky, eyes crossed, tongue half sticking out adorably as she turned to him, throwing her head back in laughter. Scorpius and another boy (Ophelia didn’t know his name, something Zabini) on opposite sides of Vicky, kissing her cheeks as she grinned. Scorpius laughing. Scorpius and Vicky waltzing to imaginary music that was just in their heads. Scorpius and Vicky throwing snowballs at each other in the courtyard. Scorpius.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius, apparently, happy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia tore through the notes next. While many just held doodles of hearts, whether broken or whole, some bigger scraps held longer notes, things such as “aren’t we cute?” or “what exactly</span>
  <em>
    <span> is</span>
  </em>
  <span> that face, Scorpius?” The one she found at the bottom of the stack, though, made her blood boil and her stomach turn.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It looked wrinkled as if Cas had crumpled it and smoothed it out again. The words were in neat cursive, lilting across the parchment. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hi Cassianne! (what a name! It’s so...charming)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just wanted to drop by and leave you a little gift to remind you of what you’re missing. What you’ll never have more like. Thanks for being too much of a coward to make a move so I could have Scorpius all to myself. Look how happy we are! Hurts, doesn’t it? Seeing someone else have something you never will? Anyway, enjoy the pictures! Leave them hanging if you’re especially desperate. :)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>XOXO, Vicky.</span>
  </em>
</p><p><span>Ophelia tossed the paper to the side so as to keep from ripping it. She looked up to find Cas’s reflection in the mirror. </span> <span>“She did this to you?”</span></p><p>
  <span>Focusing on the Mirror Cas, Ophelia was surprised to see how vacant she looked. Not sad, not scared, not even mad. Just empty.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you think I should grow out my hair?” was her only reply.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“W</span>
  <em>
    <span>-what</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’s fingertips ghosted the ends of her hair. “I mean, it </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> a little choppy. Too uneven, y’ know? If I let it get longer and maybe even it up a bit, it would look </span>
  <em>
    <span>a lot </span>
  </em>
  <span>better. I mean, I can’t do </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything</span>
  </em>
  <span> with it! I can’t even put it up without little pieces falling out. It’s infuriating.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, since when do you not like your--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“O-or </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Cas continued, interrupting Ophelia, her voice beginning to break. “M-maybe hair dye would be better. I mean, how hard would it be, with magic and everything? Probably not...not </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Maybe it would look better if it wasn’t so </span>
  <em>
    <span>bright</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span>, whatever she did or said to you, you have to understand it’s all lies, right? None of that stuff is true.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe not to </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Cas managed to choke out. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Or Al, or Teddy, or Jonah, or Milo or--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>That’s not the point</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” Cas ran her fingers through her hair, almost tugging at it as if to pull all of it out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean? We all know that all of that is bullshit, we all believe it’s a lie, we--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span> doesn’t!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ah.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-no, I don’t care...</span>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t care</span>
  </em>
  <span>, somehow, something about her makes him choose her. Every. Single. Damn.</span>
  <em>
    <span> Time</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I don’t know what it is, I don’t care, but I </span>
  <em>
    <span>have</span>
  </em>
  <span> to...I h-have to be doing something wrong because no matter how horrible she is, he never does anything. He just sits there and </span>
  <em>
    <span>loves</span>
  </em>
  <span> her like he means it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, you don’t know if he loves her. They haven’t been together that long, and he can’t be </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>blind to how--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Except that’s what he </span>
  <em>
    <span>does</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” her volume was rising by the second. “He falls in love and he draws you in and he makes you feel like </span>
  <em>
    <span>somebody</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and it’s not just about that, it’s about being a somebody to</span>
  <em>
    <span> him</span>
  </em>
  <span>, because not a lot of people are. And then one day he decides that you’re too much. You’re coming off too strong, he can’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>handle </span>
  </em>
  <span>it anymore, so he leaves. He leaves and he moves on and he falls in love again. With </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia moved to sit beside Cas, able to look at her actual face instead of the wavering mirror image. “Cas, just because Scorpius did that to you doesn’t make you too much at </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span>! You have to understand that </span>
  <em>
    <span>none of this is your fault, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he chose to shut you out the minute you told him a little about how you felt, and he just threw everything you had away. Vicky isn’t any better than you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course </span>
  </em>
  <span>I know that!” Cas practically screamed. “I know that because I would never stoop to this level to get back at someone who never did anything to me, I would never choose to make certain people’s lives </span>
  <em>
    <span>miserable</span>
  </em>
  <span> just because it’s</span>
  <em>
    <span> fun</span>
  </em>
  <span> or it makes me</span>
  <em>
    <span> feel good </span>
  </em>
  <span>about myself because they fear me, I know, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>k-know</span>
  </em>
  <span> I’m better. I know she’s horrible and</span>
  <em>
    <span> evil </span>
  </em>
  <span>and no one ever deserves that but somehow, </span>
  <em>
    <span>somehow </span>
  </em>
  <span>he still likes her better. He’s not </span>
  <em>
    <span>him </span>
  </em>
  <span>around her, she doesn’t know all the little things we know, she doesn’t have his</span>
  <em>
    <span> goddamn scarf</span>
  </em>
  <span>---s-she hasn’t been through all of this </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit </span>
  </em>
  <span>with him and for some reason, </span>
  <em>
    <span>some reason</span>
  </em>
  <span> he still prefers her. I don’t know what I did--a-actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>you know what</span>
  </em>
  <span>? I do. I screwed everything up because I thought that for some reason he might feel the same way. And I scared him away and he rebounds with her and he stays with </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span> and sometimes he seems...</span>
  <em>
    <span>happy.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>And I don’t know what I should’ve done, what I can do to make him see that he’s wrong, but hey--hey,</span>
  <em>
    <span> h-hey</span>
  </em>
  <span> why would he even choose me? I’m so</span>
  <em>
    <span> loud</span>
  </em>
  <span>, my hair is the first thing you notice in a room, I laugh about the weirdest things, I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>way</span>
  </em>
  <span> too sarcastic for my own good and probably way too bold but I don’t care...I d-didn’t care because </span>
  <em>
    <span>that’s me</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but--I don’t know!” her voice cracked, her volume dissipating quickly and being reduced to a near whisper. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>How can someone be too much and not enough at the same time?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As Ophelia glanced back to the mirror, she realized that Cas was crying. Not hard, not yet, but Ophelia could see the tears falling, her best friend’s shoulders shaking softly from sobs she held back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, no.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>how this was supposed to happen.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This is not how this goes.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>This is </span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Cas who’s always there for others in their darkest moments. Cas who </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> the shoulder to cry on. Cas who feels everything </span>
  <em>
    <span>so deeply all the fucking time</span>
  </em>
  <span> and yet never lets it show because she refuses to put herself before others. Too stubborn to ask for help.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This wasn’t good. This wasn’t Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span> fucking fault. Vicky’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>N-</span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It was </span>
  <em>
    <span>his.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia pulled Cas into a tight hug. She let her rest there, let the tears soak her collar until she knew what the hell she was going to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This couldn’t go unnoticed. There was </span>
  <em>
    <span>no way</span>
  </em>
  <span> she was letting them get away with this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Letting go, she met Cas’s eyes. “Stay here. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I love you</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I’ll be back soon, just give me a second. I need to have a few conversations.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stood on shaky legs, essentially floated through the shock down the stairs and into the common room. Her intention was to go straight for Slytherin, but she could barely make it to the couch before collapsing, her head falling with a </span>
  <em>
    <span>thud</span>
  </em>
  <span> into her hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wasn’t sure how long she sat there before footsteps interrupted the pained silence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s fine, she thought. They don’t know me, they’ll leave me alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia?” asked a surprisingly familiar voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al?” She turned slowly to look over the back of the couch, noticing that both Al and Jonah were staring back at her, seemingly very concerned. “What are you doing here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al laughed without emotion. “Hanging out with Jonah, obviously.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow. “You mean eating Jonah’s face?”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He ignored her. “Jonah was just walking me out, </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but then we saw you looking quite...distressed? Is everything alright?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia debated lying. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>No,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” she breathed out, standing and walking over to the boys, “Everything isn’t okay, it’s...it’s Cas.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah’s eyebrows furrowed; Al’s expression morphed into that of apprehensive confusion. “What do you mean it’s Cas?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It all came tumbling out of her mouth so fast. “Vicky--she was...was here, she pulled this fucking horrible prank on Cas, with these pictures and this...this note. It was absolutely disgusting and I hate her for it, but...but I didn’t expect it to be this bad.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Bad? Bad how?” Jonah asked, taking a small step forward. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, she’s...</span>
  <em>
    <span>hurt,</span>
  </em>
  <span> and well, u-understandably so but...I’ve never seen her this destroyed, guys. I mean, she’s...she’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>crying</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al essentially choked on air. “Come again?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s actually crying, I--I’ve </span>
  <em>
    <span>never </span>
  </em>
  <span>seen her cry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al’s demeanor had completely shifted. “I...I’ve known Cas my entire life and I’ve barely seen her cry.” The pieces seemed to fall into place for Al, as he quieted down into something like a very, very quiet hatred. “This is all his fault.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly!” Ophelia tore a hand through her hair, looking around the room as if answers would suddenly appear written on the walls. “I don’t know what to do, Al, I mean....I thought things were looking up, y’ know, for this whole situation? Sure, he was still snogging Dicky and everything, but he was actually starting to act decently again, act like himself. And with what we have to do now, I mean, he was---how are we supposed to trust him or even tolerate him now that this has happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t fucking know!” Al almost yelled, “I...I don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Phelia. I don’t know how this changes things, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just then, they were interrupted by the sound of the portrait hole being opened. Shifting her gaze, Ophelia was surprised to see an out of breath Jonah climb through.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had no idea he’d even left.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Behind him followed an equally tired and extremely more confused Teddy Lupin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What-</span>
  </em>
  <span>-” Al stuttered what Ophelia had most definitely been thinking. “Where did you go?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“To find backup, of course.” he shoved Teddy forward. Ophelia stumbled back and nearly fell over the back of the couch. “Tell him what you told me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia haltingly repeated herself. She recounted the events of bumping into Vicky, finding Cas, seeing the pictures, and the notes. What Cas had said, what had happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a few split seconds, Teddy lost it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He paced around the room, post haste, muttering some very creative curses and gesturing widely with his hands although no one else in the room could tell what he was trying to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy--” she cautioned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is completely </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucked</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” he exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. “I--I can’t believe this is happening, I mean--” he took a deep breath. “There was this one time. James and I pulled a prank on Cas during a Christmas visit. It was horrible, really mean, we...we messed up her whole room and everything! I think she was...probably seven or eight. And still, even then, no matter how annoying we were, how many of her things we stole or vandalized or </span>
  <em>
    <span>ruined</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she never cried. I’ve never--I...I can’t believe this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Ophelia saw it. The pain behind his eyes, the pressure in his voice, on the verge of breaking. His own pain, knife twisted by every wrong or shitty move Scorpius or Vicky made. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry, Loudmouth.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He continued on. “How is she now? Is she still upstairs?” Before Ophelia could answer, he cut himself off and turned to her. “Actually…” his head tilted slightly, his brows so close together they almost connected. “Are you okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded, swallowing thickly. “Yeah. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah,</span>
  </em>
  <span> of course, I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He made eye contact for a second longer, raising a single brow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, okay</span>
  <em>
    <span> maybe</span>
  </em>
  <span> Vicky did...say some things to me, that wasn’t exactly...fun to hear.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She could see Teddy clench his teeth. “Phelia, what did she say to you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia blurted everything out, about school and grades and being above everything, not being who she seemed. “A-and then,” Phelia laughed almost hysterically, “she went on and on about how I think I’m special because you’re friends with me...that you’re only giving me the time of day for a while and then you’re just going to...leave.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a moment or two, Teddy was completely silent. “Phe…” he managed. That was it. All she could do was stand there, look at his bright hair, the silver cartilage piercing in his ear glinting in the firelight, his worried eyes, his soft yet concerned smile…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stepped closer to her. “You know none of that is true, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t make herself keep eye contact. Looking to the floor, Ophelia tried to forget Teddy’s wondering eyes on her. “I know...it’s just…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” he put a hand to her cheek, softly turning her head to face him, “You’re not getting rid of me anytime soon.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She leaned into his palm. “Oh, </span>
  <em>
    <span>joy</span>
  </em>
  <span>, spending more of my existence with you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He slapped her lightly. “Rude! I’m actively caring about you, shut up.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia laughed in spite of herself, but a few seconds of silence apart from Al and Jonah muttering in the corner brought her back to reality.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We need to do something.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, no </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Al spoke up, “But what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m going to talk to him.” She pulled on an extra sweater she had left on a coat rack the day before. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I swear</span>
  </em>
  <span>, when I’m done with him--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phe, no.” to her surprise, Teddy placed a steadying hand on her shoulder. “Cas needs you right now. You can’t leave her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Al tacked on. “As much as I wish I could be there for her right now, Cas needs you, Phelia. You have to </span>
  <em>
    <span>be there.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” she let herself nod. “Okay, </span>
  <em>
    <span>okay,</span>
  </em>
  <span> but what about--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll go,” Teddy assured her. “We’ll go, we’ll track the little </span>
  <em>
    <span>bitch</span>
  </em>
  <span> down, and we’ll make him wish he’d never been born. He’ll never want to see the light of day again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, not </span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly </span>
  </em>
  <span>how I would’ve worded it, but yeah. Pretty much.” Al mentioned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Holding up only a finger in response, telling them to wait, Ophelia raced back up the stairs. She spared Cas a few more kind words before grabbing a few of the pictures and Vicky’s note before returning to Al, Jonah, and Teddy. Al was busy assuring Jonah he didn’t need to get involved, and the Potter’s counterpart begrudgingly agreed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy and Al surveyed the room. “Well, when we get back, make sure to help us bury the body--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy!” Al punched him in the arm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stumbled back dramatically. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Agh</span>
  </em>
  <span>! I’ve been wounded!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even now, he was ever the Loudmouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Giving Ophelia a quick, reassuring smile, Teddy held the portrait ajar, letting Al step out and quickly following. Jonah retreated back up the stairs to his dormitory, and Ophelia began to head back up to Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, not yet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>First, hot chocolate for the both of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Second, a promise to herself that she would never let anyone forgive this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, a last look towards the portrait hole, knowing something had changed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hoped, at the very least, </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> would be safe. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius strolled through the corridors, winding through the castle with no real sense of direction. He often did this when he had the time; it was a chance to clear his head. A chance, he remembered, was one he seldom got anymore. What with classes and projects and planning for a fucking suicide mission and Vicky...he had been quite busy lately.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned down a smaller corridor, one completely abandoned and empty. He let his eyes fall to the stone floor under his feet, retreating into his thoughts and letting them wander to places he usually tried to forget were actually part of his mind. Places where he let the darkness grow like weeds, places where he neglected to clean away the cobwebs of doubt and fear...and slightly brighter places. Clean, fresh places filled with friends and laughter and happiness and…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, at this point, he barely had to think at all to know where this train of thought was going.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, his focus on the cobblestone was interrupted as his shoulders were grabbed and turned, forcing him roughly up against the tapestry behind him. Reflexively, Scorpius pulled his wand out of his pocket and held it firmly against the aggressor’s throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t fucking try anything with that, Malfoy.” The voice made him realize who had actually pinned him to the wall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was...Teddy? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was...well, confusing as hell, to say the least.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sliding his wand back to its resting place, Scorpius looked around Teddy’s figure and noticed that he wasn’t alone. Al stalked up behind the blue-haired boy, quiet and unwavering, but Scorpius knew him well enough to recognize that something was off. To see the quiet simmer of his rage.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What was going on?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It seemed as though Teddy would have no problem helping him find the answer to that question. “Why the hell would you do that, you little piece of shit?” he growled, shoving Scorpius into the wall again and making his back and head ache.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, what do you mean? W-what did I even--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t try to fucking play dumb!” he yelled hysterically, “You know what you did and you know you can’t get away with it you--you bastard?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius shook his head experimentally from side to side, as if trying to clear water from his ears. What could possibly have happened that could make Teddy and Al think he was behind it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Choosing instead to turn to Al, Scorpius met the green-eyed boy’s gaze.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al only turned away, making the pit in the bottom of Scorpius’s stomach grow even deeper. He took a steadying breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy...I don’t know what you think I did, but I need you to tell me what the hell happened!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why would I do that? You’re the one behind this bullshit!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius groaned. “Innocent until proven guilty, isn’t that it?” to his surprise, Al spoke up, his tone filled with malice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m pretty sure you’re guilty enough for our standards, thanks.” Scorpius felt his eyebrows fly sky high.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you think I---what did I do?” Teddy grumbled something that sounded, by nature, very offensive. He released Scorpius, but didn’t step back, effectively caging him in with confusion and silent threats.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You and your little girlfriend paid us a visit up in the Gryffindor tower. Left some...gifts for Cas.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What did Cas have to do with this?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We did what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy shoved a piece of crumpled paper into his hands. Scorpius opened it and smoothed it out, just to find a note written in very familiar handwriting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He read the note.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then he read it again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t until his fourth pass through that Scorpius’ thoughts caught up to his shock.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hated that the first question that came to his mind was whether it was true.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not what had happened, no, of course not. But if...if this really had some negative effect on Cas, that had to mean….she felt...she really had to feel that somehow, even after everything--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, no. He couldn’t let his mind go there. Useless daydreams had gotten bad places before. Places he never wanted to see again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>More thoughts flooded through his conscience. It took him a second for him to realize what this all meant.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vicky wrote this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was her note. She wrote this note to Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His brain was working a mile a minute, pulling memories out of the framework of his mind until he remembered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He remembered, and the pit in his stomach swallowed him whole.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It all made horrible, grotesque sense.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Hey, boo?” Tori called to him from across the common room. He had been sprawled out on the couch, flipping through a book he had no serious intention of reading when she interrupted his deep silence. Turning onto his stomach and looking over at her, he arched an eyebrow at her smug expression.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What is it?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Well...I had a really fun idea. I thought maybe you could help.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>As much as Scorpius wanted to reassure her that no, he most definitely could not and did not want to help, he said nothing. He sat there in choked silence and she skipped over to him, pulling up a chair and sitting beside him. She pulled out a few pictures and handed them over excitedly. Scorpius looked over them.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>They were all pictures of the two of them.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He hadn’t yet caught on, but Scorpius was dually sure that he was not going to like the outcome. “What’s all this?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She grinned. “This is my genius idea, Scorpius. I propose...we pull a little prank.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah, he was definitely not liking this. “A prank? For who?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh, no one...just your little friend Cassianne.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius had to stop himself from gasping. He, instead, opted for a breathy laugh. “Why on earth would you want to do that?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh, I don’t know, because she’s so...her.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>That word held a lot more hatred than it should’ve.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“O-okay.” It made sense to find out what Tori was planning before he got seriously worried, right? “What do these pictures have to do with it?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Well, I was thinking we could get a bunch of these. Maybe even take some more, I’m not sure. And then,” she leaned forward for added effect, “We sneak into the Gryffindor Common room, post these all over the walls of her room, just everywhere, to piss her off. Get under her skin a little.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius completely blanched. “W-why would you do that?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She laughed. She laughed, as if it were the stupidest question she’d ever been asked. “Because it’s funny, of course! Live a little.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No, I will most definitely not be abiding by your definition of “living a little”.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p><em><span>“No?”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>Scorpius was just as surprised at the word that fell over his lips as Tori sounded. </span></em></p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yet, he was proud.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And certain.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No, I don’t want you to do that. I won’t let you do that.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She looked seriously repulsed. “Why not?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Because that’s petty as shit, and I don’t want you to do that to her, alright?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She scoffed. “Do what? Hurt her more than by her account you already have?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Vicky, stop.” She raised an eyebrow at the use of a different nickname. “Stop. You asked if I could help, and I’m saying no. Please,” he added, in fear of what might happen if he didn’t punctuate the words with something at least a bit softer, “Please don’t.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Tori shrugged. She seemed put off, even a little disgusted. “Okay,” she said anyway. “Okay, I won’t. Sure.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Getting up from her chair, Tori disappeared up the stairs.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius couldn’t help but feel the encounter had been left unfinished. Something wasn’t right.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, standing before two of the people he most cared about, he knew something most definitely hadn’t been.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’d done it. She’d said she wouldn’t and then she did it anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She lied to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hurt his friends.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His, well…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wait. Teddy and Al thought he was behind this. They truly believed that he had willingly done this to Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thought made him sick.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You think I did this?” The words came out a lot quieter than Scorpius wanted them to. He watched for Teddy’s and Al’s reaction, hoping that they knew him well enough or at least used to know him well enough to be able to tell that he was being truthful. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’d believe him...right?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then again, he’d believed Vicky when she told him she would back off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He couldn’t believe this. She’d really had the audacity to behind his back after he told her not too, just to hurt someone she barely knew. Had barely even heard about. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then again, a little part of him guessed he knew this would happen. It was something he’d been ignoring this whole goddamn time. The whole time he’d been putting on this show for everyone, he’d been telling and telling and telling himself that it was okay; she wasn’t that bad and he could deal with it because that meant he was fine. It meant he was over everything that had happened last year: over the trauma, over the friendship, over Cas.  He was able to forget about it and at least pretend to be happy, and maybe...maybe, if he pretended for long enough, he’d forget he was pretending at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course the fuck you did!” Teddy screeched, “Why wouldn’t you?” he stumbled back a bit, tearing a hand through his hair. “God, why the hell were we so stupid?” He turned to Al, crazed as if looking for confirmation. “Why were we? How were we actually starting to think that he was coming around? That this son of a bitch could actually change? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Man</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” his voice broke on the last syllable, effectively shattering Scorpius’s heart in the process. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy looked from Scorpius to Al, then back to Scorpius. “We weren’t just wrong about that, though...that’s the worst part. We were wrong about you the whole goddamn time.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Not this.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You can’t do this to me. You can’t take away my very last chance at family. You can’t---</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Even though I deserve it.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I deserve it.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al,” was all he choked out in feeble response. Teddy looked slightly confused as if he expected Scorpius to bite back with a passion, spit venom into his former friend’s face, try to protect the last shreds of an ego Teddy still assumed that Scorpius had. “Al, please. You know me, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do I?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two words were as strong as a punch to the gut.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do I? Do I really know you, Scorpius, at this point?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al, I know I did some shit things, but you have to know--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean,” Al chuckled harshly, all but completely ignoring Scorpius’s protest. “Last year you were my best friend, you helped me through one of the hardest times in my life, and then you throw it all away for some poisonous Slytherin preppy. I have barely enough time to absorb it when you’re crying in my arms on the floor of our fucking dorm, and I think maybe, maybe there’s room for change. Maybe you can turn around. And just when I’m starting to miss you again, when I’m starting to believe in you, you whip around and pull </span>
  <em>
    <span>this shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Al sighed, turning away so he didn’t have to look at Scorpius anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Could he really blame him?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, no. I really don't think I do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence was deafening.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You heard him,” Teddy seethed. “We don’t know who the fuck you are anymore. And I don’t know about Al, but I’m pretty sure I’m not a big fan of Malfoy 2.0.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, please just let me explain what happened, I swear, I would </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span>--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Hurt </span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Hurt us? Somehow, I don’t believe you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You guys--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s a </span>
  <em>
    <span>bit </span>
  </em>
  <span>too little too late to save yourself from that one.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t fucking pretend like you care about us now. Don’t fucking pull that shit on us, Malfoy, you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You really think I would do this to Cas? All of this shit? I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s fucking crying, Scorpius!”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She’s…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who the </span>
  <em>
    <span>hell </span>
  </em>
  <span>else would she cry over beside you? You’re the only piece of shit she’s ever been able to trick herself into believing might actually care back!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You realize I wasn’t even </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking there</span>
  </em>
  <span>, right, mate? I was down here, alone, before you two come here and try to choke me out for something I didn’t even</span>
  <em>
    <span> fathom </span>
  </em>
  <span>doing--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can’t even pretend that you care about her feelings anymore, </span>
  <em>
    <span>mate.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Al mocked, “We all say you blow that chance the moment you called off your stupid truce last year, you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I deserve this.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No, I deserved this.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>But I don’t anymore.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>That’s not me.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Not anymore, not ever again. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And the fact that Cas was crying.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He wasn’t the cause of that. He wouldn’t be.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, he supposed that whether he did this or not, he already had been the cause.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Never, never never, never.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Never again.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Not over my dead body.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt the anger, the guilt, the resentment, the thousand needles of betrayal course through his blood, filling him up with electric energy and pain and hate.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And clarity.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When will you two get it into your thick skulls that</span>
  <em>
    <span> I didn’t fucking do this</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Scorpius roared above their jabs and verbal punches. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t do it!” He said again, breath hitching. Not because he didn’t think they’d heard him the first time…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because he needed them to know.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t do it.” He echoed, quieter, for the last time. “I would </span>
  <em>
    <span>never, ever </span>
  </em>
  <span>do anything like this to any of you. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Especially</span>
  </em>
  <span> Cas,” he added, half hating himself for shooting Teddy a pointed look. “Have I made shitty decisions this year? Hurt all of you in more ways than I could ever count? Dug myself into a hole of treason I’ll probably never be able to climb out of? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> yes. But this isn’t just wrong, n-no. No, it’s not just mean, or a product of cowardice. It’s petty. It’s mean as shit. It’s a lower blow than anyone should ever take at anyone, whether still friends or not--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A lower blow than he’d ever thought she’d take.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And I don’t care if you’re mad at me, hell, I got fucking used that, that’s not the problem. I just need you to know, and I need you to believe that I had no part in this. I would never do this to Cas. Especially after everything I’ve already done, I--” he cursed his voice for breaking. “I couldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>ever </span>
  </em>
  <span>bring myself to come up with this shit and actually carry it out. Because I’m fucking trying, alright? I’ve been trying ever since we found out what we had to do, ever since we knew we had to leave, hell, even before that.</span>
  <em>
    <span> Way </span>
  </em>
  <span>before that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He paused only a second to breathe, to watch for their facial expressions, to hope against hope that his words were ebbing their hate away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A-and, okay, I’m not even going to lie to you two, I’ve done enough of that for a lifetime, so...I did know something about this. And I don’t know how this went down, or what you know from Cas or Phelia, but I think you know as well as I do who did this to her. I think you’ve known this whole time, the minute you saw that fucking note in her handwriting, and the pictures…” he ran a hand through his hair, the wheels in his head churning memories. “Those goddamn pictures. You know what that was? It was a fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>bet.</span>
  </em>
  <span> I lost a fucking bet with one of my “friends”...” he made the air quotes for added effect. “I lost a bet against her and one of my classmates and all she wanted to do was take these fucking pictures. Have a snowball fight. “Act like a couple for once”, as she would say. Every. Single. Damn. One. I don’t think…” he trailed off, letting his thoughts consume him for once. “I don’t think I’ve ever actually smiled that much around anyone but you guys.” he said quietly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shaking his head, he forced himself to look back up, making eye contact with both of them in turn. “I should’ve known.” he conceded. “I should’ve known back then when she asked that it was all a part of her </span>
  <em>
    <span>goddamn plan</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she’d had this in mind from the start, I--”</span>
</p><p><span>How long had she been planning this?</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Then...a couple of days ago...she came to me with the pictures. Told me what she was going to do with them. Asked for </span><em><span>my fucking help</span></em><span>, too.”</span></p><p>
  <span>Al looked on with confusion, egging him on. His eyes begged a silent </span>
  <em>
    <span>what next?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“And, the fucking kicker is that I told her </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I told her I didn’t want her to do it, that it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>wrong, </span>
  </em>
  <span>that Cas had done nothing wrong or anything to her to deserve that. I...I made sure she wouldn’t. I told her directly and she...she </span>
  <em>
    <span>still did it</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She went behind my back and she did it anyway when she knew the thought of it made me want to puke, or cry, or do something drastic, I…I </span>
  <em>
    <span>really trusted her</span>
  </em>
  <span>, huh? You guys aren’t the stupid ones,” he assured, smiling sadly. “I’m the dumbass who trusted the snake and got bit in the end anyway.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence was all it took for him to realize that he hadn’t even said her name. “So--Vicky did this to her. I told her not to and she did it. She played me. Which,” he laughed humorlessly, “I guess I should’ve expected. I definitely deserved it. And I’m sorry.” he added. “I know that’s not enough, and it never will be, and that’s definitely something I’ll never stop saying, but for right now, I’m so sorry. I should’ve never let this get out of hand, and it did, and it screwed things up even more royally and…” he looked both of them in the eye, hoping they could understand that he meant it. “I’m not asking for you to welcome me back with open arms, hell no, even if you did I wouldn’t deserve it, but...all I want is for you to please trust me with some time. I’m going to prove to you that I regret all of this, I’m gonna make sure I make this right for everyone, not just you two and...and--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before he could finish grasping for words, Al closed the gap between them and pulled Scorpius into a quick, tight hug. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to choke down a sob. It meant more than he’d ever be able to tell all.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Thank you. I’m so sorry. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Time, huh?” Al asked in a familiar tone that Scorpius had so dearly missed. “I can work with time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As they broke apart, Scorpius couldn’t help but look to Teddy. The tension and silence between them was thick enough to cut with a knife, but Scorpius hoped their unspoken words could make their way through the fog.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy looked like he was trying to remember how to feel any other emotion besides mad. His face was contorted in leftover anger and confusion, as well as something that Scorpius was praying was forgiveness.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius was honestly half expecting another screaming match to ensue, but instead, he received a smile. “Jeez, Malfoy, I can’t believe you ditched all of </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span>--” he gestured up and down to himself, grinning mischievously, “for Dicky this year. You missed so much, dude.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As thankful as Scorpius was, as much as he’d missed it all too, he couldn’t help but catch the malice in the nickname of his…</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What even was she anymore?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He exhaled all of the pent up worry and nervousness, meeting both their eyes again. “Guys, I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>so sorry.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy grinned lopsidedly. “Scorpius, you’ve already said a hell of a lot today, leave it for--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.” he enforced. “No, I want to say this. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>need</span>
  </em>
  <span> to, because...because I’ve had so many chances to say it and I haven’t, so....so just hear me out, alright?” he closed his eyes briefly, hoping against hope he could find the words. Opening them slowly again, he lowered his head and stared thoughtfully at the both of them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so incredibly sorry. I know those are just words and that’s why I need time, I...I can’t just tell you, I need you to </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> and I need you to trust me. All those things I did...I thought they made sense at the time, I thought I knew what I was doing and I had </span>
  <em>
    <span>a plan,</span>
  </em>
  <span> I...I chickened out. I was a coward. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>a coward,” he conceded sheepishly. “I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>so fucking scared</span>
  </em>
  <span>. When Cas told me...that was all I wanted to hear, it’s all I had hoped for and she just barely said anything and I just...shut down. After...with Vicky, I...I thought maybe if I pretended I didn’t care anymore it would just…</span>
  <em>
    <span>happen,</span>
  </em>
  <span> y’know? I could actually stop caring. I mean, I had already ruined everything, right? It would be fine, and I’d just be able to let last year go. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I think a part of me wanted to let go, right? Like apart from everything with Cas I just...wanted to forget </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>, know it was over. But pretending was hard. “ he chuckled at his own simplicity. “It was </span>
  <em>
    <span>really fucking hard</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Seeing you guys, keeping up a pretense, putting up a mask, and coming up with someone to pretend to be hurt </span>
  <em>
    <span>so damn much</span>
  </em>
  <span>...especially when all this shit started up again, and I finally had a reason to be around you guys, without her, and I could just be...b-but it was still </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretending</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I haven’t been me for a long time...and all I wanted was to pretend like I didn’t make a mistake and screw everything up. I wouldn’t miss my friends if I didn’t have any friends to go back to. But obviously--” he threw his hands up in the air, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Obviously</span>
  </em>
  <span> it didn’t work. You know that.” He gave Al a meaningful look. “I missed you all too much. I missed </span>
  <em>
    <span>her </span>
  </em>
  <span>too much. I…” he trailed away, feeling his face begin to heat up with chagrin. “I started to slip up. Vicky started to notice. But I feld bound, all on top of that. I felt like I couldn’t leave, I was just...</span>
  <em>
    <span>trapped.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Part of me--I didn’t want to hurt her either. I had already done enough damage and here I was: leading her on too. My life was a big hoax at that point, and I was just going through the motions. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the Horcruxes came back, and we decided we were leaving, I...I knew I had to do </span>
  <em>
    <span>something.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Obviously, I wasn't in a million years going to let her come along, but I felt like I owed her something, just as much as I owed you guys something. I decided I had to start pulling away, but she caught me. She noticed, she’d confront me, she’d start pulling back in the other direction. With the pictures, with...with</span>
  <em>
    <span> this</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I don’t know how this had anything to do with keeping me close, but… for some reason it made sense with her fucked up reasoning. I need you guys to know…” he looked to the floor. Shuffled his feet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Prayed for understanding. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m done. With all of that. I’m done, I want to be </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span> again. Pretending fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>sucks</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I’m done with it. And...I’m never gonna stop apologizing. Even if you swear you’ve forgiven me, whether that be five, ten, or fifty years from now, I’ll never stop. Because I’m never going to forgive myself either. I…” he switched tactics. “I really like Cas. A lot. So </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking much</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and...I know I have a damn funny way of showing it, but...I’m determined to fix that too. I will fix it. That’s the very least she deserves.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He quieted down, let it sink in. Teddy came forward, as did Al, walking forward and stopping inches before him, tentative to continue.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry.” he choked out, finally allowing a tear to fall. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They hugged him. They pulled him in, the three of them in that hallway, alone, confused, sad, hurt, but happy. Together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whole.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius could feel Teddy’s chin on his forehead as the taller boy talked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good to have you back, Sunshine.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><span>Cas pressed her back against the wall outside the bathroom they were all supposed to meet at. Ophelia paced in front of her, </span><span><br/></span> <span>“Are they seriously late? How could </span><em><span>all</span></em><span> of them be late? Of course, they’re late, y’know we’re just trying to save the world, why would they be on time?” She continued pacing as Cas listened in amusement. “Ugh just wait, when they get here...</span><em><span>ugh</span></em><span> when I get my hands on Teddy…” She mimicked strangling the invisible figure. </span></p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, Phelia, I’m sure you’ll do </span>
  <em>
    <span>lots</span>
  </em>
  <span> of things when you get your hands on Teddy.” Cas smirked as Ophelia came over to swat at her head and mess up her hair. They both quieted when they heard whispers down the corridor, freezing and praying that it wasn’t Filch. They eliminated Filch as an option when they heard hushed laughter then, a split second later Teddy was clearly pushed into eyesight and stumbled towards them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nice of you to join us, Loudmouth.” Ophelia commented. Not more than five seconds later Al came into eyesight, a split second later Scorpius followed. Cas rolled her eyes, why were they together? More importantly, why were they </span>
  <em>
    <span>laughing</span>
  </em>
  <span>? It was almost like they were enjoying each other's company. Her stomach twisted violently as all three of her boys stood in front of them. Her best friend since birth, her cousin, and her...her...Scorpius? As much as she wanted the Scorpius from last year to magically appear, seeing him here with them, laughing and smiling, made her stomach burn with anger.  Yet she still wanted the laughter and the inside jokes and scarfs and soft smiles back, she wanted it </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She needed it all to just </span>
  <em>
    <span>come back</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And they had gone from all of that to here. Here, where Cas was upset at the fact that the three of them had shown up together because that meant they had forgotten everything that happened. Here, where they were about to abandon everything familiar to them and all she could worry about was whether or not she was ever going to be able to look at Scorpius’ all too beautiful face and </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> want to cry. Here, where apparently it was okay to pull heart-crushing pranks just when she thought things were going to be alright. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The prank. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Her</span>
  </em>
  <span> prank. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The prank that was thoughtfully planned out to cut Cas as deep as humanly possible. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She scoffed, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Congrats Vicky. You won, go ahead, have the stupid son of bitch. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>That’s not true</span>
  </em>
  <span>, a small voice said. Because after all this time some insane part of Cas still wanted to believe he was good, </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> that he was good. He wasn’t just pretending last year, this wasn’t him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas fished her consciousness out of the ocean of thoughts it was swimming in and asked one simple question. Did Al just forget the prank. Did Teddy forget that the boy he was standing next to so openly made her break so much she </span>
  <em>
    <span>cried</span>
  </em>
  <span>?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia glared, “Great now that you’re all here, can we</span>
  <em>
    <span> please</span>
  </em>
  <span> get going?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As you wish, m’lady.” Teddy grinned and brushed her lower back as he directed her towards the bathroom door. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>How romantic,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Cas mouthed. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shut up,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she got back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They all stood in the middle of the elegantly tiled bathroom as Cas took in her surroundings. She rarely used this bathroom, she had enough emotional turmoil on her own without dealing with Moaning Myrtle’s. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was an earsplitting wail. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Speaking of Moaning Myrtle</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Giinnnyyyyy!” The name drew out and dipped in pitch as the ghost came sweeping into view. “You haven’t changed a bit!!” The girl started to sniffle, “I’ll never age either! Cause I’m deeeaaaddd!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh no--that’s no--she’s not--” Ophelia started but was cut off by another shriek. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Harry Potter!!” She giggled, “Devilishly handsome,</span>
  <em>
    <span> as usual</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” She batted her eyelashes behind the thick-rimmed glasses she wore, her pigtails swinging as she swooped in to get another look at her “Harry Potter,” or Al. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas had to stifle a laugh at how extremely uncomfortable he looked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Cas thought Myrtle’s reactions to her and Al were bad, it was nothing compared to Scorpius.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Drrraaccooo Maalllfooyyy!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She started to bawl, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You came back!!! You always promised you’d come back!” </span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>To Cas’ horror, Teddy stepped in front of the boy in question grinning his stupidly crooked grin, “Nope not Draco,” He pointed to Al, “not Harry,” and finally, Cas, “not Ginny, they’re their kids.” Teddy turned to Scorpius, “Besides lil old Sunshine here couldn’t be his daddio, see?” He ruffled Scorpius perfectly placed hair, “No extensive amounts of hair gel to be found here.”  Scorpius smiled a real smile, it had been so long since she had seen it. Her heart throbbed at the thought that she used to be able to put it there, much to her dismay her stomach fluttered at how beautiful he was when he was genuinely smiling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas whipped her head towards Ophelia, looking for an explanation for the sickening display of affection Teddy had just performed. She found an equally disgusted look on her best friend’s face, turning to find Al’s eyes, Cas tried to block out the flood of thoughts that were rushing to the front of her mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The boy in question was conveniently studying the floor very intently, effectively avoiding Cas’ death glare. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>How dare he? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A dark cloud settled over Cas’s mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was always easier to get mad. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was so much easier to want to yell at Al than to feel the pain the thought of their friendship induced. It was so much easier to want to punch Vicky in her sickeningly perfect face than to stop long enough to wonder if what she had said was true. So much easier to want to kick Scorpius in the gut than to look into his cold eyes and tell him how much he had hurt her. How broken she had felt, how broken she </span>
  <em>
    <span>still</span>
  </em>
  <span> felt. So much easier to be angry at the fact that they had made her look like a blubbering fool in front of her friends to slow down and feel the crushing pain in her chest when she looked his way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, Scorpius chose Al and Teddy, of course, he weaseled his way back into their good graces...</span>
  <em>
    <span>of course,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he didn’t care enough to try to get back into Cas’. Scorpius chose Al and Teddy, he chose Dicky, he seemed to choose everyone </span>
  <em>
    <span>but</span>
  </em>
  <span> Cas, last year was different. Last year was so much more simple, all she wanted was to go back to when Scorpius gave her butterflies, not insecurities, to where seemingly meaningless scarfs were exchanged instead of cruel words and glances. Yet here he was, laughing and smiling that unfair, </span>
  <em>
    <span>beautiful,</span>
  </em>
  <span> smile like he hadn’t just put all of them through hell. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Moaning Myrtle had gone wailing into a toilet at the realization that Scorpius was not Draco Malfoy and she </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> get to “rekindle” her “fiery romance with Harry Potter.” After looking at each other with immense confusion Al started speaking equally terrifying and breathtaking parseltongue towards the walls around them. His words slurred together and Cas tried her best to ignore the shiver that ran down her spine as the familiar language brought back </span>
  <em>
    <span>uncomfortable</span>
  </em>
  <span> memories. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my god, Al.” Cas whispered, she hated how much her voice shook with the worry the memories had brought with them. “I didn’t realize your dad talked in his sleep </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> much.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He smiled sadly and nodded, continuing on. Something, somewhere in the bathroom, shifted. Despite everyone’s best efforts, they all jumped, Cas’ heart nearly stopped. A wall in front of them wriggled and writhed, eliciting groans out of the whole group from the screeching sound it made as the stones pressed up against each other. Slowly, but surely, a hole opened in the corner of the bathroom. Cas could feel her heart in her ears as she approached the gaping hole in what used to be the wall of the bathroom, her stomach swerved as she realized the hole dropped straight down in a steep slope into the darkness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great job, Al” Teddy’s tone was light, “Now, how are we supposed to get down there? Cause there is no way in hell I’m throwing myself down there. No </span>
  <em>
    <span>way</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’ stomach fluttered but nonetheless, she smirked, “Aw, come on, Teddy, you’re not scared are you?” To her surprise everyone laughed, including Scorpius, she clenched her fists, who gave him the right to laugh at her jokes? After everything he’d done, he didn’t get to feel comfortable enough to laugh with them. After all the condescending comments, he didn’t get to think </span>
  <em>
    <span>she</span>
  </em>
  <span> was funny. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Some still sane part of Cas laughed at herself, she missed him desperately, yet here he was laughing and being more than civil with her best friends and all she wanted to do was pummel his stupidly attractive face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As a matter of fact, Mini Weasley, I am. You can throw yourself down that shoot, but I am not going to.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She raised her chin and shrugged, “Okay.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay?” Four collective voices questioned incredulously, Cas felt the adrenaline start to pump through her body, the adrenaline that made her drag her broken ass out onto the pitch every day to swoop through the sky. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have to get those fangs somehow. Am I wrong?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She moved towards the hole ignoring the protests and the hands that tried to hold her back. Taking a deep breath she swung her legs over the shoot, and before she gave herself a chance to think she plunged down the slope. It was like a deadly water slide, it was steep enough to make her stomach fly to her throat but sloped enough to shoot Cas out on her butt unharmed enough. Her knees were substantially scratched and they groaned when she boosted herself up, but other than the breath that had decided to leave her throat she was fine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She felt a cruel sense of triumph as she looked up the steep shoot, she may have been forced into tears by Dicky and Scorpius, she may have been sulking around like a puppy that had been kicked for the past two days, and she may have made a complete embarrassment out of herself in front of Ophelia, but at least she had the guts to plunge down a steep-ass shoot first, and survive. Take that </span>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You can’t keep doing this. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She knew it too. She knew she couldn’t keep covering her hurt with over-aggressive comments and passive jokes. She knew it would all catch up to her, just like it had when she saw those horrible pictures, just like it did when she read that note. It all came crashing down on her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wasn’t good enough. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nothing she would ever do could prove that fact wrong. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vicky knew it. She knew it. Scorpius knew it...he was just the only one cruel enough to say something about it. Which was really some sort of evil twist of fate, because...because Scorpius used to be one of the only people who made her feel like she </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> good enough. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas!” Ophelia’s voice, tight with worry,  echoed down towards her, pulling her out of her personal circle of hell. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Oh my God, do you think she’s dead?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Cas shook her head when she heard Teddy’s hushed whisper. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry to disappoint, Lupin! Not dead!” As she yelled her response to her cousin's ridiculousness, she took a moment to take in her surroundings. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was dark.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Incendio</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” The spell that flew from Cas’ wand took to the torches, lining the wall with an eerie light.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The temperature was at least ten degrees colder, and the spooky light the torches cast illuminated the empty grayness that surrounded Cas. Another shiver ran down her spine when her eyes settled on a carving in the wall, an old man’s head, an old man’s head with snakes pouring out of his mouth. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Charming</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She rubbed her arms with her hands in a feeble attempt to warm herself up, she seriously wished she had grabbed a hoodie, the damp smell had permanently settled into her nose, and--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her internal complaining was interrupted by a thud. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia had landed, followed by Teddy, Scorpius, and finally Al. They were a tangle of limbs and explicit language. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I told you, dumbasses, to </span>
  <em>
    <span>wait</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Ophelia groaned as she limped away from the pile of boy she had successfully untangled herself from. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We did.” Teddy insisted, he scratched the back of his neck and shuffled his feet under Ophelia’s glare. “For a few seconds…” He trailed off as Ophelia rolled her eyes and trained them on Cas. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Uh oh. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you insane?” Ophelia screeched. “You had no idea how steep that drop could’ve been! You had no idea what was going to be at the bottom! You. Had. No. Idea.” She punctuated each word with a tiny shove at Cas’ shoulders, before pulling her into a short hug. There were a lot of mixed messages. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah Cas,” Al said as he gripped Scorpius’ hand and dragged him up off the floor, the gesture made twenty questions (at least) rise to the front of Cas’ mind. Most of them being why Al chose to forgive Scorpius, after </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “That was pretty dangerous, even for you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas scoffed and shot her cousin the best glare she could muster, “Like you care.” She made her point clear by looking Scorpius’ way for a split second too long, before swiveling on her heel and grabbing Ophelia's arm. Dragging them forward, down the menacing corridor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn't bother to look back when she heard shuffling feet behind them that meant the boys had followed suit. “What the fuck is </span>
  <em>
    <span>happening</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia looked up at the ceiling as if that was going to provide the answer. “I have no clue, Cas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What happened to ‘killing him?’” She used air quotes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know! I </span>
  <em>
    <span>swear</span>
  </em>
  <span> that’s what Teddy said. I swear Cas, they were both </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> mad, I honestly hadn’t seen them both like that before.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas glanced back at the three of them walking side by side silently, “Yeah, they seem real mad, Phelia.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ugh, I don't know what happened, Cas!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then maybe you should ask your boy, Teddy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s not my </span>
  <em>
    <span>boy</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Still.”                       </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aw, come on, Phelia” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Noooo.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please?” Cas’ gave her puppy dog eyes then switched tactics when she was met with indifference. “Aren’t you the least bit curious as to what the fuck is going on? Like serious, since when are </span>
  <em>
    <span>they</span>
  </em>
  <span> the three fucking musketeers?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia quieted and rolled her eyes. Cas had her convinced. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So? Your boy?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine.” Ophelia tugged the ends of Cas’ hair lightly, “You’re a little shit, you know that right?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, how could I forget?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas and Ophelia dropped back, she watched in amusement as Ophelia dragged Teddy by the arm away from the group. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I assume we’re stopping?” Scorpius asked in response to Ophelia’s intervention. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al shrugged and Cas sauntered over to where Ophelia and Teddy were. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia rounded on her when she approached her and Teddy. “Why did you make </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span> ask him if you were just gonna come over here and eavesdrop?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m just </span>
  <em>
    <span>observing</span>
  </em>
  <span> his answers. Not eavesdropping.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever.” She rounded on Teddy. “What the hell is happening, Loudmouth?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do ya mean, my dear Phe-Phe?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh come off it, Lupin.” Ophelia crossed her arms, “What happened?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy glanced back at Al, “N-nothing?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aw come on, Teddy! Don’t say ‘nothing’ that’s so obvious.” Al complained. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“R-right,” Teddy turned back to the fuming brunette. “Not...nothing. S-something.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Something?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, something.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my God,” Cas groaned. “So what you’re saying is that you guys just forgot </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> that happened, the prank, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dicky</span>
  </em>
  <span>, th-the </span>
  <em>
    <span>prank</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and everything horrible in between. All of that doesn’t matter anymore, because </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> happened?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...Yes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia gripped the arm of Teddy’s jean jacket, he focused his hazel eyes on her. Cas’ heart skipped a beat, she had never seen Teddy like this before, he was so responsive to her. It was insane. “Phe,” He started, then he glanced back at Al and Scorpius, they both shook their heads. Scorpius mouthed something along the lines of “I want to be the one to do it,” which only confused Cas more. “I can’t tell you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia stepped back, and to Cas’ horror, she looked hurt. “You can’t trust me enough to tell me?” Her voice wavered, and Cas moved to stand closer to her, not fully understanding why Teddy was digging in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not what I said, Phe.” Teddy moved to brush her cheek, “I trust you with everything.” Ophelia turned pink at the neck, and Cas knew she was making a very conscious effort to </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> let Teddy off easy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then why can’t you tell me this?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not my information to share.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia stepped back and gave him a half-smile, “Yeah, okay. I get it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They plowed deeper into the dark tunnels, Cas lit the torches as they went, a stony silence had fallen over the group. Between the thousands of unsaid words between Teddy and Ophelia, the fact that Cas was on the verge of curling in on herself and kicking Scorpius in the balls, and the off mood Al had been in since they had met earlier that day, there was a lot of tension in the group. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As they went deeper a putrid smell started growing stronger and stronger. Like rotten eggs, but twenty times stronger and nose wrinkling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ew. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After ten minutes of complaining and nose plugging, they rounded a corner and met the infamous Basilisk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was the most disgusting thing Cas had ever seen, she tried to do the math in her head really quick. It had been around twenty-five years since Harry Potter killed the oversized snake on steroids, meaning there was only a little of the rotting flesh left on the corpse, either way, Cas’ nose was not pleased, and her throat contracted in a gag. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh Lord, let’s just take the fangs and get out of here.” Cas choked out, “Before I vomit,” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy nodded, “Agreed.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They split up and went to work. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please</span>
  </em>
  <span>, don’t prick yourself.” Ophelia reminded the group as Cas reached for a long, white fang. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gee, Phelia, who woulda guessed?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, y’know what? I wouldn’t put it past you, Miss. Throw-Myself-Down-A-Mystery-Hole” Cas shook her head and continued working. Carefully gripping the base of the tooth, internally thanking whatever higher power for the fact that it wasn’t slimy, Cas tugged until it came loose. She stumbled back and into a person. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Woah, Weasley,” His voice made Cas’ shoulders tense immediately, especially at the fact that it wasn’t filled with malice. “I know we haven’t been on the best of terms but can we at </span>
  <em>
    <span>least</span>
  </em>
  <span> agree you won’t stab me with a Basilisk fang?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her whole being ached to fall into the familiar banter, she ached to shoot back with something quick-witted and prove that he couldn’t catch her off guard. But when she looked up at his face her heart broke all over again, all she could see were those pictures, that </span>
  <em>
    <span>note</span>
  </em>
  <span>, everything she would never be good enough to have. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas put her head down, allowing her </span>
  <em>
    <span>infuriatingly </span>
  </em>
  <span>choppy strands to cover her face, which had conveniently turned as bright red as her hair. She moved to put her fang into the satchel Ophelia had brought, wiping at her watering eyes aggressively. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After ten more minutes of yanking out the snake’s teeth, they started to head back through the cold corridors. Cas shivered in her light t-shirt and Ophelia was shaking like a leaf under the little protection her school shirt gave her, apparently, Cas wasn’t the only one who noticed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Take it, Phe.” Teddy was draping his jean jacket over Ophelia’s shoulders. “Seriously, I have my sweatshirt I don’t even need it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t like it when you’re nice.” She said looking up at him with blue eyes full of affection as she slipped into the large jacket, “It’s unsettling.” Cas knew otherwise, Cas knew that Ophelia’s heart was probably in her throat and that her stomach was alive with butterflies, that her mind was full of endless theories as to what the gesture meant. She knew that because she had felt the exact same way when Scorpius had given her that </span>
  <em>
    <span>stupid</span>
  </em>
  <span> scarf. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A stupid scarf that she wished she had right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stupid scarf</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another shiver. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, guys?” Al’s voice pitched up with worry, “One problem.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Cas and Ophelia’s voices echoed around the empty space. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How are we gonna get out?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shit. That could be slightly problematic. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were silent for a few moments before Teddy spoke up, “I might have an idea!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Does it involve grappling, scaling, or physically climbing our way up the shoot in any way shape, or form?” Ophelia questioned quickly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, so I don’t have an idea.” </span>
</p><p><span>Cas racked her brain for a solution, searching the corners of her mind for a way out. They were wizards, this shouldn’t be a problem. They had magic, they had their own money system, their own spor--</span><span><br/></span> <span>Sport. </span></p><p>
  <em>
    <span>We have our own sport!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Excuse me?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas looked up in confusion, she must have actually thought out loud. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have our own sport.” She was met with looks of confusion, “We have our brooms, Phelia and I can just summon them and fly your asses out of here!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia thought it over, “That's…actually not a horrible idea.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well jeez, don’t sound so surprised.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia opened her mouth to reply but was cut off by Al, “Oh come on guys let’s get out of here. Please.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas shrugged, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Accio firebolt!”</span>
  </em>
  <span> She put as much power into the spell as possible, knowing it was locked in the broom closet. Ophelia mimicked her actions. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They waited in anticipation until Cas heard a soft whizzing a few painful moments later Cas saw two brooms flying full speed at them. Cas stumbled backward as she grabbed the smooth wood. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that worked surprisingly well,” Ophelia commented as she brandished her broom triumphantly. “Alright we’ll have to make an extra trip to get the fifth person, but let’s get going, this place gives me the creeps.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas subtly-not-so-subtly watched Scorpius’ lean frame approach Ophelia cautiously. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” He started awkwardly, Cas immediately saw Ophelia puff up, “So I was wondering if, like, I could catch a ride with you?” His voice pitched up at the end awkwardly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yo, Sunshine!” Teddy called as he jogged up behind Ophelia, “I got dibs on Phe-Phe!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius froze and Cas’ heart sped up. Great. Just fucking great. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>You can do this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s not that big of a deal. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just get him out of here and then you can go back to staying thirty feet away from him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s fine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stumbled over to her, she had never seen his step so uncertain before, it was very satisfying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C-Can I ride with you then?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do I have a choice?” She asked as she swung her leg over her broom, Cas made sure to let as much ice as possible seep into her voice, praying that how fast her heart was beating was covered by the malice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius was settling in behind her, Cas focused on Ophelia and Teddy in order to </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> pass out at the closeness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy had wrapped his arms all the way around Ophelia’s waist, resting his chin in the crook of her shoulder, “Is now a bad time to mention that I’m afraid of heights?” He whispered it just loud enough for Cas to hear. She knew it was meant for Ophelia’s ears only. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia smirked and reached back to ruffle his bright hair, Cas’ heart swelled at the sight of her blush, “Don't worry, Loudmouth, I got you.” She said it privately and Cas felt intrusive in such a sweet moment, a sweet moment that felt insanely foreign to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia looked back at Cas, “You ready? I’ll lead.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas nodded, Teddy shook his head, “Sunshine is definitely not ready, he’s not even holding on to Cas. Although, it would be <em>hilarious</em> to see him fall off the end of the broom.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Go to hell Teddy </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking</span>
  </em>
  <span> Lupin. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Please don’t do this to me. Don’t give me this chance, don’t. I was doing so good being mad. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He was doing it</span>
  <em>
    <span>.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He tentatively put his arms around her waist, at least he wasn’t holding her. Cas thought that if he held her she might actually die. His arms circled her loosely and Cas was trying to ignore the contact points where their bodies touched, knowing full well that Scorpius didn’t care enough to even think twice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia pushed off, Teddy clinging on tight enough to knock the breath out of the brunette, Cas took a deep breath and followed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a moment she felt the euphoric feeling she always got when she was in the air, then she heard Scorpius mutter a scratchy “shit” in her ear, and her stomach fell right back to the floor of the chamber. She swerved, caught so off guard by the sound of his voice, scared, in her ear. He squeezed around her stomach, burying his head in her hair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit, shit, shit.” He chanted as he squeezed her tighter. Cas’s body responded accordingly as her mind spiraled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Don’t feel. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Don’t feel. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t feel.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Except she did. She felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> of it. She felt his arms wrapped around her, she felt his breath in her ear, she felt the way her whole being came alive, like he was the only thing that mattered. She felt all of it. Including the cracking of her heart, over and over and </span>
  <em>
    <span>over</span>
  </em>
  <span> again, because he had left. He had chosen Dicky. He chose everything Cas hated and stood by it while she crumbled into the background. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was breaking while Scorpius was rebuilding. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was living in the good memories from last year while he was trying to erase them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wanted him back while he wanted to forget her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas couldn't let herself forget. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t let herself feel. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not when it came to Scorpius Malfoy.  </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius slumped into his now usual spot at the Slytherin table, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and waiting absentmindedly for the warm breakfast food to appear on his plate. It took true effort for him to focus on that, or anything at all, seeing as the day before had been so...eventful. He didn’t even try to block the flood of thoughts and memories as they entered his mind. Thoughts of corpses, fangs, uncomfortably long falls, and, as per usual, Cas. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>At this point, he couldn’t even surprise himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once he admitted it, the weight of yesterday seemed to seep into his bones instead of being lifted from his shoulders as he might have hoped.  He couldn’t deny that their little adventure to the Chamber had been...a lot to say the least, whether he was thinking about her or not. Reflecting on it, Scorpius knew the very moment he arrived that it was going to be a long day. As good as it felt to show up with Al and Teddy, it didn’t take a genius to realize how that would’ve seemed to the girls. As good as it felt, Teddy’s jokes and Al’s defenses weren’t helping his case either. As good as it felt to be around them...her again, he knew it wasn’t where he needed to be. He had a lot of work to do, and the story was just beginning. Scorpius had effectively erased an entire chapter of his life, and he was starting again with a mostly blank page.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mostly, of course, being due to the fact that he still hadn’t found the guts or the words to apologize to the one person who deserved to hear it most. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had felt it in his chest the day before, the stabbing pain of guilt mixed with a longing for something he couldn’t have. Hitchhiking on Cas’s broom was definitely not on the agenda, and Scorpius knew it would only make him feel worse. Thus, why he hadn’t suggested it. Thus, why he’d been so reluctant to hold on or reply to Teddy’s jokes or be anything but the infuriatingly constant “him” that he’d been masquerading as lately.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But when he’d been flying back to the bathroom and back to reality, scared shitless and trying not to focus on how expressly he wanted to die, all he could focus on was her. </span>
</p><p><span>Remembering that this was a credible thought most of the time, Scorpius chose to move on. </span><span><br/></span> <span>But of course, moving on meant facing the flood of emotions that had come with being there, so close to her after what felt like centuries of being so far apart, and yet still...separate. Close enough to notice the faint smell of honey and brown sugar and the fact that her hair had a slight cinnamon scent to it, red stands woven as well with the faint smell of smoke unique only to the Gryffindor common room fire. Yet, still too far to say I'm sorry, I was a coward, I was wrong, it’s all been fake, you were right.</span></p><p>
  <span>You’ve always been right and I’ve always been blind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As if the universe was feeling extremely clever, Scorpius’s eyes immediately caught Cas’s figure as he glanced around the great hall. She was flanked by Ophelia and Al, so Scorpius guessed that Teddy was probably done trying to eat Ophelia’s face and already with the other Hufflepuffs. If they were doing that at this point. Honestly, he had no idea but definitely would not be surprised. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Anyway,</span>
  </em>
  <span> his brain chided him, </span>
  <em>
    <span>back to Cas. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He watched as she and her friends made their way down to the Gryffindor. Al pulled Ophelia ahead a bit, and Scorpius noticed he was moving to the right to avoid walking into the viewpoint of Jonah and Milo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Huh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They took their respective seats at the table, making space between them for Cas to join them a few seconds later.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>However, she didn’t make it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As she continued to move forward, another figure moving in the opposite direction swerved into Cas’s path and bumped her roughly with their shoulder. Cas stumbled back a bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh shit, the rational part of his mind whispered. There’s gonna be blood.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>On cue, Cas, whipped around. “Excuse me?” she spat loudly. Standing her ground, Cas and Scorpius waited in bated breath for the aggressor to turn around. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s when Scorpius noticed the blonde hair. The Slytherin crewneck. The token purple-dyed tips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His stomach dropped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even worse, the rational part of his brain groaned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This is gonna be good, a small voice said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vicky slowly pivoted on the spot. Messing over-confidently with her hair for a second, she raised an eyebrow. Scorpius could literally hear her scoff from two tables down. She giggled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sickening.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, no, sweetie, excuse </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Vicky’s voice dripped like poison honey. “I wasn’t aware that single people had a harder time paying attention to where they were going.” She shrugged. “Maybe, ‘cuz they're all sad.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took a step toward Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And lonely.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another step.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And idiotic.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And </span>
  <em>
    <span>pathetic</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde took one more step, practically inches away from Cas. Silence fell over the two of them, but Vicky held eye contact, wordlessly daring Cas to say something. The redhead straightened up, looking directly into Vicky’s eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Get her, the quiet voice in Scorpius’s head egged on, Give her what she deserves.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then, as quickly as she’d risen, Cas backed down. Almost curling into herself, she let her eyes fall to the floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re right.” was all she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius waited. He watched, barely breathing, choking on the quiet, drowning in the tension her words had created. He waited for the comeback, the hex, even the punch.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it never came.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alarms blared in his mind, sending all the voices in his head into a unanimous panic.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><em>Come on Cas</em>, he screamed without making a sound, <em>Come on, don’t let her win</em>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it was already over. Cas had taken her seat at the Gryffindor table, and Vicky was walking again, making her way to her inevitable seat beside him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His mock-friend, Rowan Zabini, nudged him with his elbow. “Whatcha starin’ at, mate?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>While Rowan was usually a welcome buffer and one of the only Slytherins he would tolerate, save for Al, Scorpius wouldn’t let himself engage today.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t going to let any of this go on. Not today. Not any day after, not anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius stood before he could stop himself. “Give me a minute.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Making his way to intercept Vicky’s track, Scorpius plastered a small smile on his face and hurried to match his step with hers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning, boo!” Vicky chirped as if nothing had happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As if she wasn’t currently breaking down the person he cared about most in this godforsaken school. As if she wasn’t erasing every attempt he made in trying to fix his life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was </span>
  <em>
    <span>done.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The words made him shake, begin to sweat, want to take the easy way out, and fall back into this uncomfortably fake but familiar rut and allow himself to be the person everyone hated if it meant not having to face this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he had lost far too much and explained too little.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I talk to you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She giggled again. That same, sing-song giggle that made Scorpius want to puke all over her infuriatingly symmetrical face. “Aren’t we talking right now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t bother to hide his eye roll. “I mean, alone? Away from here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her face scrunched up into a mixture of confusion and anticipation. “...Sure.” Not waiting for any more incentive, Scorpius led her quickly out of the hall, through a long, winding corridor, and finally to a hidden alcove that was somewhere near the Charms classroom. He could hear Vicky’s protests due to how fast they were going as if from afar, but Scorpius didn’t care.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had made himself wait much too long to do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Truth be told, he was afraid that if he wasted even a second, he would just back out and play it off. Land himself in another makeout session with the girl he was supposed to be in love with and forget how to use his lungs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Deathly, deathly afraid.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So, as soon as they reached the alcove, Scorpius pulled her inside. The alcove was...cozy enough to be secluded, but big enough to allow Scorpius to step out of Vicky’s reach as she turned to him quizzically. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are we doing here, boo?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius tried to swallow, maybe gain some courage through the air he breathed, but nothing. His throat was still dry, his palms sweaty, his mind a dumpster of chaos. He looked from the ground to her, the ground to her, trying but continuously failing to hold eye contact. “What is it?” she echoed again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m done.” was all he could manage without his voice breaking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This, seemingly, didn’t look to be cluing Vicky in at all. Then, it was if a lightbulb went off behind her eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh...oh! This is about what just happened in the Great Hall, isn’t it? Well, I’m glad we’re finally on the same page about avoiding carrot top and her merry bunch at all costs-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” It came out a lot louder than he’d expected.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He rose up, forcing his back to straighten and his gaze to match hers. Pulling in a deep breath, Scorpius looked her solemnly in the eyes. “I mean, I’m done with this.” he gestured between them for further clarity.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The lightbulb went off again, though the look in her eyes was less composed, more crazed, more...erratic.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe the light bulb had shattered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wh-what?” she breathed out, still managing to put a surprising amount of anger into her fairly quiet tone. “That’s what this is about?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” he answered numbly. “Yeah, I’m done with this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re breaking up with me?” her tone was less sad and more so one of complete surprise as if Vicky couldn’t believe that someone would have the audacity to break up with her. That scared Scorpius even more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it also lit a match inside him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This. This was exactly why he’d dated her in the first place...and if, he was honest, why he was breaking up with her now. She was completely and utterly self-centered, the sun that planets rotate around in her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A perfect mask and a perfect storm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d really screwed himself over with this one. She wasn’t going to let him do this without fighting back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s what I said, yeah.” he continued, keeping his voice a picture of nonchalance. “I just---I’m sorry, V-Tori, it’s just. I don’t like who I am around you, y’know? It’s nobody’s fault, really, it’s just--I feel like I need to make some changes and I just don’t wanna act like the person I’m becoming with you anymore. I’m sorry,” a small pang of guilt forced him to tag on, “but it’s over.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stared at him, directly, her eye contact never wavering as she watched his every move. Scorpius felt like putting on a jacket, turning away, anything to stop her burning gaze from frying him alive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean, “who you are around me”? This is who you are, Scorpius. You’ve done that </span>
  <em>
    <span>all on your own.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” the blonde questioned, eyebrows arched in complete malevolence. But she didn’t sound disappointed or hurt. Just incredulous, angry, and defensive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As if she didn’t know.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Have I?” He matched her sky-high eyebrows, urging her on, daring her to remember. Take accountability. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Something other than put herself first.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“What did I ever do to you? To your reputation? I </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> hurt you, Scorpius. I’ve been the </span>
  <em>
    <span>picture</span>
  </em>
  <span> of a perfect--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, you never hurt me? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Really</span>
  </em>
  <span>? That’s what you're gonna pull right now?” The malice seeped into his voice, and Scorpius didn’t even bother to stop it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because it was what he really felt. And he’d be damned if he had to keep pretending. “Then I guess I just imagined all of the times you forced me to skip class just to hang out with you, or throw away my sketches because they’re “stupid”, or purposefully ignored me after I directly told you not to do that </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucked u</span>
  </em>
  <span>p shit to Cas--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, only one part of his response seems to have registered with Vicky. “Oh, so this is about Cas?” she laughed hysterically, reaching up to wipe away imaginary tears from her eyes. “It’s always about Cas with you, isn’t it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius swallowed any want for acceptance he had left.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m done pretending.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know what? Yeah. You’re right. This is about Cas...actually, screw that, of course, it’s about Cas. It’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>always </span>
  </em>
  <span>been Cas.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Probably not the best wording, but he didn’t mean it any less.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is about you purposefully going out of your way to hurt her, after she did what? Nothing to you. Nothing to</span>
  <em>
    <span> anyone</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She didn’t deserve any of that. You don’t get to break someone down just because you feel like it. You’ve forced me to break away from my friends, my family, the only real one I’ve ever had just because it makes you </span>
  <em>
    <span>look</span>
  </em>
  <span> better, or feel better. And you know what? Maybe you feel threatened. Maybe me being so close to her scares you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scares me?” she cackled again, almost stumbling back with the force of it. “How do you expect me to be scared of Cas? I broke her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>She’s </span>
  </em>
  <span>the one who should be scared of</span>
  <em>
    <span> me</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How can you honestly say that after all of this? How can you not feel sorry for what you did to her? To me? Why even ask for my fucking opinion if you were just going to go behind my back and pull the prank anyway?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because I wanted your help, boo--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t call me that!” Scorpius exhaled heavily, breathing in gasps as their volume rose. He could barely see, barely hear her, only think about what was coming next.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t want to let him do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But that wasn’t her choice to make. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Also, for the record, bullshit that you wanted my help, Victoria. You were perfectly capable of being a manipulative bitch on your own. You made that </span>
  <em>
    <span>quite</span>
  </em>
  <span> clear.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How can you say that?” she mocked in an especially high voice. “Are you actually kidding? I made you who you are! I gave you </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything </span>
  </em>
  <span>you have--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>And I don’t want that!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” he practically screamed. “What about that is so hard for you to understand? I don’t want to be that. Not now, not again, not ever. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>hate</span>
  </em>
  <span> who I am, Vicky. That’s it. Plain and simple. And I can’t be around you, because it only makes it worse.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That isn’t my fault!” she screeched, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You </span>
  </em>
  <span>chose this! You set this all up for yourself after you told me and everyone that you were done with that Weasley scum and all the rest of that lot! </span>
  <em>
    <span>You ditched them</span>
  </em>
  <span>, remember?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I do remember actually.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And it hurts like hell.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“And it was the worst decision I ever made, you know that? Well,” he pretended to ponder as she scoffed, “besides forcing myself to believe that it was a good idea to date </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vicky gasped, completely of her own accord, and Scorpius felt oddly satisfied in knowing he’d made a dent. “Oh, and just in case I haven’t made it perfectly clear: you didn’t break her.” he took a step forward and shifted his gaze to stare down at the girl he so despised. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You’re not that powerful.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took an equal step back, then one toward the door. “Fuck you, Scorpius Malfoy. If you’re gonna pull that, then you don’t deserve this anyway.” Roughly pushing past him, Vicky exited the alcove.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Almost as if his muscles made the conscious decision for him, Scorpius found himself following slightly, leaning around the entryway and calling after her. “By the way? You can keep the scarf.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he exhaled, Scorpius felt months of pain, the anxiety, the guilt, the crushing fear leave him as well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt lighter. More alive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>More like</span>
  <em>
    <span> him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Turning on his heel, Scorpius began walking in the other direction....</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And was surprised to see Teddy and Al. Their backs to the wall.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Son of a bitch</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Curving his path, he strolled up to meet them, eyebrows raised. “How much did you hear?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy whistled slowly. “...Not much.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All of it.” Al corrected sheepishly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh...yeah, maybe all of it,” The blue-haired boy conceded, “but good for you, man! You finally got rid of Dicky.” he leaned in close. “You have to call her that now too, y’know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius nodded good-naturedly. “Got it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al shuffled a bit. “Scorpius...those things you said, they--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t.” he held up a hand. “Thanks, though.” Al nodded. As Scorpius backed away, an urgent thought stopped him in his tracks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He imagined her face. The anger and hurt that was still there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guys?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Both Teddy and Al waited. “Don’t tell the girls, okay? Especially Cas. I need to tell her myself.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy nodded vigorously, and a small, genuine smile graced Al’s face. Teddy, by nature, threw up his finger guns, clicking his tongue at Scorpius.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You got it, Sunshine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He certainly hoped so. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span> Al’s hands were shaking. His stomach was shaking. His legs were shaking. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> was buzzing with the intense anxiety he felt as he stumbled down to the Quidditch Pitch. Jonah had called it “their spot” in the note he had left for Al telling him where to meet for lunch. Which made everything so much worse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His whole body was telling him not to go through with this, his body remembered everything, his heart and the way Jonah made it feel, his face and the way Jonah held it, his lips and the way Jonah had made it feel like they were the only thing that mattered. His whole being was screaming at him to </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> do this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then he reminded himself that he was doing this </span>
  <em>
    <span>for</span>
  </em>
  <span> Jonah, he was setting Jonah</span>
  <em>
    <span> free</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>had</span>
  </em>
  <span> to do this. For the both of them. Jonah couldn’t be left at school wondering if Al was okay, waiting for him to get back, and Al couldn’t have something to come back to. Because would if--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He couldn’t think like that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span> He was breaking up with Jonah, end of the story. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then he saw him. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His blue eyes brightened at the sight of Al and his freckled face split into a warm grin, he boosted himself off of the blanket he was sprawled out on and jogged towards Al. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello, sweetheart,” Jonah muttered before pulling Al into a slow kiss. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He forced himself to not kiss back, he immediately felt Jonah halt against him, as if all the cogs that had been slowly turning, moving his lips forward, bring his arms around Al’s waist just screeched to a stop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah pulled back, keeping Al’s elbows propped in his callused hands, “What happened?” Of course, he thought something drastic had happened, because that would be the only reason Al </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>kiss his boyfriend back. He forced himself to look at Jonah’s face and the features he had quickly memorized, he really hoped he would never forget them. Because after this Jonah would never want to look at him again, he would break his heart. They were both so happy, and Al was taking all of that away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt tears start to build up in the back of his throat at the thought that Jonah would never look at him like this again. He would never get to be pressed up against his lean body as Jonah asked him about his day again. He would never get to see those blue eyes crinkle at the edges when Al told a stupid joke again. He would never feel Jonah’s hands cup his face again. Because after this, after Al took all of it away, there was no way anyone could come back from that, not even </span>
  <em>
    <span>his</span>
  </em>
  <span> Jonah. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Al?” His voice was tight with worry, “Al are you okay? What happened?” Al looked at the ground, the words wouldn’t come. He couldn’t look at the boy he </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved</span>
  </em>
  <span> and tell him he wanted to be away from him. He couldn't take away the only good thing in his life willingly. The words were stuck in his throat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tears broke from their confinements and flowed freely down his face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my god, Al. What’s wrong, please--” Al dropped his head in shame, he didn’t even have the guts to go through with it, he didn’t even fight as Jonah pulled him into his chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m breaking up with you.” Al choked it out. It was out, out in the air, floating between them as Jonah pulled away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-you’re what?” With the last bit of resolve in Al’s pathetic being, he brought himself to look at Jonah. He didn’t find anger, no malice or sadness, just confusion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Confusion. What was there not to get? </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A fucking lot. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-I’m breakin--” His</span>
  <em>
    <span> pathetic </span>
  </em>
  <span>excuse for an answer was cut off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Why?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C-come on Jonah,” Al sobbed, “You knew this was gonna happen, w-we’re leaving.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah dragged his hands through his hair, and cursed under his breath, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>So?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jonah</span>
  </em>
  <span>, we’re going after Horcruxes, I don’t want to leave you with a what-if.” Al hiccupped, reigning in his emotions as best he could. His stomach was still alive with guilt and worry and everything bad in between, but at least the tears had slowed after the initial shock of what he was doing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-I’ll wait, I can wait for you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>No,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Al raced his hands through his hair, “I’m trying to do this </span>
  <em>
    <span>for</span>
  </em>
  <span> you. I’m letting you go. Jonah, this is it. We’re done.” Al tried to put as much finality in his voice as possible, but all it did was betray him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah stepped forward into Al’s space, his eyes expressed more hurt and confusion than he would ever admit, but Al saw it. He felt his heart break. “Fine.” Jonah whispered, “Can I just...kiss you one last time then?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al laughed breathlessly, trying to ignore how ominous the undertones of what this kiss meant. Then Jonah’s lips were on his, his hand coming up to cradle the back of Al’s head and the world was gone. They weren’t on an empty Quidditch pitch, they weren’t breaking up, it was just Al and Jonah, Jonah and Al. He kissed Al slow and hard, enclosing him tightly in his arms, Al let himself completely melt into the kiss, breathing in Jonah’s scent for the last time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The last time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tears were back as flashes of them played behind his eyes. All of their kisses came rushing back to him, he remembered the broom cupboard, where they both had to hide who they were and how they felt. He remembered snowy kisses in Hogsmeade with cold noses and warm lips, soft kisses hello, and hot kisses that didn’t want to say goodbye. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Albus Severus Potter cracked, one minute he was kissing Jonah the next he was hanging his head, with his arms wrapped </span>
  <em>
    <span>pathetically</span>
  </em>
  <span> around Jonah’s neck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please,</span>
  </em>
  <span> don’t do this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al sobbed, “I have to.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah quieted and Al prepared himself for the boot, he was ready for Jonah to throw his arms off of him and leave forever, instead, he asked a question. “Do you want to?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another sob, “Obviously not, Jonah. You’re the best </span>
  <em>
    <span>damn</span>
  </em>
  <span> thing that’s ever happened to me.” His tears were hot against his cheeks, a physical reminder of all the pain he was putting them both through. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> do this.” I </span>
  <em>
    <span>have</span>
  </em>
  <span> to. “You </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>have to do this. I’m okay waiting.” Jonah reached up to finger a lonely curl of Al’s black hair, instinctively, Al leaned into his touch, “You’re wort--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <span>No,” Al couldn't let this happen, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>No </span>
  </em>
  <span>I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>not. I-I’m not." </span>
  </em>
  <span>He let the sobs rack his body, beat up his heart, he deserved it. </span>
  <span>We’re done, you’re free, th-this is </span>
  <em>
    <span>over.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>He raised his chin and set his jaw in a last attempt to keep his one shred of dignity. Ignoring the way his head was pounding, almost as if his thoughts were fisting the inside of his head, telling him not to do this. He tried to ignore the fact that every ounce of his being wanted to pull him close and say “nevermind.” </span>
</p><p><span>“Al,” Jonah was pleading now, “</span><em><span>Please.</span></em> <em><span>Don’t</span></em><span>.” </span></p><p>
  <span>He tried to block the desperate tone of Jonah’s voice out, Al was not above plugging his ears. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m doing this for you.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He boosted himself up on the balls of his feet and pressed his lips to Jonah’s for the last time, he brought his hand to cup his freckled face, looking straight into his beautiful blue eyes, which, to Al’s horror, were brimming with tears. “Thank you for </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I care about you more than you could </span>
  <em>
    <span>ever</span>
  </em>
  <span> know.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re worth waiting for,” Jonah said as Al slowly backed away, “This isn’t the end of our story, Albus!” Al spared Jonah one last lingering look before turning away and letting the sobs rack his body freely, somehow he made his way to the drooping willow tree by the lake, curling his knees into his chest, he let himself cry. Cry about Cas. Cry about Scorpius, and Teddy, and Ophelia. Cry about the fact that they were leaving the only place Al felt safe. He cried about Jonah and the look in his eyes when Al had turned away. He cried because he knew he was broken, he knew he had just let go of the one good thing he had going for him, he cried because he had felt so whole in Jonah’s arm. Like that was where he belonged, he cried because he had just made all of that disappear and it was all his fault. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>His fault. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He cried until he felt like he was physically out of water. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This isn’t the end of our story</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>God, Al hoped so. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Teddy couldn’t stop moving. His foot tapped against the stone floor, his hands fidgeted at the sleeves of the jean jacket that was not stopping the chills that ran down his spine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What had he got himself into? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were going to leave, they were </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> leaving. Leaving everything he knew behind in order to track down murderous Horcruxes, even with Ophelia’s loose plan it still felt like a wild goose chase to Teddy. Ophelia had sounded fairly confident when she told them that they were all probably heading to the graveyard where the Dark Lord had been brought back once before. Meaning that the Horcruxes were probably traveling South, which is why the five of them were boarding a train at midnight tonight heading South. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy yawned, it was eleven something at night and he wished that he hadn’t gotten there first. He wished he wasn’t alone right now, he needed something to ground him, to make the terrifyingly sick feeling in his stomach to go away. He just needed to feel like he wasn’t making a terrible, </span>
  <em>
    <span>unstoppable</span>
  </em>
  <span> mistake. Because there was no going back after this. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No</span>
  </em>
  <span> redos. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If something went wrong there was no one to save them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone</span>
  </em>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything’s going to be fine. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fine</span>
  </em>
  <span>. The pounding in his chest and the way his head felt like it was going to float off of his shoulders said otherwise. He was risking everything good to do something equally good, if he failed at either, he would lose everything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then the one thing he was most worried about losing rounded the corner. Teddy’s whole being swerved, his body came to life and his mind was drowning in her appearance. Her soft-looking hair encompassed her shoulders which were clad with a simple long sleeve t-shirt, he loved how adorable casual she looked. In one arm she held a duffle bag with the bottomless charm on it and her personal bag with the same charm, probably with her clothes and whatnot. Suddenly the bag Teddy had slung on his shoulder felt uncomfortably heavy, even though he knew that wasn’t possible, it was like the reminder of everything they were about to leave behind was suddenly put inside that bag and the strap that was digging into his shoulder was the constant fear he knew he would have to deal with. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey Loudmouth,” Her voice had taken a quiet, kind tone with a slight tightness of worry, Teddy looked up. Snapping himself out of his spiral and focusing on her face as she stepped closer, her eyes somehow still shined in the dim light behind the cutest glasses known to mankind, her mouth was turned down in a slight frown, and Teddy tried to bury the incessant want to kiss her. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe start with remembering how to speak, Lupin. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi,” His voice betrayed him, that son of a bitch, and came out hoarse and thick with worry. It almost, </span>
  <em>
    <span>almost</span>
  </em>
  <span>, accurately portrayed the paralyzing fear he felt in his bones. He cleared his throat desperately once he saw Ophelia’s face shift from a slight frown to a full-blown mask of poorly hidden worry. “Good evening to you, m’lady.” He tried for a lighter, flirtatious tone this time, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>even</span>
  </em>
  <span> added a crooked grin and a lift of an eyebrow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looked unconvinced. “Teddy,” Great, she used the full name. Oh god, her face. Oh god, Ophelia. “Are you okay? Really?” She took a couple of steps forward, still a comfortable distance away from him. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>tried to ignore the bile of anxiety and tears that he felt rising in the back of his throat. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No. No I’m not. I don’t want to go, I want to stay and be selfish and have a normal year and study for my N.E.W.T.S with you and piss you off up until the moment I prove everyone wrong and pass. And you’ll look at me the way you always look at me, proud, because you know that I was only proving you right, because you believed in me the whole goddamned time. Like normal students. Normal students who didn’t have to leave all of that behind to save the world. Normal students who weren’t brave enough to risk their lives for the whole world. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But of course he didn’t say any of that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh y-yeah,” Teddy nodded enthusiastically, or he sure as hell tried. “I’ve never been better, actually.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Y-yeah</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” He emphasized, but really it just sounded strangled, “Y’know just ready to leave the school and any chance at having a future because there’s a very real chance that I won’t get back in time to take my N.E.W.T.S.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia took another couple of steps forward, now at the edge of Teddy’s personal bubble of space. “Loudmouth, you know I’m never gonna let that happen.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, yeah, of course, I-I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> that. It’s just, great, it’s all </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> great cause for the first time in a </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> long time...for the first time, I feel like I belong and don’t have to pretend--well” He glanced up at the girl in front of him for a split second before rambling on. He couldn’t seem to stop himself and his internal voice of reason just wished for the sweet relief of death at this point in their embarrassment. “A-and I'm just trying </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> to focus on the fact that I feel like I’m giving that all up by trying to protect it. But I’m f-fine,” He felt his voice crack in his throat but for some terrifying reason kept going, “I’m ready. We’re gonna, we’re gonna </span>
  <em>
    <span>crush</span>
  </em>
  <span> it, cause y’know that’s what w--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy’s words dropped off as soon as Ophelia’s arms first made contact with his shoulder, her bags dropped to the floor so she could fully wrap her arms around his neck. His breathing hitched as she nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck, quickly he shifted his arms to close around her lower back, knowing he needed to hold her. He had wanted something to ground him, something to let him know everything was going to be okay, and here Ophelia Lovegood was, being all of that and more. Holding him as much as he was holding her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was such a terrifying feeling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Knowing he cared this much about one person. Knowing this person cared enough to actually ask about him, make sure he was hanging on, and would pull him up if he wasn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m scared too.” It was so quiet Teddy almost missed it, but he didn’t. Ophelia Lovegood, the strongest most independent person he knew, just admitted to being scared. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He pressed her closer to his chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll get through this together.” He chuckled softly into the top of her head, “I got you, Phe.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Two voices cleared their throats, “Are we interrupting something?” Teddy jumped back, Ophelia hastily picked up her bags, and Cas was awkwardly glaring at an equally awkward Scorpius. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So those were the two voices, Teddy scratched the back of his head, desperately thinking of something funny he could say to break the thick tension. He came up with nothing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right, so,” Ophelia brushed herself off and squared her shoulders, trying, and failing, in Teddy’s professional opinion, to regain her resolve “off we go then.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They did their best to keep the shuffling of their feet to a minimum, knowing it would be impossible to sneak out if Filch caught them tonight and their train would leave without a second thought. Eventually, they rounded what felt like the thousandth corner to Teddy, arriving at their final destination. This would be the last room of Hogwarts he would be in before their adventure or sorts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great, it’s a blank wall.” Cas sighed and ran her hands through her hair, “How do we get into the Room of Requirement, no, how do we get into </span>
  <em>
    <span>Harry Potter’s, </span>
  </em>
  <span>or the Dumbledore’s Army’s,” She sighed in exasperation of herself, “or </span>
  <em>
    <span>whatever,</span>
  </em>
  <span>  Room of Requirement, cause that’s where the passage is gonna be?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh…” Ophelia bit her lip as she thought. Teddy really wanted a turn--</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>STOP. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think we just think about it? Like about what we need, but make it specific to Dumbledore’s Army cause, Cas is right, that’s where the passage is gonna be.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So we just make concise, direct thoughts about something.” Scorpius repeated more to himself than the rest of the group, “Shouldn’t be too hard.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded absentmindedly, Teddy wanted desperately to know what was going on inside her head, “Uh-huh, so let’s, uh, let’s get started.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence fell as they all focused their thoughts, Teddy tried to picture his uncle. Dark hair and bright eyes, longing for a place to be safe and practice protecting the people he cared about. Teddy could relate. He remembered all the stories and pictured the room from his memory of descriptions his family had told him over the years of his childhood. He pictured dummies for target practice, he pictured a young Harry, Ron, and Hermione sneaking around in the dark hours of the night, lesson planning for the Dumbledore’s Army. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unintentionally he imagined how they must have felt, probably a lot like how he felt right now. Knowing they were the only ones who were capable of saving everything they loved, but not feeling any more reassured with that thought resting in their hearts. He imagined his aunt and her small frame and bushy hair, young and bright-eyed, determined to make sure her best friend’s stayed safe. </span>
  <em>
    <span>The brightest witch of her time</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy glanced over at Ophelia. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The sickening fear reared its ugly head, he knew that he wasn’t the best at anything. Once again he saw his family, he imagined them. He knew that Harry, Teddy glanced at Cas, was the leader, he knew that Harry would lead bravely until the bitter end. Hermione, he pictured Ophelia’s bright eyes, would make sure everything actually happened, he knew she would have a spell for everything and get them out of as many tight situations as humanly possible, and Ron would follow blindly. Teddy could relate. He knew he wouldn't be able to contribute enough, but he was here. He was a part of this team of incredibly talented wizards and witches trying to save the world, terrified of what’s to come. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because he didn’t have Cas’, or Harry’s, bravery. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t have Ophelia and Hermione’s mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t have Al’s, or Ron’s, consistency, the loyalty they shared. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t have Scorpius and Draco’s quick wit, he didn’t have their talent. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was just Teddy and that’s what plagued his whole body with worry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dumbledore’s Army. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dumbledore’s Army. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dumbledore’s Army. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The wall came to life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stones shifted and writhed until a heavy-looking door appeared in front of the group of five, complete with creepy dungeon latches and iron decals. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wouldcha look at that.” Teddy broke the silence first, and tried to push every thought that had just passed through his mind out, he shrugged, “Let’s get this show on the road.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas made a weird strangle-ish sound, “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>own</span>
  </em>
  <span> this road.” Her voice cracked but her expression didn’t give any clues as to what was going on in her mind. Ophelia looked at her best friend like her heart had just broken, she moved to put a comforting hand on her shoulder. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The season’s not over yet,” She mumbled, gripping the large latch on the barrier in front of them and pulling with a surprising amount of strength. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It full-on horror-movie-creaked open. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thick smell of dust hit Teddy’s nose when he walked into the wide-open space, scattered at random places hammocks of all different colors and sizes hung. A hodgepodge of pillows and comfortable looking chairs lined the walls, Teddy could picture what it must have been like full of students finding refuge in their little sliver of the school that was still theirs. Teddy’s heart drooped at the little personal details covered in dust littered throughout the space. A picture here, a drawing there, a few forgotten letters, a teddy bear, all forgotten or lost in the chaos of the war. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the corner against the wall was a large desk with a radio looking contraption that Teddy would probably break if he tried to use. Above was an extensive map, he wandered over to get a closer look, sections of it were labeled with names of infamous wizards, Deatheater’s, it was like they were tracking them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy shivered. Not able to stop the feeling that they were somehow repeating history. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Loudmouth!” Ophelia called from across the room where they all stood in front of an uncomfortably small looking tunnel. Guess they found the passage. “We’re gonna miss our train, come on!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without sparing another thought to the growing pit of anxiety in his stomach he followed his friends into the tunnel. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hogwarts is my home</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Goodbye. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They emerged in Aberforth’s former pub and took off into the dark of Hogsmeade. He matched pace with the group as they weaved through the quaint shops, covered by the protection of the shadows. By the time they got to the train station Teddy’s lungs burned with the exertion from running and the cold air, he had been inhaling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Only one entrance to the train was open, the warm light shined on the gruff-looking conductor’s back, illuminating his face from the sides. He surveyed them with suspicion but didn’t seem to get paid enough to care to ask where they were going. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Don’t think. Don’t think. Don’t think. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t think</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Teddy chanted to himself, everything felt wrong, everything felt terrifying. But he knew it was right, he knew he would do nothing less. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t think</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia smiled tightly and handed him her ticket. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A short grin later Cas had followed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius didn’t meet the man’s eye. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al mumbled something about a “goddamn tragedy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You kids have a long journey ahead of you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I know.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter 17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Minerva McGonagall sighed tiredly, slowly sinking into the crimson upholstered armchair behind the centuries-old desk she worked at. Behind closed doors, the normally stoic and patient headmistress let her head fall in defeat to rest between her hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Why does it always have to be me?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She had awoken the morning before, just as she always did, hours before the rest of the castle. Pulling herself together physically and mentally, she’d finished up some last-minute tedious projects before heading to the Great Hall with the rest of Hogwarts for breakfast. Enjoying her usual plate of bangers and mash, she had not even an inkling of what the day would hold. Making her way to her first class of the day, Minerva waited patiently for the sixth year Gryffindors and Slytherins to arrive as she did every day. They came, as expected, slightly late but ready to begin. Scanning the classroom, McGonagall quickly noted that Cas Weasley was absent from her customary seat. Even more surprisingly, the seat next to it was empty as well, void of anyone remotely resembling Ophelia.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her concern grew like weeds as she next checked for Albus and Scorpius, finding as she had hated to expect, that they were gone too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Trying to calm her erratic heartbeat, Minerva made a mental note to discreetly question Teddy Lupin when he arrived in a few hours.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he never did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What she would’ve attributed to something minor on any normal day seemed to be evolving into something much more worrisome. She’d steadied herself at her desk, tried to distract herself with grading the second years’ essays of the day (which she failed at miserably), and then attempted to rationalize the moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was strange that all five of them were missing, yes....but it would’ve been much more confusing if the students in question had no relationship to each other, which was untrue. Seeing as all five absentees were friends, McGongogall reasoned, they were probably together. That was good. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’d turn up together then, too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So she waited. Waited all through what would’ve been a free class period, waited through dinner, waited through a sleepless night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But by the next day at noon, when nothing had yielded any results and other teachers had begun to wonder, Minerva was done waiting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Swallowing her pride, McGonagall took her worries to Argus Filch, whom she made promise to search low and high all around the grounds for the five students.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Her </span>
  </em>
  <span>students. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She could remember with perfect accuracy his reply late that night when he returned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing, ma’am,” he’d grunted, “Searched everywhere, too: Hagrid’s, every single floor of the castle, even the outskirts of the forest. Wherever they are, it’s not here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a moment, the prickle of pure terror washed over her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The forest…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. No, no. Even the children of some of her most troublesome students wouldn’t be that stupid.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So where the hell were they?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As the stars were just beginning to fade that second night, the thought came to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She might know who might.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Professor, with all due respect, did you really have to call us at 2 in the morning? A guy needs his beauty sleep.” James Potter whined as he entered her office several minutes later. “I’m tired.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Ian Kent added with a smirk, “beauty sleep is something you definitely need.” This earned him a halfhearted slap from James.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuc--I mean, shut up, Kent.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two continued to bicker as the rest arrived. She’d notified all of them, just to be safe. At least one of them had to know what was going on.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Roxanne and Fred Weasley came next, together, looking equally tired and concerned as they took seats in the chairs Minerva magically provided. Then, it was Milo Chance and Jonah Peters, one after the other, seeming to be barely awake at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She cleared the anxiety from her throat. “Children,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was surprised at how exhausted she herself sounded. Six heads turned expectantly in her direction. “I just have a few questions for you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ian rolled his eyes dramatically. “Questions? At two in the--” a pointed look from Roxanne seemed to stop him in his tracks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is it, Professor?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She exhaled slowly before training her eyes on them in turn. “Have you seen Cas or Ophelia lately? Perhaps Teddy or Albus? Maybe even Scorpius Malfoy? It’s come to my attention that they haven’t been present the past couple of days. Would any of you happen to know anything about that?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All six pairs of eyes fell to the floor. Fred scratched his head awkwardly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whaaaaaat? N-no, of course not. We don’t...know...anything about that.” Roxanne shifted her weight out of her chair, full-on elbowing Fred in the ribs. “Ow! Rox, what the hell!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one else. Milo shifted uncomfortably in his seat, giving Jonah an impressive side-eye. The latter of the two determinedly avoided Milo’s gaze, fidgeting with his hands rather harshly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before her eyebrows could raise any higher than their restful position, Minerva reminded herself that this was most definitely not the time to be reading into student on student subtext. Especially not when other students were missing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She let her eyes sweep the entire group again. “Anyone?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence. Ian and James were exchanging looks, but as soon as Fred would look back at them they were immediately set on avoiding one another’s gazes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope.” Roxanne voiced at last. “We’re not sure what’s happened.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was the best liar out of all six, to be sure. Almost good enough to fool her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She let out a heavy sigh. “Fine. If you have absolutely no idea what’s happened, maybe you have thoughts on where they could’ve gone? Where they might be now?”.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If it were possible for silence to grow even quieter, Minerva would’ve attested till the day she died that it just had. Fred choked down a scoff.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, we don’t know.” He gestured to them tiredly before he seemed to forget how to properly breathe. He froze right arm in mid-air, head ever so slightly tilted toward the ceiling. Only his eyes moved, shifting all around the room to look at his comrades as if some great bomb had just gone off behind his eyes. “We...don’t know where they are.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where are they?” He echoed himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The quiet was ruined.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were extremely skilled in talking over each other, Minerva had to give them that. However, her stomach dropped as she deduced that something heavy had just settled over these older, supposedly wiser counterparts. They actually had no way of knowing where the missing links in their families were.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were gone. Definitely, indisputably gone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But not a single person in this castle could tell her where.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The ruckus continued. Roxanne had both hands on her chest as if clutching an imaginary string of pearls. She was bent slightly, breathing heavy, trying it seemed to grasp on to something, anything that was still stable. “My baby,” she whispered in a barely audible voice. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fred, for once in his zest-filled life, was completely silent. His knee was bouncing uncontrollably, his eyes focused on something much farther away than the walls of this room could contain.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah wasn’t much better. He was looking to the ceiling, removing and placing his head in his hands periodically, a vicious cycle of extreme emotion that Minerva couldn’t read. He seemed as if trying to refrain from crying and punching something at the same time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo, beside him, was deep in thought. He had placed a comforting hand on Jonah’s shoulder, but remained fairly quiet, ever so often mumbling to himself words that Minerva couldn’t quite comprehend, words she felt like she was intruding upon. He seemed hell-bent on recalling something, running a memory through his mind over and over again like water through a sieve, trying desperately to keep it in his grasp.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>James and Ian seemed to once again be conspiring between the two of them, but any trace of happiness or mischief had disappeared from their tones. It seemed to be as if they were sharing a communal fear, one they didn’t want to lend to an audience, one so deep and desperate Minerva almost felt the need to look away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She walked around her great oak desk, perching herself on the edge in front of her students. “Alright, thank you,” she said in a frail voice. “If you manage to remember anything, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me personally. No apologies or appointments required.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was the oldest she’d ever felt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They sat there, the children, their eyes too bright, and their minds too dark to dwell on. She offered a small smile. “Go on now, get some rest. Take tomorrow off of classes, would you?” She paused for a moment as they slowly began to rise from their seats. Something in Roxanne’s eye made her want to offer reassurance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something. Anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We will find them,” she said, cringing at how certain her voice sounded. Tying her inhibitions into knots, she smiled again, tight-lipped. “I promise.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They filed out of her office just as they’d arrived, in one large group. Now much more awake but no more certain, they quietly returned to their common rooms. Milo and Jonah exited last, the former wrapping his hand around the door handle and pulling it closed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before she heard the customary click, however, McGonagall found herself stopping them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, and boys?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They rounded the door again. “Yes, Professor?” Jonah voiced, the sound seeming much farther away than it should’ve. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Be careful. Don’t do anything rash, please. Keep your wits about you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo grinned. “Don’t you worry about us, Professor.” As he closed the door for the final time that night, she thought she caught the tail end of a comment, just barely a whisper. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>We have other plans</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Straightening her stance, Minerva slowly rounded her desk corner once more and took a seat in that big armchair. She imagined the five of them, god knows where happy or fearful, in danger or safe, ultimately trying to measure up to something they should never have to. Then, the six others, returning to their beds even though she knew they were sure no one would be getting much sleep tonight. For them, it meant fear and uncertainty.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For her…</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Well</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thought to herself as she pulled out her wand from the pocket of her cloak,</span>
  <em>
    <span> I have to make some house calls.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Needless to say, Minerva nearly jumped out of her skin when no less than eight people burst into the room around half an hour later. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If her memory served, she had closed her message with a “please send a return message via letter or Patronus to discuss next steps” not “show up at my office with virtually no warning in the middle of the night”.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She supposed she shouldn’t have expected anything else. Sighing, she magically brought the chairs back out and set them around the room.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Here we go.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Into the room swept seven of her previous students and one more who was easy to recognize.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry, Ginny, Luna, George, Angelina, Bill, Fleur, and Draco stumbled in with a chorus of halfhearted hellos. Most took their seats, and McGonagall forced herself to swallow her personal opinions as Harry, Draco, and Angelia elected to stand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Figures.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just by looking at them, Minerva could tell who received the message between the couples. George and Fleur looked at each other with a mask of confusion gracing their faces, as if the tense silence in the room held some unspoken answer as to why they’d all been called.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, Bill had to be the one to break it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We came as soon as we heard, Minnie.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t call me that.” she tried to respond good-naturedly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t ask you to show up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That makes it real.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Harry tacked on. “So, uh,” he cleared his throat. “What the hell happened?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I told you in my bloody message, Potter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took a deep breath. “As I said, your children,” she gestured to the room, “all five of them, disappeared from the castle two nights ago. We’ve been looking for them ever since, but it seems as if they’ve...left the school.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She regretted it as soon as the words left her mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It would’ve been almost comical how similar Angelina’s reaction had been to Roxanne’s, but the similarity only deepened the pit in Minerva’s stomach. George and Ginny were talking over each other, both voices pulling up for air above the roar of their crowd. Harry and Bill seemed to be rashly weighing options, as Minerva caught phrases like “Don’t you have any idea where they could be?” and “How long would it take us to get there?”. Fleur and Luna seemed to have kept the most composure, and were discussing amongst themselves how surprised they were that their children would’ve gone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco seemed to be on another plane of existence entirely. He spluttered, slightly separated from the group as he grasped for straws. “What?!” was the first cohesive word to fall from his mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Surprisingly, although Minerva had been absent-mindedly trying to quiet them down the whole time, this one short word silenced the entire group.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was the first time Draco had spoken, and everyone else seemed...surprised. Like he was a lamp who’d just decided to come to life and start discussing the topic at hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Considering their history, she supposed, this was in fact probably how it seemed to the rest of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They all waited with bated breath as Draco struggled to find his words. “Why?” he finally choked out. George scoffed, much less effective at hiding it than his son.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Riveting.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This seemed to pull Malfoy back to reality. “Not just “why”,” he imitated George’s tone here, “you...you arse! I mean why now? And why with all of </span>
  <em>
    <span>yours</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” The last word was dipped in malice and... well, if Minerva wasn’t mistaken, a bit of remorse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ginny laughed at this. “Honestly, Draco? Is it that hard to believe that your son had better taste in friends than you did--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ginny!” Bill placed a cautionary hand on her shoulder, “Don’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco, however, disregarded this sentiment. “On the contrary, Ginny, I happen to know my son quite well.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For some reason, it made Minerva want to laugh. Yet, the blond wasn’t done. “He’s not...not righteous like you lot were, hell, like I was, like your children seem to be. He’s too cautious he would never put his life on the line for something greater than himself, that’s just not who he is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something behind Minerva’s eyes took her back to the end of last year, to the hospital wing, the badly formulated excuses as to why he’d been so utterly destroyed, a limp Cas in his arms, the boy who stayed by her, everyone’s sides for weeks; laughed, cried, joked with them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not righteous, huh?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But she bit her tongue. Chose not to speak.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It seems to me,” Luna broke the silence in her quiet, certain way, “That you might not know Scorpius as well as you think you do, Draco.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco Malfoy snapped like a goddamn rubber band. “And since when does he even associate with you lot? In five years, he’s never mentioned any of your kids, not even a name--why would he care so goddamn much that he’d actually go out and risk his life like a bloody idiot--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She could hear it, in his tone. Under the regret, the hurt, the inkling that he was in fact estranged from not only his former classmates, but his very own </span>
  <em>
    <span>child</span>
  </em>
  <span>, was an undertone, a very inkling, of</span>
  <em>
    <span> care.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Beneath all of the conceitedness and the grandeur, Draco Malfoy was no different than he’d been over a decade ago.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If she was honest, none of them were.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Children on opposing sides...forced to grow up before any child should have to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hated to think that their own children would end up facing the same tribulation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh!” Harry cut in, “caring for others makes him a “bloody idiot” does it? I suppose that would make you a fucking genius, then--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Harry!” It was Angelina who’d spoken. “Do we really have to do this? </span>
  <em>
    <span>All of this</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Tonight, when our children are </span>
  <em>
    <span>missing</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Thank fucking god for that woman.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you</span>
  <em>
    <span> aware</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Draco?” Minvera continued for her before she could stop herself, “that your son is in fact responsible for saving the life of Cassiane Weasley in this prior year? Or that he’s been “associating” in this group of five up until the day he’s left?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?!” Harry and Draco both seethed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They immediately whipped around to face each other, staring in a silent stand-off and waiting for the other to react. Both men knew the other was much too stubborn and had a bit more will-power than they used to, so neither said a word.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Minerva was immediately struck by how similar the two were. Forced to grow up and away from each other, of course,</span>
  <em>
    <span> family always came first</span>
  </em>
  <span>. But when she really looked at them, she could see it. The friendship that neither would have permission to act on, the deep understanding hidden behind varying experiences in the war, the mutual loss, the grief, the knowing that there were only two ways that this could end up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How funny that one refused handshake could pull two people worlds and miles apart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She cleared the awkward silence and newfound tears from her throat and spoke. “All of </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>aside, we need to discuss what happens next.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,</span>
  <em>
    <span> thank</span>
  </em>
  <span> you.” George exclaimed, rubbing his eyes. “Do any of us know what the hell is actually</span>
  <em>
    <span> happening</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, at the moment, no one has any idea where they’ve gone.” She held up a hand to stop the angry bickering that ensued. “I’m actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>quite</span>
  </em>
  <span> sure that your other children might have some idea as to why, but as they’ve proved infuriatingly loyal and extremely unhelpful already, we’ve got nothing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For once, there was silence, as the suffocating weight of the situation seemed to sink in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She continued on. “We won’t hesitate to keep looking. Filch has already performed an extensive search of the grounds, obviously yielding no results. However, I have found their belongings very neatly packed and removed: so saying, they probably planned this. They have some idea of where they’re going and what they’re doing. They’re some of....” her throat burned as she surveyed these eight people, adults, who had once and were once again looking up to her for answers. “Some of the brightest students I have...they wouldn’t have done this without knowing what it meant.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Minerva noticed, as she continued, that Draco had gravitated much closer to the other seven, integrating within the broken crowd.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one truly seemed to mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry spoke up quietly. “So, what now? If we don’t know why they’ve left, how’re we supposed to anticipate where they’ve gone? Where they’re going next?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shit. Why’d he have to be so bloody smart? “Well, as you might be </span>
  <em>
    <span>surprised </span>
  </em>
  <span>to know, you aren’t the only people I’ve called. I’ve alerted some old friends and a few of the ministry representatives who specialize in this kind of thing, they’ll be surveying the country and keeping a constant correspondence with me. That should be a good place to start.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry rose up to his full height. “Let me join them.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco rolled his eyes in extreme exasperation. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t-</span>
  </em>
  <span>-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m an Auror,” he continued, putting extreme emphasis on the word and sending Draco a pointed look. “I know what I’m doing, I could--”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What? Almost get yourself killed again? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You barely made it through last time, Potter, we aren’t doing this again. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“They’ll handle it, Harry.” she cautioned with every scrap of authority she could muster.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After all these years, he still backed down. Cowered a bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>That’s it.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She smiled softly. Tired. “Please go home, all of you. Get some rest. I’ll contact you as soon as I get word of anything.” Tersely nodding, Draco, Harry, and Bill headed for the door. The others rose slower, congregating in a group by the door as they filed out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She watched those eight; that found, torn apart chosen family.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She thought of Scorpius and Cas, the too-long looks shared between them even when at odds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of Ophelia and Teddy, the knowing looks and unspoken words that followed them, thick in the air like perfume.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of Al and Jonah, the young love they’d finally found just to have it snatched away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even of Cas and Ophelia, ever the other’s rock, working together like a perfectly built machine, two girl’s who’d found each other and held on, for better or for worse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The phrase “blood is thicker than water” came to mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yes, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she thought</span>
  <em>
    <span>, but you can drown in both.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She hoped at the very least, her five dearest students knew how to swim.</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius sat uncomfortably in the booth nearest to the doors of this train, watching anxiously as the shadowed countryside sped past out the window. A blur of deep greens, blues, and black painted the landscape, and his eyes desperately tried to make out anything recognizable. Any last glimpse of everything he was leaving behind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, he supposed, everything wasn’t much. Everything he’d been afraid of leaving was in the train car with him, inexplicably quiet and civil in such a situation. Hogwarts was his home, certainly, but he found more comfort in the people he’d shared it with. At the end of the day, the castle was just a house of sorts; his friends were what truly made it home. And here he was, with those friends, actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>doing</span>
  </em>
  <span> this. Actually leaving everything he knew miles and miles behind him, without telling anyone else, completely and utterly disobeying every rule he’d ever had set in place for him. Still, he knew that being willing to do any and all of that showed how truly important this mission was. When years ago he would’ve been comfortable staying quiet within the prison of his comfort zone, here he was now risking everything with just a few others, trying to save everything he knew and didn’t know. How perfectly developmental of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even now, past the anxiety and fear of the unknown and anticipation of the danger that was to come, was complete and utter wonder that he was here. Not just here, on this journey, doing what he was doing, but here, in this train car, with his best friends whom he’d caused to hate him. And who didn’t anymore? They were back and he was him again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, mostly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius knew that he’d never feel completely right again until he filled the gaping hole in his chest that grew a little every time he thought of Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, to make matters worse, he was around her all the time too. A constant reminder of everything he still had left to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But for now, they sat there in apprehensive silence, waiting for this train ride to be over and the end to begin. A few moments in, Cas and Ophelia made the attempt at some small talk, something that Teddy eagerly jumped on and pulled to evolve into a cheerful conversation. Scorpius marveled at how easily they were able to create such a false sense of normalcy and would’ve joined in too if it weren’t for the fact that everything in him knew that was a bad idea. He chose instead to try a conversation on the side with Al, but when Scorpius turned to him, the look on his best friend’s face made him stop.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was concentrated, deep in thought, and focused on something far away. The total absence of light in his eyes made Scorpius falter. “Hey, you okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tried to ignore how the conversation beside him became slightly quieter. He waited, expecting a forced “definitely” and a subject change into something Scorpius would actually take part in. However, Al let his head fall with a thud to rest in his hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The other three continued to talk, but Scorpius could feel a pair of eyes on him. He forced himself not to turn around, knowing that the burning curiosity was so much more bearable than the realization of who might be staring.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He chose instead to focus on his best friend: The dark, tousled hair, the bright green eyes, and the sadness of his features. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al needed him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you wanna talk about it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instantaneously, Al let out a pent-up sigh of sorrow and resignation. “It’s...it’s nothing. It should be nothing, it’s just...”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Painfully more than nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius could understand that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jonah.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yep. “Al--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, I knew it was coming, right? I knew I had to do it. There was no way I was going to let him in on this, make him deal with this or us or me right now when everything is going to shit and for some reason, we’ve decided that we’re the only ones who can stop it. And hey, we probably fucking are. But that didn’t make it easier to do. To...t-to break up with him and not really be able to explain why to have to keep saying it and saying it and saying no matter how much he protested or said he’d wait I just--had to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Scorpius tried to comfort Al with his tone as well as his words, wishing he could reach across the empty space to place a hand on his shoulder, or hug him, or something, but knowing that doing so would draw attention to them and reveal something that felt indisputably private. “Hey, listen. Jonah understands, I know he does. He’s probably really fucking proud of you, Al, I know I would be. He knows that this is important to you, hell, important to everyone, and the existence of everything. Without us doing this, there would be no him to come back to and the most important thing right now is making sure that doesn’t happen. You did what you had to. Although,” he added on as he caught Al’s sad smile. “I’m sure he’s still gonna wait for you though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks, Scorpius.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment was interrupted by a scoff from behind him. Erasing any willpower he may have had, Scorpius whipped around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d known before he even looked who it would be.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas wasn’t staring at either of them, though. She was focused on her hands, folded in her lap, a dark smirk painting her face. “My, how times have changed.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence that ensued was charged with tension. So many words seemed to be on the tip of Cas’s tongue, and even more swirled around Scorpius’s mouth, his brain too occupied to sort through them. The energy seemed to build within him, a volcano waiting to erupt, before she finally stood abruptly, bumped past Ophelia and exited the compartment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Inhale.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Exhale.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As though his limbs had already made the decision for him, Scorpius found himself standing as well. He avoided Al’s gaze, didn’t even think about glancing up to see Teddy’s, and was feet away from the door leading to the next compartment before a hand around his wrist stopped him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Turning back to look over his shoulder, Scorpius was astonished to see Ophelia, hand circling his lower arm, her eyes a muddle of confusion and...if he wasn’t mistaken, admiration. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure you want to do this?” The tone was cold, judgemental, and laced with ice, but her gaze held something else: A genuine question.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I am.” He said with just as much certainty as he felt for once. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I’ve waited too long to do this. I owe it to her and myself to try. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pulling the sliding door closed behind him, Scorpius let his eyes fall onto Cas. She was pacing up and down the opposite end of the corridor, her face scrunched up and deep in thought. He knew that look all too well. It’d been a while since he’d seen it, he supposed, since he’d been much too far away to worry about things like this for months. Cas was deeply, deeply conflicted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could see the indecisiveness in her face: the angle of her eyebrows, the decision floating invisible before her and her eyes focused on two ultimate outcomes. His wonder as to what she could be pondering was incurable.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He swallowed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Took another deep breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas?” he spoke into the thick silence. She turned, slowly to face him, her gaze a picture of confusion, disdain, and disbelief. Still, she didn’t speak.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He might actually have a chance at this. “Can we talk?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slowly, loudly, Cas began to laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fuck. Guess not.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, so you want to talk, do you? Now? After everything, everything you did and after all the lengths you went to avoid me for fucking months? With your petty ass little pet of a girlfriend?  Please, be my guest if you want to talk now. ” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He steadied himself, reaching for anything to hold onto and trying to find some way to reach her. He didn’t deserve to find one, but he had to try. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, I know you’re mad--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” Her eyebrows shot up, her arms flailing in the air. “How could you tell?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, y’know what, no, you don’t get to “Cas” me.” She turned around, and Scorpius almost thought she was going to make a move to the next train car again, but she turned back to face him a few seconds later. “Actually, can </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> talk to </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>? I wanna know something. I want to know why. What the hell did I do to you, Scorpius?” She thought for a second, “Okay, maybe I overstepped a boundary at the end of last year. Maybe. But what I want to know is how me saying something slightly uncomfortable translated to you fucking blowing up our friendship? Our whole group’s friendship? How did you feel the need to do all of that, the prank, Vicky, everything after that? How bad can I really fucking be?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Don’t fucking do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Scorpius could, he would’ve punched himself in the face. The fact that she thought this was all because of something she did, that she believed that any and all of his stupid ass decisions were her fault, dug deep. It was more uncomfortable than any pain he’d felt before. Worse than keeping up appearances with Vicky, worse than crying himself almost to death on the dormitory floor, worse even than the absence of her, was this. The thought that she could’ve done anything to stop him from being an idiot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, please,” he sounded a lot more desperate than he’d wished he would. “Look, I know that’s how it seems, which shouldn’t be something you have to even worry about because that wasn’t even your fault, it’s just that I-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took a step closer, practically daring him to step back, or back down, or give up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But no. For once in his fucking miserable existence, Scorpius Malfoy was going to stand his ground.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You really think you can explain all of that to me?” She paused for a moment, tearing a hand through her infuriatingly gorgeous red hair, and waited for a response.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He gave her nothing, so she continued. “What the hell do you possibly think you could say to me to make this any better? Do you really think you could--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, I’m fucking trying, Cas!” Scorpius felt his voice raise in volume, felt the painful overwhelm of emotion leave his lips. “If you would be quiet for two goddamn seconds, maybe I would be able to. Give me a chance to breathe, please, I need to explain.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go for it!” She threw her hands up in the air, eyes wide and daring, her lips ghosting a smile and a hysterical laugh dancing on her lips. “Have a fucking heyday! Shoot! Tell me everything you have to say, shout it from the rooftops!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d been waiting for this moment for months and yet he had absolutely no idea what to say. “I’m sorry.” he choked out, begging with every fiber of his body for this to get through to her. “You...you didn’t do anything wrong, I hate that you think you did. None of this is your fault, none of it, it’s--it’s mine. All of this is my fault, I was an absolute dick, and an idiot, and hell, a coward, everything you said about me is true. You didn’t deserve any of it: me blowing you off, ignoring you, pretending that last year never happened...and then there was Vicky.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whatever trance he may have had her in was broken when he said her name.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yeah, I almost forgot! Your conniving bitch of a girlfriend. Where the fuck did you get that idea?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was my biggest mistake!” he cried, his voice breaking but continuing to grow louder. Something inside him softened, though. “Besides everything I did to you. All of you. She...” he searched through the emotional baggage, the self-hatred inducing memories for the right word. “She was so toxic, Cas. It was so bloody</span>
  <em>
    <span> suffocating,</span>
  </em>
  <span> I never...I never could’ve imagined what--who she really--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas scoffed again, her disgust seeming to grow by the second. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Wow,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Scorpius, if she could hear you now! Don’t shit talk your poor little girlfriend. Especially after all the shit you did with her...to me. The comments, the gloating, the fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>prank-</span>
  </em>
  <span>-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There it was. That was the core of all of this: a boundary that should’ve never been crossed, one he never asked anyone to cross but was still inevitably his fault. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It wasn’t me!” he blurted, silencing her once again. When he was certain she was too stunned to answer, Scorpius continued. “Do you really think I’d do that? Even after all the other shit I pulled this year? You really think I’m capable of doing something that bad, stooping that fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>low</span>
  </em>
  <span> after last year and everything that happened and </span>
  <em>
    <span>us</span>
  </em>
  <span>? I would never do anything like that. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Especially</span>
  </em>
  <span> to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But Vicky, your little girlfriend, she’s--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>SHE’S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” Scorpius practically yelled, finally letting the last of the weight that relationship had left him go, letting Cas know, telling himself. Making </span>
  <em>
    <span>sure.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>This seemed to have her genuinely confused. She stuttered. “W-what...what do you </span>
  <em>
    <span>mean,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she’s not your girlfriend?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We broke up,” he said simply. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas looked upon him like he was something foreign, unreadable. Then, her gaze changed to one of mock pity. “Aw, Scorpius, she broke up with you? How perfectly--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I broke up with her. Right before we left. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I ended it.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Again, the lack of understanding passed over her face. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“Why?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was all my fucking mask! I was hiding and I never even liked her in the first place!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It seemed to sink in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, his mind sighed, she understands. She’s getting this. I’m getting </span>
  <em>
    <span>somewhere--</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>WHAT</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” She shrieked, stepping closer and making Scorpius worried.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She might, in fact, be about to punch him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re telling me that you did all of that--with her, </span>
  <em>
    <span>for her</span>
  </em>
  <span>, chose her over all of us, over me and you never even </span>
  <em>
    <span>LIKED</span>
  </em>
  <span> her? You never even--</span>
  <em>
    <span>you--</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She seemed to be short-circuiting. “Why the</span>
  <em>
    <span> fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> would you do something so plainly stupid?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because I’m a coward!” was all that came to mind, “I’m a coward, I was a fucking coward, I don’t know </span>
  <em>
    <span>how </span>
  </em>
  <span>to be anything else, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Stop saying that!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Cas implored with everything she had left. “I get it, Scorpius! You think you’re a coward. But before you say it one more fucking time, tell me why. Why are you a coward, Malfoy?” She took one more step. He could feel her breath now, warm on his nose and cheeks. “What is it that’s scaring you? </span>
  <em>
    <span>What are you so afraid of</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, he’d thought about it before. Still, Scorpius didn’t realize her lips would be this soft, actually as soft as they looked. It was so instinctual that Scorpius didn’t even notice that he was the one who’d kissed her until it was already happening. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was more than he could’ve ever imagined. It was happening. Damn, was it </span>
  <em>
    <span>happening. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He didn’t hesitate to bring both his hands to rest on her freckled cheeks, soft again, afraid of being too much. Doing something wrong. Ruining any of this fleeting moment of perfection. Without thinking, he let his eyes fall closed, eyelashes brushing against her skin, and giving way to unexplainable happiness.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yet, a small voice in the back of his head had to ruin it.</span>
  <em>
    <span> Shit. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Why had he just done that? He’d ruined any chance the previous conversation had given him, he was done. It was over.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slightly, he pulled away. Even the fear couldn’t distract him from how </span>
  <em>
    <span>warm</span>
  </em>
  <span> her eyes looked this close.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, before he could comprehend it, before he had the chance to say anything, back away, even </span>
  <em>
    <span>think</span>
  </em>
  <span>….Cas’s eyes had shamelessly dropped to his lips and with a subtle smirk,</span>
  <em>
    <span> she </span>
  </em>
  <span>was kissing</span>
  <em>
    <span> him. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, she was a good kisser. Fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>figures</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Scorpius let his hands snake their way into Cas’s hair, just as he’d always dreamed, and the redhead threw her arms around his neck. Her lips were slow and passionate and her hands gripped him like she’d never let go, oh </span>
  <em>
    <span>god,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he hoped she never did. Cas pulled him closer, and he let her without any hesitation. The kiss was both passionate and graceful all at once, and Scorpius didn’t even have to stop to think about why or how or later, because this was now and this was good. Cas’s mouth parted slightly, her tongue dragging across Scorpius’s bottom lip.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His tongue found hers, swirling and gentle and never too forceful, just completely </span>
  <em>
    <span>right. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Scorpius couldn’t get over how perfect it was, how completely dumbstruck that their compatibility in this moment made him, how completely ridiculous that they were here, making out like teenagers when they’d never had the time to be that before. Nothing had ever felt so right, especially after he’d endured so much </span>
  <em>
    <span>wrong.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’s lips molded utterly perfectly to his, her tongue so sure against Scorpius’s, one of her free hands gripping the collar of the leather jacket Vicky had once made him self-conscious about, that now had him loving every inch of the moment. Scorpius’s head was spinning, his entire body tingled, he felt moments away from going up in flames, never surfacing, just going out in a picture of fire and perfection. It bordered the line between</span>
  <em>
    <span> too much</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>not enough </span>
  </em>
  <span>and Scorpius didn’t even care that he couldn’t do anything else but </span>
  <em>
    <span>be there.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>This was perfect. It felt perfect.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was </span>
  <em>
    <span>perfect.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Right on cue, then, the kiss slowed. Neediness became tender, urgency became gentle, and oxygen found its way back to Scorpius’s lungs. Cas released the fistful of his jacket, bringing back down from the clouds and to reality. Scorpius brought one hand back down to rest softly on her cheek, the other knotted in her hair. Scorpius shamelessly grinned into the last of the kiss. It became slower....slower...</span>
  <em>
    <span>slower</span>
  </em>
  <span>, until finally they both pulled away and Scorpius stared into Cas’s eyes for the first time in what felt like </span>
  <em>
    <span>days. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Meeting her gaze, he didn’t see the knowing smirk he’d expected, come to know...but a soft smile, Cas’s eyes soft on his, full of </span>
  <em>
    <span>something </span>
  </em>
  <span>that was making his heart do a pirouette. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was…” she breathed, interrupting the glorious silence of not knowing. Scorpius felt a sudden need to step back. Doing so, Cas followed suit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Something.” was the only word Scorpius’s frazzled brain could grab onto.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, that was definitely something.” She hesitated, seeming to be caught on a thought. “Did it--It didn’t…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It…” Scorpius echoed, daring her to shut him down, say it didn’t matter, let him know that this changed nothing, even though there was no debating the fact that </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> was forever going to be different.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m still mad at you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shuffled her feet, eyeing her shoes. “I’m...I should go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Scorpius replied numbly. “Probably.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without another word, Cas brushed past him and made her way back to the group train car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stumbling over to the nearest booth, Scorpius sat, once again alone. Now, in solitude, he allowed the giddy smile to take over his face, to live in the moment for a few more seconds. He didn’t know what this meant. He didn’t know where this was going, what they were now, but for the moment, Scorpius didn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>care</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He’d spent so much of this year worrying, wondering about the future and everything in it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d let himself have tonight. </span>
  <em>
    <span>This moment.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe this moment would have to be enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius knew it could be. But he didn’t want it to.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he let himself wonder for the first time since the beginning of last summer. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe we have a chance. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Howick Northumberland, England was a tiny ass coastal town with rolling hills, old (probably haunted) castles, and long winding, badly paved, roads. It was </span>
  <em>
    <span>also </span>
  </em>
  <span>cold as fuck and so was Cas. She thought that the south was supposed to be warmer, she was pretty sure she had heard that before, maybe not. Still, why did the Horcruxes have to decide to head South during the coldest time of the year? Their oversized tent (complete with a kitchen, a study, five full-sized beds in a “bedroom” of sorts, and a living room, which was completely mind-blowing to Cas) was heated so she didn’t even know where the chill she felt was coming from, she heard Ophelia, Teddy, Al, and Scorpius laugh outside the tent. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh, yeah. That’s why. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything she cared about was on the line, her whole life was on the line. This is more important, her inner voice chided, this is </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything </span>
  </em>
  <span>everything.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So we may have sorta just...kissed?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ophelia spit out the water she had just sipped, “I’M SORRY YOU WHAT?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Cas scratched the back of her neck as the pit in her stomach warmed at the thought of Scorpius’ lips, “Uh, yeah.” Ophelia’s eyes looked like they might pop out of her head, it was not a good look for her. “He um, he kissed me...and then um, I kissed him back.” Without her permission, her mouth curved into a smile. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“He kissed you.” Ophelia repeated, “After everything.” Cas nodded...he did apologize…”AND YOU LET HIM?” She screeched. Cas was somewhere between mortified, elated, and amused, by Ophelia’s reaction. “Cas!” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What?” She threw up her hands, “Fuck, I don't know, Phelia, after all this time, he apologized, he looked horrible. Like, he meant it, and clearly, he made nice with Al and Teddy, so, what’s the harm?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What about you?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What do you mean “What about me?”” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ophelia sighed and sank into the train car seat, “I mean, sure, he apologized, he broke up with Dicky, he went through all the steps to try and make shit better. But what about you?” Cas was still very, very confused. “What does it mean? Like, for the two of you? What does it all mean?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>That was the question Cas was so desperately trying to avoid. She didn’t know. She remembered trying to ask...although her brain was scrambled and it was all foggy. But deep down she knew she was selfish, </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>or desperate, </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>enough to take what she could get, and she kind of hated herself for it. But at this point, she had spent so much time pining over the stupidly attractive, sometimes amazing, Malfoy it seemed like a waste of her time to let this type of...opportunity...pass her by. Even if it didn’t mean anything to him. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It couldn’t have meant anything to him. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It couldn’t, right? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Nope. No. She wouldn’t let that kind of thinking by, because that would guarantee a broken heart and Cas had dealt with enough of that shit. Besides, it was a win-win. She got to kiss away all of her worry and angst, and Scorpius...well, Scorpius got…? She actually had no idea what Scorpius was gaining. Once again, she came to the conclusion that she would not be letting herself care. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Cas?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas?” She snapped back into her body,  away from the memory, away from that conversation. “Cas, did you hear me?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She snapped back into the tent, back onto the couch she was curled up against in the corner of their study, back to her responsibilities to the whole goddamn world. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh?” She craned her neck to look up at Ophelia, standing over Cas with her hands on her hips, “What, no, no I definitely did not hear you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I asked if you had found any other clues.” Cas glanced over at the desk, complete with maps and books and news reports, anything that might help them look for clues as to where the Horcruxes might be, the radio played softly in the background. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Right, because that was what Cas was supposed to be doing. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Not</span>
  </em>
  <span> freaking out about Scorpius Malfoy and his mouth, which could kiss </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> fucking well. Sometimes she forgot that all of this was her idea. Based on the fear that constantly gripped her mind and the anxiety that </span>
  <em>
    <span>constantly</span>
  </em>
  <span> pumped through her veins, it didn’t make much sense. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even the thought of looking for more clues plagued her mind with the guilt and worry of making her best friends do this, all of this. She even made people back at Hogwarts get involved, put them at risk too. Put her family, her older siblings who had always looked out for her, in danger, and all of it was her fault. If anything happened--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, fams!” Al greeted as he, Teddy, and Scorpius walked through the tent entrance. “We come bearing gifts.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius chuckled, “Yeah, luckily for us, the muggles have no idea to look for us.” His light hair was ruffled from apparating and his cheeks were pink, and alive from the cold. The pale scar on his lip contrasted to the color in his cheeks, making it visibly stand out for the first time, in Cas’ knowledge, he carded his fingers through his hair, grinning. Cas’ stomach flipped, “Which means we were able to apparate to fast food. Which is a thing...I had no idea. But it smells” He took in a deep breath, “absolutely </span>
  <em>
    <span>amazing</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The line was totally atrocious, though.” Teddy interrupted, Ophelia smirked next to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Atrocious?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, it means, like, bad.” Teddy grinned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> what it means, Loudmouth.” Al was watching them in curious amusement. “Just wondering when you added </span>
  <em>
    <span>atrocious</span>
  </em>
  <span> to your vocabulary.” Scorpius was digging around the bag, and Cas was thinking about how much she loved the group of people she was with, and how she would have no idea what she would do if anything happened to them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It would all be her fault. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Your fault. All your fault, then how will you live? Knowing they’d all be gone because of you. And your stupid hero complex. All you. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius,” She cleared her throat and tried to stay as passive as humanly possible, four pairs of eyes looked at her, “Can I talk to you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y’all are talking?” Teddy joked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her stomach churned, and if she wasn’t so intent on getting Scorpius alone, she might actually punch Teddy in his </span>
  <em>
    <span>loud</span>
  </em>
  <span> mouth. It had become somewhat of a normal thing over the two weeks since if you could describe any of what was going on between them normal. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She watched Scorpius shift his weight, and gaze towards Cas. She kept her voice as placid as humanly possible, “Now?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned a slight shade of pink and then nodded slightly, once he was within arm's reach she led him to through a door to the living room area. As soon as they were behind the closed door Cas’ casual grip on Scorpius’ arm became desperate, and then she had him against the wall, she crowded up against him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking </span>
  </em>
  <span>stressed.” He smirked hotly, she let her eyes linger on his lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ugh, I know, this whole saving the world stuff really gets on the nerves sometimes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Tell</span>
  </em>
  <span> me about it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His smirk grew, Cas's stomach swooped and something inside her grew very, </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> warm. “I’d rather not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His lips found hers and a hand cupped the back of her neck and the other pulled her towards him at the waist and it was absolutely </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All of her pent up stress and anxiety came flowing out, she kissed him fast and nervous and he molded under her energy. He matched her hands in his hair, with his hands at her waist, pulling her ever closer. He didn’t hesitate to meet her tongue with the same frenetic energy she brought and she loved every single second of it, that was the thing about kissing Scorpius Malfoy, it was, like, this </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> fucked up way of coping. She would come to him with anger and stress and anxiety and he would kiss her hot and messy and heavy until it was just a memory. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius would pull her away with broken eyes and a homesick heart and Cas would kiss him with all the slowness and hurt she felt every time she thought about her family, worrying themselves late into the night, wondering where she was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was this twisted compatibility they had, they had so much emotion so much damage that the other matched with ease, yet somehow, that matching, that understanding made it so much easier to deal with. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And the best part was, Cas didn’t even have to talk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She groaned involuntarily when Scorpius bared his teeth, biting lightly at her lip, consuming Cas’ mind and body, pushing back she tugged at his hair, he grinned under her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Still stressed?” His voice was scratchy as he took in air, Cas might actually die if it stopped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm, just a little.” She grabbed his collar and pulled his head towards her slowly, teasing him, getting just close enough so that their breath could mix. Holding him there, she looked at his insanely green eyes, bright and hungry, watching her with a mix of emotions she couldn’t quite decipher. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Burning up when she heard Scorpius groan, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jesus</span>
  </em>
  <span> Weasley, get on with it.” A giggle bubbled up out of her chest, she kissed him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas?” She jumped so far back that she tripped over a fucking rug and landed gracefully on her ass. Scorpius laughed hysterically, eyes lighting up in surprise. “Scorpius? Come here!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Smooth,” He stated as he reached down to haul her up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas scoffed, “Okay, y’know what?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He jutted out his chin defiantly, infuriating smirk and all, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>What?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her stomach swerved and her cheeks grew uncomfortably warm, “I mean it! I think we found something!” Cas stared at the ground and started towards the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Such a shitty influence, Malfoy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius scoffed in disbelief, “Tell me about it, Weasley.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas looked over her shoulder before pushing the door open, “I’d rather not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius choked on-air as they walked into the study. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Geez, what took you two so long,” Teddy wiggled his eyebrows, “Y’all enjoy sucking each other's faces?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’ heart stopped, she really hoped they’d be able to keep it a secret from him just a little bit longer, and she very pointedly did </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> look at Scorpius. Who, uselessly, had not said anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My god,” Teddy shook his head, “I was just kidding, don’t look so horrified, it was just a joke.” Cas and Scorpius laughed nervously, a dumbstruck Ophelia and Al followed shortly after. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Anyway</span>
  </em>
  <span>, back to what we found.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right,” The blue-haired boy cleared his throat, “Sorry, Phe, take it away.” He grinned, making a depressing attempt at jazz hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, I think I know where the diadem is, and it’s literally only a few towns away like if we were being super careful we could potentially walk.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But, y’know, since we’re, like, wizards we can apparate, right?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not the point I was trying to make, but yes.” She sighed and took a moment to bite her lip, “I have these newspapers from that town,” She looked down, “Beadnell has had an abnormal amount of inexplicable deaths. People hanging from ceilings, citizens found murdered in their homes with no signs of forced entry or disturbance. And since we know that the Horcruxes are manifesting as different...things, I think that since the Grey Lady’s ghost was attached to the diadem, that maybe these abnormal deaths could be the ghosts that the diadem brought too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas looked at the ground, her stomach swirling sickeningly, it made a lot of sense, it meant that the sweet gift of not knowing was being taken away, and now they’d actually have to do something. It was fucking terrifying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow, Phelia, good job.” Al said, his face was somewhere between a smile and a grimace, “I would have never been able to figure that out, it definitely makes sense though.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy laughed and draped an arm around Ophelia’s shoulders, leaning on her playfully, Ophelia hid her blush well. “Props to you, Phe. What’s it like being the brains of the merry bunch of lost travelers?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exhausting,” She punched the inside of his side lightly,  grinned down at her for a split second too long. It was sickening. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,” Scorpius interrupted, “When should we leave?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I propose we pack up in the morning, I want to be able to sleep in my bed tonight,” Teddy spoke up, grinning when he got nods as a reply. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence fell over the group, Ophelia found Cas’ gaze around the same time Scorpius’ wondering eyes did. “Cas, you okay?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looked up, squared her shoulders, and quieted the buzz of worry in her head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Always,” She nodded, “Looks like we’re gonna take a quick visit to Beadnell.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Chapter 20</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Jonah sighed, tearing a hand through his hair as he stumbled his way through the night’s Potions essay. He’d contemplated quitting now and just accepting the failed grade about five times now, but something inside his slightly type-A mind would never allow that. So here he was, scribbling mindless filler onto around three feet of parchment and trying to sound like he cared about the medicinal properties of grindylows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Turning to glance at the textbook he was essentially copying with quill and ink, Jonah noticed something out of place in the margins. Quick to find any reason to abandon his scholarly conquest, he pulled the leatherbound volume in front of him, as to get a better view. Upon closer examination, he realized it was writing. Small, cramped, and neat, interlocking with larger, rounder letters.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al’s writing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, Al’s and his. It was a conversation they’d had in class at some point. Jonah couldn’t have told you when, or what had started it, but somehow he couldn’t do anything but stare, just...watch the pages, scan the inked words over and over again as if the parchment would finally rupture and Al would appear by magic.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I think Slughorn needs a nose job.”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Al had written. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Lord help me, Albus Potter, if I get in trouble for laughing at this I’m dragging you to detention with me.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Sounds fun :)”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Al are you fucking kidding me-”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Your attempt at being threatening fell very short, my friend.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So short that we’re friends now apparently.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What can I say? How does that song go? Don’t want no short di--”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>There were aggressive scribbles for a bit after this point, making the text unreadable. It resumed with Al’s writing once again.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Killjoy.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“This is a school textbook!”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yeah, that I bought with my own money.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You still shouldn’t be writing this shit in it.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Cas also says you’re a killjoy.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Do your work!”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“...Now that I think of it, maybe Ian could use one too.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Maybe we should all just get nose jobs. Conceivably, it wouldn’t be too hard with magic,”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“DO YOUR WORK!”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah felt like absolute shit for almost crying.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was things like this that hurt Jonah the most these days, the things that he tried most desperately to stay away from. Still, at times like these...it was almost impossible to tear his eyes away, unbearably comforting and yet so disheartening. With moments that were so completely vivid, moments like that, it was almost like having Al back with him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was almost good enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was almost him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it wasn’t. It wouldn’t ever be quite real enough. Jonah wouldn’t be completely okay until he knew he was safe, knew he was home.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah wondered if Al was thinking of him too. He hated to admit that he almost hoped for it, that he was selfish enough to pray for some space in Al’s beautiful, chaotic mind...the mind that had once upon decided that being with him was worth it, taking time for him was right. Jonah had never felt more special--and now, never so alone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew that Al had a lot on his plate right now, hell, he always had, there was nothing Al couldn’t do if he put his mind to it. But somehow...he needed Al to know that he was still out there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waiting, even if Al didn’t want him to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah was jolted back to reality as Milo burst through the door. Promptly spilling the rest of his ink all over the desk and pulling his mostly finished essay out of the way just in time, Jonah turned in exasperation toward his best friend. “Dude, respectfully, what the hell?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo decidedly ignored that comment, launching into a hurried speech that Jonah wasn’t even certain was English. It was only then that he was able to take in the wind-messed hair, the flushed cheeks, the shortness of breath and air of urgency that wandered about Milo. He was waving his hands hysterically, so much so that Jonah actually had to walk up to him and grab him by the wrists so he’d stop. “Milo, slow down, what are you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have to come see this!” Milo blurted, more clearly now. “We found this--well, I’m not exactly sure, but it’s wicked and you...come with me!” Without another word, Milo ripped his hands out of his best friend’s grasp, grabbed him by the hand, and pulled Jonah out of the common room, leaving his poor Potions essay to flutter to the ground. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah stumbled his way behind Milo for longer than he cared to count, winding through passageways on foot and in his mind, running while trying to figure out what the hell was this important. Milo was...audacious, to say the least, but Jonah had barely ever seen him like this. The only time he could remember was in their second year after Milo had found Cas in an abandoned classroom, a pair of scissors in her hand and several inches of her previously long hair on the floor. It had taken him at least an hour to calm down, and he’d just barely met Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somehow, this felt even more important. Even more vital, more…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wait. This couldn’t have something to do with Cas, could it? Jonah gulped as he tried his best not to imagine the multitude of things that could’ve gone wrong. Maybe...maybe it was Ophelia? His stomach dropped. </span>
</p><p><span>Or both of them?</span><span><br/></span> <span>Or…</span></p><p>
  <span>Al.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. Jonah fought the urge to puke, imagining waiting for the boy who could never come back. A little voice in the back of his head had been piping up every since Al had snuck out that fateful night, a voice that wouldn’t stop asking if maybe Al had meant it. Maybe he really shouldn’t wait, maybe this was...it. But no matter how painful the thoughts became, Jonah had at least been sure he was coming back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to come back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They ended up on the seventh floor a good while later, stopping at the entrance to a hallway. Only stopping then to catch his breath, Milo leaned against what Jonah imagined was cool stone. Still, the smile never left his friend’s face. Turning to follow what Milo was apparently smiling at, Jonah noticed they weren’t alone after all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the middle of the otherwise empty stone expanse stood Fred and Roxanne Weasley, James Potter, and Ian Kent. After taking a few moments to collect himself, Milo sauntered over to the others. “I finally found him!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Took you long enough,” Ian grumbled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey! We ran all the way here!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, and without telling me what the fuck is going on!” Jonah interceded, searching everyone’s faces for an answer. “So?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Roxanne shifted oddly. “We found...something.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unable to restrain himself, Milo burst forward and pushed open the large door that Jonah had...seemingly just noticed?</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Being essentially shoved inside, Jonah blinked at the bright light, let himself adjust, and finally looked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Holy. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He let his eyes look over the hanging ropes, numerous worn hammocks, tapestries, tables, and maps spread around the vast space. He caught the table in the back...well, more like station, complete with a radio.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew what this was. He’d heard of it before. It was almost deja vu, it was almost like visiting for a second time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you know what this is?” he breathed in complete shock, turning in stilted circles around the room, as if seeing it a second, third, or even fourth time would suddenly make things clearer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Roxanne added, a proud and knowing smile on her face. “We found the room of requirement.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well--yes,” he droned in exasperation, ignoring the slightly hurt look on her face. “But I mean, do you know what used to be here? Who?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-no?” James questioned tentatively.</span>
</p><p><span>“This…” he didn’t even bother to wipe the smile from his face as he found the words. “This is the place. Dumbledore’s Army used to meet here.”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Wasn’t that more of a classroom?” Roxanne bit back.</span></p><p>
  <span>“Yes, but--no, I mean during the second Wizarding War. After Snape took over the school and Death Eaters ruled the place, the D.A. had no choice but to meet here. Our parents...this was where they...This…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow.” was all Fred had to say. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah hurried to the radio before he could stop himself. Fiddling with random buttons, he hoped against all hope that it would turn on, give him </span>
  <em>
    <span>something.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Please, please, please.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But it didn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It whirred and sputtered, but nothing. Jonah couldn’t help but let his head fall with a thud into his hands, any scrap of anticipation leaving him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>God, why couldn’t the universe give him one thing? Just one little piece of solace, something, anything that could distract him from everything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything being</span>
  <em>
    <span> nothing.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He couldn’t do anything, and that was what scared him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why did they have a radio in here anyway?” Fred voiced, sounding more centered but still confused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was like their intercom,” James explained as Milo stared at the empty husk of metal, the only electric thing he’d seen at Hogwarts, the only connection between him and...anyone was this piece of shit that </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t even work</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “They used it to warn Harry, Ron, and Hermione about incoming threats and keep them up to date on things at Hogwarts when everything went to shit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, that’s right!” Roxanne jumped in, “They called it...what, Potter Watch or something?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a chorus of agreement, but Jonah couldn’t bring himself to join in. How could a stupid hunk of wires mean so much to him when he couldn’t even use it? It was true, he could feel it in the air: the past generation of hope, the dreamers who’d holed up here, beaten and bruised and defeated, but knowing they could </span>
  <em>
    <span>help.</span>
  </em>
  <span> They could end this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah didn’t even have that much.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, wait, wait, guys.” Milo’s voice rose above the rest. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>GUYS</span>
  </em>
  <span>!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“WHAT?” Fred yelled back, matching Milo’s volume for no reason. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have the absolute </span>
  <em>
    <span>best </span>
  </em>
  <span>idea.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jonah could feel everyone staring. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” James urged after a while. “What is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We should do that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>That</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A silence followed, thick enough to make Jonah turn around. Milo was pointing eagerly at the radio, his smile wider than Jonah could’ve ever thought possible.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What?!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” James asked again, clearly not getting whatever memo was being given.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>The radio!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Milo implored, wonderment in his voice. “We should do what they did...like, like with the radio show! We could...we could keep the world up to date on everything, and play music, and we’d call it….Weasel Watch!” He said, his voice turning up in tone at the end as he grew excited. Jonah immediately recognized Milo’s nickname for his best friend, feeling a deep twinge of nostalgia as he tried </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> to think about that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In fact, Milo’s idea made him nothing but mad. No. They were helpless. Worthless.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” he scoffed before he could stop himself from speaking. “That would be just peachy, y’know, if the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking radio actually worked</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” He pressed a few buttons for added effect, smiling sadistically as nothing happened.</span>
</p><p><span>He was surprised when this earned him an exasperated sigh from none other than Ian. He walked lazily over to the radio, shoving Jonah from his spot and beginning to...take apart and..</span><em><span>.fix it?</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <span>“You guys are so goddamn </span><em><span>stupid </span></em><span>sometimes, you know that?” Ian mentioned, sticking his wand between his teeth, and rolling up his sleeves. Diving into the mess of cogs and wires, Jonah watched in complete surprise and awe as Ian began pulling wires from what seemed like thin air to attach them to what Jonah assumed were circuits.</span></p><p>
  <span>“Y’know,” Ian mumbled around the wood in his mouth. “I really dunno why I’m here.” Removing it from his mouth, Ian waved it nonchalantly, the cogs inside the radio magically falling into place. “Hanging out with you assholes is so below my paygrade. I really should be anywhere else right now. Literally </span>
  <em>
    <span>anywhere else</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Talking with y’all is worse than pulling teeth, and this radio idea? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Pitiful</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” With one last reprimand, Ian used his wand to seal the radio’s contents back up. Turning a final dial on the front, the thing whirred to life. The static began to sound, wisps of voices floating between the almost-silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is </span>
  <em>
    <span>perfect</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” Milo all but squealed, rushing over to the pair of them. He grabbed the small, black attached mouthpiece, turned to an empty channel, and began to speak in an over-exaggerated low voice. “Testing, testing, one, two, three!” His smile grew even brighter as he realized it was working. “I…” Milo searched for the right words, his eyes lighting up as he spoke. “I have a record player in my dorm.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You do?” Roxanne inquired.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He does.” Jonah couldn’t help but confirm, thinking of the room he shared with Milo. “It’s basically his child.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey--I</span>
  <em>
    <span> knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> it would be useful!” Without another word, Milo sped out of the room. He returned no more than ten minutes later, very out of breath and lugging a very distinct record player. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why is this so </span>
  <em>
    <span>goddamn heavy</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” He gasped, mostly to himself, before setting the radio down heavily next to the radio. “Okay...</span>
  <em>
    <span>let’s do this</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“One thing…” Roxanne cautioned, “How do we know Cas and everyone will listen to us? How do we know they’ll even find this radio channel?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They’ll find it,” Milo assured her, sounding the most confident he had all day. “I</span>
  <em>
    <span> know</span>
  </em>
  <span> they will.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Opening his record player, Milo moved the needle carefully to a very specific spot on the record already placed there. However, instead of firing it up, Milo grabbed the mouthpiece. He looked around the room, at all of them in turn. Jonah did too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fred and Roxanne, close together for comfort, one excited and the other nervous. They exuded an air of loss about them. Hopefully, this would bring some peace of mind to them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>James and Ian, friends yet always at odds, inexplicably united by the absence of their mutual best friend. They really were a perfect pair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Milo, right beside him, eyes overbright and sad, but excited nonetheless. His best friend with an equally large hole in his heart, the hole that Jonah shared, that all of them shared. The hole that only five certain people could remedy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe time didn’t heal all wounds, but action </span>
  <em>
    <span>just might.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Pressing a few buttons with certainty, Milo lifted the receiver to his lips. “Everyone ready?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ready.” Five other voices sounded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As they’d ever be.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The rest of the room was silent as Milo began. The silence between the rest of them seemed almost sacred, as if another voice piercing it would make any chance they had to disappear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe they weren’t helpless after all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe they could </span>
  <em>
    <span>do this.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, hello, hello,</span>
  <em>
    <span> hello</span>
  </em>
  <span> ladies and gentlemen!”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Finally.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Possibly, for once, they could have something good</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Chapter 21</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Two hands gripped Cas’ shoulders and shook until she was pulled out of her deep sleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on, Cas” Ophelia’s face loomed into view, “I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She groaned at someone out of Cas’ immediate line of vision, “she’s not exactly a </span>
  <em>
    <span>morning person</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I swear, getting this girl out of bed is going to be harder than killing the Horcruxes themselves.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas rolled over, wanting to savor the last moments of bliss, wrapped up warm in her duvet, before having to pack up and leave, “I’m not </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>hard to wake up,” She mumbled into her pillow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She heard Scorpius very distinctly scoff, she held her middle finger up towards the top of the tent, “Fuck off, Malfoy, nobody asked you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas get up, we gotta get going.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia, it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> awesome in here, though,” Cas extended an arm towards her best friend, “Come on, you gotta try it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia’s expression held a calculating look, weighing the pros and cons, before grumbling into Cas’s bed. Cas laughed into her back as she flopped an arm around the brunette's waist. “Only for a little, the boys will kill us if we take too long.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, they won’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, they won't’” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas giggled, her heart was a little lighter and her laugh came a little easier whenever she was around Ophelia. “See it’s pretty great.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, yeah, whatever, don’t get too comfy, we still hafta do shit today.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They fell into a comfortable silence as they both mulled over what was ahead of them, what they left behind, and the whelm of emotions they felt every day. Cas felt Ophelia take a deep pull of air. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How are you doing?” She whispered into the crook of her neck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s an impossible question and you know it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, fine, what are you thinking about, right now?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighed again, burying her head deeper into Cas’ pillow. Her heart swelled, she loved that Ophelia felt so comfortable around her, it was an amazing thing to know, that she had someone who loved her just as much as she did. Their friendship was something she never had to think about, it was always there, consistent and steady, which was something Cas had come to count on, especially since literally everything else in her life wasn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everything’s so goddamn hard, like why does everything have to fight us, why can’t we just be?” Ophelia was speaking into her pillow, Cas barely made out the words. “I-I’m just worried that something’s going to happen, something that we can’t take back.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas wished she could tell her everything was going to work out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But she never could be sure.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wanted to say, </span>
  <em>
    <span>same.</span>
  </em>
  <span> But taking a different approach she squeezed her in a tight hug, “Hey, whatever happens, we’ll get through it together.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Ophelia could answer Al and Scorpius walked through the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yo, you guys need to get up before Teddy comes in,” Al joked, Scorpius grinned, catching on. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, come on, Cas, be a little more sympathetic, you’ll make him jealous.” Cas and Ophelia laughed as they untangled themselves from the bedsheets. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You both are </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> asking for an ass-whooping.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia sidled up next to Cas, a mischievous grin playing at her lips. “Did you not hear her? You better run!” She lunged forward and a surprised cackle of laughter escaped the boy's lips as they sprinted through the tent, Cas followed suit and reached out for Al, who was, unfortunately, a lot faster than he looked. They were all out of breath and playfully grabbing at each other by the time they got outside. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ladies, ladies,” Teddy yelled over their mock arguments, “break it up!” Scorpius snuck up behind the two and tugged at their hair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They whipped around, “Scorpius Malfoy, you did not!” Ophelia screeched a huge smile splitting her face, Teddy held her back, looking at Cas for an explanation as to what had gotten into the normal voice of reason in the group. She shrugged, loving when Ophelia’s inner child came out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>said</span>
  </em>
  <span> break it up!” The five of them were all laughter and inside jokes from there on out, somehow they managed to get all of their stuff packed up in a timely-ish manner. Which was an incredible feat considering Teddy’s jokes, Scorpius’ good-natured digs, Al piggybacking off of both of them, and Ophelia and Cas fighting back with a vengeance. With a shock of fondness, Cas realized just how grateful she was that everything had worked itself out, that Scorpius had stopped being a douche and that she was here with these people. Because honestly, she didn’t know if she would be able to handle doing this with anybody else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Got everything?” Ophelia asked for the thousandth time, Cas nodded, her satchel resting between her shoulder blades and her wand safely in the pocket of her flannel. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Teddy, Al, and Scorpius nod and grin around the group. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, then,” Cas started focusing on Beadnell, Ophelia smiled, winking at her, “off we go.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas felt the swooping feeling in her stomach as she jumped into the abyss, making sure to keep her whole being focused on that one place, not letting a single stray thought get away from her. She landed on hard ground feet first and out of breath, birds chirped merrily in the thick forest they had landed in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a few seconds, everyone was silent. The atmosphere was filled with breathing until Cas heard a heart-stopping irregularity, a strangled gasp pierced through the air. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Something was very wrong, the hairs at the back of her neck stood at attention even before she turned around. </span>
  <em>
    <span>God, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she wished she hadn’t turned around. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia stood on one leg, white as a sheet and shaking more violently than Cas thought possible, she sounded like she was being strangled by some invisible hand. Like she was fighting for air and balance with every shred of her willpower. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Phelia</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” Cas’ own voice sounded far away when she finally shrieked out her name, as if in slow motion Ophelia collapsed, hitting the ground with a deafening thud. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hell on Earth had risen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas could barely breathe through her failing lungs, her vision had blurred with the intensity of her stare, she could barely hear over Teddy’s confused yelling. She watched numbly as Teddy rushed to her side grappling at her shoulders, holding onto any solid piece of her he could find. She stumbled back, wanting to do </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything</span>
  </em>
  <span> to get out of this nightmare, her back found solid hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Cas, she splinched” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Al’s voice was quiet and harsh in her ear, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Do something, now!”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She drowned deeper in the ocean of her fear, “I don’t know--how? I was f-focusing, I had it. I had it, I sw-swear. How?” Ophelia's incredulous mumble snapped everything into focus, the ringing quieted and the fog cleared. Her face was pale save for the shining stream of tears that flowed down her face, clammy sweat crusted her hairline, along with the blood. There was </span>
  <em>
    <span>so much</span>
  </em>
  <span> blood. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas felt the bile rise in the back of her throat, Ophelia’s right leg was so mangled that Cas couldn’t identify one singular problem. A large, fist-sized chunk of her thigh was missing, thick blood clots were forming at the edge of the gorge, her blood ran so far up her leg Ophelia’s stomach was drenched. Cas’ stomach heaved violently when she saw the tip of her femur peaking through the mush of muscle and tendons. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia was always, </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span> there, it was time for Cas to step up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She rushed forward, gripped the hand that wasn’t already occupied by a blubbering Teddy. Who looked almost as bad as Ophelia did, his eyes were far off, staring at her face, looking for something that just wasn’t there, looking for a reason, an explanation, a shred of hope. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia?” Her voice shook, but everything became a little bit clear when Ophelia’s eyes focused on her, shocked and filled with fear and pain, “Phelia, where’s the first aid?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She groaned, gripping at her leg desperately trying to make the pain stop, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>In my bag</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, get the cleaner and the regrow stuff she packed,” Cas ordered as she took off her flannel and covered the gaping hole in her best friend’s thigh. Teddy didn’t move, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Teddy!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Cas screeched, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Now!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” He swore and moved to dig through the bag just to the left of Ophelia, his hands shook violently and were covered in Ophelia’s blood. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This is a nightmare.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Cas focused back on her leg, pressure, yeah, pressure was supposed to help with the bleeding. She was pretty sure that was right, pressure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She straightened her arms and put her body weight on the flannel, and Ophelia’s leg, she yelled out, struggling against Cas’ weight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia! Phelia stop, I’m trying to help!” Cas cried out as Ophelia scratched desperately at her arms.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Pressure</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia’s blood started to soak through her shirt. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Pressure</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy swore in confusion when he still couldn’t find the first aid. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God</span>
  <em>
    <span>dammit </span>
  </em>
  <span>Teddy, just summon it!” Cas called out. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Pressure. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia’s chest heaved with a fresh wave of sobs. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Pressure, just keep the pressure</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas gagged when she looked down to see her hands painted red. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Pres--</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I found it!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas snatched the potion from Teddy’s hands, he went back to his post, whispering meaningless promises of recovery in Ophelia’s ear. Immediately she located the cleaning solution, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m so sorry, Phe. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She lifted the flannel and forced herself to focus on the wound, carefully she coated the stringy flesh in the clear potion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hell, once again, rose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia writhed and screamed under her, hitting and clawing at any and every part of Cas and Teddy she could find, Cas felt her own skin tear under Ophelia’s nails. Cas met Teddy’s eyes for a split second and saw her own terror reflected in his eyes, the normally playful hazel was brimming with tears, smearings of blood framed his eyes from wiping with bloody hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas turned away and wretched into the nearest bush. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It’s too much. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Too much. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Then Scorpius was by her side, somehow pale yet flushed, his eyes wide with a carnal type of fear. “Cas, hold on just a little longer,” She shook her head, everything was swimming, her stomach seemed to be floating away from her. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Please</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Ophelia needs you. Come on, we’re right there with you.” She swallowed, the initial panic settling, but her mind cleared. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her stomach swerved, remembering how Scorpius had carried her, how Ophelia stayed by her side, she nodded, “Okay,” She turned towards the group, she didn’t think a gathering of five people could feel so chaotic. “We need to move her, hurry up, Scorpius, Al, set up the tent, put an extra towel over her bed, t-to…” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>There was so much blood.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>They nodded and pulled their wands out, moving with agile speed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas rushed back to Ophelia’s side, she seemed to have gone into some kind of state of shock, her legs had straightened out and looked stiff and pale, her face had quieted to a permanent grimace of pain and confusion. Teddy was up and pacing, never taking his eyes of Ophelia. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Done.” Two breathless voices alerted. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy,” Cas looked up, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Teddy</span>
  </em>
  <span>! Get off of the runway and help us move her!” She was impressed by how harsh her voice sounded if you ignored the crazed worry under it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She opened the flap to the tent and led the boys, and Ophelia, to the bed. They set her down gingerly, she moaned when her leg hit the solid mattress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas took off the ripped, </span>
  <em>
    <span>bloody</span>
  </em>
  <span>, jeans, ignoring how Ophelia screeched in pain, but her eyes watered at the desperate tone of the pleading. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This is right, you know it’s right. She’ll know it's right...later.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“K-k, quick someone be ready with the bandages, we’re gonna put thi-this regrowing stuff on it a-and then we have to bandage, bandage it.” Al grabbed the roll of white cloth and nodded. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whenever you’re ready.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas inhaled sharply before pouring the liquid over the hole, making sure to use it sparingly. Then Al was there, Scorpius lifted her foot so he could get the bandage around her thigh, they wrapped, covering the harsh red with a superficial cover of hope. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy stepped forward with a vile of bright teal pills, “This should help with the pain, it’ll also help her sleep.” He moved towards her, gingerly brushing her sticky hair out of her face, he handled her like she was the most precious thing in his world. Slowly helping her swallow he stared a little too long, suddenly Cas felt like she was intruding on something she would never understand. Al shifted uncomfortably and mumbled something about food before heading out of the tent. Without looking back Cas opened the door to the study, she sunk down to the floor, numbness taking over her being. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She’s going to be okay. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She’s going to be okay. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You did everything you possibly could. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She’s going to be okay. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The mantra repeated over and over again as Cas put her head in her hands, sinking further into her head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Weasley?” Scorpius’ voice broke through the fog of worry that had settled in her mind. His eyes found hers and she saw something in them that terrified her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sympathy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alarms blared in her mind but all she wanted to do was be next to him, so she allowed him to haul her aching body off the floor, she allowed him to wrap her into his arms for the first time, red lights flashed in Cas’ inner eye. Everything told her to pull away, but how could she? He was so warm, and smelled good, and made the nightmare outside of the door seem like a bad memory. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I hate to say this,” He mumbled into the top of her hair, “But you did </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> good, Weasley.” Cas scoffed, her nose tickling the soft sweatshirt he wore, “She’s going to be okay.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas pulled away with a start, Scorpius’ face flashed with hurt, then confusion, “But how can we know that?” Her voice was strained and raw, it held all of her expectations and fears, it hurt so bad, “How can we</span>
  <em>
    <span> know </span>
  </em>
  <span>she’s going to be okay? How can we</span>
  <em>
    <span> know</span>
  </em>
  <span> she’ll be able t-to </span>
  <em>
    <span>walk</span>
  </em>
  <span> again? </span>
  <em>
    <span>How</span>
  </em>
  <span> do </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> know I did everything possible? What if she isn’t okay, what if there was something </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> could have done, instead of </span>
  <em>
    <span>freaking out</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Cas’ eye brimmed with hateful tears, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>How do you kno--</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was cut off by a pair of very familiar lips, slow and sure, and full of something that restarted the alarms. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his, he closed his arms around her waist, the kiss was all-consuming. Swallowing her whole, she let him keep it slow, it made her stomach falter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This had never happened before. He never had kissed her like this before. But then again Ophelia had never been splinched before, she was probably overthinking this. He rubbed her back, taking her broken spirit and making it feel whole again, soothing all of her worries when he pulled away with soft eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was terrifying, but Cas wasn’t about to complain. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He watched her with a sureness that made Cas’ heart drop, he knew she wasn’t going to break, he knew she was too strong for that, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> she did everything humanly possible to help Ophelia. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas,” He whispered, stepping back slowly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes?” She matched his quiet, uncertain tone, it was all so alien. Where was the joke? Where was the smirk? Where was the Scorpius Malfoy she had grown accustomed to? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I--” He paused, rethinking what he was about to say, Cas involuntarily leaned forward, interest peaked. He sighed, giving in to some internal argument he was having, “I think you should probably get some rest, I can’t imagine how tired you are.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas closed her mouth, she hadn’t realized it was open, and looked at her feet, feeling exposed and raw under his gaze. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yeah you’re probably right,” She looked at him, painting a defiant grin on her features, trying to get some normalcy back, “But I’m doing it cause I feel like I’m about to pass out, not because you told me to.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius smirked, gratefully taking her olive branch to the banter they knew inside out, “Sure, whatever you say, Weasley.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Malfoy.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She scowled through a smile that had formed on her lips, the lips that he had just recently kissed--</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No no no no no no no. Nope.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>As she left Scorpius behind and the quiet simmer of anxiety turned back on, she couldn’t help but feel like the group had lost the ignorant bliss not knowing had provided them. Ophelia, covered in blood and writhing in pain, floated in her mind’s eye, but then the floating feeling she got when Scorpius had kissed her returned when she pictured his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe they had lost the gift of the unknown, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe</span>
  </em>
  <span> she had gained something too. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Chapter 22</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ophelia let her thumb trace the smooth, greying edges of the newspaper in her hands as she read, following along the lines of typed text with her opposite index finger. They were about half-way through the extensive pile now: with the five of them working, it’d gone much faster than she’d anticipated. They’d been working for a bit over an hour now, reading through all of their stolen papers from Beadnell, looking through the several (which was very odd to think about) murder cases that’d taken place through the cobblestone streets and shaded neighborhoods in the past couple of weeks. Nothing this gruesome had taken place in Beadnell for decades, a fact that Ophelia had assured them over and over again was actually good: these people weren’t used to any of this, it would take them longer to put two and two together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which gave the five of them even more time to do it themselves.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, she couldn’t help feeling as though the days were passing a little too quickly, the sun sinking through the cobalt sky a little too soon each day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia figured she’d feel much better about the tedious time they’d spent being productive if they hadn’t already wasted so much more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All thanks to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hadn’t known what pain felt like before this week. Hadn’t known how loud she could scream, how everything else was wiped away by the incessant need for it all to stop, stop, </span>
  <em>
    <span>oh god please make it end.</span>
  </em>
  <span> It was one of the only times in her life she hadn’t felt in control.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She needed to be </span>
  <em>
    <span>in control.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She hadn’t truly known until this week how absolutely agonizing being helpless felt. Sure, last year, she’d been stuck in the hospital wing for an even longer stretch of time...but this was different. Back then, she could do things. She was helpful, taking care of her friends who couldn’t necessarily be. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Because that’s what I do best. Help.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Or at least I </span>
  <em>
    <span>did.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, though, she’d been the one confined to a bed, slipping in and out of consciousness, depending on others for her every need. To be honest, after the first two or three days, the physical pain hadn’t even been the worst part.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah, maybe she’d woken up multiple times in the middle of the night, screaming, waking up all of fucking North Humberland as the potion’s effects wore off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe she hadn’t been able to do anything but sit up and lay back down for the better part of four days.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe every time anything had come in contact with her thigh it’d brought tears to her eyes and sometimes elicited a sound from her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe she’d scared the shit out of everyone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe she's scared the shit out of </span>
  <em>
    <span>herself.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But the worst part of it all? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Not being able to help.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Having to leave everything important to Cas, Teddy, Scorpius, and Al, never quite able to substitute kind words and tips for really being in the thick of it, helping to fix things.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was her quest too. She knew it, everyone else knew it. But it almost never felt like it anymore. She had nowhere to go in the middle of a fucking war effort.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was the useless island in a sea of heroes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia tried not to think of all the times she heard Cas crying next to her bed at night and pretended not to hear. All the times any or all of them were forced to stay up all night just because she couldn’t take care of herself, let alone anyone else. The times when she knew something important was happening, knew her family needed her, and could still do nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even now, it was bad.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Thank god,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she’d been able to walk today. Yesterday too, and the day before that. She was making progress. But she was still incomplete, it all still felt wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And even though she knew she shouldn’t be, even though everyone else would assure her she shouldn't be, Ophelia felt so </span>
  <em>
    <span>damn guilty. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It was something that should’ve been so easy. So why wasn’t it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia?” Cas’s voice sounded, seemingly very far away. At the sudden noise, Ophelia snapped up to match gazes with her best friend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You haven’t turned a page for the past ten minutes...you okay? Do you need anything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Do you need anything? She loved Cas for every bit of what she’d done, what she was doing for Ophelia, but every word of comfort just seemed to make her feel even worse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yeah, I’m fine, just...lost in thought I guess.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took a cursory glance over the next few pages, quickly surmised that there was nothing important to be found. Tossing it to the pile, Ophelia surveyed the scene: all of her friends comfortable and yet irreversibly tense, spread around the several apparatuses in the room. Scorpius and Teddy sat together, draped over a worn sofa, while Cas and Ophelia took the two armchairs and Al elected for the floor. The center table was overflowing with an abundance of information. The map was there too, now completely buried in the midst of an anxious dash for info. It’d been extremely helpful earlier, as Ophelia had never even been to Beadnell nor did she have a desire to explore it. If she were honest, Ophelia was ready to leave as soon as possible. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas stood, letting the last of her newspapers fall from her hands to hit the pile with a dull sound. She ran a hand through her hair, smiling at each of them in turn.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia, of course, didn’t miss the calculated look she and Scorpius shared.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their eyes screamed something unsaid between them, and Ophelia was brutally reminded of the looks she and Cas always shared, able to have conversations without ever uttering a word. This was different, though...this look held everything a conversation (verbal or not) could ever say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A quote from one of the muggle books her mother used to read to her by lamplight floated into her mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She was two for three.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia shuddered to think of what her younger self, ever messy hair and running nose, too-bright eyes, and too big boots would think of her now. She supposed she was sort of an alienation; a foreign and yet so familiar version of the heroes whom she’d dreamed about. She’d promised herself long ago that if she ever had the chance to, Ophelia would fight like them, be like them, love as fiercely as them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She now knew that all of that never came without a price.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every free moment, Ophelia’s eyes couldn’t help but lock on Cas. Specifically, Cas’s arm. She forced herself to stare, to focus, to just watch her, every time she flinched after moving wrong, the slightly raised, angry red gashes in the shape of her own nails bearing down on otherwise untouched skin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t only the fact that she had been so stupid and </span>
  <em>
    <span>blind.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It was that fact that now everyone else was paying for her mistake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Each mark, each lost drop of blood seemed to be scarred on Ophelia’s own heart, healing over her mind, making her hate, hate, </span>
  <em>
    <span>hate</span>
  </em>
  <span> everything about that day, everything about </span>
  <em>
    <span>herself.</span>
  </em>
</p><p><span>“Phelia!” </span><span><br/></span> <span>It was Al’s voice this time. “Phelia, hello?” He waved a hand in front of her face, poking at her nose at the last second. “Where’d you go? You sure you’re okay?”</span></p><p>
  <span>“Yeah!” She plastered on a smile, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear and tucking her unending thoughts away to get lost in later. “What’d you need?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was just saying we should call it a day,” Cas chimed in, “We’re already more than half-way, and nothing yet, so I think we should just pick this up tomorrow and figure out dinner.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ooh!” Al cut back in, “We should go pick up food from that little pub down the way. I can always smell whatever they’re making from here, I bet it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>amazing</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius leaned in, breaking the conversation physically and verbally. “We don’t have that much money with us though. Are we sure that’s a good idea?” Cas rolled her eyes playfully.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C’mon, live a little, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Malfoy.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The smile on Cas’s face was suddenly mirrored in the blond’s wide grin. “Okay, whatever.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia pulled herself to stand, pretended she didn’t see Teddy’s concerned look as she winced and grabbed the chair arm for a moment, and mostly walked over to Cas. “I’ll come with you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas gave her a hesitant look, filled with something she couldn’t quite place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t pity, thank god. “I dunno, Phelia--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Please,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” she implored quietly. “Being here is driving me crazy. Besides, I’ve been a bit preoccupied and we haven’t really had a chance to talk.” She spared a glance at Scorpius, and Cas, although seemingly exasperated, caught on.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, okay, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fine.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She pulled on a jacket and tossed Ophelia her own. “We’ll be back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy nodded, lazily saluting the two of them. Al and Scorpius muttered their goodbyes as they shifted into the next room, apparently searching for the battered deck of cards one or the other had elected to bring. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As Ophelia left the tent, she caught Scorpius gripping Cas by the shoulder out of the corner of her eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” he spoke quietly, in a rush, as if his vocal chords were about to disappear. “Be careful, Weasley.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Always,” Cas offered a small smile, a meaningful look. With one last squeeze of her shoulder, Scorpius moved to sit beside Al on the floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia bumped into Cas suggestively as she caught up. “What was that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Absolutely nothing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh-huh.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They began to travel in comfortable silence down the dirt road, waiting for it to turn to cobblestone and avoiding the low hanging trees. Cas kept glancing over to her, almost certainly waiting for an incentive to begin a conversation, but something in Ophelia just couldn’t give it to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She knew as soon as she opened her mouth, she’d say a lot of things that were probably better off kept to herself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia,” Cas echoed suddenly, concern lacing her voice. “You know you can talk to me, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was audacious to Ophelia that Cas would ever believe that Ophelia doubted that fact.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, Cas, I know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And when I ask if you’re okay, I mean that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.” Ophelia let out a heavy sigh.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck it.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas slowed her walk, almost to a stop. “What is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia kept the motion going, but also elected to go slowly, not caring when or even if they reached the pub anymore. “It’s just...I feel guilty.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For everything!” It took everything she had not to scream. “It’s just...well, I hurt you, Cas. I would nev--never want to do that, ever. Now you’re paying for my mistake. And I know it’s stupid, and I shouldn’t feel bad because apparently it isn’t my fault even though it definitely is, and I know your cuts aren’t even that bad but that doesn’t change the fact that I did it. I hurt you. And I can’t take that back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’s eyes held so much sadness for her best friend. “Phelia, you know I would </span>
  <em>
    <span>never </span>
  </em>
  <span>blame you for something like that--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know what my dad used to tell me, Cas?” Phelia interrupted, feeling herself teetering on the cliff of hysteria. “He used to say, </span>
  <em>
    <span>“Every time you do something wrong, you hammer a nail into a piece of wood. After, when you’re sorry, you can feel bad and you can try, maybe even succeed in pulling the nail out, but guess what? The wood is still full of holes.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>and that's…” her voice trailed off. “That’s what I did, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Phelia, you didn’t, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”  Cas turned her best friend around, holding Ophelia by both shoulders and shaking her, just a bit. “I know you would never purposefully hurt me. You barely did, it’s...it’s not even that bad, but I know it means a lot to you, so let me just make sure you know: You didn’t do anything wrong. You don’t have anything to feel guilty about. I know that. Everyone else knows that. Someday, I hope you can believe me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded, letting Cas swipe away the single tear she’d let fall. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. Okay, yeah. Thanks.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wrapping an arm tightly around her shoulders, Cas steered Ophelia back to the road, picking up their pace so that in no time, they’d reached the small, slightly crooked building.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al was right. It smelled </span>
  <em>
    <span>heavenly. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Walking into the warmth of the comfortably small pub, Ophelia and Cas took a moment to look over their options, finally setting on anything and everything that met their three criteria: it was cheap, it was sure to be a crowd-pleaser, and it was hot. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stepping into a small alcove by the door, they waited in the warm room as their food was prepared, taking in and appreciating the atmosphere.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y’know,” Ophelia voiced, “If we weren’t currently on a mission to save the world, this might actually be a cute place to visit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, too bad.” Cas agreed. The silence fell between them again, but Ophelia spoke up, switching to the conversation she’d most eagerly been waiting to have.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So...how have things been with you and Scorpius?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas seemed a lot more surprised than Ophelia would’ve expected. “What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well I mean...it’s kind of obvious something’s changed and I was just...wondering where you stood.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas sighed tiredly. “Well, there was this...kiss. That day. After, well...y’know, </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It seemed as though Cas had already told this story, her words forming easily although they were stilted, wrapping around Ophelia’s consciousness and tugging at her curiosity.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It seems there has been a lot of those lately, Cas.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well-well yeah, there’s that, it’s just...this was different. It made things so much more complicated and we haven’t even talked about it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Must’ve been some kiss, then.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia, I’m serious!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, okay. How did this one kiss change so much?”</span>
</p><p><span>“Well, it was...</span><em><span>different.</span></em><span>”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Yeah, I gathered that much for myself, thanks. What made it different?”</span></p><p>
  <span>“I mean, after we...kissed, for the first time, we didn’t exactly discuss it, right? And so then, it was just sort of...easy. It was...really nice, but it was one of those things where there was a certain line that hadn’t been crossed--a line that I didn’t even know was there until he crossed it and it just...confused the hell out of me. Like--like…” Cas stuttered, choking on her fears and hopes. “You don’t kiss somebody like that---if you don’t….feel </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not the point!” </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Avoiding the question, I see.</span>
  </em>
  <span> “The point is that I...I was sure </span>
  <em>
    <span>he didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> and now…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now you’re not sure?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly! And now, once and a while, he decides to go out on a fucking limb and kiss me like that again...I can’t handle that without knowing. For sure.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kiss you like what again?” Ophelia inquired softly. The confused tension in Cas’s face melted away, quickly being replaced by soft uncertainty and melancholy questions.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like he...like </span>
  <em>
    <span>he--”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas let the sentence die, but Ophelia got the meaning all the same. “I think he</span>
  <em>
    <span> almost </span>
  </em>
  <span>said it too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you ready for that?”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She huffed. “No! Maybe, yes, I’m not sure! But I’m just...</span>
  <em>
    <span>not sure.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas.” Ophelia held her best friend’s gaze with the magnet in her eyes. “Let it happen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? But I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas. You’ve waited this long, and hell, you finally made it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tried to ignore that small twinge of envy in her gut as she thought of Cas and Scorpius kissing, so comfortable and </span>
  <em>
    <span>at home</span>
  </em>
  <span> in each other's arms. “And you...out of all this shit, you got something</span>
  <em>
    <span> good</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and for once, just try to let it go where it’s trying to take you for once. I’m here for you, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>it’ll be okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You mean that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Every word.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sharing a smile that said every silent word left in the air, Cas, and Ophelia jumped (rather uncomfortably on her part) as their number was called a few seconds later. Toting the brown paper bags of food under their arms and linking their free ones, Cas and Ophelia traveled back down the cobblestone and then dirt roads, all the way through the biting cold and back to their tent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Walking into the warmer atmosphere, the girls lay their bags to rest on the table. “We’re back, losers!” Cas called, attracting Al, Teddy, and Scorpius into the room. The boys took one sniff of the delicious food and dug in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The meal was full of laughter and smiles, sauce all over faces, and thrown french fries as they filled the tent with an abundance of happiness. Moments like this had been few and far between lately, so Ophelia knew that any and all five would jump at it any chance they got.  She couldn’t help but grin even wider after seeing everyone smile like this, even if it was clear the Scorpius clearly had things to say to Cas that neither of them would be sharing with the class. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As predicted, as soon as the last bits of their favorite dishes were gone, Scorpius nudged Cas, leaning into her a bit and whispering something to her. Ophelia was the only one close enough to hear: “You sure you’re alright? How’d it go?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She found them sickeningly adorable.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia could see Cas’s blush even in the slightly dim light. “Yeah, definitely. I’m great.” She could almost see the memories of their previous conversations floating through Cas’s mind. Slowly, as if they were both afraid of moving one inch too much would uncover their not-so-secret secret. Eventually, though, they drifted into the other room together, and she and Al pretended not to notice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy, however, seemed to be completely oblivious, because instead of watching them go he was staring...right at her? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” he said quietly as soon as she noticed him, “Can we talk? For a second?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia could feel her eyebrows rise, but nodded anyway. “Y-yeah. Of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He beckoned her with his eyes, nudging his head toward the outside. She followed him soon after, stepping out into the cold but not missing Al’s, “Sure! Y’all just...go. I’ll be here….uh, listening to the radio, I guess.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Turning to face Teddy as they reached the preliminary line of trees, Ophelia offered him a confused smile. “What’s up?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shuffled a bit, twisting his fingers together. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taking a page out of Malfoy’s book, huh? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, Ophelia almost felt like laughing. “Yeah, Teddy. I’m fine. Are you okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, he actually did laugh. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Am I okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Why </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> I be okay? </span>
  <em>
    <span>You’re </span>
  </em>
  <span>the one who--” he struggled for the right words. “Who almost bled out!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia looked down, breaking their gaze without meaning to. “Yeah. Guess so.” Her hand subconsciously shifted down to her thigh, her fingers tracing the small ridge her bandages created under her jeans. She couldn’t help herself from picking at the edge, letting her nails bend awkwardly, and not caring at the slight bit of pain coursing through her hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Hey</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Teddy took a step closer, one foot crunching through the fallen leaves. “Seriously. It’s alright, Phe--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>not!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She was almost more mad at herself for getting worked up the second time that day than getting involved in the actual situation. “It’s not, because it </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> should’ve happened, because I---I never should’ve screwed up. It </span>
  <em>
    <span>wasn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>supposed to happen like that, I mean...I know I’ve never taken the test, and you have, so I guess it makes sense, but neither have Cas or Al</span>
  <em>
    <span> or</span>
  </em>
  <span> Scorpius and they didn’t end up causing an outright panic and wasting a week of our</span>
  <em>
    <span> very valuable</span>
  </em>
  <span> time because they couldn’t do anything, or--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m telling you,</span>
  </em>
  <span> none of us blame you. You didn’t do </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything </span>
  </em>
  <span>wrong, you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, except...except stuff like that</span>
  <em>
    <span> isn’t supposed to happen to me!</span>
  </em>
  <span> W-which isn’t to say I’m perfect because I’ve made it </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> obvious that I’m not, but I thought at least I should be able to do</span>
  <em>
    <span> this</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I’ve always been able to--I’ve worked </span>
  <em>
    <span>so hard</span>
  </em>
  <span> and I can’t...we can’t afford to lose this much time, screw this up as bad, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>just--</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Phe.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Teddy reached out, placing his hand quickly on top of Ophelia’s. She hadn’t even known she’d still been picking at her bandage until Teddy had stopped her, taking her hand in his and essentially forcing her to meet his eyes. “You’re allowed to make mistakes. You don’t have to have all the answers all the time--</span>
  <em>
    <span>the rest of us sure as hell don’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Let</span>
  <em>
    <span> us</span>
  </em>
  <span> take care of </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> for once.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just...</span>
  <em>
    <span>hate</span>
  </em>
  <span> being helpless.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. But, Phelia--” </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She met his eyes again. “Yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re anything but helpless.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>They stood there in warm silence staring but not saying until the cold became too cold and the silence put a bit too much space between them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re still holding my hand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He didn’t let go.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guys!” Al called from the tent, causing both of them to swivel around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You need to see this--well, hear this. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Come on!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” The urgency in his voice drove Ophelia past her surprise, happiness, guilt, and confusion and into the tent, essentially dragging Teddy behind her. They came to a halted stop in the main room, Ophelia bumping into Cas’s back and causing her to bump into Scorpius. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Listen!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Al implored as if their life depended on it. The other four sat down on various items of furniture. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the </span>
  <em>
    <span>hell</span>
  </em>
  <span> is it, Al?” Scorpius asked, his voice framed with apprehension. “Is something wrong?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not even giving an answer, Al shushed him and stared intently at the radio.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked like he’d seen a ghost.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia waited for the worst; every possible negative situation passing through her mind. She imagined Hogwarts, her mom and dad, her brothers, her friends, their friends, her </span>
  <em>
    <span>home. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She gripped Teddy’s hand a </span>
  <em>
    <span>little</span>
  </em>
  <span> tighter. She watched Al tense up and Scorpius slowly lean a </span>
  <em>
    <span>bit </span>
  </em>
  <span>closer to Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What had happened?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, something that hadn’t even occurred to Ophelia happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A </span>
  <em>
    <span>very familiar voice </span>
  </em>
  <span>crackled through the battered radio’s speaker.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, hello hello </span>
  <em>
    <span>hello</span>
  </em>
  <span> ladies and gentlemen!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia had never been more certain of something in her life. That was Milo </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking </span>
  </em>
  <span>Chance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She saw Cas’s eyes flick to the speaker, almost as if she could see her close friend’s face there. What the hell was this bastard doing on the radio?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A scuffle could be heard near whatever source of sound amplification they were using, and then Milo returned. “Well, as </span>
  <em>
    <span>smartass </span>
  </em>
  <span>here would like to add, we </span>
  <em>
    <span>technically </span>
  </em>
  <span>don’t know if anyone is listening in, so we </span>
  <em>
    <span>technically </span>
  </em>
  <span>have no one to address, but it’s the thought that counts.” He took a pause. Ophelia could just about see his crooked smirk. “My only hope is that my dumbass of a best friend took my subtle hints and remembered to pack that radio. I’m sure that at least one person in that group is smart enough to find this radio station, so, if the five of you are listening in right now, hey fuckers! Hope your little quest is going well.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas looked to be about on the verge of tears. Ophelia herself almost began to cry, imagining her spunky teammate having a hay day with this radio show, just for them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve decided to dub this radio show Weasel Watch, in honor of my favorite feisty redhead, and because...well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I like alliterations.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A watery smile painted Cas’s face. Everyone in the room wasn’t really there at that moment. They were all there, sitting next to Milo, laughing with him, being </span>
  <em>
    <span>home. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, another scuffle seemed to overwhelm the intercom. After a few seconds of quiet static and signs of movement, Milo returned for a second time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As I’ve been forced to tell you--I mean, </span>
  <em>
    <span>reminded to say</span>
  </em>
  <span>, is that as much as I will be taking credit for the idea, I’m not doing this alone.” A small shuffle, and then. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi everyone! Uh, I’m...Jonah. Jonah Peters. But I guess the people who’re listening right now already know that, so...I miss you guys. Hope you’re doing okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia almost felt like choking. Her other half on the pitch. Even as the tears rolled down her face, she smiled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al seemed to have lost sentient thought. Ophelia could feel the longing radiating off of him, paired with something like regret and a side of I miss you.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t worry, Al. Your boy’s waiting. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep, folks!” Milo cheered. “My partner in crime. Now, before any of them try to hex me into next week, why don’t I introduce everyone else?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everyone else?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The Weasel Watch faculty also includes, Fred and Roxanne Weasley, James Potter, and Ian Kent. They send their best wishes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everyone in the room was completely silent. There weren’t any words exchanged; there was nothing to say. The five of them just needed to take a few moments to appreciate this. Their family had given them the most priceless gift; they’d brought the </span>
  <em>
    <span>home</span>
  </em>
  <span> back to</span>
  <em>
    <span> them. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, yeah, it’s a lot to take in. We are pretty awesome but save your tears. We’re here for you, and you can tune in, well...whenever! Weasel Watch definitely isn’t going anywhere. And now,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A bit of an uncomfortable scratch ensued, screeching out of the speaker and making them all wince. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Now,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Milo echoed with a heavy exhale. “For the start of the music portion to our radio show.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I had an amazing idea--and, uh, everyone agreed, that dancing into danger was much more fun than walking, so. Here y’all go. Enjoy!” Milo’s comforting voice faded out, slowly being replaced by the opening measures of a very familiar song.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jessie is a friend, yeah</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I know he’s been a good friend of mine</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The song wrapped around Ophelia like a warm hug, it’s chords drying her tears and it’s lyrics widening the smile already on her face. As unbreakable as ever, Cas jumped up without missing a beat. Immediately cranking the volume dial higher, Cas began to jump and twist with the music as it filled the room. All her worries and cares seemed to evaporate as she danced, looking completely utterly in her element.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius watched her with intent and the warmest kind of want.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The </span>
  <em>
    <span>loving </span>
  </em>
  <span>kind. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>But lately, something’s changed, that ain’t hard to define</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jessie’s got himself a girl and I want to make her mine</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Al nudged the blond with his shoulder. “Go on. Go dance with her</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius blushed. “Nah, I-I couldn’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure you can. C’mon.” Al grabbed Scorpius by both hands and dragged him to stand, begin to pull and groove with him in that familiar, comfortable way. Slowly, the green-eyed boy pushed him toward Cas, eventually forcing Scorpius to take part in the dancing. Soon, he and Cas were in rhythm, smiling and laughing with each other as the music continued. Al danced not far away, swaying from side to side without a care in the world. Ophelia bopped her head to the beat, tapping her fingers to the time of the song and pushing away any envy she might have felt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy stood from his spot and sauntered over. Holding out an overdramatic hand, he wiggled his eyebrows. “May I have this dance?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia looked from her thigh to Teddy, her hands to Teddy, the radio, and back to Teddy. “You know I can’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, you just think you can’t. C’mere,” He pulled her softly by the hand into his chest, making room for her to lean on him as they swayed softly with the song.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah, an’ he’s holding her in his arms, late late at night</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You know I wish that I had Jessie’s girl</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks, Teddy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything for you, Phe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was surprised at how whole she felt. This was a situation she may or may not have imagined a few times, in varying capacity. Of course, she hadn’t been in the middle of trying to save the world then. Still, she’d always imagined she’d be nervous, hyper-focused, not this comfortable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As they swayed around in circles, Ophelia caught Cas’s eye and </span>
  <em>
    <span>smiled.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She smiled to herself, too,</span>
  <em>
    <span> thinking.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Home really isn’t a place, is it?</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You know I wish that I had Jessie’s girl...</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Chapter 23</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Teddy!” Teddy’s head snapped up from tying his shoes, “Teddy, are you ready? Let’s go! We’re freezing our asses off out here waiting for you!” He glanced in the mirror, quickly carding his hands through his bright hair and adjusting his sweatshirt and jean jacket. Grinning as he jogged out of the tent, he laughed when he saw Cas doing jumping jacks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aw, come on Mini Weasley, it’s not </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> cold.” He teased as he casually put his hands in his pockets because, in fact, it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> cold. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You</span>
  </em>
  <span> were also not waiting for an eternity for a specific Teddy Lupin to tie his goddamn shoes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So dramatic,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> He grumbled and got a gloved backhand to the side of his head, the rest of their group just watched in amusement, until Ophelia half limped in between them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, yes, we get it. It’s cold and Teddy’s slow, now actually let’s get going, we have spying to do.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al sighed, “For the last time, we’re not </span>
  <em>
    <span>spying</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” He tugged at the beanie covering his dark hair, “We’re just watching the town and exploring the murders and stuff to see what the Horcrux is going to manifest as. So we have a heads up as to what we’re fighting.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius patted Al’s head good-naturedly, “Love ya, Al, but you </span>
  <em>
    <span>literally</span>
  </em>
  <span> just described spying.” Cas and Ophelia laughed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He sighed looking at the ground, “Yeah, I know.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy laughed, loving every moment he spends with his group, like this, like they were a family. And in a way they were, they were all he had, whether they liked it or not, lucky for him, Teddy was pretty sure they did. He glanced at Ophelia, feeling his heart flip, he remembered when that scared him, now he leaned into the uncomfortable weight she put in his chest. It reminded him how much he liked her, how much she mattered to him, how he would never stop working to make sure she knew it too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas wrapped her puffy jacket around herself tighter, huffing out a mouthful of air, “We all good?” Scorpius nodded, Cas offered him a soft smile...</span>
  <em>
    <span>how interesting</span>
  </em>
  <span>, “Then let’s go.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy fell into step next to Al, “What do you think it’s gonna be?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you think the Horcrux is gonna manifest as? My bet is for a sharknado.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas, Ophelia, and Scorpius whipped around from whatever pre-existing conversation they had been in, “What the hell is a </span>
  <em>
    <span>sharknado</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Scorpius asked, a mischievous grin playing at his lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“L-Like a tornado, but with sharks flying around in it.” He ignored the light pride he felt in his chest when he made Ophelia laugh, it was the </span>
  <em>
    <span>best</span>
  </em>
  <span> feeling in the world.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re absolutely ridiculous, Lupin.” Cas voiced, sharing a look with Ophelia and trying to hide her grin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He laughed, he knew he should have been terrified. Their future was being decided by some sort of dead goo that wanted to bring the most dangerous wizard in history back from the dead, yet all he could do was smile as he looked around the quaint town they walked through. He could only grin when Al snuck up behind Scorpius, scaring him silly, as they perched themselves on a hill that overlooked the town. He knew their whole world was at risk, but how could he worry about it when Ophelia’s laugh was so beautiful? How could he be paralyzed with fear when Al and Scorpius were the best friends he had ever had? When he knew he would never be alone because if anything ever happened they would have to pry Cas away from him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, everything was at risk, but he could forget that when he was surrounded by his family. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He breathed deeply as they settled into the hill. Teddy took in the small town, it looked like it was straight out of a storybook. Something a child might imagine as their parents read them a book before bed. The five of them took in the view, talking over what houses they would live in and complaining about the cold, he couldn’t tear his eyes away from Scorpius when Cas shivered and he slowly scooted closer to her, as if that little bit of contact between their shoulders would warm her up. </span>
</p><p><span>It was those little things that had Teddy wondering if there was something going on between them, </span><em><span>and</span></em> <em><span>then</span></em><span> he saw Ophelia and Al share this look of all-knowing. Of course, something was going on between them, Teddy almost felt like laughing, they were terrible at hiding it. </span></p><p>
  <span>That explained all their quick little looks, and small smiles and--</span>
</p><p>
  <span> Ew. Every time they slipped into another room...</span>
  <em>
    <span>alone</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Teddy almost gagged--</span>
  <em>
    <span>ew.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But also, </span>
  <em>
    <span>good for them</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he looked at the way Scorpius was watching Cas, </span>
  <em>
    <span>good for Scorpius</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he was slightly confused at the twinge of envy he felt when he glanced over at Ophelia. Her dark hair swirled around her face, the blue eyes he loved watching pierced through the cold air from behind her glasses, her cheeks were flushed from the whip of the wind. She was totally and completely Ophelia, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>totally</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>completely</span>
  </em>
  <span> not his. There was no point in feeling the way he did. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Cas and Scorpius could get out of their weird I'm-about-to-kill-you phase before Teddy could work up the nerve to tell Ophelia how he felt, was there even a point? </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop, you can’t compare yourself to them. You’ll be fine</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was just it, Teddy didn’t want to be fine, he wanted Ophelia. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was pulled out of his semi troubling thoughts by a ripple of exclamation that waved through their small group, when he looked over he saw Cas and Ophelia pointing at something. When Teddy’s gaze followed their fingers he understood the excitement, smoke was pouring out of three houses in a row. Straight down the street a mass of billowing smoke wrapped around the immediate neighborhood, Teddy cringed when he heard a few stray screams. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well…” Teddy broke the paralyzed silence, “guess it’s not a sharknado.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al buried his head in Scorpius’ shoulder, “Can we go, I don’t wanna have to watch this,” Teddy saw a shiver run through his whole body, Scorpius dutifully held his best friend, “or listen…” Cas and Ophelia were linked by their arms, physically drawing on each other’s strength. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yeah, of course,” Cas whispered, afraid to break the quiet revere of fear and anticipation that had settled over the five of them. As if talking to loud would finally break the last of their resolve, and they were all already </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> cracked. They crunched through fallen leaves in that heavy silence all the way back to the tent. Teddy could feel his friends worry, almost hear their thoughts and prayers. It was all so much more real now that they knew what they were up against. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Last year was goop, now they faced smoke. Smoke could be everywhere and nowhere all at once. What would they have to give up to come out on top? It was terrifying, Teddy’s pulse pounded in his ears, they’d all been fighting so hard and their journey was just beginning. </span>
</p><p><span>&lt;&gt;</span><span><br/></span> <span>A warm light shined on Teddy’s face, he was swaddled in a furry blanket, his face tingled under the warmth of two somewhat familiar gazes. Above, two sets of large hands caressed his face, soft and gentle. Low voices hummed all around him, buzzing around his head, his heart bubbled with simple happiness. A woman’s voice, sweet and quiet, whispered his name, it curled around his ear, tickling the few memories from his youth he had. He laughed, another voice intertwined with hers, low and scratchy but the most comforting sound nonetheless. </span></p><p>
  <span>Then all of it was gone. Green glowing goo crawled it’s way up the legs of his crib, threatening to drown him, he was surrounded, the soft voices were replaced with the sound of screams. </span>
  <em>
    <span>His friend’s screams.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He heard Al cry out in pain, flashes of him crumpled on the ground arose. Cas’ whimper of fear echoed around his brain as images of her, knee-deep in Nagini, made his heart race faster. He tried to get away, move anywhere to get away from the uncomfortably familiar goo, the familiar weight of anxiety settled into his chest as he remembered the burn of its acidic contents. He struggled against the blanket, all traces of comfort gone, now it was a prison. Something keeping him from surviving. He cried out, looking for those soft voices, that simple happiness, the sound of people who loved him had brought. Looking for anything to let him know he wasn’t alone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It never came. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy’s eyes snapped open. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Immediately he scrambled out of bed, wanting desperately to get away from the blankets, the chains that had held him hostage. Somewhere between crying and screaming Teddy slowly took in their room. Scorpius was rolled over on his back, his breathing was slow and steady, Al was in the bed next to him curled in a small ball and sleeping softly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lucky. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two beds on the end were empty, Ophelia and Cas must still be up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He contemplated going back to bed. Getting the much-needed sleep his body so desperately wanted, then the forever lonely feeling that dream had brought upon him slowly came creeping back. He shook his head, as if a physical movement could shake the feeling that the hole in his heart would never be filled, and headed towards the light and the hushed voices of Cas and Ophelia. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stalled just outside of the mouth of the study, taking a moment to gather his thoughts.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What am I even doing? Am I really going to bother them with this? Do I even want to bother them with this? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He leaned behind the threshold, just out of view. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas was curled up in a blanket, peeps of her bright hair poked out from under a beanie, her eyes scanned a map spread out over her lap. He smiled, he liked the way her freckles looked in the candlelight, it was so strange to think about, last year he had barely known his cousin. Now, she was one of his best friends. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes, leaning her head on the back of the couch. She was seated in the middle of the floor surrounded by books and spells and stray basilisk fangs they must have been studying. She looked unfairly comfortable in her sweatshirt, but Teddy didn’t miss the tense set of her shoulders, how her messy bun was so adorably messy because she probably hadn’t been able to keep her hands from tugging at it in frustration. His heart dropped at the bright redness of her lips, she looked </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> tired. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy knew the feeling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Being insanely tired but unable to rest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somebody cleared their throat behind him. Teddy whipped around, subconsciously looking for his wand only to find his pajama pants and a ruffled Scorpius Malfoy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you okay?” The sincere concern in his voice took Teddy by surprise. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yeah,” Teddy looked to the ground, the wound of his nightmare still fresh. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, I heard you tossing and turning, I just wanted to make sure.” As horrified as Teddy was about being caught, he could help but smile at the boy in front of him, Sunshine was back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are you doing?” Scorpius had very clearly just rolled out of bed, his hair stood up and his crew neck jumper was wrinkled and crooked with sleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy grinned, trying to keep his cool, </span>
  <em>
    <span>stay cool, Lupin</span>
  </em>
  <span>, “What are </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> doing, Sunshine, my darling?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned a rather interesting shade of pink, “Oh, y’know--just…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Just</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Scorpius shuffled his feet, at a loss for words apparently, Teddy saw his gaze shift to Cas, </span>
  <em>
    <span>oh</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Teddy wiggled his eyebrows at Scorpius. “Oh, how far you’ve come, Sunshine.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He ran his hands through his hair uncomfortably, “Ha, not really.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever could you mean? I thought your top-secret, not so secret, little </span>
  <em>
    <span>relationship</span>
  </em>
  <span> with Mini Weasley was going splendidly.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius rolled his eyes but smiled nonetheless, Teddy didn’t miss the side of sadness it held. “We just--I dunno, we just kiss? </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ew.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s it.” He said it like Teddy was supposed to know what it meant, it was clear Scorpius had thought about it a lot. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s it?” Teddy pressed, “I’m confused.”   </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius laughed harshly, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Me too</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” He sighed, “I just--I just </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> like her, Teddy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ok, and?” Teddy almost laughed, as if all of them didn’t know that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And, I mean, how am I supposed to know if it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>more</span>
  </em>
  <span> than just a kiss to her?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius trailed off, pressing a finger to his lips as Ophelia and Cas’ conversation floated towards them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas had sat up, the map forgotten  on the opposite side of the couch, “Have you ever thought about how actually insane all of this is?” Teddy could tell she was trying to stay playful, but by the way, Scorpius tensed up next to him and how her voice shook with stress, he knew it was a feeble attempt. Ophelia set down the book she was reading, looking up at her best friend with a look of such intense understanding Teddy almost felt like he shouldn’t be watching. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> he shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but the way they looked at each other made him </span>
  <em>
    <span>almost</span>
  </em>
  <span> feel guilty for it, curiosity prevailed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia looked down at her bandaged leg, cringing slightly at whatever memory was running around her mind, “Yeah, Cas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean--” Cas looked down, they both shivered collectively, their shared trauma shining through, “It’s just </span>
  <em>
    <span>so hard</span>
  </em>
  <span> to not be </span>
  <em>
    <span>scared</span>
  </em>
  <span> all the time, I just--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia moved to sit by her, supporting her while sharing her pain, just what Ophelia did best. What Ophelia loved doing. Why Teddy loved--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just don’t want to lose them.” She fingered the edge of her hair, “I don’t want to lose…” She trailed off, getting lost in her thoughts. Ophelia’s face was a picture of thousands of emotions, and all Teddy wanted to do was sit with her and make every single brushstroke of pain go away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas,” Ophelia’s voice was firm and caring, “I think you should probably go to bed, you’ve had an insanely long day.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius let out a long breath, Teddy had almost forgotten he was there in the midst of his spying. He started to step forward, Teddy reached out to grab his wrist, he turned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry,” Scorpius grinned sadly, “I won’t blow your cover.” Tedy watched as Scorpius stepped out into the light, Ophelia looked like he had just saved the day when Cas immediately gravitated towards him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s when Teddy started to understand just how complex their friendship was. Ophelia and Cas were both able to see that they were each other’s best friend, that they were always going to need the other and they would always be there. But always able to see what was best, and right now, Ophelia knew Cas needed Scorpius, Ophelia made sure Cas got what she needed. Teddy found it amazing, he had never really had a best friend until now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She ushered the redhead into his arms, Teddy smiled involuntarily at the relief that flooded Scorpius’ face when Cas allowed him to circle her in his arms, slowly leading her towards the bedroom. Promising an exhausted Ophelia that he’d make sure she got to bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Come on, Lupin, this is your cue. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He considered turning back to bed, just forgetting the pain that Ophelia was clearly feeling, but then he heard her sigh and he watched her shoulders sink. There was no decision to be made, he had his answer all along, he walked into the room and slowly sat next to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Loudmouth?” He couldn’t read the range of emotion that flashed across her face, she sighed, “Hi.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He grinned softly, taking in her face as an invisible hand pressed on his heart, the pressure Ophelia put in his chest slowly coming out of hiding. “Hello,” He whispered, horrified at how his voice portrayed all the pain he felt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her inquisitive eyes were back on him now, “What are you doing up?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His dream came back to him with a vengeance, the realization that the one thing every child should have was the one thing he would never get to know. Normally, Teddy managed to forget, forget that he didn’t know where he came from, all he had was glimpse and fragments of a baby’s memory, obscure stories, and promises that they were the best people to ever exist. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked down, suddenly overwhelmed with that empty loneliness, “I couldn’t sleep.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia’s gaze burned into the side of his head, concerned and calculating, “Do you wanna talk about it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy looked over at her, tears welled up in the back of his eyes making his throat feel three times smaller. “No,” He hated how broken he sounded, Ophelia smiled softly, understanding warming her features. “I just, I just don’t wanna give it any more thought, y’know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, she understood. She always understood that was just Ophelia. She was the only person who always understood, </span>
  <em>
    <span>every single time</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She smiled, Teddy didn’t think it was possible to love anything as much as he loved her smile. It was simple and small and real, no traces of the fake ones he would get flashed every time a pretty face saw him. There was nothing superficial about what was staring back at him, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Always,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She reached over and squeezed his hand before turning and handing him a book. “In that case, you mine as well help me scan this book for anything we might need.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy allowed himself to feel a shred of happiness, a shred of hope because if he knew anything it was that he would protect </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> at all costs. He knew that if he had control over anything it was that he would work every day to make sure that smile came back to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I should have known I was walking into a trap,” He sighed dramatically, flipping to a random page and pretending to read as they fell into silence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Five minutes in and Teddy thought he was doing a great job at pretending to read. He wasn’t fidgeting (which always seemed to give him away during tutoring sessions) he didn’t even try to make jokes to distract from the fact that he was reading (which were only sometimes successful) he even managed to stay away from the table contents, (which for some reason never helped him grasp how much more he had to read and </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span> gave him away.) </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So when Ophelia sighed and turned to him, he was genuinely shocked. “Loudmouth,” She closed her book, “You haven’t turned a page within the last five minutes, even </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> aren’t that slow of a reader.” Before Teddy could protest she was on her feet, she rustled around in the main room before coming back with a radio in her hands. She set it down on the side table next to the couch, flipping through the channels until a kind of familiar song came on. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Wise men say...</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>A low, vintage sounding, voice crackled from the box, Ophelia swayed with the music as she slowly turned to face him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My dad used to play this song all the time,” Teddy watched in awe as she clearly retreated back into her memories, “He would put it on this huge, </span>
  <em>
    <span>blue</span>
  </em>
  <span>, record player and we would dance. That was really the only time we got to talk,” She tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear, “That was really the only time we got along. He’d put this on and walk up to me and say: </span>
  <em>
    <span>mine as well</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And he would say it as if he didn’t know I would drop everything to dance with him, every time, because that was the only time he didn’t care about my grades or my brothers, it was just him and me.” She smiled sadly, wrapping her arms around herself and swaying as she mouthed the lyrics. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Like a river flows, surely to the sea...</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy gathered all of his courage and moved towards her, he held out his hand, silencing the flood of thoughts drowning his head. She took it, a tentative smile starting to spread across her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take my hand</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mine as well.” Ophelia laughed, Teddy pulled her into his chest as her hand found his shoulder. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take my whole life too</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re ridiculous, Lupin.” She whispered, laying her head in the crook of his neck as they swayed to the steady beat of the song. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just two terrified teenagers holding on to the only thing that made any sense. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy just smiled into the top of her head, letting the tingling sensation of perfection overtake his body, his mind, the worry he had felt. He let the feeling of being here, with Ophelia Lovegood humming softly into his chest, slow dancing at two in the morning as the world crumbled around them scare the fear away. At least for right now, everything was perfect. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>For I can't help falling in love with you...</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Chapter 24</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Scorpius glanced at Al’s watch for the millionth time, inwardly groaning as he registered that neither of the hands had moved much since the last time he’d checked. He, Al, Teddy, and Ophelia were currently pouring over a large, leather-bound volume that was somehow going to help them defeat...smoke? A Horcrux? At this point Scorpius only knew that whatever it was couldn’t be good,</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And this wouldn’t be easy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” Ophelia sighed resignedly. “Okay, so what do we know so far?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh,” Al jumped in, “If we use this spell along with the basilisk venom, we can inject it directly into the Horcrux to make sure it affects it from the inside out. That way, we can actually kill it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right.” Ophelia pulled her hair back quickly, spreading her hands over the yellow pages. “So, Cas and I will enter first--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Woah Woah Woah,</span>
  </em>
  <span> I’m not sure how I feel about that idea.” Teddy interrupted, sending an unreadable look in Phelia’s direction.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Truth be told, Scorpius didn’t like it much either. The idea of the two of them going in alone, of Cas, going in alone...it made his stomach drop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Phelia sighed again, turning to the blue-haired boy. “You three are going to be right behind us. We’ll be okay.” She held his gaze a bit longer before continuing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius desperately hoped that was true. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anyway, there’s a point to that. We deliver the initial hits, then you two circle around the back and take it by surprise. If it doesn’t know how many of us are there, it’ll never be able to take all five of us at once. It shouldn’t even take too many repetitions before the venom is too much for it to handle.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It all sounded so easy...in </span>
  <em>
    <span>theory.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He hated how confident he felt right now, how unafraid. How normal this felt, and how easily it could all be taken away. The closer and closer it became to the moment of reckoning, the colder air seemed..the cloudier the sky, the darker the nights, the deeper the hole in the pit of his stomach.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay then,” Teddy agreed cautiously. “Sounds great.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At that moment, a deep bang sounded from across the room. The door was kicked open by an unseen intruder...but sooner rather than later, Cas’s smiling face was coming into view along with the rest of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She grinned widely at the four of them as she gestured dramatically to her outfit; which, Scorpius had to admit, was worth the grand gesture. She was dressed simply, dark blue jeans and an olive green long sleeve, fuzzy socks peeking out from the tops of her boots. It was just so very Cas that it gave Scorpius pause. The green of her shirt made her eyes seem even more piercing, somehow--he really could stare into them for hours. Her freckles seemed to jump off of her skin, mesmerizing Scorpius until he was absolutely positive that a view like the Grand Canyon would be pitiful compared to this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m ready!” She announced, gesturing once again to her ensemble. “What do you think?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas,” Ophelia laughed, smiling in exasperation at her best friend. “You wear that every day.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas pouted, sticking her lower lip out in exaggeration and sending Scorpius’s heart off a cliff. “Not this specifically.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia grinned again. “I was just telling the boys about the plan you and I came up with. Who does what, y’know, that kind of thing.” The goofy smile faded from Cas’s face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am...no longer ready. I’m gonna go...do that. Get ready. Brush my hair, yeah, that.” Cas shrugged awkwardly, running a hand through her clearly already brushed hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas!” Ophelia groaned. “Come on. You’re not getting out of this one.” Cas grumbled all the way to the couch, slumping down beside Ophelia and staring determinedly at the book.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine.”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius swallowed heavily, trying very hard not to look at Cas. He couldn’t get the image of her pouting face out of his mind…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. No, </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>, now was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> the time to be thinking about Cas’s lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They read and re-read the spell for hours until the sun was low in the sky. Scorpius had torn a small hole in his jeans to almost twice it’s size in boredom. He’d been staring at the same paragraph for so long the words didn’t even look like English anymore. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It didn’t help that he hadn’t really been focusing on them in the first place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In his mind, he was mentally punching a wall. What had she done to him? And why was he so eager to let it keep happening?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why couldn’t he tell her? Not just like how it was now, no, like really and truly tell her. He was sure she knew there was something, how couldn’t there be? They were both in that room every single time they kissed, both in each other’s arms...so why did she feel so far away?</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Because,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he thought, </span>
  <em>
    <span>this isn’t really what you want.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, it had been a big step forward. It had taken a lot of fixing, a lot of forgiving, and Scorpius was so damn grateful. Every day, he thanked her silently for letting him back into her heart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, maybe heart wasn’t</span>
  <em>
    <span> truly</span>
  </em>
  <span> the right word.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He still had no idea how she really felt. He’d gotten a glimpse of it, last year before he’d ruined everything, he knew there was something. But he couldn’t be sure, he couldn’t let himself hope that it was more than that. More than just a way to cope, more than just kissing, more than just the shallow end of attraction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because Scorpius...Scorpius felt more than that. It wasn’t just her freckles, or her gorgeous eyes, and her bottomless heart. It wasn’t just her silky hair, her adorable nose, her lips, no...not like it might be to her, with him. It was so much more than looks, even more than how she treated the world. It was how </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span> saw </span>
  <em>
    <span>her. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>At the beginning of the last year, when he’d known Cas for a bit and had just gotten past the obvious choice of hate, Scorpius had always seen her as something unattainable. He was lucky he got to be around her at all; hate was easy, and hate was constant, so at least he knew she wasn’t going anyway. After he got to know her for a bit, he told himself he was content with friendship. It was better than always being at odds, he could work with that...but then he ruined it. As quickly as it’d evolved, Scorpius rocketed the relationship back to hatred. He had to admit it was easier...but it was more painful. Living a whole life pretending was something he couldn’t imagine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then a few weeks ago in that train car...Scorpius had made himself swear that kissing was enough. He’d gotten this far, and these were the cards she’d dealt him, but he needed more. He’d realized lately that nothing would ever be enough until Cas at least knew how he truly felt. If she didn’t feel the same, if he scared her away somehow, he...well, Scorpius didn’t have any idea what he’d do, but he’d figure it out if that meant that he at least had a </span>
  <em>
    <span>chance.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>A chance at loving and being loved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius had fallen into the deep end of love.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damn, love was </span>
  <em>
    <span>exhausting.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, he couldn’t deny the thrill of the chase was exhilarating. Something about being able to have her so close to him, whenever he wanted...that was something he didn’t ever want to change. It wasn’t where he wanted them to be, not by a longshot, but until Cas was ready to hear that and until he got the guts to say it, it would have to work.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And shit, was it working.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius stood, suddenly, meeting her eyes for a quick second before forcing himself to look away, toward the other room. “I’m...gonna go get water. Or a snack, or...something.” He turned to Al and Teddy, to corroborate that his pitiful excuse would work. “Anything to get away from you weirdos and your book obsession.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He really hoped she’d caught on to what he was trying to accomplish.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Five or so minutes later, after Scorpius had successfully chugged a glass of water and made sure that his spot in the kitchen could not be spotted by prying eyes, he wasn’t disappointed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas spun into the room, yelling a comment in response to whatever the others had said. Once she too was out of sight and earshot, the redhead turned to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re such a bad influence.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He let the customary smirk fall into place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that so?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” she breathed, some of the volume leaving her voice to be replaced with air, “And a distraction, too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He cocked an eyebrow and stepped closer. “Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Definitely. I’d get so much work done around here if it wasn’t for you.” she too took a step forward, pointedly meeting his gaze. Her eyes glistened in the dim light, bright enough that they might catch fire at any moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even without the flames, Scorpius felt as if he might just burn alive. “You didn’t seem to be very concentrated on getting work done just a little while ago.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that’s because no one took the time to appreciate my outfit today.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He smiled. A real, genuine smile. “You do look good, I must say.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Must you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mhmm,” was the only reply he could muster, closing almost all of the space between them with a few more steps.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, I must say that for such a slacker, you’re not being very distracting.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh-uh. You’re kinda failing at the not-doing-my-job job.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seriously?” His eyes never left hers, not once. Scorpius wasn’t quite sure if he’d ever be able to look at anything else again. “Would you like to file a complaint?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Certainly. I have a...few </span>
  <em>
    <span>suggestions.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She finally returned his smile. “I mean,” she all but whispered, closing the final foot of space between them and running a hand up Scorpius’s arms.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shivered against her touch. “...You mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For starters, I think it wouldn’t hurt to do a little more of </span>
  <em>
    <span>this.”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Finally, Cas crashed her lips to his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius grinning into the kiss briefly, putting all of his focus into matching her pace, their lips locking in some type of dance, the steps never spoken. The hand that had been on his arm floated into his hair, finding hold and tugging. He groaned as her free hand found the spot where his neck became his shoulder, resting there and tensing then relaxing every now and then. Both of Scorpius’s arms wrapped tightly around Cas’s waist, pulling her closer and keeping his grip strong, as if they might eventually fuse together and become one in infinite heat and chemistry. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She parted his lips with her tongue, finding his and pulling it onto the dance floor as well. They pushed and pulled at each other, never too hard but never losing energy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius’s fingers found the belt-loops of her jeans, tugging her toward him and allowing Cas to fall into him, her warmth meeting his and causing Scorpius to stumble back a bit. The small of his back met the counter, giving him free rein to explore this place that never felt like anything other than perfect. One of his arms traveled up her back, pulling into more of a hug and deepening the kiss, quickening the dance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was what harmony was: this was what perfection felt like, being here, with her, doing this until it could be more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe this was just coping for her, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>damn</span>
  </em>
  <span>, of all the things she could have chosen, Scorpius was glad this was it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their new position allowed Scorpius the leverage to turn them around, Cas’s back now to the counter. He let his higher arm return to its tight grip on her waist, pulling his other hand to match the position on her other side. Breaking away for a split second, Scorpius let himself get lost in the ecstasy of Cas’s smile and lifted her onto the counter. Her response, halfway between a laugh and a groan, affirmed he’d made the right decision.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Better?” Scorpius asked, unable to help himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shrugged, smirking. “I’d give you a promotion.” Pulling him by the collar, Cas dipped her head down to match the level of his lips, trailing kisses up his neck, across his jaw, softly to his nose, and then back to his lips. Scorpius sighed into the kiss as Cas’s arms wrapped around his neck, both his hands traveling to the small of her back. Her legs looped around his, ankles locking just behind his knees and pulling him even deeper into her arms.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her hands cupped his cheeks after a while, tracing circles over the soft skin of his cheeks and making the both of them laugh. He pulled her gently off the counter, back into his arms. He let them slow, brought his hands to cup her face, brushing his thumb quickly over her nose before returning it to her cheek, just the way he knew always made her smile. They leaned on each other a bit, getting lost in the bittersweet ending, both of them knowing reality couldn’t wait forever.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius knew he could find a home here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At long last, they broke apart. It was silent for a while, the only noise being Al’s laughter from the other room and the chirp of crickets outside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Neither of them moved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,” Scorpius ventured, surprised at how low and grinding his voice sounded after minutes of no use. “Still doubting my distraction skills?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas smiled softly. “There might be a follow-up call.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Looking forward to it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence that followed made Scorpius wonder. With the false confidence lent to him by adrenaline, he almost said it. Told her everything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he didn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, he noticed her cautious look toward the other room and asked: “You okay? Seriously.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She smiled again, but it wasn’t as real. “Yeah, well...okay as I can be, just...I don’t know how we’re going to do this. Every time we talk about it, it seems so simple, </span>
  <em>
    <span>so easy</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but...I know it’s not. And if it’s anything like what happened last time--I don’t know if I </span>
  <em>
    <span>can</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” his hands never left her face. “Yes, you can, Cas. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> you can. We all do, and the best part is...you don’t have to do it alone. You have every single one of us, and we’re all for you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s just...all of this is because of me, right? Leaving was my idea, so anything and everything that happens is my fault. Ophelia getting hurt was </span>
  <em>
    <span>my fault,</span>
  </em>
  <span> anything else, any</span>
  <em>
    <span>one </span>
  </em>
  <span>else, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was silent, but her eyes begged a question. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You can </span>
  </em>
  <span>do this. </span>
  <em>
    <span>We</span>
  </em>
  <span> can do this, and we will. None of that is your fault, none of it, okay? No one blames you and I, for one, know we can’t do this without you, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was moments like these, that Scorpius almost forgot their other problems. Almost forgot that on top of fixing everything with the girl he was completely, </span>
  <em>
    <span>idiotically,</span>
  </em>
  <span> in love with, they were gonna save the world.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or at least, they had to try.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Scorpius had to believe they could do this. For Cas, for himself, for all of them. Because if he didn’t, who would?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C’mon,” he smiled, “If we weren’t already being completely obvious, the others are going to start suspecting something’s up if we don’t get our asses back in there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re right.” Cas grinned. Scorpius wasn’t sure how much of it was real.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, he couldn’t help but laugh out loud. “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t think I heard you. What was that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I said you were right.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He cupped a hand to his ear. “I’m sorry?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius Malfoy, I swear to </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything holy on this earth</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I will slap you into next week.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, I’m shaking in my boots.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She raised her eyebrows. “Or hex you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now I’m actually scared. Let’s go.” He let Cas enter the room a split second early, trying to eliminate any room for suspicion from his friends.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, the three of them were all too immersed in a game of Gobstones Teddy had brought along.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were all standing, completely immersed, and the game. Ophelia crouched down to move her gobstone, easily beating Al and laughing as he got sprayed with the foul-smelling liquid. He screamed in outrage as Teddy, Ophelia, and Cas (who had immediately joined in) roared with laughter. Jogging over to Scorpius, Al groaned. “Scorpius, Ophelia’s being mean again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He held up a hand in protest. “Woah, you aren’t getting any closer to me smelling like that. Besides, you are hilariously easy to beat at Gobstones.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I quit.” Al threw his hands into the air, stealing the bottle of pumpkin juice from Teddy’s hands and taking a swig. “You guys </span>
  <em>
    <span>suck</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, yeah, you love us.” Cas cooed, grinning evilly.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Scorpius laughed to himself, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Perhaps I do.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Even his brain supposed that was old news. But still, for now, he was glad to join in the game, watch Teddy’s incredulous face as Cas beat him several times in a row, and laugh with his friends. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His family.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t going to let anything happen to them. He couldn’t. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Moments like this were too precious, made him wish they were back in the Gryffindor common room instead of here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For now though, similarly to several other things in his life, this would have to be enough. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe the journey </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> half the fun.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He smiled to himself again, an inexplicable warmth filling him.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Everyone in this room was worth the wait.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. Chapter 25</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>Today is the day. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>That was the only thought that flung itself around Cas’ head when she opened her eyes. Immediately she heard the world bustling around her, apparently, her friends had let her sleep in for once, she heard the echo of their voices throughout the tent. A wave of nerves crashed over her, </span>
  <em>
    <span>today is the day.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Today was the day they were finally going to set their elaborate plan into motion, today was the day they were going to put everything she cared about at risk, today was the day they were going to kill their first Horcrux. For real this time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was no room to fail, the world depended on it, Cas’ family depended on it, her home, her future, </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything.</span>
  </em>
  <span> She felt her chest press down on her with the added anxiety she had just formed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She knew she needed to do this, she knew she could do this, she knew her friends believed in her, she knew her--Scorpius believed in her. It would make sense that knowing that would make it easier, right? She should be able to be confident enough in herself to not bury herself deeper into this bed, wanting to hide forever. Take her friends into hiding and just never leave, let them live in ignorant bliss from this moment on, forgetting everything they had put themselves through. It </span>
  <em>
    <span>should</span>
  </em>
  <span> be enough. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her throat started to close, her heart moved faster in response to her sudden panic. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Closing her eyes she burrowed deeper into the warmth of her bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop. It’s going to be fine. You’re going to be fine. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She swung herself out of bed, desperate for a distraction. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Anything</span>
  </em>
  <span> to get away from her thoughts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was somewhere between crying out for help, not moving anymore, and just staying in bed sobbing until all of this was just a distant nightmare, and tearing everyone and everything in this goddamn tent apart with vicious insults. Yes, both reactions were completely irrational, Cas knew that, but the way her head was pounding made her feel like she was on the edge of a cliff looking down into the abyss of her emotions. How else was she supposed to deal with all of that? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pulling her hair back into a loose ponytail she dug through her trunk until she found her favorite sweater and a clean pair of jeans, as she pulled on the familiar piece of clothing she couldn’t help but think about how this was what she was going to wear to face a Horcrux. </span>
  <em>
    <span>This</span>
  </em>
  <span> might be the last thing she ever wore--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas!” Ophelia’s called from across the tent, “You up?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Unfortunately,” Cas responded in a sing-song tone that suggested playfulness and a touch of sarcasm. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ha, if only she knew.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Actually</span>
  </em>
  <span>, her common sense corrected, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ophelia probably did know. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>They all probably knew, as soon as Cas stepped into the main room she could tell every single one of them felt it too. They all knew what they were risking, and they all seemed to be individually freaking out about it while trying to put on a face of normalcy to each other. Cas was exhausted by it and she had been in the room for less than a minute. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her friends were scattered across the room, Ophelia was meticulously running over the spell in a corner, miming the wand movement she needed, her whole body buzzed with pent up nerves. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al and Teddy were fishing around the room, gathering all the medical supplies they had and piling it up. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Just in case</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Cas reassured herself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius was absorbed in a map of the town, his lithe fingers rested under his chin as his eyes scanned the paper. Cas’ stomach flipped, when he looked up, meeting her eyes with that insane electricity only Scorpius Malfoy could bring to eye contact. He made a small gesture with his head, motioning for her to come sit by him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning,” He whispered as soon as she was within earshot, “So nice of you to finally join us on this </span>
  <em>
    <span>incredible</span>
  </em>
  <span> day.” She took a moment to let herself look at him. Look beneath his flawless features, his carelessly attractive hair, beneath his attempt at acting normal. Well, as normal as Cas and Scorpius could be. The skin under his light eyes was tinged purple, the lack of sleep giving him away, the nerves shined through his slightly paler than usual color. Her heart ached, even in the midst of pain and anticipation and </span>
  <em>
    <span>fear</span>
  </em>
  <span> he was still the most beautiful person she had ever seen. His attentive gaze brought her back to the reality of his statement. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Right, words. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily her lack thereof didn’t matter because an argument had risen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying</span>
  </em>
  <span> to kill us? Cause I’m pretty sure that position has already been filled by a certain Horcrux.” Al was saying, rather harshly to Cas’ surprise, Ophelia stood with her hands up in defense looking somewhere between embarrassed and annoyed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There is </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>much wrong with what you just said.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, </span>
  <em>
    <span>enlighten</span>
  </em>
  <span> us.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Obviously I wasn’t trying to kill you, I was just practicing, it was a </span>
  <em>
    <span>misfire</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Ophelia stepped closer, “And don’t say that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al jutted his chin out defiantly, but Cas didn’t miss the tremble in his lips and clenched fists. This wasn’t him, this was the stress talking, the fear. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>What</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nobody is going to die, we’re not going to let that happen. I don’t even know why you would even say that.” Ophelia’s hair was piled on top of her head, she only did that when she was studying for finals, when she was questioning her knowledge, when she was at her worst. Cas glanced at Scorpius, asking a silent question, </span>
  <em>
    <span>how far are you going to let this go?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“It's a very real possibility, Phelia, mine as well admit it!” Al’s voice strained at the top of his sentence, Cas’ heart broke, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m so sorry, Al.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, no I </span>
  <em>
    <span>won’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> admit it, because there is no way I’m going to let that happen. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I won’t.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She looked down for a second, cracking further, before meeting Al’s intense stare with the same ferocity anyone would expect from Ophelia. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I can’t.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy shifted uncomfortably, looking very out of place between the two of them, “Guys maybe we should--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>No Teddy</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Al and Ophelia said in unison, Teddy furrowed his eyebrows before taking a few steps back, hurt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, maybe we should…” Scorpius said under his breath, looking to Cas for confirmation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Definitely</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They stood and moved between Ophelia and Al as a united front, Cas tried to ignore how amazing it felt. How it would be so easy to let herself imagine it was all real, that it was more than just a physical attraction.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, enough is enough,” Scorpius started looking towards Al. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas turned to Ophelia, “And I swear to </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> holy if you tell me </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>, you won’t have to worry about </span>
  <em>
    <span>dying</span>
  </em>
  <span> because I will hex you so hard that you go flying straight to Hogwarts.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is terrifying,” Scorpius ran a hand through his hair as he spoke, “We all know that, but it’s going to be even harder if we’re at each other’s throats.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, like you can talk,” Ophelia scoffed, they both looked at her in confusion, “Right,” She crossed her arms, “Cause you have </span>
  <em>
    <span>no experience</span>
  </em>
  <span> at “being at each other's throats,”” Cas choked, shooting an incredulous look towards Ophelia, she shrugged. Oh, they were going to have a </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> interesting conversation about this later. </span>
</p><p><span>The tent had fallen into such a quiet silence they could all hear the rustling of leaves outside. All eyes were switching from Cas and Scorpius to Ophelia periodically, looking to see who would cut who first. Finally, Teddy sighed, </span><span><br/>
</span> <span>“Oh, like we all didn’t know.” </span></p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Scorpius choked out, if this were a different situation Cas would laugh at how pink he was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You guys aren’t exactly </span>
  <em>
    <span>discreet</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Al joined in, smirking devilishly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas laughed, Scorpius whipped around to look at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What are you doing</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” He hissed, Cas just shook her head, breaking down into a fit of unbridled laughter, some might call it hysteria, but do we really want to get into details? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia giggled, the infectious disease spread throughout the tent until even Scorpius let out a reluctant chuckle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh, guess you guys aren’t as dumb as you look.” Cas stated once the laughter had died down, somehow they had all moved closer together, despite her embarrassment Cas was grateful. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You guys suck--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius glanced at her, “Well…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The group collectively mimed vomiting and expressed their disdain by punching him playfully, Cas hip-checked him so hard he stumbled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy gagged, “I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>gonna</span>
  </em>
  <span> say you guys suck at hiding it.” He shook his head, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Ew.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Al sighed, “Well, if we can get through that,” He gestured vaguely in Cas and Scorpius’s direction, “We can get through anything.” They laughed, Cas included, despite the heat of her cheeks, and her unwillingness to meet Scorpius’ gaze. Al sobered slightly, meeting Ophelia’s gaze, “And Phelia, you’re right, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be saying stuff like that, I-I’m just, it’s j-just…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phelia moved towards him, pulling him into a hug, “I get it, Al. I’m sorry for almost injecting basilisk venom into you.” Al chuckled despite himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Awww.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Teddy cooed, “Guysss, we got this.” He moved forward and inserted himself into the hug. He looked over Al’s shoulder, “Get in here you two nasty lovebirds.” Cas laughed as she was pulled into a tangle of arms and love. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were all on the edge, but at least they were there together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>&lt;&gt;</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not even the locker room before the final Quidditch game of the season could compare to the amount of emotion that infested the tent exactly an hour before they had scheduled to leave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Absolutely nothing could compare to what Cas felt at this very moment, what she could feel all around her. Ophelia and Teddy took up one side of the couch, Ophelia intensely studying their game plan, while leaning up against Teddy, like he was the only thing holding her up. Her jaw was clenched tightly, and her eyes had stopped moving across the page about three minutes ago. Cas’ stomach twisted, she looked so far away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were just waiting...and waiting...it was like watching paint dry, agonizing-anxiety-inducing paint. Al shifted his head onto her shoulder, burrowing himself deeper into the couch, and Cas’ side, his hands trembled against her. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This is torture.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Her consciousness tiptoed closer and closer to the edge of her emotional abyss. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She should say something. Reassure them, make sure they’re okay, make sure they know how much she loved them. Just in case. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just in case</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her head swam at the overwhelming emotions she was drowning in. She should break the heavy silence, or maybe Teddy would crack a joke that made them all laugh, or maybe Ophelia would present them with the facts, the facts that said they were going to be fine. O-Or </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe </span>
  </em>
  <span>Scorpius or Al will surprise them all and deliver such a pep talk that motivation would take over all of them. Giving them the strength to carry on, </span>
  <em>
    <span>to be okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It didn’t happen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, Ophelia’s head sank into her hands, shoulders collapsing as she tried to get her breathing under control. Teddy watched with a look of such pure pain Cas had to avert her eyes, turning her attention to Scorpius. His fingers absentmindedly traced the white scar on his lip, Cas had noticed him doing that more often the closer they got to actually facing the Horcrux. She tried not to think about how she was the reason it was there. Al got up to pace. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That seemed to break the tension, Teddy and Ophelia slipped off to go find something to eat, Scorpius muttered something about getting fresh air, and just like that Cas was alone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hated it. She needed the distraction of analyzing her friend's behavior, their anxiety, their fear, it let her forget her own. It let her forget how all of this was her fault. How all of this was her idea, how if anything happened--it would be </span>
  <em>
    <span>her fault</span>
  </em>
  <span>. The guilt was vast and engulfed her every time she let her mind rest for more than a second, it put her on edge, it made her jump at every loud noise, it made her want to scream into her pillow. It made her want to give up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which was cruel. Because she knew that would never happen. She knew she was too damn stubborn, too damn loyal. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without thinking, Cas boosted herself off of the couch, forcing herself out of her thought spiral she grabbed her coat. She hated how much she loved the warm weight it provided her, hated how she savored the feeling of the well-worn fleece against her skin, how every detail and crease of that jacket suddenly mattered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She found Scorpius looking into the forest, alone. He was a picture of beauty with the mess of greens and blacks spread out in front of him, the moonlight brought the silver in his eyes out as he turned to look at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’ stomach somersaulted. She would never get used to that, that look he gave her. The look that she had still been unable to figure out, but a look that she had quickly fallen in love with. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His breath puffed out in front of him as he talked, “Hey, Weasley” She really tried not to focus on his voice, but that was what Scorpius Malfoy did to her, somehow he allowed her mind, her heart, to focus on every single moment of him. “You okay?” The question was breathy and low, full of something Cas couldn’t comprehend. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was getting exhausting, honestly. Everything was so intense, everything she felt towards him had always been this insane never-ending hole of emotion. Thoughts about his hair, his voice, his mind, his lips, his smile, the way he lived his life, each coming with a complex emotion. Emotion </span>
  <em>
    <span>she </span>
  </em>
  <span>had dealt with, emotion </span>
  <em>
    <span>she</span>
  </em>
  <span> had sorted out. Yet, here he was, looking at her with that annoyingly </span>
  <em>
    <span>confusing</span>
  </em>
  <span>, look in his eye, and she still wasn’t any closer to him. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>still </span>
  </em>
  <span>wasn’t any closer to knowing whether or not she should just shut it all down, force herself to “hate” him again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wrapped her arms around herself, stepping closer to him she laughed breathlessly, “You tell me, Malfoy. You’re the one standing alone in the dark, by a forest...in the dark,” She kept moving forward, indulging in her incessant need to be close to him, “Did I mention alone?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He casually looped his arms around her waist, she hated how normal it had become, she hated how she allowed herself to be content with not knowing. “I’m not alone anymore.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guess not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A hand came to rest against her face, she shivered, his fingers traced her cheek, brushed the tip of her nose, and came back to cradle her neck. A mix of incredible lightness swarmed her inside, followed by the acid of the unknown. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For the first time in months, Cas allowed herself to get angry. Truly angry, the type of anger that allowed her to stand in front of a whole class and hex Scorpius fucking Malfoy, the type of anger that swallowed her whole, that allowed her to be fearless, to stand in burning Horcrux for minutes on end. The familiar heat rose to her cheeks, the fog slowly clouded her common sense. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius tilted his head, immediately reading her mood change, “You didn’t smile…” He stepped back running a hand through his hair, “That always makes you smile…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas shook off his comment, she needed to be angry, it was the only way she’d have the bravery to do this. “What the hell is this?” She hissed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius’ eyebrows shot up, “What--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are all your looks? All of the reassurance, all of the,” She gestured blankly at her face, her lips, her point definitely got across. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>This.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wh-what am I supposed to make of it all? Cause you sure as hell haven’t made it very clear!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shook his head as if doing that could physically clear it. “Cas--” </span>
</p><p><span>“</span><em><span>No.</span></em><span>” Her heartbeat sped up and her voice cracked with fear. Once she said this there was no going back, no second chances,</span><em><span> but then again</span></em><span>, a voice deep in her mind chided. </span><em><span>You might not get the chance again.</span></em><span> “</span><em><span>NO</span></em><span>. B-Because for, for a </span><em><span>year</span></em><span>, we were horrible to each other, </span><em><span>horrible, </span></em><span>I said things I never should have said, and I can fess up to that, I was wrong for doing that. But for a year I only did that because I had no idea what was happening. I didn’t know why it felt like my heart was going to explode whenever you gave me one measly glare, why all, </span><em><span>all</span></em><span> I wanted to do was just be with you.” She didn’t stop when she heard Scorpius’ breathing hitch, she needed to get this out. “Why your </span><em><span>stupid </span></em><span>hair and your</span><em><span> stupid</span></em><span> face and your </span><em><span>stupid,</span></em> <em><span>infuriating</span></em><span> smirk were all I could think about.  When the only thing that made me truly, terrifyingly heartbroken, was when I couldn’t figure out why…” She trailed off, hating how much his response mattered to her, she hated herself for caring so damn much. </span></p><p>
  <span>“Why what?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas took in a deep breath of air, “I could never figure out why I wasn’t good enough, and then Vicky happened...and suddenly I had a million reasons, and that was-- that was </span>
  <em>
    <span>even worse.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Cas’s voice had sunken down to just above a whisper, she couldn’t meet his eyes. “A-and then this happened,” She gestured weakly between the two of them, “and I’m still not any closer to knowing </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Cas tried to gather any lingering fumes of her anger, she would need them to ask this question. “So, holy </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Scorpius Malfoy, what is this? Does it, does </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>even mean </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius met her gaze briefly before chuckling, light, and breathy. Cas almost passed out, after all of that, everything she said, and he’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>laughing.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No, maybe he’s just shocked. It could just be a surprised response. It’s fine.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He stepped forward and placed a hand on her cheek, without thinking Cas leaned into his touch, “Cas,” He had the sweetest, simplest smile on his lips, “Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course, </span>
  </em>
  <span>it meant something, it meant everything.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas froze, her whole being screamed </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry, what?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She stepped back, running her hands through her hair, almost unable to process what he had just said. “Y-you w</span>
  <em>
    <span>hat</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Cas’s brain seemed to be short-circuiting, “You can’t just </span>
  <em>
    <span>say</span>
  </em>
  <span> that!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius’s eyebrows shot up, “Wait, why?” His voice pitched up in worry. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can’t just say that like it happens every day! Like it’s not a big deal! Like it doesn’t even matter!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas!” Scorpius gripped her shoulders, “Just...listen for a sec, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please.</span>
  </em>
  <span> I-I’ve never--I mean, this has never happened to me before.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh?” Cas practically screeched. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, I’ve never memorized the sound of someone’s laugh before, nobody has ever run around my head like you did,” He shuffled his feet, “Like you do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas, I don’t even know how to begin to say how fucked up I am, I can’t even justify the things I said, the things I did when I was with Vicky. But I do know, I was my absolute worst with her, I lost any good you and Ophelia, Al, and Teddy had brought out in me. You were never not good enough for me, it’s always, </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span>, been you. When I was lost, and trying to hide from the way you made me feel, it was because I didn’t think you could ever feel what I felt. Cas,” He placed his fingers under her chin, forcing her to meet his eyes, “it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span> been you.” Despite herself, she smiled, he mirrored the expression, it was genuine and small and all too real for Cas’ heart to handle. Was this really happening? After all this time, could this actually be real? “So, Cassianne Weasley, does that answer your question?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It dawned on her what it all meant, suddenly she was embarrassed under his gaze, it was all so real, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Oh</span>
  </em>
  <span>...um…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas? Please, after </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> this time, after all of our mistakes, and mixed messages I’m gonna ask you just one question.” Her pulse quickened, “All I’ve ever wanted was for you to understand how much I care about you, how much I love the way you smile, and how much you and every little “stupid glare” you send my way matters to me. So,” He stepped forward and took her hands gently, “Will you be mine? No question about it, no more hiding, no more confusion, no more hurt. Just us. Just us trying to get through all the challenges we’re facing...which is no easy feat. But we would at least,” He took a deep breath, “we would at </span>
  <em>
    <span>least</span>
  </em>
  <span> be doing it together.” Cas forgot to breathe, she forgot to think, she forgot her own name. All she did was kiss him. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just us. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>As soon as her lips crashed into his, something clicked, a piece of her moved into place, something she hadn’t even known was missing. But something she would </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely</span>
  </em>
  <span> miss if it was ever gone again. Cas felt Scorpius smile into the kiss as they fell into each other, holding on to anything they could find, just relishing in the moment of </span>
  <em>
    <span>finally knowing</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He cupped her face, his other hand rested in the crook of her neck, everything felt so incredibly right, like if they had this, if they could figure themselves out, maybe everything would be okay. It came to end all too quickly in Cas’ opinion, but even the short amount of contact said a million words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They broke apart. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll take that as a yes?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas laughed, unable to hide her pure glee, “My god, Malfoy,” She wrapped her arms around him, pressing her forehead to his as his arms wrapped around her waist. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Yes.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” He laughed, sweet and raw, and buried his nose into the crook of her neck, giggles bubbled out of Cas’s chest. They just stood there, laughing as the cold from Scorpius’s nose tickled Cas, just two </span>
  <em>
    <span>stupid</span>
  </em>
  <span> teenagers holding on to each other for dear life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas allowed herself to be completely and utterly happy for the first time in a long time.  </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Chapter 26</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This story is a lot longer than we could ever have expected, but we do have a plan and there is an end in sight. Just stick with us for a little while longer haha. We have quite a bit we want to get through but I promise it's all super interesting (if I do say so myself) and if it all goes well it won't be super repetitive. <br/>I hope y'all are enjoying The Shade's Destruction so far...let me know whacha think&lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ophelia blew a stream of air out of her mouth, sitting restlessly on the loveseat as she waited for everyone to be ready. She supposed, though, that this was one of the things that you could never </span>
  <em>
    <span>quite</span>
  </em>
  <span> feel ready for. No matter how much planning they’d done, no matter how many late nights she’d spent doing equations or mapping things out, no matter how many nights she’d wasted trying to sleep but ending up staring in discontent at the ceiling could serve as armor for the situation that was to come. She surmised that she probably hadn’t slept for the last 48 hours between last-minute debriefing and trying to wish away the memories of the last time they’d tried to face a Horcrux, which probably wasn’t a good thing considering that going into something like this dead tired was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not the best idea.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, at the moment, the combination of anxiety and insomnia was making her feel very, </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> awake.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Too</span>
  </em>
  <span> awake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Too alert, too ready. She shouldn’t be ready. She wasn’t ready. Ophelia felt as though she was trapped in her own skin; she needed to do something but couldn’t yet, and she was afraid that when she was doing something, she’d fail at it anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The uncomfortable thought caused Ophelia to subconsciously move her right hand to rest on her thigh, feeling the vibration as her leg bounced restlessly, albeit slightly painful while she waited. She hated that there was still pain. It was barely noticeable at this point, but now, it was all she could focus on. Not just the pain in her thigh, the pain that could mean impaired performance or added danger, but the pain of failure. She’d always hoped she wouldn’t fail, but now she had. She knew she could, and worse: she knew she might again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia pulled her hair out of its band, letting her hair fall back around her shoulders and then immediately deciding to pull it back up into it’s previous ponytail. Her head shot up as she heard Cas sigh, one hand still wrapped around her chocolate locks. She couldn’t help but smile in relief as she set her eyes on her best friend: no less scared, but somehow more at ease. Seeing Cas, and, as she looked around, the other people she could truly call family softened her anticipation and allowed her to do what she had her whole life: use the stress as a fuel for action. If she could just funnel the fear into productivity, she could mistake it for drive or even excitement, and maybe, just maybe, go into this with a level head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, guys. Are we ready?” she asked, knowing that everyone’s internal answer was no, not ever, but getting the affirmation she was looking for.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded, standing up and slinging the small satchel over her shoulder, cross-body. It was all she’d been able to convince Cas to let her bring, but it was full of safety nets: potions, pills, and bandages that she hoped she wouldn’t have to use. The bag hit her hip at a comfortable level with a thud. She could feel the cool metal of the clasp against her waist, a cruel reminder of everything that could go wrong. Grabbing and inconspicuous gray zip-up, Ophelia threw it over her simple black long sleeve and slipped on her most beat-up sneakers. She surveyed the room, acknowledging her friends dressed in their similarly comfortable yet hard-to-notice ensembles, smiling at each other in pure love and terror.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius nodded as she caught his eye, suddenly looking to a larger audience and announcing: “Okay, then. Let’s do this.” There was something bright about him tonight, something that reeked of unbridled energy. She had no idea what place that was coming from, but his confidence, whether fake or not, wrapped a blanket of determination around her as well. They filed quietly out of the tent, Cas leading the charge, but Ophelia soon found herself jogging to catch up with her best friend in the front. She told herself that this was because of the plan, because they, for some reason, were going into this mess first, not that she just needed something normal right now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia bumped her best friend’s shoulder affectionately. “You ready for this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Totally.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The necessary lie floated around them like a fog, causing Ophelia to shiver. She noticed Cas’s acute uncomfortableness and it caused her to pause, offer a “Are you sure you’re okay?” to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The red-head sighed resignedly. “I just...I don’t think I can do this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas, you’re the bravest person I know--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But--I’m not, I’m not, Phelia, I’m terrified.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey.” She shot a sideways glance at her. “Y’know, I once read something that said being fearless isn’t brave, it’s foolish.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you believe that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I...I believe that bravery isn’t the absence of fear, it’s being afraid and doing it anyway. And you do that every day, Cas. I’m really proud of you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas intertwined her hand with Ophelia’s. “You really think we can do this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have too much to lose not to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The cold air bit at Ophelia’s nose with a newfound vengeance, whipping around their faces and chilling her deeper than ever before. It seemed as though every aspect of the earth was aware of what was to come tonight, what had to be done.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had to walk out of there in one piece.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The five of them reached the outskirts of the forest, already noticing the tendrils of fog pouring from within it. Ophelia wondered when the mystifying vapor would turn dark and suffocating, inching the air out of her lungs and the hope out of her heart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe it already had.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, everyone.” she forced herself to pipe up. “Once we reach the clearing, wait for my signal. Cas and I will go in first and surprise...it, then you three will go around the back and pad the attack. With any luck, it won’t see us coming.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hopefully, that luck was on their side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sweet,” said Teddy, rolling up his sleeves. “I’ve been waiting for this sequel for </span>
  <em>
    <span>way </span>
  </em>
  <span>too long.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t even try to hide her smile. She’d take anything she could get at this point...she wasn’t even sure just how many more of these moments she’d get before...</span>
  <em>
    <span>if…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But she couldn’t think about that right now. She couldn’t think about losing when they were so close to...whatever this was. Winning? Hope? Ophelia knew that she couldn’t go into this feeling like they were going to fail, that it might actually happen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Clenching her teeth, Ophelia lifted her wand to the darkness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Lumos</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” she whispered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The light sprung from the tip of her wand, illuminating the still foggy darkness and allowing her to make out the majority of the forest that slowly, </span>
  <em>
    <span>slowly </span>
  </em>
  <span>seemed to be closing in on them.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They could do this. They </span>
  <em>
    <span>needed </span>
  </em>
  <span>to do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Well, at least, we need to try. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>They trudged through the leaves, the winding paths that Ophelia barely recognized until the uneven ground flattened off into a dirt clearing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eerily familiar to the last location something like this had taken place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia tried not to think about that as she approached the center of the clearing. She turned a bit to confirm that Cas was right behind her, let her reach her side, and then turned to the empty space. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>At the last second, Ophelia made eye contact with Teddy across from the clearing, through the first line of trees. As soon as he saw her, the blue-haired boy winked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She could practically hear him. “You’ve got this, Phe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia Lovegood swallowed, smiled back at one of the last faces she might ever see, and then turned back to the clearing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Nox</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” she barely voiced.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even before her eyes had finished adjusting to the darkness, thick and suffocating smoke began to pour into the clearing, filling it up like a glass of water. Immediately, her eyes began to tear up and her chest began to burn. She felt completely and utterly exposed, but if she was right...and dear god, she hoped she was, the smoke wouldn’t know they were there if they didn’t move.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nothing happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It just sat there, hovering close to the ground and beginning to feel the air, as if resting from a long day. Ophelia spared a glance at Cas, who nodded, and they both raised their wands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Transforo!” They broke the silence, startling any remaining life forms that could be in the forest, and pushing a flock of birds to evacuate the trees. The bright green light of the spell lit up the clearing as it rocketed toward the smoke centered there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was their first mistake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In hindsight, Ophelia pondered as everything seemed to freeze, she probably should’ve accounted for the fact that if this thing was blind, all of its other senses would be astronomically heightened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment their voices pierced the quiet, the smoke seemed to tense in an almost sentient way, tuning its senses and clearly estimating where Cas and Ophelia were. Before the spell even reached it, before Al, Teddy, or Scorpius even had time to react, the smoke was already heading for them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia dove for the ground, pulling Cas roughly by the hand even though she was already heading there too. They hit the leaf-strewn grown with a hard thud, and Ophelia could basically feel all of her internal organs scrambling to find their correct places again. From beside her, Ophelia heard an unfamiliar sound, and then Cas cry out. She turned on her side to find Cas clutching her hip, grimacing in pain. For a split second, Ophelia wondered if Cas had broken something, but quickly swallowed that theory along with the bile rising in her throat as Cas removed her hand, showcasing an already blistering burn taking up about six inches of her hip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas! What--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It...it </span>
  <em>
    <span>barely</span>
  </em>
  <span> touched me!” She was in pain, but Cas sounded more angry and incredulous than anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It had burned straight through her clothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What--</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia!” She heard Al screech and shot herself in a random direction before she even registered why he’d called out. She hadn’t been fast enough, though, and the torpedo of deep gray death caught her shoulder as it passed. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Shit,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” she ground out through clenched teeth as she looked to her now mostly bare shoulder, devoid of clothing and already peeling and turning from an angry red to throbbing white, pink building at the edges as her blood tried to make it past the cauterized wound.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Watch out!” She screamed in the boys’ general direction. “It burns!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?!” Teddy called back, too late. Just like she had felt, Ophelia could see the split second of abject terror on his face before the smoke got to him, slamming him straight in the stomach and sending him to ricochet off a nearby tree. She heard at least three people cry out, and she wasn’t even sure if one of them had been her. Blindly stumbling toward him, Ophelia could hear herself calling out for him. She ran toward the tree, neglecting her footing and tripping over an upturned rock. She hit the ground just as she realized she was falling, feeling something tear through her jeans and the skin just above her knee. Throwing her arms out to catch her, Ophelia felt something pop uncomfortably with the force, wincing as her wrist reverberated with some kind of added shock.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not even caring, Ophelia spurred herself on until she was moving, basically falling again at his side once she reached Teddy. He was conscious, thankfully, and tried to smile when he saw her. “Come here often?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Theodore </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking </span>
  </em>
  <span>Lupin, now is not the time for this.” His eyebrows shot up at her first (and probably last) use of his full first name. Most of the bottom of his shirt was burned and ripped away, leaving view of the rapidly blistering burn the smoke had left. Al and Scorpius closed in around them to give them some much-needed cover, and Ophelia choked down what could’ve been either vomit or a sob. She wasn’t quite sure.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t think it really mattered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scrambling, she fished out a potion from inside her satchel, poured the iridescent blue liquid over Teddy’s wound. He grimaced in minimal pain, but seemed soothed enough to stand after a few seconds. The potion would numb the pain, she knew, although it wouldn’t do anything for the actual burn.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But she didn’t have time to think about that right now. She looked around the clearing, bleary-eyed, noticing Cas tie something around a new wound on her calf as Scorpius and Al protected each other, barely holding on. Ophelia helped Teddy lean against the tree nearest them, then pushed in between the remaining two boys to watch.</span>
</p><p><em><span>Watch?</span></em><span><br/></span> <span>She realized in that split second that no one had fired a second spell.</span></p><p>
  <span>Ophelia raised her wand, trying to grip it as tightly as possible with her clammy hands. “Transforo!” She barked, the spell nearly missing both the smoke and Cas. Hobbling over to an empty spot, she fired again. “Transforo!”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Nothing.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Transforo!” Four other voices joined her, all but one missing the Horcrux taunting them in the center of the clearing. The green beam shot through the smoke, leaving a seared hole through it. The hole began to close, but wouldn’t heal completely. It seemed as though the venom was finally making a difference.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it wasn’t enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As quickly as it had been in that spot, the smoke was gone, heading toward Scorpius. He dove in the opposite direction, firing another spell that barely made any dent in the smoke, already halfway across the clearing and heading for Cas.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It had to be enough.</span>
  </em>
  <span> There was no other option. There was nothing else she could do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had to do something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Leaning back, Ophelia was relieved to find the rough but welcoming surface of a tree behind her. Letting her head fall back to rest against it, Ophelia was surprised when her head was met with nothing but air. Suddenly, her back wasn’t touching anything either. She stumbled, grabbing at any possible handhold as she realized the “tree” had given way to a small hill.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She heard Al scream in pain in the distance, screaming in reply and in the hopes that someone, anyone would be able to catch her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But no one came. Ophelia fell back, catching a split-second glimpse of a smoke pillar in front of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Did it just---</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh no. This was not good. Not at </span>
  <em>
    <span>all.</span>
  </em>
  <span> If the smoke could disguise itself as other things…. Who knows what it could do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But here she was, at the bottom of a hill god-knows-where.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With no way of telling any of her friends.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A sound to her left made Ophelia jump. Through the foliage, she could just make out the silhouette of a figure just a little ways away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe someone had heard her screams after all. Calling out, she fumbled her way through the trees, heading straight for the figure…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But when she reached the spot she’d just been staring at...no one was there.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>A few seconds later, her question was seemingly answered by another rustle in the trees. She spotted the figure again, this time even farther than before, and tried to get their attention.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello? Cas? Scorpius? Al? Loudmouth? I’m over here!” Her voice stung and was already hoarse, but Ophelia didn’t care. She couldn’t care right now, when her life and the lives of her family were on the line. She needed to get back. She was the one with the first aid supplies. If something happened and she couldn’t get to them--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shuddered at the thought, choosing instead to race after the silhouette. It was stationary in a small, rock clearing nearby, and Ophelia exhaled a sigh of relief.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank god, I was starting to wonder--” But something was wrong. Even though she was barely five feet away from them now, the figure was still as black as night. It wasn’t entirely whole either, she saw, as the figure began to fume and dissipate before her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The </span>
  <em>
    <span>smoke.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>How could she have been so stupid? Of course, of course, she would be completely idiotic enough to blindly follow a fucking Horcrux into the middle of the woods without anyone by her side on the slightly </span>
  <em>
    <span>possible </span>
  </em>
  <span>hope that it was one of her friends.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, it wasn’t. And now she was here, in the middle of the goddamn wilderness, with her friends probably equally as spread out, facing a Horcrux (or at least part of one) all on her own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia gripped her wand, having to steady her throbbing and swollen wrist with the other hand, turning in sharp spurts around the clearing to try and get a better look at anything that might be coming her way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She probably looked completely mad.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, as if every shadow surrounding her had been holding its breath, the smoke once again began to pool before her, writhing and expanding to create another humanoid shape. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t do this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, game’s up!” She screamed, finding herself a little scary as she began to laugh hysterically. “I get that you like to play with your food, but if you’re going to kill me, just do it! </span>
  <em>
    <span>Just fucking do it!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Ophelia’s legs crumpled beneath her, dragging her to the ground and forcing her to cry out as her still bloody knee was flooded with pain. She couldn’t force herself to look up, to speak. Something about the ground seemed so enticing, the way the leaves seemed to ruffle in the wind of whatever monster was before her, locked in some terrifyingly beautiful dance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If this was the last thing she was ever going to see, Ophelia supposed it wasn’t too bad.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But seconds later, a hand was gripping her softly by the chin and lifting her face to the starlit sky...a very</span>
  <em>
    <span> real,</span>
  </em>
  <span> human feeling hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t get herself to move. Not even when she looked up, and saw not the stars, but a woman in a tattered ball gown above her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not even when Ophelia’s tired eyes realized that she recognized this girl...and that she absolutely could not be here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Helena,” she choked out, feeling a sob rise in the back of her throat. “N-no, you’re dead, you’re dead, you’re not real.” She crawled back, not far enough to meet the trees lest they too, were all lies. “Get away from me, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>bitch--</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ophelia Lovegood,” A sweet yet stern voice interrupted instead. If this were some type of fucked up class, Ophelia would’ve found it astounding that a Horcrux had just made that humanoid of a sound. But right now...right now, she was terrified into silence. “What an interestingly useless creature you are.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“W-what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The fingers around her chin grew tight and confining, pinching her skin and making her jaw ache. “So beautiful,” the voice said in a way that almost sounded like it could’ve been an insult. “So </span>
  <em>
    <span>helpless</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you want from me?” Ophelia asked, not even caring if this ethereal monster of death saw her cry anymore. She allowed the tears to flow down her face and onto the fingers of this woman she used to admire. “What...what do you </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Horcrux continued without acknowledging she had spoken. “Smart beyond her years, and yet somehow unfit for my mother’s house of the wise. Ever wondered why that is?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I d-don’t...don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>care</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” Ophelia attempted to retaliate, but the breeze swallowed her feeble words. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your mother always told you that being a Gryffindor meant you were brave, too bold, and not demure enough to be a Ravenclaw, which I suppose is true.” Ophelia felt as if she were being looked over like a piece of meat might be in a butcher shop. “But the honest virtue is missing too. You’re too headstrong, too reckless, you let your emotions rule you and that makes you </span>
  <em>
    <span>weak</span>
  </em>
  <span>. You try to hide it, but don’t usually succeed, and so you’re unpredictable and hopeless. So, I suppose, really, you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>far too stupid.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before the next sob had even left Ophelia’s throat, the foggy figure was morphing into something new. Just as quickly as it had appeared, the face of Helena was wiped clean like a slate and replaced by another, even more, familiar one.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It turns out you’re nothing but a failure after all,” Her dad’s voice echoed through the trees. He smiled cruelly down at her, and Ophelia could almost fear herself shrinking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dad...d-dad, you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span>--please, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dad, please, don’t--</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And all of your friends know it too, </span>
  <em>
    <span>sweetpea.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” His voice so deftly imitated her father’s as he voiced the familiar nickname only he ever called her. “They can see what a fraud you are, how useless. I suppose they were just as foolish then, to ever think they could rely on </span>
  <em>
    <span>you.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” His voice rose above human volume, making her ears ring, and her whole body shake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Dad</span>
  </em>
  <span>-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The hand around her chin fell down to surround her throat in black mid. “Sooner or later, you’re going to disappoint them </span>
  <em>
    <span>all over again</span>
  </em>
  <span>!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>N-NO!</span>
  </em>
  <span>, No, no, dad, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please--</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You can’t go on pretending forever!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Her father’s figure melted away back into the smoke she feared even more. The smoke began to wrap around her arms, burning again as it had before, and eliciting screams from her that she didn’t even know she could make. They didn’t even feel like her own, rising from some unknowable place inside her, filling her throat and the clearing as she cried, taking up more space and shifting the gears of her brain as she knew it was over.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And that they were right all along.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A plume of smoke formed from the back of the mass, coiling and rising above her head, preparing to bare down and strike. Ophelia closed her eyes as tight as she could, clenching her teeth and preparing for the blow that was going to be her inevitable end--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it never came.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What did come, however, was a scream. Much, much worse than hers. A scream of pain, a scream of all and any resolve leaving the body, a scream of life </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying </span>
  </em>
  <span>to leave the body.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Scorpius hadn’t been right in front of her, Ophelia wouldn’t have been able to recognize that as his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it was. And here he was, writhing in pain into unearthly positions as he screamed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The wound was so big, Ophelia couldn’t even see the source.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had to get to him. She had to</span>
  <em>
    <span> help </span>
  </em>
  <span>him. But she couldn’t move. Her limbs felt like they were filled with lead, holding her down and pulling her to the bottom of this ocean of guilt.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No, no, no.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>How was she to know that anyone else was still alive? Could this have happened to each and every one of her friends? All because she...</span>
  <em>
    <span>she…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She could hear branches breaking behind her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia didn’t care if it was the Horcrux at this point. </span>
  <em>
    <span>How much did she really have left to live for?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The sound of Teddy Lupin calling out her name reminded her of at least one. He was by her side in a split second, and Ophelia could make out Cas and Al rushing toward the broken boy before her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were okay.</span>
  <em>
    <span> They were okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She wasn’t alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’s heartbreaking screams echoed through the forest. Ophelia wouldn’t be surprised if their noses were all bleeding by the end of this. She and Al were both crying, probably from pain and from the fact that one of their best friends had been attacked, wasn’t moving at all anymore, and could be...could be…</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dead.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phe!” Teddy was gripping her by the shoulders, causing her to shriek in pain as his hand closed around the burn. He quickly whipped his hands away, as if he were somehow the monster that had done this. He opted instead to cup her face with his hands, shaking her gently. “Phe, are you okay? Are you--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He--he--I saw...a-and then he just--” Ophelia let another sob shake her body, causing Teddy to lift her head back up so she could meet his eyes. She noticed, now, the tear tracks trailing down his similar blood and dirt-stained face. His nose was bleeding, too, but he was still just as absolutely breathtaking as when Ophelia had first met him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shouldn’t be thinking about this right now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She swallowed another sob. “I--I couldn’t stop it, Teddy. I was stupid and I let it...it lead me here and then...then I saw...I s-saw something and I tried to move but I c-couldn’t and it...it was going to kill me and I was screaming and I couldn’t bre--breathe and I thought I was going to </span>
  <em>
    <span>die</span>
  </em>
  <span> and then Scorpius...</span>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius….</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Her eyes wandered to the heap of human that Cas and Al surrounded, both of them frantically trying to talk to him, to keep him awake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, at least that meant he was alive.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>For now. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Phelia</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Teddy forced her eyes back on his, away from her mutilated friend. “Look at me, don’t look at them, look at me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia nodded frantically, grappling for her only tether in the storm of pain and guilt that tore at her entire being. “I--I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>God,</span>
  </em>
  <span> I thought I was never going to be able to hear your voice again,” Teddy mumbled, pulling her into a loose but needed hug. She pulled away quickly, though, as the incessant thoughts about Scorpius’s welfare slashed at her mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy, I don’t know how--what if he...he…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He won’t.” Neither of them had said the word, but they both somehow knew the gravity of the situation. “He won’t, because...because you’re</span>
  <em>
    <span> not</span>
  </em>
  <span> going to let him, okay, Phe?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But I can’t--</span>
  <em>
    <span>I can’t--</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey.” He steadied her again. “I need your head in this, okay? I need you to use every last brain cell in that genius little mind of yours, okay, because you’re the only one who can do this right now and he needs you. We need you to do this. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I know you can, Phe</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay...</span>
  <em>
    <span>okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Ophelia forced herself to rise from the ground, swaying on stiff legs but more alert, now, more alive. She could do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Even if I can’t, I have to. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She swallowed, hoping the burn in her throat might have subsided. It hadn’t, and she could barely hear her own voice, but it was going to have to be enough. “We need to get him out of here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phelia!” Cas cried out. She would’ve sounded almost angry if Ophelia didn’t know her better. “He needs help! You have to--you have to help him, </span>
  <em>
    <span>oh my God</span>
  </em>
  <span>,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Please</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Al called out, his eyes piercing through the last layer of doubt and dispute filling her mind. Ophelia crouched down, albeit uncomfortably, in front of Scorpius. She needed to see him alive, needed to see him </span>
  <em>
    <span>breathe.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She could feel a pulse pretty easily, but his breathing was shallow. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Too shallow</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It wasn’t enough. His eyes were open, though, and Ophelia could feel him trying to flounder through the veil of grogginess and pain and sleep. She doused the rest of the painkilling potion over his injuries, barely caring that she didn’t have the ingredients to make more. His breathing seemed to ease up a bit, but that was of absolutely no comfort as Ophelia got a better look at his injuries.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia bit back a scream as she took in the burn consuming the majority of his torso, spindling up his arms as well. It blistered and bubbled as she watched it, causing her to swallow the bile rising eminently in her throat and force herself not to look away. The skin around his throat and shoulders was intact but bruised an angry purple, a color that was already turning and made Ophelia fear for Scorpius’s pain tolerance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then she saw his collarbone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia had to turn into Cas, holding up her friend just as much as she was holding her, as she tried to steady her heartbeat and collect her thoughts. Cas shook the both of them with her sobs, and she was trying, trying to speak, but none of her words quite made it out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia used every ounce of her willpower to face the exposed muscle over his left collarbone where the Horcrux had burned away all three layers of his skin. She didn’t know if she’d be able to repair it all, the nerve endings, the muscle, the skin alone was a feat in and of itself. He might never be the same.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>If he survived.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shut the fuck up, brain, goddamnit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes were open, still, and Ophelia tried to put on a brave face for him. “It’s alright, Scorpius, we’re gonna fix this. I’m gonna fix this, we just have to get you home.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius opened his mouth, trying to speak while Al tried equally as hard to stop him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scorpius, just rest right now, y-you don’t have to--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did...did...” his voice, cracking and barely audible created a wave of silence over the rest of them. “D-did we win?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Cas spoke, smiling for him because she knew he needed it, no matter if everything she was saying was a lie. “Yeah, we won.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Scorpius tried to nod but jerked in pain as the simple movement wreaked havoc on his body. Ophelia knew that getting him back to the tent was going to be the worst part, but they couldn’t stay here. They </span>
  <em>
    <span>couldn’t. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Scorpius’s eyes began to flutter closed.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, </span>
  <em>
    <span>n</span>
  </em>
  <span>o,” Cas stroked his face, the gesture both one of affection and to keep him as conscious as possible. “Stay with me okay? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Stay with me</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Chapter 27</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Okay, okay, okay,” Ophelia repeated the word, letting it roll off her tongue as if saying it more than once might mean she would actually feel okay right now. “We need to get him back to the tent. It...it’s going to hurt him but we have to do it. Luckily, since these are burn wounds, they cauterize themselves so it’s not like he’s going to bleed out or anything...but...well, all my first aid is only temporary and the stuff I really need is back home, so...so we’re going to have to move him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy shot her a grin. “There’s my genius.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas, however, seemed dubious. “Phelia...he’s already in so much pain, I don’t wanna...w-we can’t--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia placed what she hoped was a comforting hand on Cas’s shoulder. “I know, Cas, I don’t want to either but...we don’t have another choice.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s always another choice--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cas. Who knows where...where that thing could be right now, it could still be looking for us, and if Scorpius doesn’t get the help he needs soon…” she let her words trail off, but she knew that Cas would get the point.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, that seemed to sober her. All she could manage in confirmation was a nod, but that was all she needed. Ophelia beckoned Al and Teddy over, who carefully lifted the limp figure from the ground and thankfully didn’t drop him, even when the movement and Al’s hand on his ribcage brought him back to consciousness and made him yell out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, at least one thing about this screwed up situation made sense. Ophelia wondered how many of his ribs might actually be broken. In all honesty, she didn’t want to know. She elected to stabilize his head as they trudged slowly out of the forest. Cas hadn’t moved from his side and was currently allowing Scorpius to essentially snap her hand in two with the force of his grip. He’d drunkenly tried to assure her that this was better than screaming because ears were harder to fix than hands, which made about as much sense as the fact that Ophelia was still managing to think about Teddy and Scorpius’s burns at the same time, but none of them were going to acknowledge that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If he was still talking, he was still breathing, and that was all that mattered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia felt as if she’d aged ten years by the time Al was pushing the flaps of their tent aside to allow entry to the small room they’d designated as the infirmary. Setting Scorpius down with a pained grunt (Ophelia wasn’t quite sure if it came from Scorpius or someone else in the group), Ophelia rushed over to her larger, well, at least more stocked bag and rummaged through it, praying her fingers would close around the right potion by intuition alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>C’mon, you dumbass, you’re a witch.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh, yeah.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia pulled her wand from where she’d hastily stuck it in her waistband, shoving it into the satchel and forcing herself to say the incantation. A blue-tinged crystal bottle shot into her hand, the viscus silver liquid sloshing around its kaleidoscope walls. Ophelia bit her lip in concern, sparing Scorpius a glance as he lay on the infirmary bed. He was in much less pain now, as the potion she’d used in the forest provided the comfortable illusion of healing, but still experiencing discomfort. If it worked, this Potion wouldn’t only relieve the pain but would do the most important thing: regrow his seared muscle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hurrying to his side, Ophelia gave Cas what she hoped was a reassuring look before realizing that her efforts could be started, at least for now, because Cas wasn’t even looking in her general direction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which was, of course, to be expected, seeing as the sometimes-love-of-Cas’s-life was currently hanging in the balance. She was the only one who could help him, which made it all the scarier.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was the kind of situation that made Ophelia question every decision she’d ever made, the feeling that seemed to grow ever stronger as she poured the iridescent liquid over Scorpius’s burns and watched it do absolutely nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, no, no.” Ophelia muttered without meaning to. “Shit.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Cas was immediately facing her, worry creasing every inch of her face. “What happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing, Cas, that’s the problem.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No news is good news, right?” Ophelia sighed, feeling the tears rise in her throat again at the mere urgency in her friend’s eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, it would be, except...this Potion was actually supposed to do something. It’s a treatment I’d saved for burns, but...I think this might be too severe. This’ll barely help the mending of his skin, and do virtually nothing for his muscles and bones.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas’s eyes never left Scorpius as she voiced what Ophelia was also wondering. “So, what do we do now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not sure.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There has to be something, Phelia, please--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There will be. I just...don’t know what it is yet.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nothing was enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia racked her brains, chiding herself for forgetting any little detail she’d ever learned, furrowing her brows in contempt at her own existence and praying for an answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>One came...but she absolutely didn’t like it. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No, I can’t do that. I won’t do that, I won’t put any of us through that.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“What aren’t we doing?” Teddy asked, somehow immediately at her side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was amazing how quickly he was able to move, considering he wasn’t in the best shape either. She led him over to a chair, pushing him down into it and leaving no room for debate in her expression. She needed him to take a break, partly because if he wasn’t okay...there was no way she could be, and partly to get out of Cas’s earshot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia loved her best friend, but it wouldn’t do her any favors to hear the genuine fucking blasphemy that was about to leave her lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s this...spell, right? I read about it right before we left, and I...I tore the page out and brought it with us, just in case, right? I didn’t think we’d actually need it.”</span>
</p><p><span>“Well, that’s good, right? The spell might be able to help Scorpius...right?”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“In theory, yes, but….Teddy, I don’t know if I can. I got it out of one of...Madam Pomfrey’s files.”</span></p><p>
  <span>Teddy spluttered despite the situation. “You--you </span>
  <em>
    <span>stole</span>
  </em>
  <span> something from Madam Pomfrey?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not important right now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not letting this go. You will be hearing about this later. “ The sad smile that graced her face meant, </span>
  <em>
    <span>How is it that you make everything feel so safe when my entire world is falling to fucking pieces?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is important is that only seriously professional healers learn how to use it. It’s apparently really hard to master, and really painful to whoever’s receiving it. I...I don’t know if Scorpius can handle that, physically or mentally, and...I don’t exactly have time to perfect this thing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy looked up at her through thick eyelashes. “You’re telling me, you, Ophelia Lovegood, that there’s a spell you can’t master? I don’t believe it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Phe, listen. You’re the smartest person I know, and our friend needs you right now. You have to do this for him. The risk is worth the reward.” He took her hand in his. “I know that. You know that. If you can’t figure out this spell, no one can. You have to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighed in both agreement and defeat. “Okay. Okay, I can do this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Returning to Scorpius, Ophelia had to stop a few feet from his bed in fear of breaking down right then and there from sheer terror. If she screwed this up…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. No. She couldn’t think about this right now.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Sooner or later, you’re going to disappoint them all over again.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Stop it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe that was true, but it sure as hell wasn’t going to be now. It couldn’t be now, she wouldn’t let it be, because...because if it was, there wasn’t a point to any of it anymore. She was losing everything she was fighting for by the second. She had to fix this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Giving Cas a pointed look, her best friend wisely but reluctantly stepped back, going to stand by Al and Teddy near the chair in the corner of the room. Lifting her wand, Ophelia traced the air in the intricate swerving shape she’d forced herself to memorize, mumbling the equivocal spell and hoping that her sheer force of will would be enough to save this goddamn shipwreck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Instaurabo.” the word fell from her lips, foreign and terrifying.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A blue light spread from the tip of her wand, encasing Scorpius’s entire torso in its glow. The light glistened and twisted, making Ophelia wonder why the hell she was so scared before. It seemed so...soft, so comforting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe this was the answer. She watched as the spell began to intertwine itself with Scorpius, almost pulling at itself as it attempted to piece him back together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then, he began to scream.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Horrible, heart wrenching, suffocating screams that filled the tent and pulled the tears to flow from Ophelia’s eyes. His back arched off of the cot, his hands gripping at anything they could reach. His eyes were scrunched shut, but he was crying--the droplets tracked down his face and soaked the pillow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wanted to stop. So badly. He didn’t deserve this after everything. No one deserved this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She turned to Cas. Teddy had his arms around her, thank god, or she probably would’ve barrelled right into Ophelia and killed them both. She was screaming, too, but the shrill tone was punctuated by sobs as Cas clawed at Teddy’s grasp and tried to save him in any way she could think of.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A sob pushed past Ophelia’s own lips as she watched the scene unfold. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Al turn and hurry out of the room with a purpose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It hurt even more because she knew what she was doing was that purpose he needed to get away from this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So did Ophelia. But she couldn’t. She wouldn’t. She would stay up all goddamn night doing this if she had to, Ophelia Lovegood was not going to let him die. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tears blurred her vision, but she tried her best to stay focused on the spell, focus on Scorpius, focus on saving him and keeping him alive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cas broke from Teddy’s grasp, electing instead to pace around the room. Her steps were staggered and erratic, never in quite the same spot twice, and it made Ophelia want to stop everything and rush to her, take Scorpius out of this miserable moment just to be able to tell Cas that he was okay. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy-” she called out, cringing as Scorpius released a particularly harrowing scream. “Teddy!” She called again, and in an excruciatingly long second, he was by her side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is it, Phe?” His voice was drenched in concern, brittle, and on the verge of collapse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I...I need your help.” His eyes shone with the light of adrenaline and the glitter of anticipation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything, Phelia.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t keep this up for long...and after I finish with, well...whatever this is, I’m going to need to treat and bandage it immediately. I need you...to help me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nurse Lupin does have a nice ring to it.” His explicit attempt to cheer her up fell short, but Ophelia felt the pang of gratefulness anyway. “What do you need me to do? Get something from your bag? Hand you stuff when you call for it like in those weird muggle reality TV shows?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Teddy...I need you to help. The span of time where this spell finishes off and the time where I need to treat the burns so they actually heal well and don’t leave a lot of scarring is really short. I need you to treat his wounds the minute I put my wand away.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy’s face creased with worry. “Phe...I wanna help you any way that I can, but...I can’t do that. I don’t know how to do that, I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy. I didn’t watch you study yourself into a nervous breakdown these past few months to become a healer for nothing.  You know the material, you know you can do this. I know you can do this. Loudmouth, I believe in you, just like I know you’ve always believed in me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Teddy took a deep breath. Slowly, he nodded. “Okay. Okay, whatever you need.” His face smoothed over, taking on a brave expression. “I got this. What do you need me to get?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s this little pot of pink lotion-y stuff in my bag, I need you to get it, a-and as soon as the spell finishes, I need you to use your wand to siphon it on his burns, okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His breath became shaky, but he agreed all the same. “Alright...alright, okay, pink lotion, okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blue light emanated from Ophelia’s wand began to fade, shrinking back into the tip of her wand. Scorpius’s breath eased up a bit, his head falling back to rest on the pillow. Teddy rushed over, practicing the procedure exactly as Ophelia had taught him and magically allowing the lotion to sink into Scorpius’s injuries. It seemed to soothe him, and in a split second, Cas was at his side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sleep seemed eager to overtake him, but Ophelia didn’t feel comfortable leaving him. Her eyebrows still held tension, and she didn’t even realize she was standing there frozen until Teddy placed a hand on her shoulder.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Phelia, you should probably go get some rest. We’ve all had a long day.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shook her head adamantly. “No, no, I can’t leave him. What if--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Phe.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” The seriousness in his tone prompted her to face him. “He’ll be okay. You did an amazing job, and he deserves some sleep. You deserve some sleep. And,” he chuckled softly, his eyes moving from hers to look behind Ophelia.  “It’s not like Cas is going anywhere soon.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ophelia turned as well, letting her gaze fall on Cas, who’d dragged a chair to sit beside his cot. Her eyes never left his closed ones, her fingers ghosted his peaceful face and opened the door for Ophelia to wonder about what might have happened before everything she cared about went wrong.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You're probably right.” She sighed, rubbing her eyes as if it might somehow breathe new life into them. Following Teddy into the next room, Ophelia sat down on her bed and removed her hair from its trap. Her now dirty and matted locks fell around her shoulders in clumps, but she was much too tired to care. Instead of disappearing into the bathroom to get ready for bed, Teddy sat down next to her. He was quiet for a few seconds before working up the nerve to speak. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How’re you doing?” He asked, smiling softly at her out of the corner of his eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighed in resignation. For the first time all day, Ophelia had been allowed a moment of comfort, and she could never be more thankful for it. “As good as I can be, I guess. I mean, my wrist is probably sprained and the cut on my knee is definitely going to leave a scar, but we’re all still here, and that’s all I care about.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He grinned at her again, a real, true, Teddy Lupin smile. A smile, she was beginning to realize, had become so familiar because she’d seen him flash it countless times at other people.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Other</span>
  <em>
    <span> girls.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Once and a while, Ophelia allowed her mind to fold in on itself like this. This was a moment where everything was wrong, where tonight had reminded her that nothing was safe, so what was one more heartbreak, really? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’d been much too comfortable lately, she realized. That was her problem: she’d allowed herself to believe that things were okay, allowed herself to be happy, allowed herself to wonder if maybe, just maybe Teddy might feel the same way that she did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tonight had ripped all of that apart. Nothing was okay; Scorpius was in pieces and everyone else was barely holding themselves together. And...she wasn’t happy, not anymore, because she knew it could all end in a flash, that they might lose, that she was a failure, and because it had started to seem like she wasn’t the only one who believed that anymore. She wasn’t happy because every time she let herself look at Teddy fucking Lupin, like, really look at him...she wondered if he believed it too. Instead of looking into his eyes and seeing hazel, she saw the flirtatious glances at every girl who walked beside him, and the barely-there ones he spared her in compensation. Instead of imagining running her hands through his electric blue hair, all she could see was the many sets of fingers who’d tread that ground before. Instead of seeing the boy she’d let herself fall way too hard and fast for, she saw the one everyone fell for. That was how it was. And that was how it would always be. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because Ophelia wasn’t allowed to hope. She wasn’t allowed to feel things like this, because she wasn’t allowed anything good. None of them were. Something had determined a long time ago that she didn’t deserve it. And she was just going to have to live with that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phe?” Teddy’s voice faded back into focus. “Phe, are you sure you’re okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She nodded, forcing herself to pretend he wasn’t actively ruining her. “Yeah, just...thinking.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y’know,” he ventured, “Whatever happened back there, you can talk to me about it. You know that, right? I’m always going to be here for you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For once. The words hurt more than helped. He swept a stray piece of her hair behind her ear, and that was it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The cord of resolve, or wish to protect her own sanity and Teddy’s ego snapped. She moved away from him, not even caring when the sudden motion unhooked the just fixed strand of hair and pulled it to fall in front of her eyes. “What’s wrong?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How many girls have you told that pretty line to before?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She frantically gestured to her own hair. “How many girls of your little entourage have you comforted like that? Veronica? Jade? Hell, probably all of them, huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stood, and in a single infuriating second, he was mirroring her. That made it all so much worse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stop it!” She felt like a true toddler, throwing a fit over something no one else could understand. “Just--stop it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stop what, Phelia?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Saying things that make me want to kiss you.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Saying shit that makes me think that I might have a fucking chance!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That stopped him dead. The confusion didn’t leave his face for a second, but something about it had tipped him off to what might be going on. “A...chance at what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is this to you, anyway?” Ophelia said instead. “Is this just what you do with all of your little conquests until you get bored, or is...is there actually something?” The words caught in her throat. “Am I actually something to you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His face was a mixture of hurt, surprise, confusion, and something that Ophelia was not going to allow herself to believe was...adoration? “Phe--” he choked on whatever he was attempting to say next and letting the room fall silent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wanted so desperately to let herself love him. But she </span>
  <em>
    <span>couldn’t.</span>
  </em>
  <span> She couldn’t because he couldn’t, and there was no point. Still, even if there wasn’t...she would hate herself forever if she didn’t at least try. Her world was going to shit, and she at least deserved an attempt to get the one good thing left.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So, she kissed him. She grabbed him by the back of his neck and kissed him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a few seconds, Ophelia realized that it had been an absolute shit decision. How did Cas play at confidence so easily? When she just gave up and crashed their lips together, he froze. He didn’t push her away, he didn’t kiss back, he just stopped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And now, she might have just ruined their friendship, among everything else.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Stumbling back, Ophelia stared back into Teddy’s astonished eyes. Backing toward the doorway, she tried to form words. “I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead of letting her go, or cussing her out, or ignoring it at all, though. Teddy stepped forward, hooked an arm around her waist, and with a low growl, pulled her lips back to his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This couldn’t be happening.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It couldn’t be, but Ophelia was damned if she wasn’t going to let it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Allowing herself to fall into an easy rhythm, she tried to shut her brain off. Forget the uncertainty, forget the confusion, forget the hurt and all of it and just kiss him. He might vanish in a few seconds, but Ophelia didn’t even care.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe she did deserve some good.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His strong arms pulled her close, and Ophelia let her hands float up to card through his hair. She didn’t want this to end. It was rather ironic, she supposed, kissing him so passionately while her world crashed down around her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>You know what?</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck irony.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The way they kissed was poetry: lilting, angelic, and deep. Everything you’d ever hope for anyone to understand; fantastical and yet so real.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After what could’ve been Ophelia’s entire lifetime, they broke apart. The moment the bliss was gone, the doubt floated back, and the last semi-logical part of Ophelia’s brain reminded her that this didn’t actually fix anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What...was…that?” She said through stilted breath. Out of all the many lyrics, the romance novels she was building and burning in her mind, all she needed to know at that moment was why. “That doesn’t make anything clearer, Teddy! I don’t--I don’t get it. What was that, what is this? Please, tell me because I </span>
  <em>
    <span>need</span>
  </em>
  <span> to know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He scratched his neck awkwardly, his gaze leaving hers for the first time since she’d screamed at him and tracing the ground. “I’m...not good at this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She spluttered. That...also </span>
  <em>
    <span>wasn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> an answer. “Good at what?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This! Uh...explaining how I feel. I’ve never been good at explaining this kind of thing, or...explaining what I want.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyebrows must’ve cleared the stratosphere. Still, every fiber of her body was curious. “Well, what...what do you want?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>God,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Phe...I wanna...I wanna </span>
  <em>
    <span>kiss</span>
  </em>
  <span> you, all the time, and know that you’re okay with it and that I don’t have to worry and that I’m lucky enough to do that whenever I can, every day, because you’re mine for once, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted. I want to hold your hand out in public and have no doubt in my mind, or your mind, or anyone else’s what it means, and twirl you even when there’s no music because I’m an idiot like that, and just...remind myself that you’re there. I want to change my hair color randomly without telling you to scare the shit out of you and make you fake mad at me, so I get to be overdramatic to try and win you over until you kiss me, o-or, or just so you can tell me that you like it better blue again. I want us to be able to share looks in the middle of conversations about the stupidest things, and our friends will think we’re insane and won’t have any idea what it means, but that doesn’t matter because we do. I want us to go out and get teddy bears, and one can be brown and one can have blue hair which is just so awesome because I’m obviously the cooler one, whether I’m a bear or not, and...I want you to steal my hoodies because you say they’re technically yours now too, and I’ll pretend to be annoyed but really I don’t care if you ever give it back because maybe you have my sweatshirt but I have you. I want </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Phelia.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe it’s okay to get comfortable,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she told herself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy...I--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, no,” He shook his head, smiling sadly. “You don’t have to, you don’t have to say anything---”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Loudmouth, are you kidding me?” A laugh bubbled up from her chest, but she soon saw it had the exact opposite effect that she’d intended.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, yeah, I know.” He said, so defeated that the laugh morphed into a sob inside her throat. “It’s okay, that’s what I thought, you don’t need to apologize or--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Teddy.” She drew his eyes to hers with the tone of voice, trying to coax a smile onto his lips. “That’s not what I meant at all, I...actually, quite the opposite. I’m…” she laughed out of sheer mirth and incredulousness at his surprise. “I’m kind of obsessed with you, Loudmouth.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, </span>
  <em>
    <span>yeah</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” She took his hand. “So we can hold hands, and we can kiss, and I’d love to steal your sweaters.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He took a shaky breath, but laughed, stepping closer to her. “I’m gonna hold you to that, Phe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just please, for the love of </span>
  <em>
    <span>God</span>
  </em>
  <span>, never turn your hair yellow, or I might just have to break up with you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He grinned, and it held something deeper. “Break up with...that implies you’d be with--so, wait, you’d actually want to be with me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could ask you the same question.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He laughed again, smirking at her in his beautifully customary way. “I seriously can’t believe you’d ever think differently.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re lucky you’re cute.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But really, really, Ophelia knew.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> was the lucky one.</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
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